# I just...I feel so proud!



## David &#039;Half-Orc&#039; Dalglish (Feb 1, 2010)

I'm sure plenty of you remember that crazy website most likely ran by a guy who was accusing people of fake reviews because of an inside report on Fiverr? Big kerfuffle for a bit, grumblings of lawsuits, etc? Well, he put out an update today, calling out three people specifically (I don't want to link to it, since you know, troll feeding, but google for "Thumbs Down Author List" if you reeeeeally want to). But at the top, of the big three, right up there with HH...there's this:



> David Dalglish - David Dalglish has the dubious distinction of quite possibly being the most hateful author alive as he regularly purchases reviews to trash other authors.


I want this as a button. Or maybe in my signature. Ooh, ooh, how about instead of "I tell stories" beneath my pic on kboards, it says "The Most Hateful Author Alive"? Maybe I should put it on my covers...

Oh, and like, half of the indie world also buys fake reviews, too, but that's totally irrelevant to the actual fun part of the post.


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## Rin (Apr 25, 2011)

People love a good villain.


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## robertduperre (Jun 13, 2010)

You my friend, are the very definition of a man born out of wedlock. *sigh* So disappointed. How dare you?!?!?!


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## Kenneth Rosenberg (Dec 3, 2010)

Ouch.  Oh well.  Congratulations?  You're number one, you're number one!


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## David &#039;Half-Orc&#039; Dalglish (Feb 1, 2010)

robertduperre said:


> You my friend, are the very definition of a man born out of wedlock. *sigh* So disappointed. How dare you?!?!?!


It was only supposed to be *your* books they tagged. I mean, how else could I get your self-esteem low enough to accept enslavement in my writing dungeon co-author several novels with me?


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## Not Here (May 23, 2011)

Nice. Most Hateful Author Alive would certainly be a fun t-shirt to wear at conventions.


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## Dee Ernst (Jan 10, 2011)

We all need bumper stickers "I'm Dubiously Distinctive"


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## ToniD (May 3, 2011)

Are you twirling your moustache with an evil laugh...


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## David &#039;Half-Orc&#039; Dalglish (Feb 1, 2010)

ToniD said:


> Are you twirling your moustache with an evil laugh...


I'm more like the emperor in his chair at the end of Return of the Jedi.

"Goood. Gooooood. Embrace your anger, boy!" - Dubious Emperor David.


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## JTCochrane (Feb 6, 2012)

David 'Half-Orc' Dalglish said:


> I'm more like the emperor in his chair at the end of Return of the Jedi.
> 
> "Goood. Gooooood. Embrace your anger, boy!" - Dubious Emperor David.


I was picturing more of Brain from Pinky and the Brain. "The same thing I do every night. Try to take over the world...one review at a time."


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## Pnjw (Apr 24, 2011)

David 'Half-Orc' Dalglish said:


> "The Most Hateful Author Alive"? Maybe I should put it on my covers...


Two enthusiastic thumbs up.


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## Sarah M (Apr 6, 2013)

I don't know. It could be so much better written hatred. It's like he wasn't even trying.  

"David Dalglish's seething hatred rolls off him in waves of loathing and disgust, paralyzing all that cross his path with disdainful glances and a well-timed cutting word. The man's utter rottenness has earned him the distinction of being the most hateful of all hateful authors that have ever been hateful."


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## jackz4000 (May 15, 2011)

Well ya made the grade lad and in good company. Maybe he'll do an expose too?


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## DashaGLogan (Jan 30, 2014)

Can I buy about 100 5* second hand?
I would love to be as hateful as you.


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## JeanneM (Mar 21, 2011)

Aw...it's so nice to see that the GR bullies have found a new hobby. I was so worried what would happen to them after Amazon cleaned up the site. Speaking of which, I wonder how Amazon would feel about a blog being named after them?

I'm so sorry David. It ain't easy being half-green.  

Hopefully someone will put a stop to this soon. And for the record, I doubt whether anyone believes it. Anyone with two brain cells to rub together, anyway.


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## Cege Smith (Dec 11, 2011)

I did actually see that. 

Ironically, I did a Google search on my name today to see if there were any new reviews posted recently on anyone's blog site, and came across said site (page 8 of the the search results on my name). Somehow I managed to get on the list as well. I also found myself mentioned on a blog post from August because I reviewed another indie author's book on Goodreads and the fellow called it out as a fake review. 

ETA- I don't want to feed the trolls either, but I'm a bit upset by it. I'm like tiny potatoes in the grand scheme of indie things, and I don't like being associated with this kind of vitriol in any way, shape, or form because I do feel like it could affect my reputation and sales if someone did take it worth a grain of salt. If he's freely naming names like the ones he is, and these are the BIG names, and they can't stop him, how could someone like me do anything?


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## PhoenixS (Apr 5, 2011)

Wait ... shouldn't this go in the anti-self-promotion thread?! Also, *jealous* - you're always hanging with the hateful, cool kids.


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## Pnjw (Apr 24, 2011)

SM Reine said:


> What do I have to do to be the most hateful author alive? Sniffle.


I think you need to tie someone up in your author dungeon.


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## Edward W. Robertson (May 18, 2010)

cegesmith said:


> I did actually see that.
> 
> Ironically, I did a Google search on my name today to see if there were any new reviews posted recently on anyone's blog site, and came across said site (page 8 of the the search results on my name). Somehow I managed to get on the list as well. I also found myself mentioned on a blog post from August because I reviewed another indie author's book on Goodreads and the fellow called it out as a fake review.
> 
> ETA- I don't want to feed the trolls either, but I'm a bit upset by it. I'm like tiny potatoes in the grand scheme of indie things, and I don't like being associated with this kind of vitriol in any way, shape, or form because I do feel like it could affect my reputation and sales if someone did take it worth a grain of salt. If he's freely naming names like the ones he is, and these are the BIG names, and they can't stop him, how could someone like me do anything?


It's got to be zero fun being accused of something like that. Especially when it's difficult if not impossible to prove otherwise. But the very fact so many big authors have been accused, and so clearly haven't done anything wrong, should make it clear to all right-thinking people how ridiculous these claims are.


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## ElHawk (Aug 13, 2012)

Hahahaha!

There is nothing dubious about that distinction.


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## Cege Smith (Dec 11, 2011)

Edward W. Robertson said:


> It's got to be zero fun being accused of something like that. Especially when it's difficult if not impossible to prove otherwise. But the very fact so many big authors have been accused, and so clearly haven't done anything wrong, should make it clear to all right-thinking people how ridiculous these claims are.


Thanks, Ed. My logical part says exactly the same thing. I read several of the posts there and found them absurd. But then there's the emotional part of me that got upset by it. I know there's zero I can do about it, so I just need to let it go.

I do appreciate seeing David attach humor to it- I will grow up to be like him someday.


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## RichardWolanski (Jan 20, 2014)

Definitely plaque worthy!


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## Edward W. Robertson (May 18, 2010)

cegesmith said:


> Thanks, Ed. My logical part says exactly the same thing. I read several of the posts there and found them absurd. But then there's the emotional part of me that got upset by it. I know there's zero I can do about it, so I just need to let it go.
> 
> I do appreciate seeing David attach humor to it- I will grow up to be like him someday.


Well, unlike the rest of it, in David's case, the accusations happen to be 100% true. That guy is like the Plankton of self-publishing.


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## Monique (Jul 31, 2010)

Edward W. Robertson said:


> Well, unlike the rest of it, in David's case, the accusations happen to be 100% true. That guy is like the Plankton of self-publishing.


LMAO!


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## redacted (Dec 16, 2013)

David 'Half-Orc' Dalglish said:


> I'm sure plenty of you remember that crazy website most likely ran by a crazy guy who was accusing people of fake reviews because of an inside report on Fiverr? Big kerfuffle for a bit, grumblings of lawsuits, etc? Well, he put out an update today, calling out three people specifically (I don't want to link to it, since you know, troll feeding, but google for "Thumbs Down Author List" if you reeeeeally want to). But at the top, of the big three, right up there with HH...there's this:
> 
> I want this as a button. Or maybe in my signature. Ooh, ooh, how about instead of "I tell stories" beneath my pic on kboards, it says "The Most Hateful Author Alive"? Maybe I should put it on my covers...
> 
> Oh, and like, half of the indie world also buys fake reviews, too, but that's totally irrelevant to the actual fun part of the post.


Wow. Others only got on a list, but he gave you your own PARAGRAPH. You're big time, man.


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## David &#039;Half-Orc&#039; Dalglish (Feb 1, 2010)

SM Reine said:


> Okay, done. What next?
> 
> The cover just isn't ready yet. It still doesn't quite express my ~vision~.


Hey, hey, hey hey hey. No. Noooooo. Bad. Don't you steal my title from me already. I've not even had 24 hours to gloat yet. Don't make me sick my massive horde of 1-star trolls after you.

Er. I mean.



Edward W. Robertson said:


> Well, unlike the rest of it, in David's case, the accusations happen to be 100% true. That guy is like the Plankton of self-publishing.


How could you not love Plankton?










Look at that face. Look at it. Admit it. You want to squeeze his cheeks. That's me, that's how my readers think of me, all of them. As I kill their favorite characters.


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## CDForness (Nov 25, 2013)

So this is more or less negative SEO. Can't you guys sick a lawyer on him?  I think he would have an obligation to prove his accusations.


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## David &#039;Half-Orc&#039; Dalglish (Feb 1, 2010)

CDF said:


> So this is more or less negative SEO. Can't you guys sick a lawyer on him? I think he would have an obligation to prove his accusations.


Pfft. I'm, uh, not thinking it'd be worth the teeniest amount of effort. Besides, better someone find that than, um, some of the actual legitimate blog posts about yours truly, and possible quality of my work...


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## Al Dente (Sep 3, 2012)

I'm never considered successful enough to be on the "big bad meanie head" list.


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## Edward W. Robertson (May 18, 2010)

David 'Half-Orc' Dalglish said:


> Look at that face. Look at it. Admit it. You want to squeeze his cheeks. That's me, that's how my readers think of me, all of them. As I kill their favorite characters.


Yes, exactly. Your books are "fun," right? As in, "F is for Fire that burns down the whole empire! U is for Undead.. army! N is for No survi-yi-vors!"


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## CDForness (Nov 25, 2013)

David 'Half-Orc' Dalglish said:


> Pfft. I'm, uh, not thinking it'd be worth the teeniest amount of effort. Besides, better someone find that than, um, some of the actual legitimate blog posts about yours truly, and possible quality of my work...


That's not very hateful. I'm beginning to think you're not as hateful as some bloggers with crappy free blogs are saying. In fact it occurs to me that you are perhaps paying bloggers to crown you most hateful. I used to look up to you in matters of hatefulness. Now I'm not sure what to believe. Are there any authentic haters out there anymore? Or did that die with the dawning of the interwebz?


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## BTackitt (Dec 15, 2008)

*true story about David's writing. Book 2 of the half-orcs made me cry and feel so bad it took me 6 months before I would touch book 3.


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## Gertie Kindle (Nov 6, 2008)

It used to be your title of Pizza Hut Manager that was the proudest moment of your life and now this tops even that milestone. How can you stand the fame, the glory, and still be a regular half-orc?

I'm so happy for you, David. I'm just choking up, here.


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## CDForness (Nov 25, 2013)

BTackitt said:


> *true story about David's writing. Book 2 of the half-orcs made me cry and feel so bad it took me 6 months before I would touch book 3.


Now that sounds like the guy crowned most hateful

ETA: unless he paid you to make that comment


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## Al Dente (Sep 3, 2012)

I'll bet Manowar wrote this song just for Dalglish:


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## Dave Dykema (May 18, 2009)

Gertie Kindle 'a/k/a Margaret Lake' said:


> It used to be your title of Pizza Hut Manager that was the proudest moment of your life and now this tops even that milestone. How can you stand the fame, the glory, and still be a regular half-orc?
> 
> I'm so happy for you, David. I'm just choking up, here.


The Pizza Hut days! I had forgotten about those...


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## Carol (was Dara) (Feb 19, 2011)

> David Dalglish has the dubious distinction of quite possibly being the most hateful author alive as he regularly purchases reviews to trash other authors.


I wondered where all my bad reviews were coming from! David, how could you?!


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## Christa Wick (Nov 1, 2012)

SM Reine said:


> What do I have to do to be the most hateful author alive? Sniffle.


Aim higher, beautiful. I know you can do it. 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=spHEw2n9LwE


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## Usedtoposthere (Nov 19, 2013)

Goodness, you HAVE been a bad boy, haven't you?

Sigh, I'm still over here at the Band Geek table.


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## JRTomlin (Jan 18, 2011)

Huh. Those fake reviewers sure must be making buckets of money selling that many reviews.


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## Archer (Apr 25, 2009)

AHA! So YOU'RE the one! 
(I knew it all along...)


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## jnfr (Mar 26, 2011)

BTackitt said:


> *true story about David's writing. Book 2 of the half-orcs made me cry and feel so bad it took me 6 months before I would touch book 3.


David, you s**wflake!


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## Betsy the Quilter (Oct 27, 2008)

There's a simple reason for David's winning the title:










Betsy


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## Carol (was Dara) (Feb 19, 2011)

Ah, so you're saying it's a beauty contest, Betsy?


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## KellyHarper (Jul 29, 2012)

SM Reine said:


> What do I have to do to be the most hateful author alive? Sniffle.


Human treadmill desk. I'll let your imagination fill in the logistical details.


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## Usedtoposthere (Nov 19, 2013)

Betsy the Quilter said:


> There's a simple reason for David's winning the title:
> 
> 
> 
> ...


OK, that violated the Terms of Something. The Terms of My Eyeballs.


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## Gertie Kindle (Nov 6, 2008)

David, I had no idea you were so ... so ... studly!


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## Becca Mills (Apr 27, 2012)

Rosalind James said:


> OK, that violated the Terms of Something. The Terms of My Eyeballs.


Seriously. I think Betsy just displaced David as most hateful.


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## Carol (was Dara) (Feb 19, 2011)

ROFL My dog wants to know why I'm laughing so hard I'm crying.


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## Betsy the Quilter (Oct 27, 2008)

My work here is done.


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## jnfr (Mar 26, 2011)

My head is ringing.


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## Nathalie Aynie (Nov 24, 2013)

Two things:

I *KNEW* that was you, all those one-stars on my WiP. It couldn't possibly be because I suck, because I'm awesome.
Plankton has stolen SM Reine's cheeks!!


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## Mark E. Cooper (May 29, 2011)

Rin said:


> People love a good villain.


Well, he has the right kind of beard. It's obviously that.


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## Jeroen Steenbeeke (Feb 3, 2012)

David, I want the three minutes I spent looking at that blog back. Then again, you did warn us.

Either way, I love how you're handling this.


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## O (Jul 15, 2013)

I'm extremely wary of saying anything on this thread that could be taken out of context and misconstrued as jealousy of the 'hateful crown'. So I'll just say Congratulations to David and well done.

Apropos of nothing, no, nothing at all, I'd like to mention that in my next book, one of my characters shall be having a cute-kitten smoothie and some adorable puppies on toast for breakfast in chapter five.

*rubs hands with glee*

_Then _we shall see who wears the black moustache around here.


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## vrabinec (May 19, 2011)

What now, Dalglish? Am I supposed to stop writing the nasty reviews? You ain't getting your money back, man.


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## Gennita Low (Dec 13, 2012)

Oh. My. Gawd.

My coffeeless brain can't process Emperor David's Poster of Hate.

I think I need that picture ironed on one of my roofing teeshirts.



Betsy the Quilter said:


> There's a simple reason for David's winning the title:
> 
> 
> 
> ...


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## David &#039;Half-Orc&#039; Dalglish (Feb 1, 2010)

vrabinec said:


> What now, Dalglish? Am I supposed to stop writing the nasty reviews? You ain't getting your money back, man.


Well clearly you didn't do a good enough job hiding it, so I'm not sure why you think you deserve the money...


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## Hugh Howey (Feb 11, 2012)

Don't you write books where they kill trolls?

I think they might regret picking on you!


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## vrabinec (May 19, 2011)

I'm curious where the [expletive] they think you guys got the money to pay all those minions BEFORE you got big in order to become big.


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## jackz4000 (May 15, 2011)

Betsy the Quilter said:


> There's a simple reason for David's winning the title:
> 
> 
> 
> ...


Oh Betsy my eyes hurt...my head aches. I thought I'd never have to see that photo again and you pull it up from the archival depths. Burn it.


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## Wayne Stinnett (Feb 5, 2014)

Excuse my naivete. You can buy reviews? Hell, wish I'd known that a year ago.


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## David &#039;Half-Orc&#039; Dalglish (Feb 1, 2010)

Wayne Stinnett said:


> Excuse my naivete. You can buy reviews? Hell, wish I'd known that a year ago.


That's what my agent said when he saw this article.

"You know, maybe you should have them write fake reviews for your own books instead of trashing others..."


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## Redacted1111 (Oct 26, 2013)

Why am I always left out of the evil review hate cabals. It isn't fair.


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## BTackitt (Dec 15, 2008)

I just googled David's Minions, and this is what came up.









If they are writing reviews, how can anyone tell if they are good or bad?
"Poppoy! Bello, banana! Banana, Banana!"


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## vrabinec (May 19, 2011)

BTackitt said:


> I just googled David's Minions, and this is what came up.
> 
> 
> 
> ...


 

Yup, that's the first thing that comes to mind whenever anyone mentions minions. Best movie EVER!


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## ElHawk (Aug 13, 2012)

ALL HAIL ZARDOZ!


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## JumpingShip (Jun 3, 2010)

David Scroggins said:


> I'm never considered successful enough to be on the "big bad meanie head" list.


Me neither. 

Hey, who wants to trade reviews or make some big bucks writing reviews for my books? I want to be on _somebody's_ list.  Kidding!


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## Lynn McNamee (Jan 8, 2009)

Hey, David.

Remember when I ran Red Adept Reviews and reviewed your book. Yeah, I gave it 5 stars.

Can I have my money now?  







*Note: I would like to state for the record that David Dalglish never paid for any of the reviews on RAR. He never even offered to pay. Heck, he didn't even send chocolates. Just sayin'...


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## Usedtoposthere (Nov 19, 2013)

Does this mean I get to assume that all my one-star reviewers are actually David's Minions?

I'm totally loving this idea!


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