# TATTERDEMON - a full length novel of pure scarecrow terror - now only 99cents



## Steve Vernon (Feb 18, 2011)

For those of you who folks who are hankering - and I know there are SOME of you out there on account of I can hear you hankering in the dark - for a fine, fat, full-length novel of scarecrows and unimaginable terror with a sprinkling of witchcraft, voodoo and power mowers thrown into the mix - then why not pick up a copy of my brand new novel TATTERDEMON.

Actually, TATTERDEMON has had a new cover for a while now. Here's the new cover for those folks who are looking at the thread for the first time.


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## Ann in Arlington (Oct 27, 2008)

Steve. . . . .

Congratulations on the book! 

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## Steve Vernon (Feb 18, 2011)

Thanks, Ann.


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## Steve Vernon (Feb 18, 2011)

> "Steve Vernon is one of those authors, that brings a big smile to my face every time I hear he has a new book out. He is also one of those authors that fully understands that the heart of a good book is a good story. He is a master of story teller, filling his story with brilliant characters and equally brilliant, and realistic dialogue." - The Ginger Nuts of Horror





> "This genre needs new blood and Steve Vernon is quite a transfusion." - Ed Lee





> "Steve Vernon was born to write. He's the real deal and we're lucky to have him." - Richard Chizmar, publisher/owner/creator of Cemetery Dance Magazine





> "Buy my boy's books!" - Mom


Download TATTERDEMON today! http://www.amazon.com/TATTERDEMON-ebook/dp/B0081UEXPE/ref=la_B002BMD282_1_4?ie=UTF8&qid=1338285531&sr=1-4


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## Steve Vernon (Feb 18, 2011)




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## Steve Vernon (Feb 18, 2011)

Why not pick up a copy today?


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## Steve Vernon (Feb 18, 2011)

It is hot here in Halifax.

Hot enough to make the trees yearn for weak-bladdered hound dogs.

The paint is peeling off of the walls.

My armpits reek of nine day old moose meat, left too long in the sun.

Why not cool off with a real cool read.

Here's what one reviewer had to say about TATTERDEMON!
http://wistfulskimmiesbookreviews.blogspot.ca/2012/06/tatterdemon-by-steve-vernon.html

Pick up a copy today!


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## Steve Vernon (Feb 18, 2011)

Tatterdemon is a book for those folks who did not take the blue pill.

Pick up a copy today, Mr. Anderson...


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## Steve Vernon (Feb 18, 2011)

Why don't you just sit down and read a great big monstrous scarecrow-ridden horror novel while you wait for the Summer Olympics to play out?


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## Steve Vernon (Feb 18, 2011)

HA! But I switched the pill. And painted it!


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## Steve Vernon (Feb 18, 2011)

Mmmm, spongy...


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## Steve Vernon (Feb 18, 2011)

I'm looking outside of my office window. It's gray out there. The kind of day that a poet would call "ominous".

I just clocked 2000 more words on my next manuscript. It is a real crackerjack of a novel and I'm pretty excited with how it is developing - but it's going to be a month or so before it is finished.

So I guess I'm feeling a little "ominous" myself.

Do you ever have days like that? Days when you feel yourself dangling?

(and man, I hate dangling)

Buy yourself a copy of TATTERDEMON today. I guarantee a thrill-ride that will blow the gorilla-funk from out of your system. You'll howl at the moon in broad daylight, run for hours and chase every fire hydrant in the city.

Booyah!


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## Steve Vernon (Feb 18, 2011)

Not a whole lot to say this morning - beyond that there is a brand new review of TATTERDEMON over at Toronto-based horror web site THE HORROR BOOTH.

Come check it out.

http://thehorrorbooth.com/2012/09/04/book-review-tatterdemon-by-steve-vernon/

If you have a minute why not leave a comment on the blog page. These bloggers are us indie writers lifeblood and they really appreciate hearing frrom us now and again.

(410)


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## Steve Vernon (Feb 18, 2011)

If you are looking for a giggle - why don't you take a swing through my latest blog entry - and see if you can spot the TATTERDEMON sales pitch that I have skilfully inserted into the entry.

http://stevevernonstoryteller.wordpress.com/2012/09/29/the-secret-behind-a-strong-first-line/


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## Steve Vernon (Feb 18, 2011)

Help.

I have painted myself into a corner. I've been making it a point to come up with wildly creative comments on these Book Bazaar threads of mine - but lately I just can't think of anything to say. I have "Thread-Block". 

Give now to the NATIONAL FIGHT THREAD BLOCK FOUNDATION and support North America's fight against this crushing condition.

How about starting by buying a copy of TATTERDEMON? Worse comes to worse, you can always stick this e-book out in the corn field and see if it scares away the crows!!!


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## Betsy the Quilter (Oct 27, 2008)

You should think up things while riding to work in cubicle-land, Steve.


Betsy


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## Steve Vernon (Feb 18, 2011)

I dig Halloween.

Today I'm pretty busy. I'm heading to work shortly for a day shift, following which I will head to a local radio station to tell ghost stories and then I will hotfoot it home to hand out goodies to the kiddies.

If you are looking for a PERFECT Halloween treat why not pick up a copy of TATTERDEMON today?


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## Steve Vernon (Feb 18, 2011)

I'm hungry and I need coffee and I haven't had breakfast yet - and you want me to be funny

All right. All right. In the words of Norman Bates - let me take a stab at this.

What do STEVE VERNON and a WITCH-CONJURED SCARECROW have in common?

Both are outstanding in their field!!!

All right.

That joke was so lame you ought to e-mail me a pair of crutches for it.

My cat says nobody cracks a cat food can like I can...no-freaking-body!!!

Buy my book, durn it.


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## Steve Vernon (Feb 18, 2011)

Why don't you install this monstrously huge novel into your brain cells. A fine fat tale of scarecrow horror - scenes in this one that you would imagine - this ain't your usual scarecrow novel.

TATTERDEMON!

If your blood don't run cold it's probably a hot flash!
http://www.amazon.com/dp/B0081UEXPE/?tag=kbpst-20


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## Steve Vernon (Feb 18, 2011)

Attention. Attention. I would like to post the longest piece of creative spam to ever appear upon the Kindleboards Forum today.

(someone call up the Guinness Foundation and ask them to send me a cold one...)

So - what will I spam?

Well, I've got some beans in the refrigerator. Spam does go AWFULLY good with beans. But I don't have a tin of Spam - and I don't feel like stomping out through the blizzard to buy myself a tin of Spam at the grocery - and besides, I'm pretty certain that Robin isn't REALLY talking about that high-caloric greasy-sweet salted-to-perfection pack-the-clotted-fat-around-your-arteries-and-wait-to-die goodness that men call SPAM.

Naw, she's talking about the phrase that we Facebook Group followers have come to fear and loathe...BUY MY BOOK!

But hey - it's Spam-it-up Friday - and I REALLY want to tell you about this book I wrote.

I really do. I'm going to burst if I don't tell it to you.

Don't make me burst on you!

The book is called TATTERDEMON.

All right - so it isn't FREE.

It isn't even CHEAP.

But it is nearly 400 pages cram-pack-loaded with pure scarecrow entertainment.

It is a wild exciting no-holds-barred hayride through a field of indescribable horror.

So let me try and describe it to you!

Imagine you've just killed your husband. Your loud-mouth bullying abusive husband. What, you're a guy? Work with me. Imagine you're a woman and you've just killed your husband - on account of the man was really just too mean and stupid to let live for moment longer.

Only problem is, you've gone and buried him in a field that is cursed by a witch who was unjustly murdered and buried in that very same field - THREE HUNDRED YEARS AGO!

Now - anyone who has ever read a horror novel or seen a horror movie KNOWS damn well that if you go and execute and bury somebody unjustly - well, sooner or later they're going to come back at you. We're talking rise up from the dead - and before you get to squawking something along the lines of "OH MY DEAR-DYING-GOD not another spud-stomping zombie novel! Somebody kill me and raise me back up and kill me again before I read another word!" - think again.

This isn't your granddaddy's zombie novel.

This isn't a zombie novel AT ALL!

It's scarecrows.

Got it?

So what if that husband - we'll call him Vic, on account of that's what his name is - rises up from the dead? Along with the spirit of your father - the same one that your mother killed for reasons of her own - rises up in spirit-form along with Vic? What if that witch comes back and what if everything that was EVER killed or buried or just-plain-died in that field starts coming back?

Then you throw into that mix a couple of spree-killing convicts, a voodoo-practicing sheriff's deputy, a peeping-tom postal worker, an anorexic ex-circus fat woman, a sheriff who has got a secret hidden in his downstairs freezer, a broken-hearted ex-marine trucker who is terrified of his ex-wife and Earl Toad - the world's shortest action hero and things REALLY begin to heat up.

Well - things are just naturally bound to get exciting - now aren't they?

Now - be honest with yourself - if you find yourself the least bit intrigued by this description - or even the least bit amused by this cathartic rant of pure undiluted liquid Spam - (now there's a concept!) - or even the least bit sorry for my poor rusted out backbone that is going be tested by another bout of snow-shoveling later today or possibly even tonight - why don't you give in to the spirits of Spam Almighty and go and buy yourself a copy of this here e-book.

It's available on Kindle.

You can also hunt it up on Kobo.

The damn book has been sunk beneath the radar and I could REALLY use a burst of sales right about now to kickstart this puppy into going viral - SO SHARE THIS POSTING AND GO AND BUY YOURSELF A COPY OF TATTERDEMON today!

http://www.amazon.com/TATTERDEMON-ebook/dp/B0081UEXPE

It is also available on Kobo for all of you wonderful Kobo wielders!

http://www.kobobooks.com/ebook/Tatterdemon/book-2UgrygnVeCN47XmyEKZQ/page1.html?s=vmkj5EeFhU-dYopTQyQ8kA&r=1


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## Steve Vernon (Feb 18, 2011)

Dang.

How do I top that last entry?

I can't.

So just take it from me - pick up this fine fat novel of scarecrow horror and I guarantee I won't be disappointed.

Did that come out the way I thought it did


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## Steve Vernon (Feb 18, 2011)

So I offered my scarecrow a sandwich and he said "No thanks - I'm stuffed."

So I went inside and my teddy bear said the same darned thing.

Man - I really need to hire me a better gag writer...


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## Steve Vernon (Feb 18, 2011)

Okay - so my wife has NEVER read TATTERDEMON.

She's reading it now.

Maybe six chapters in and she just SHRIEKED out loud.

Folks, you REALLY ought to pick up a copy today!

(note: just between you and me the price for TATTERDEMON is a mere $3.99 but I'll be bumping it up to $6.99 by the end of the month. Don't tell me you were never warned.)


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## Steve Vernon (Feb 18, 2011)

There's a brand new review of TATTERDEMON over at THE READER'S HOLLOW.

http://thereadershollow.wordpress.com/2013/07/24/the-tatterdemon-omnibus-review/


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## Steve Vernon (Feb 18, 2011)

It's been a while since I've talked about this one.

What can I tell you?

Well - if you LOVED Salems Lot you are REALLY going to dig TATTERDEMON.

Pick up a copy today!


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## Steve Vernon (Feb 18, 2011)

Okay - so this is Friday 13th and I have a day-long special.

ELEVEN of my e-books are now available for 99cents.

I will be posting them throughout the morning - but if you can't wait for me to tell you which ones are on sale here is the list.

Tatterdemon - usual price $3.99 - now 99 cents
Devil Tree - usual price $3.99 - now 99 cents
Gypsy Blood - usual price $3.99 - now 99 cents
Rueful Regret - usual price $1.99 - now 99 cents
Long Horn, Big Shaggy - usual price $2.99 - now 99 cents
Bad Valentines - usual price $1.99 - now 99 cents
Roadside Ghosts - usual price $2.99 - now 99 cents
Two Fisted Nasty - usual price $2.99 - now 99 cents
Nothing To Lose - usual price $2.99 - now 99 cents
Nothing Down - usual price $2.99 - now 99 cents
Sudden Death Overtime - usual price $2.99 - now 99 cents

The best savings - by far is TATTERDEMON - a fine, fat full-length novel of scarecrow terror - just perfect for autumnal reading. If you dig old-school Stephen King - (think Salems Lot) - then you will DEFINITELY enjoy TATTERDEMON.

You don't believe me - just hit the link and take a look at the LOOK-INSIDE-THE-BOOK and have yourself a quick peek.

And here's a review link. http://www.mindoftatlock.com/2013/09/tatterdemon-book-review.html

I'd really LOVE to see this book get noticed and read by a lot more readers - in fact - if you don't buy any other of my books today - DO ME A FAVOR AND BUY THIS ONE NOW!

Thanks!


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## Steve Vernon (Feb 18, 2011)

When you post a thread on Kboards you are talking to BOTH writers and readers - and sometimes you're talking to both!

So let me talk to the readers first.

If you're looking for a rock-solid oh-my-golly-the-town-is=seething-with-scarecrows horror you REALLY ought to pick this book up.

If you dug the living hoopdoodle out of Stephen King's SALEMS LOT - you REALLY ought to pick this book up.

If you were a fan of Peter Jackson's early zombie masterpiece DEAD ALIVE - you REALLY-FREAKING ought to pick a copy of this book up.

***

Now, let me speak to the writers of Kboards.

I made the mistake to invite an actor to an outdoor lunch party two summers back. The man couldn't speak unless he was standing somewhere PROMINENT. He'd stand up on the railing of the deck, he'd stand on the buffet table, he'd stand on the roof - anywhere that he could be seen.

Indie writers can be the exact same way.

We are ALWAYS attempting to improve our visibility over at Amazon.

Last week I had a big Friday 13th promotion. This week I have launched my first Book Blast promotion. 

All kidding aside I am doing my very best to raise the sales numbers, the ranking - and ultimately the visibility of my full length novel, TATTERDEMON.

So once again, for today TATTERDEMON is available for a mere 99 cents - down from it's usual price of $2.99.

As I type the book is sitting at an Amazon.com sales rank of 54,675.

I'll let you know where it is sitting at the end of the day. 


ADDED AT THE END OF THE DAY.

#7,965 Paid in Kindle Store 

#58 in Kindle Store > Kindle eBooks > Literature & Fiction > Genre Fiction > Horror > Occult
#69 in Books > Literature & Fiction > Genre Fiction > Horror > Occult


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## Steve Vernon (Feb 18, 2011)

Okay, so I promised someone over on Facebook book a Spam recipe and rather than trying to cram it all into one of their dinky little comment blocks I decided that I would write it out here in full and then link to them over there.

This is nothing more than a derivative of my world-famous He-Man Beans recipe which dukes, emperors and the occasional Earl have written and asked me about.

It starts out with a fry pan.

There are very few problems in life that cannot be solved with a frypan. Heck, if all of the world leaders sat down around a wood stove with a fry pan full of my he-man beans you bet you not a single one of them fellows would be able to spell W - A - R.

Chop up a fat old onion.

You ought to sing while you are chopping but not so loudly that you will accidentally cut a finger off but if you do happen to inadvertently lop your pinkie don't worry, that's just a little more protein for the fry pan.

I like to chop a green pepper and some celery and a green apple while I am at it. A red apple or a red pepper will do just fine as well although red apples are generally considered food for wusses.

Dump all of this chop-up into a big bowl. You should ALWAYS have your chopping done ahead of time or else risk the generation of a little more protein for that fry pan.

If you see any fruit flies just shoot them but aim straight. Bullet holes in the cooking cupboards is a total social faux-pas.

Go to the can cupboard and find yourself a tin of Spam and a tin of beans. Maybe even two tins of beans if you are feeding more than yourself.

If you don't have a tin of beans OR a tin of Spam in your can cupboard you probably ought to find that fruit fly pistol and shoot yourself with it two or three times.

There are limits, man.

Women have limits, too - only they call them restraining orders.

Now open up all of the tins with a can opener or a hatchet if you don't have a can opener handy - only I recommend using someone else to hold the tin while you swing your hatchet - like maybe a pet monkey or a well-trained dog.

Chunk up the Spam into a separate bowl or a plate if you have shot all of the fruit flies.

Put the fry pan on the burner.

Turn the sucker up HOT.

Then, when the fry pan is hot drizzle a little olive oil on the fry pan to make it sizzle.

Throw in the onions. It is a fact of life that onions ALWAYS ought to be fried first. They smell sweet and can actually attract wayward women if the wind is blowing in the proper direction.

Then lump in the Spam and start stirring around with a big fat old wooden spoon.

You don't have a spoon?

Start thinking about that gun again.

Then add whatever else you have chopped up and stir it like you have caught a religious fever.

Sing to your fry pan while you are stirring. You need to have a good frying song. I favor Volare sung in the key of Dean Martin.

It will bring them wayward women just flocking to you.

When everything is nicely sizzling in the pan open a beer unless it is breakfast time at which you will have to make do with good strong coffee unless it is Sunday and the Lord is not looking in which case you still might opt for beer.

If you haven,t got beer or coffee I will again refer you to that gun.

Dump the beans into the fry pan and turn the heat down a little and try for a heroic he-man pose if anyone is looking and even if they aren’t looking those wayward women might show up at any moment time so it wouldn’t hurt you to throw in a pose just the same.

Finally, slather a little butter onto some fresh bread and heap those Spam and beans onto a big metal plate. Find a fork or a spoon and dig in.

Yodel, if you must.

If I had time I would tell you how to make bannock which goes awfully good with he-man beans but I will save that for another day.

And, speaking of spam...

If you have not picked up a copy of TATTERDEMON go and grab it now.

It isn't as nourishing as this recipe is but it will keep you busier for a whole lot longer.


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## Steve Vernon (Feb 18, 2011)

Remember - TATTERDEMON is on sale for 99 cents for the rest of the month.

And why not swing on over to the Kboards Book Corner and tell us what your favorite horror novel is
http://www.kboards.com/index.php/topic,164647.0.html


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## Steve Vernon (Feb 18, 2011)

It's nearly Halloween.

This is the PERFECT time of year to pick up a copy I will be upping the price of the book back to its usual 99 cents. Why wait any longer? Grab a copy of Tatterdemon at the low, low, low price of 99 measly cents!


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## Steve Vernon (Feb 18, 2011)

There's a brand new review of TATTERDEMON at A Reader's Review!

http://areadersreviewblog.com/2013/10/31/tatterdemon-by-steve-vernon-halloween-horror/

I've left the book at 99 cents for now.


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## Steve Vernon (Feb 18, 2011)

It just so happens that TATTERDEMON was selected as one of the TOP READS OF 2013 by A READER'S REVIEW BLOG.

http://areadersreviewblog.com/2013/12/19/carolines-top-reads-of-2013/

Why don't you kill two birds with one single well-flung stone and buy both you and me a Christmas gift - just by purchasing a copy of TATTERDEMON.

You get a guaranteed great read - and I truly DO guarantee it - and I get a fistful of royalties.l

Dang - sounds like the title of my next book - A FIST FULL OF ROYALTIES - followed by the sequel A FEW ROYALTIES MORE!


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## Steve Vernon (Feb 18, 2011)

Want a bone-chilling read for a cold winter's night? 

Why not pick up a copy of TATTERDEMON today


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## Steve Vernon (Feb 18, 2011)

I should be writing - shouldn't I?


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## Steve Vernon (Feb 18, 2011)

Don't just stand there like a dummy - get on and order yourself a copy of TATTERDEMON today.

I guarantee you won't regret it.

http://www.amazon.com/Tatterdemon-Steve-Vernon-ebook/dp/B0081UEXPE/ref=pd_ybh_4


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## Steve Vernon (Feb 18, 2011)

In honor of the IDES OF MARCH - watch this!






If you giggled - just a little - buy a copy of my book today!


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## Steve Vernon (Feb 18, 2011)

Okay - so I mentioned a bannock recipe.

Bannock is easy. Some of you folks might have baked it on a stick over a campfire in Boy Scouts - or Girl Scouts.

Heck, some of you might have baked Boy AND Girl Scouts over a campfire - but we won't talk about that.

Just grab yourself one cup of flour, one pinch of salt, one pinch of baking powder, enough of a tin of beer to make a nice squeezy batter. Then smoosh it up with a spoon or your hands if you've recently washed. Load fist-sized balls of batter onto a baking sheet for 350 degrees Celsius and maybe about fifteen minutes or until they're golden-brown.

Smear on a little butter.

You have any leftovers add jam or honey or even peanut butter.

If all of the baking sheets are dirty then just deep fry those suckers or pan fry them if you are trying to watch your cholesterol. Or cook them over your fireplace on a stick or else wrap them in tin foil and do them on your barbecue.

It's a versatile bread, simple as all get-out, and folks will think that you actually know what you are doing.

Dig in, enjoy.

Now go and buy that copy of TATTERDEMON, would you?


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## Steve Vernon (Feb 18, 2011)

Okay - so I haven't talked about *TATTERDEMON* for almost a year.

Just wanted to tell you folks that it has been available for it's regular price of $2.99 for quite some time now - but I have marked it back down to 99 cents - which is pretty freaking awesome for 500 pages of pure scarecrow terror.

Why not pick up a copy today?


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## Steve Vernon (Feb 18, 2011)

Why not grab a copy of TATTERDEMON today - before I get around to bumping the price back up to $2.99 in June?

Here is the UK link for all of you folks across the pond.
http://www.amazon.co.uk/gp/product/B00RIH2L96


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## SidneyW (Aug 6, 2010)

I loved the Scarecrow of Romney Marsh. That theme song was cool to me when I was a kid.


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## Steve Vernon (Feb 18, 2011)

Scarecrow, scarecrow, the soldiers of the King feared his name...

I've had a bump in sales yesterday and today. Help me out and pick up a copy. I guarantee a mind-blowing read - somewhere along the lines of SALEM'S LOT with scarecrows - and you will NOT be disappointed!


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## Steve Vernon (Feb 18, 2011)

TATTERDEMON - outstanding in its field.

Go and pick up a copy today.


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## Steve Vernon (Feb 18, 2011)

For the rest of the month of October TATTERDEMON will be available from Kindle for a mere 99 cents.

Come November I will be bumping it back up to $3.99 - so grab this full-length novel of pure scarecrow terror while it's cheap!


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## Steve Vernon (Feb 18, 2011)

Okay, so it is my birthday this month and I have marked down almost ALL of my indie Kindle releases to 99 cents, including my bestselling horror novel TATTERDEMON.

Grab a copy today while it is cheap, cheap, cheap!

US - https://www.amazon.com/dp/B00RIH2L96
UK - https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/B00RIH2L96


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