# The First Chapter test!



## Bar steward (Jul 29, 2010)

The best thing about Amazon Kindle is that it allows you to read 10% of a book before you purchase, so who is interested in doing the following:

Submit your book title here and I (and everyone else who wants to join in) will read the very first chapter and say what they think, would they continue reading on the strength of that first chapter, and if not, why not?


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## John Brinling (Jul 25, 2010)

I like the idea and I'll be your first guinea pig.

My Kindle book is titled: The Ghost Of A Flea
Author: John Brinling
https://www.amazon.com/dp/B003WQBD96
Prices at $2.99

Enjoy and let me hear what you think.


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## Bar steward (Jul 29, 2010)

It's 18.41 here, so I'll be on later tonight and I download the sample then.


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## Guest (Jul 30, 2010)

I have a feeling this is more of a Writer's Cafe thing. 

Edit: I don't really mind or anything. It's just that we invite readers to peruse our work with every post we make. As much as we all leave hearing what people think about our books, I'd think many readers would be hesitant to voice their criticisms to the author so directly. Now fellow authors on the other hand...


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## Bar steward (Jul 29, 2010)

Can the thread get moved?


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## CJ West (Feb 24, 2010)

I disagree, Jason. I think that readers are better positioned to comment. If I was moderating, I'd leave the thread here for readers to comment on KB writers' work.

Personally I refrain from commenting on other writers work in public unless I'm writing a glowing review.

I will, however, open myself up for reader criticism.

My latest book, The End of Marking Time


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## Maria Romana (Jun 7, 2010)

I agree that the first chapter (or in some cases, the prologue) has to be enough to capture the reader's attention. In fact, the first couple paragraphs, or even the first few *sentences* had better grab my interest, or I might not make it that far. There's too much good stuff out there for me to force myself to read something that's not totally sucking me in, no matter how much everyone else loved it.

Go ahead--try the prologue to Little Miss Straight Lace. It's only about 3 pages, romantic suspense (about 50/50). I think it would tell most people whether the book was up their alley or not, better than any description or review.

The Story:
When a beautiful and brilliant biostatistician learns a bit too much about her pharmaceutical client's latest research, her life begins to spin out of control, and a dashing computer security expert from South America seems the perfect antidote. But is his sudden arrival just the happy coincidence it seems? Find out in this complex novel that promises a roller coaster ride of murder, mayhem, sex, and drugs-of the pharmaceutical variety, of course-until the very last page.

--Maria


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## Harry Shannon (Jul 30, 2010)

At the moment my most popular one seems to be ONE OF THE WICKED so here is the info and link...

*From Booklist*
Mick Callahan, the former Navy SEAL turned psychologist and radio talk-show host, not to mention amateur sleuth, thinks he's just doing a friend a favor. Bud Stone, a former military comrade, is in a bit of a pickle: he owes some money to a charmer named Big Paul Pesci, and he's also worried about his one-time girlfriend, Brandi, whom he asks Mick to keep an eye on. But when Bud rips off a drug dealer to pay the mob boss, the situation explodes, with Mick caught in the blast. This, the third Callahan novel, is the best of this young series, tightly plotted and sharply written. Mick continues to be a very compelling series lead, a hero who is flawed in interesting but not incapacitating ways. With any luck this is still early days for this increasingly addictive series. --David Pitt 
Product Description
Psychologist and talk show host Mick Callahan owes his buddy from the Navy Seals. Big time. So when Bud "Bone" Stone comes asking for help, Callahan, despite some problems of his own, simply cannot refuse. It seems Stone cut some corners trying to make a fast buck. Now he's a big mess involving some small time con men, a lot of missing money, and a Vegas wise guy. It all seems simple at first. "Bone" just wants Callahan to an eye on his ex-mistress, a girl named Brandi DeLillo. He can't be around to do it himself, because has to find a couple hundred thousand dollars to pay off mob boss Big Paul Pesci.

Callahan reluctantly agrees to watch the girl. He summons his eccentric friends to assist, and tries to get back to his career. But when Bud Stone decides the fastest way to fix the problem is to steal drug money from a local gang leader, all hell breaks loose. A surprising new character enters Mick's life. Brandi DeLillo disappears. Mick gets kidnapped, beaten and dragged to the construction site of an eye-popping new casino in Nevada's Valley of Fire. There are sinister strippers, murdered goons and weird bodyguards. We meet a giant European hit man and a mysterious gambler called ET. Once again, poor Mick is up to his neck in violence. Only this time he's also on the run from both the mob and the law.

One of the Wicked, the third novel in the Mick Callahan series, is a page-turning and compulsively readable thriller that will keep you guessing to the very last scene.

http://www.amazon.com/One-Wicked-Callahan-Novel-ebook/dp/B003DKK1HG/ref=pd_sim_kinc_1?ie=UTF8&m=AG56TWVU5XWC2


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## D.A. Boulter (Jun 11, 2010)

I'll play.

Pelgraff







. The prologue is very short.


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## Maria Romana (Jun 7, 2010)

D.A. Boulter said:


> I'll play.
> Pelgraff
> 
> 
> ...


Yep, it's very short, and yet it's enough to suck you in. I'm not even a sci fi fan, but I give this prologue a big thumbs up.

--Maria


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## Nell Gavin (Jul 3, 2010)

Here's mine: http://www.nellgavin.com/prologue.htm


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## Dawn McCullough White (Feb 24, 2010)

_I'm in. Cameo the Assassin, which is a historical, dark fantasy:

On Kindle: http://www.amazon.com/Cameo-Assassin-Book-One-ebook/dp/B003QCIQ3M/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&m=AG56TWVU5XWC2&s=digital-text&qid=1280583319&sr=1-1

And on Smashwords: http://www.smashwords.com/books/view/16637_

Synopsis: ~A dark fantasy set in the pseudo 18th century. In a world of corrupt royals, charming libertines and the supernatural, sometimes the anti-hero is the only hero you can find.

With a foiled revolution dividing the land, the royal family enlist the aid of assassins to keep things in order. The townsfolk entertain themselves regaling in stories of the undead said to walk the graveyards at night. . . and of Cameo the killer with corpse-like eyes. Scarred and jaded, Cameo is one of the most formidable assassins in the employ of the Association. Moving from one mission to the next, she meets two dashing highwaymen who unwittingly throw in with the dangerous and otherworldly Cameo. But that's where the story really begins...


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## L.J. Sellers novelist (Feb 28, 2010)

I post the first chapters of all my novels on my website. Here's a link to SECRETS TO DIE FOR.

http://ljsellers.com/wordpress/jackson/secrets-to-die-for/secretstodiefor-excerpt

BTW: I've read THE END OF MARKING TIME and it's a one-of-kind story. Recommended!
L.J.


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## CJ West (Feb 24, 2010)

Thanks LJ!

That means a lot coming from you.

CJ


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## Carolyn Kephart (Feb 23, 2009)

I'll play. 

The first chapter of *The Ryel Saga* is available on my website at http://home.comcast.net/~kephart/ryelsagafirstchapter.html.

The wysard Ryel Mirai leaves the great Art-citadel Markul to rediscover the long-lost spell that will release his mentor from the wraithworld of the Void, but a malignant sorcerer likewise imprisoned has enlisted the aid of Ryel's strongest rival to find the spell first. Amid dangers, joys and temptations, Ryel discovers unlikely allies to help him in his quest, and learns that he may well gain all that he wishes...although perhaps not as he wished it.

CK


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## Betsy the Quilter (Oct 27, 2008)

Bar steward said:


> Can the thread get moved?


It's your thread, Scott, I can put it wherever you'd like it; this morning, before coffee, I read it as you were looking for reader input, so the Book Bazaar seemed appropriate. If you want input from other authors, the Writers' Cafe would be appropriate.

Let us know, if you want it moved, Ann or I can do it.

Betsy


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## Maria Romana (Jun 7, 2010)

L.J. Sellers said:


> Here's a link to SECRETS TO DIE FOR.
> http://ljsellers.com/wordpress/jackson/secrets-to-die-for/secretstodiefor-excerpt
> L.J.


Now that's a first chapter with a hook! Well done!

--Maria


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## L.J. Sellers novelist (Feb 28, 2010)

Thanks, Maria! I think it's my strongest first chapter. But some readers think the opening of Thrilled to Death is just as good.

http://ljsellers.com/wordpress/jackson/thrilled-to-death/thrilled-to-death-excerpt
L.J.


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## Maria Romana (Jun 7, 2010)

Well, I've now read all three first chapters, and I think they're all equally good.  Those are serious hooks--a surprising amount of characterization in just a handful of paragraphs, with just a hint of backstory, and course, a nail-biting ending.  I can see why your books have been so popular.


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## OliverCrommer (May 17, 2010)

I'll play too.

This is the first chapter of "A Phantom Love Story."

http://jasonwchan.webs.com/apps/blog/


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## Victoria lane &amp; R.T. Fox (Nov 10, 2009)

Try a sample or look inside of Somwomana by Victoria Lane , Or Shattered Images. At this point anything is good. Sorry my link is not working


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## rcordiner (Jul 4, 2010)

I'm game ...


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## ReeseReed (Dec 5, 2009)

I'm in!

http://www.amazon.com/Childproofed-ebook/dp/B002WYJQCU/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&m=AG56TWVU5XWC2&s=digital-text&qid=1280636203&sr=1-1


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## 13893 (Apr 29, 2010)

Here's my first chapter https://www.smashwords.com/books/view/19683. It's on Smashwords, so you can get whatever format you like, or read it on line.

Fun!


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## John Brinling (Jul 25, 2010)

TheGhostOfAFlea said:


> I like the idea and I'll be your first guinea pig.
> 
> My Kindle book is titled: The Ghost Of A Flea
> Author: John Brinling
> ...


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