# Another truly random question



## Geoffrey

leslieray's 'truly random question' thread had me thinking she was starting a random question game .... So, because that's what I'm sure she really had in mind, I thought I'd start it for her without muddying up her thread      ....

... no rules, just random questions ....


You gonna eat that?


----------



## leslieray

LOL,,yeah that really was my intention....well sorta, kinda?!?!?!?!


----------



## DenverRalphy

Why isn't 'phonetic' spelled like it sounds?


----------



## Addie

Why can't I have my cake and eat it too?


----------



## sjc

Why do birds fly?


----------



## Addie

Why can't penguins fly? Do the other birds mock them?


----------



## Alle Meine Entchen

How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood?


----------



## Ann in Arlington

How long is a piece of string?


----------



## Addie

Why would you set that on fire?


----------



## crebel

Are we going to get any answers?


----------



## leslieray

Is there really such a thing as getting eye cancer from reading on a backlit screen? 

Addie will know why I asked this one!


----------



## loonlover

Why do fat chance and slim chance have the same meaning?


----------



## Sofie

Why ask why?


----------



## Geoffrey

want to meet for cocktails later?


----------



## sjc

Sofie said:


> Why ask why?


Why not?


----------



## NogDog

Geoffrey said:


> You gonna eat that?


Yes.



crebel said:


> Are we going to get any answers?


Yes.



Geoffrey said:


> want to meet for cocktails later?


Yes.


----------



## leslieray

lol, nogdog!


----------



## Leslie

When a plane is landing, why is it called "the final approach"?

Why is the building called "the terminal"?


----------



## BTackitt

Can you be on Cloud 9 and in 7th Heaven at the same time?


----------



## NogDog

Why does none of these words rhyme with any of the others: tough, though, trough, through?


----------



## Anju 

What Fun!  But I can't think of a single one


----------



## BTackitt

Why?


----------



## Geoffrey

How you doin'?


----------



## sjc

> What Fun! But I can't think of a single one


I'll help you...
Who's glad Anju is back and feeling much better?


----------



## Alle Meine Entchen

a staple of traveling w/ kids:  Are we there yet?


----------



## Addie

leslieray said:


> Is there really such a thing as getting eye cancer from reading on a backlit screen?
> 
> Addie will know why I asked this one!


LOL

Who doesn't want eye cancer?


----------



## sjc

Alle Meine Entchen said:


> a staple of traveling w/ kids: Are we there yet?


Can we stop?...I need to go to the bathroom...
Didn't you go before we left the house?


----------



## Susan in VA

What day is today?


----------



## sjc

Where do babies come from?


----------



## jsadd

When snow melts, where does the white go?


----------



## B-Kay 1325

Which way did they go?


----------



## Forster

Is that an African or European swallow?


----------



## austenfiend

Does this taste bad to you?


----------



## Susan in VA

What's new, Pussycat?  wo-o-wo-wo-o.....


----------



## Tana928

Why do we drive on a parkway and park on a driveway?


----------



## sjc

Can't we all just get along?


----------



## Marguerite

Why do mares eat oats and does eat oats and little lambs eat ivy?


----------



## sjc

Susan in VA said:


> What's new, Pussycat? wo-o-wo-wo-o.....


LMAO!! I love you Susan. We are going to have so much fun in "school" including singing. I now have a visual of him singing that song.


----------



## Susan in VA

Me too.  I think I need to go find that tape (yes, actual cassette tape) right now.  


OT:  what else....  Why, why, why, Delilah??


----------



## sjc

OMG!!  You're killing me...


----------



## DenverRalphy

Why is the "International House of Pancakes" only in one nation?


----------



## MichelleR

Marguerite said:


> Why do mares eat oats and does eat oats and little lambs eat ivy?


(A kid would eat ivy too - wouldn't you?)

With six, do you really get egg rolls?


----------



## Geoffrey

Why isn’t the number 11 pronounced onety one?


----------



## DenverRalphy

Geoffrey said:


> Why isn't the number 11 pronounced onety one?


'cuz to geeks it's pronounced "Three" 

(ugh...on my 4th glass of wine late late at night... I think my humor is almost as dry as the wine)


----------



## BTackitt

Oh DeverRalphy I like the way you think.
Susan and SJC, Thanks, now I will have Tom in my head alll day... and it's Microbiology day.. 

(classic in a house with more than one kid)
Who did this?


----------



## kdawna

why do they call it "canning" when the jars are glass?


----------



## BTackitt

Mo-o-om Guess what?!?


----------



## Geoffrey

Do you smell something?


----------



## sjc

The infamous:

Where's the beef?


----------



## Tip10

What's the meaning of life?


----------



## sandypeach

Does this outfit make my butt look big?


BTW, guys, don't EVER answer that question


----------



## Leslie

Said to my son 46 times this week...

What do you think, that money grows on trees?


----------



## Alle Meine Entchen

is this (moldy, chunky food product) smell bad?  Or is it still good?


----------



## Susan in VA

DenverRalphy said:


> Why is the "International House of Pancakes" only in one nation?


I wonder that about the "World" Series.

Would you like fries with that?


----------



## B-Kay 1325

Oil or Cream?  (too many commercials)


----------



## Tip10

Why is it the first words out of somebody's mouth when they call you at 3 AM are always "Did I wake you?"


----------



## intinst

How high is up?


----------



## DenverRalphy

Tip10 said:


> Why is it the first words out of somebody's mouth when they call you at 3 AM are always "Did I wake you?"


LOL! I get this quite often, and my response is always... 'Nah, it's okay, I had to get up to answer the phone anyway.'

It's surprising how often the caller doesn't care two bits about whether they woke you, because they don't notice the irony of the statement and simply respond with something canned like 'Oh good, I was worried I would.'


----------



## B-Kay 1325

Are you listening?


----------



## leslieray

Can you hear me now (usually said into an already lost cell phone signal)


----------



## intinst

sandypeach said:


> Does this outfit make my butt look big?
> 
> BTW, guys, don't EVER answer that question


No safe answer from a man, best to just pretend you did not hear the question. (Advice from someone married 38 years)


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

Can I get you something?


----------



## Geoffrey

intinst said:


> No safe answer from a man, best to just pretend you did not hear the question. (Advice from someone married 38 years)


Did you hear something?


----------



## MichelleR

Now why did you do that to the cat?


----------



## luvmy4brats

Why did you tie your brother to the chair?


----------



## luvmy4brats

Do you want fries with that?


----------



## DenverRalphy

Why are there self-help "groups"?


----------



## Jen

Why is it that whenever I leave my house all of the bad drivers follow me around?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

What's for dinner?


----------



## Tip10

My father was a Navy Chaplain
Quite often, whenever folks found this out the first question of many was always:
"Oh, Is he Catholic?"
Almost every one of those who asked such a question were themselves Catholic.
Rather than have to go through all the explanations I got to where I usually just answered "Yes"
The average time that would lapse between my answer and the obvious smacking them in the face was about 5 minutes.
Some of them never really got it.


----------



## B-Kay 1325

How do I look?


----------



## Margaret

Will this be on the test?


----------



## Jen

Hmm, I wonder how long my fly has been down?

(This just happened to me)


----------



## loonlover

intinst said:


> No safe answer from a man, best to just pretend you did not hear the question. (Advice from someone married 38 years)


I don't think I have ever asked him this question - I think I was smart enough to know I wouldn't get an answer.


----------



## Geoffrey

B-Kay 1325 said:


> How do I look?


You look fabulous! Where did you get that?


----------



## Anju 

loonlover said:


> I don't think I have ever asked him this question - I think I was smart enough to know I wouldn't get an answer.


that's why you have been married forever


----------



## luvmy4brats

Where are my keys?


----------



## LaRita

Why is it the page you want is at the bottom of the pile when you start leafing from the top, and at the top when you start leafing from the bottom?


----------



## BTackitt

Who had the remote last? (house of 5 adult sized people and it is ALWAYS lost)


----------



## loonlover

luvmy4brats said:


> Where are my keys?


Going along with this: Where is my badge? I'm going to be late for work!


----------



## Geoffrey

Can I have one?


----------



## luvmy4brats

loonlover said:


> Going along with this: Where is my badge? I'm going to be late for work!


which goes along with:

Do you know where my phone is?


----------



## leslieray

If 4 out of 5 people suffer from diarrhea, does that mean that one of them enjoys it?


----------



## BTackitt

<Current one in our house>

Can I go to an all-night party after Prom this weekend?


----------



## sjc

How come you have an outie and I have an innie?


----------



## ValeriGail

Are they twins?

Identical or Paternal?

Can you tell them apart?


----------



## Alle Meine Entchen

ValeriGail said:


> Are they twins?
> 
> Identical or Paternal?
> 
> Can you tell them apart?


usually followed (or proceeded) by: how old? how many teeth? does she walk/talk/tap dance yet?


----------



## leslieray

Is anybody home?


----------



## Susan in VA

Cream and sugar?  One lump or two?


----------



## Brenda Carroll

How deep is that mudhole?


----------



## libros_lego

My mom does this all the time.... 
*calls someone, the other person answers* Mom: Who's this?


----------



## Brenda Carroll

My mom does that, too, but in New Orleans your mom would say:

"Who dat?"


----------



## Meredith Sinclair

Do you have ANY *IDEA* how that makes me *feel* ?


----------



## patinagle

Red or green?

(New Mexico's official state question)


----------



## luvmy4brats

Are you an idiot?


----------



## Susan in VA

Meredith Sinclair said:


> Do you have ANY *IDEA* how that makes me *feel* ?


and in a similar tone of voice:
Why does stuff like this always happen to _meeeee_?


----------



## libros_lego

*Hey, did you know?/ You know what? 

*Nope, not yet.


----------



## B-Kay 1325

Anyone home?


----------



## luvmy4brats

Did you feed the cats/dogs/frogs&snails?


----------



## luvmy4brats

Are you still awake?

<Um, no. Because you're TALKING to me!>


----------



## Susan in VA

What kind of moron would do such a thing??


----------



## luvmy4brats

What kind of fool do you think I am?


----------



## patinagle

Hi, honey, how was your day?


----------



## loonlover

How stupid do I look?


----------



## Susan in VA

Mirror, mirror on the wall, who's the fairest of them all?


----------



## B-Kay 1325

Where have all the flowers gone?


----------



## luvmy4brats

How much is that doggie in the window?


----------



## sjc

Are you talking to me?  Are you talking to meeee? (Asks in her best DeNiro voice)


----------



## B-Kay 1325

How do you mend a broken heart?


----------



## Susan in VA

I was wondering...  er, that is...  um..  would you...  well, uh...  would you like to go out sometime?


----------



## luvmy4brats

Why is it called a "drive through" if you have to stop?


----------



## sjc

*NOTE TO SUSAN*: I hummed, What's New Pussycat? all darn day today at work...I wanted to kill you...lol...


----------



## Susan in VA

LOL!  And I was humming Delilah all day long.  

We should really try to get those out of our mind.

Maybe with...

(OT!  )  "I think I love you, so what am I so afraid of...? "  

(or is the cure worse than the disease in this case?  )


----------



## sjc

Oh Noooooooooooooooooo!!  Wait till I get you in quilting class Missy!!!


----------



## J.L. Penn

I hear this one from my 3 yr old all the time: "What did you said?"  

-Jenn


----------



## Susan in VA

sjc said:


> Oh Noooooooooooooooooo!! Wait till I get you in quilting class Missy!!!


----------



## luvmy4brats

What's love got to do with it?  

(trying to get songs stuck in sjc's head)


----------



## Marguerite

Are you ready?


----------



## luvmy4brats

Who let the dogs out?


----------



## Annalog

The one I hear over the phone from my youngest granddaughter:
"Whatcha doin'?"


----------



## Susan in VA

Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, have you reached a verdict?


----------



## Addie

I want to know, have you ever seen the rain?


----------



## mlewis78

Why me?


----------



## luvmy4brats

Are those seats taken?


----------



## intinst

Why do you drive on a parkway and park on a driveway?


----------



## Leslie

Do you think I was born yesterday?

Do you think I just crawled out of the turnip patch?


----------



## Margaret

Who put the bop in the bop she bop she bop?  Who put the ram in the ram a lang a ding dong?


----------



## Geoffrey

Is it the weekend yet?


----------



## Leslie

What are you reading?


----------



## Dana

"How many licks does it take to get to the Tootsie Roll center of a Tootsie Pop?"

http://www.mahalo.com/tootsie-pop-contest


----------



## crebel

Did I do that? (Said in my best Urkel voice)


----------



## Ann in Arlington

Whatchoo talkin' 'bout, Willis?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

Would you like that supersized?


----------



## luvmy4brats

How come you press harder on a remote control when you know the battery is dead?


----------



## Tip10

Donde èsta al baňo?

Hvor er toilettet?

Gde zdes tualet?

Vu iz der bodtsimer?

Wo ist die toilette?

Ou sont les toilettes?

Waar is het toilet?

Dove e il bagno?

Choo kiko wapi?

Gdzie jest toaleta?

Where’s the bathroom?


----------



## BTackitt

Why are Teens nocturnal, when school starts between 8 & 9am?


----------



## BTackitt

Where is Thumbkin?


----------



## luvmy4brats

Who knows what evil lurks in the heart of men?

The Shadow knows!


----------



## Leslie

Tip10 said:


> Donde èsta al baňo?
> 
> Hvor er toilettet?
> 
> Gde zdes tualet?
> 
> Vu iz der bodtsimer?
> 
> Wo ist die toilette?
> 
> Ou sont les toilettes?
> 
> Waar is het toilet?
> 
> Dove e il bagno?
> 
> Choo kiko wapi?
> 
> Gdzie jest toaleta?
> 
> Where's the bathroom?


Il faut aller au lavabo
Pour faire les choses, les choses qu'il faut
Il faut aller au lavabo
Maintenant!


----------



## Ann in Arlington

Why
do
birds
suddenly appear
every time
you are near?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

Do you believe in love?


----------



## Leslie

Who let the dogs out?


----------



## crebel

Where do I begin?


----------



## Anju 

anyone else notice most of these are from the parents of kiddoes?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

Huh?


----------



## Jen

Are you even listening to me

*Silence*


----------



## Annalog

Why do you always answer a question with another question?


----------



## Tip10

Because why?


----------



## Ann in Arlington

Compared to what?

My husband says this all the time when he realizes, because of what I've just said, that whatever point he was attempting to make is not entirely correct.  It is sometimes acutely annoying.


----------



## luvmy4brats

If the professor on Giligan's Island can make a radio out of coconut, why can't he fix a hole in a boat?


----------



## HappyGuy

Forster said:


> Is that an African or European swallow?


Depends ... is it able to carry a coconut?


----------



## Tip10

Does anybody really know what time it is?


----------



## HappyGuy

For Jeff Hepple ... Where have all the young men gone?


----------



## Ann in Arlington

Tip10 said:


> Does anybody really know what time it is?


Does anybody really care. . . . . . . . . . . .

about time?


----------



## Susan in VA

Can't I stay awake and read just_ five_ more minutes? Pleeeeeeeease?


----------



## B-Kay 1325

Do you know how to get there?


----------



## intinst

How many roads must a man walk down before you call him a man? 

How many  seas must  a white dove sail before she sleeps in the sand? 

Yes how many times must the cannon balls fly before  they're forever banned? 

The answer my friend is blowin' in the wind.


----------



## B-Kay 1325

Do we need a map?


----------



## Susan in VA

What did the President know and when did he know it?


----------



## B-Kay 1325

Are you sure?


----------



## Leslie

luvmy4brats said:


> If the professor on Giligan's Island can make a radio out of coconut, why can't he fix a hole in a boat?


Why did Lovey Howell bring an entire wardrobe for a three hour tour?


----------



## angelad

Why is it stuffed up in here?


----------



## Annalog

Susan in VA said:


> Can't I stay awake and read just_ five_ more minutes? Pleeeeeeeease?


Why can't I read with my eyes closed?


----------



## B-Kay 1325

Is it soup yet?


----------



## Geoffrey

Overheard just now in the office:  "Who was that old dude that threw right before you last night?"


Said the 24 yo


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

What's that smell?

If you were under house arrest and lived in a mobile home, could you go where you wanted?


----------



## B-Kay 1325

What was that?


----------



## luvmy4brats

If corn oil is made from corn and vegetable oil is made from vegetables. What is baby oil made from?


----------



## intinst

Question usually heard in the dead of night right after an elbow to the ribs.
"Did you hear that?"


----------



## 908tracy

Question usuallly heard in the dead of the night just following the "did you hear that" elbow to the ribs....

"Hear what?" (snore)


----------



## Margaret

908tracy said:


> Question usuallly heard in the dead of the night just following the "did you hear that" elbow to the ribs....
> 
> "Hear what?" (snore)


Do you live in my house?


----------



## luvmy4brats

Is UPS here AGAIN

Often followed by:

What did you buy THIS TIME? 

(I hear this quite often )


----------



## Margaret

luvmy4brats said:


> Is UPS here AGAIN
> 
> Often followed by:
> 
> What did you buy THIS TIME?
> 
> (I hear this quite often )


Do you live in my house too?


----------



## luvmy4brats

Margaret said:


> Do you live in my house too?


Where do you live?


----------



## Neo

What were you thinking

Heard that a lot as a kid - my parents thought I had an overactive imagination (which was not a problem), and liked to act on it (which was the problem)...


----------



## Geoffrey

Oh, well if we're going with questions from our parents, how about ....


Do you want a reason to cry?


----------



## luvmy4brats

Who do you think you are?


----------



## Geoffrey

Were you born in a barn?


----------



## luvmy4brats

Do you really think you're going to get away with that?


----------



## BTackitt

What's for Dinner?
or
What do you want tonight?
or
Where do you wanna go? followed by I dunno, how about xyz, no not there.. then Where?


----------



## luvmy4brats

followed by:

Can I have a bite?


----------



## Ann in Arlington

Are you gonna eat that?


----------



## ladyknight33

Would I lie?

Don't you trust me?

Know what I mean?


----------



## Dana

Are you tired?  You must be, because you've been running through my mind all day long!


----------



## Susan in VA

And just WHAT do you think YOU'RE doing??


----------



## Dana

Why is it only drug dealers and software developers call their clients 'users'?


----------



## Neo

Who are you going with and WHO is that guy??


----------



## luvmy4brats

What do people in China call their good plates?


----------



## Kindled Spirit

Why do fools fall in love?


----------



## egh34

The Parent questions:

What? Who with? Who's that? How do you know them? Do I know their parents? Where are you going? When will you be back? How many are going? Have I met any of them?


----------



## Neo

Seriously?


----------



## Brenda Carroll

What is the secret of the Holy Grail?


----------



## luvmy4brats

Where's Waldo?


----------



## Brenda Carroll

and then "Where in the world is Carmen San Diego?"


----------



## luvmy4brats

Who Framed Roger Rabbit?


----------



## Susan in VA

Whodunit?


----------



## Marguerite

does this make me look fat?


----------



## egh34

Are you wearing that?


----------



## HappyGuy

Will the last word ever spoken be, "Why?"


----------



## Leslie

What is the sound of one hand clapping?

If a tree fell in the woods and there was no one there to hear it, would it make a sound?


----------



## luvmy4brats

Why do they call it "getting your dog fixed" if afterwards it doesn't work anymore?


----------



## BTackitt

luvmy4brats said:


> Why do they call it "getting your dog fixed" if afterwards it doesn't work anymore?





> If your six year old son asks his dad why the puppy has to go to the doctor, just know that the answer "To get his nuts chopped off" WILL be repeated to his teacher.


Dh found that quote on the internet this morning and I laughed so hard as I copied it to this thread...

Someone with little kids will recognize this...
Don't put that in your mouth, do you have ANY idea where it has been?!?


----------



## OliviaD

luvmy4brats said:


> Why do they call it "getting your dog fixed" if afterwards it doesn't work anymore?


My exact same thought! OK, what about this one. My daughter asked this one time while we were driving along and her sister never let her live it down. She looked up at a little crop duster flying over and said:

"I wonder who is flying that plane?"


----------



## intinst

"If a man is speaking in the woods and there isn't a woman around to hear him, is he still wrong?"


Spoiler



Before all you women jump in here, I know the answer is a resounding "YES!"


----------



## BTackitt

Why, when there is ABSOLUTELY nothing decent to watch on TV, will my DH pick the two worst movies on and flip back and forth between them to watch both?


----------



## BTackitt

ok.. so this happened today:
After hitting the local coffee shop, DH and I were wandering around long enough to drink our tea/coffee and before throwing the cups away, I looked at the little insulation sleeve on mine, thinking hey, I could save this and reuse it later. Then I read on it that it was 100% recycled paper, and 90% post-consumer paper, sooooooooo...

If I reused it at a later date would that make it 200% recycled & 190% post-consumer?


----------



## intinst

Is that paint wet? (Said after reading wet paint sign, just before sticking finger in wet paint)


----------



## Margaret

What did Delaware?
What did Idaho?


----------



## Brenda Carroll

intinst said:


> "If a man is speaking in the woods and there isn't a woman around to hear him, is he still wrong?"
> 
> 
> Spoiler
> 
> 
> 
> Before all you women jump in here, I know the answer is a resounding "YES!"


The answer is not always a resounding "yes". If the man speaking in the woods is surrounded by savages who are about to cut off his head and shrink it down to the size of a walnut and he is saying "I knew my wife was right when she said 'take the left fork, honey'!!!", then he may not be considered wrong in most instances.

On the other hand: Who ate the last cupcake?


----------



## R. M. Reed

What the...?


----------



## Geoffrey

Do you want anything while I'm up?


----------



## Marguerite

Geoffrey said:


> Do you want anything while I'm up?


Quote from Jeff Foxworthy "Sensuous...Since you was up yeah I would"
Why do people move back into trailer parks that have been hit by tornados?


----------



## luvmy4brats

What was I looking for?


----------



## Marguerite

Are you pregnant?  A question asked by my then 3 year old to the large (not pregnant) lady next door


----------



## OliviaD

Marguerite said:


> Quote from Jeff Foxworthy "Sensuous...Since you was up yeah I would"
> Why do people move back into trailer parks that have been hit by tornados?


I know this thread is for questions, but I couldn't help but answer this one: If the trailer park has already been hit, then what are the odds of being hit by a tornado again?

Related random question: Why DO tornadoes like to hit trailer parks?


----------



## Neo

Would you like cream and sugar with your coffee?


----------



## Marguerite

should we discuss religion or politics?


----------



## NogDog

Why does the fine-structure constant have a [approximate] value of 1/137.035999679 ?


----------



## 1131

Are those real?


----------



## luvmy4brats

Where are we going?


----------



## Sofie

Do you know the way to San Jose?


----------



## luvmy4brats

Do you know the muffin man?


----------



## luvmy4brats

imallbs said:


> Are those real?


----------



## Sofie

> Do you know the muffin man?


The Muffin Man? Yes, I know the Muffin Man!

Just watched Shrek the other night.


----------



## 1131

Who is They?  And why does They need to offer an opinion on everything I do?


----------



## DenverRalphy

Never ask these right after semi-romantic situations...

"What are you thinking about?" (typical _honest _answers... Pizza, Donuts, SportsCenter)

"Was it good for you?" (will _never _produce an honest answer short of actually amazing)


----------



## Margaret

What's your sign?


----------



## Dana

How can there be self-help groups?


----------



## Leslie

BTackitt said:


> Why, when there is ABSOLUTELY nothing decent to watch on TV, will my DH pick the two worst movies on and flip back and forth between them to watch both?


Back in the old days, when TVs had only less than 10 channels (growing up in the suburbs of NYC, we had 7; I know plenty of people who had only 3), it made sense that there would be absolutely nothing decent to watch on TV--although I don't recall it happening all that often. Now, we have over 250 channels and there is absolutely nothing decent to watch--ALL THE TIME. Why?

(This is a large part of the reason why I quit watching TV.)


----------



## luvmy4brats

Where are we going?  

Followed 2 minutes later by child #2 asking:

Where are we going?

Followed immediately by child #3 who's standing next to child #2

Where are we going?

Followed by child #4:

Where are we going?


----------



## Ann in Arlington

Oh, I know where we're going. . . . . . . . .but, are we there yet?


----------



## Susan in VA

Who else remembers...  

"It's ten p.m.  Do you know where your children are?"


----------



## Marguerite

can you see what I see?


----------



## Alle Meine Entchen

Marguerite said:


> can you see what I see?


Do you hear what I hear? A Star, a star. . .

Great, now I'm gonna be humming christmas music


----------



## Susan in VA

You beat me to that one by _seconds_!


----------



## luvmy4brats

Was it a dream where you see yourself standing in sort of sun-god robes on a pyramid with a thousand naked women screaming and throwing little pickles at you?


----------



## DenverRalphy

AM I as think I drunk I am?


----------



## Annalog

Susan in VA said:


> Who else remembers...
> 
> "It's ten p.m. Do you know where your children are?"


I remember that one. However when I told that to my oldest granddaughter when she was visiting and it was LONG past bedtime, she said, "No, it is:
It's eleven p.m. Do you know where your children are?"


----------



## Geoffrey

DenverRalphy said:


> AM I as think I drunk I am?


Mija, Do you want one more just to top off?


----------



## BTackitt

Which way did he go George, which way did he go?


----------



## telracs

B-Kay 1325 said:


> Where have all the flowers gone?


We have a few threads for that...

Have you seen all of those?

[reference to my broadway tote bag]


----------



## Jeff

FearNot said:


> For Jeff Hepple ... Where have all the young men gone?


Gone to soldiers every one.


----------



## telracs

Jeff said:


> Gone to soldiers every one.


Where have all the soldiers gone?

[long time passing....]


----------



## Susan in VA

When will they ever learn....?


----------



## Jeff

B-Kay 1325 said:


> Where have all the flowers gone?


Gone to graveyards, every one.


----------



## telracs

Jeff said:


> Gone to graveyards, every one.


Where have all the graveyards gone?

[long time ago...]


----------



## Jeff

Why do the phrases "easy as pie" and "piece of cake" mean something other than what they say where "easy as cake" and piece of pie" mean exactly what they say.


----------



## Susan in VA

I've never heard "easy as cake", is that really an expression?


----------



## telracs

Which way is north?

[meaningless in NYC]


----------



## Jeff

Susan in VA said:


> I've never heard "easy as cake", is that really an expression?


Only if American English idioms are unfamiliar to you.


----------



## Addie

I've never hear of "easy as cake" either. Hmm.



BTackitt said:


> Which way did he go George, which way did he go?


What's up, doc?


----------



## Jeff

I withdraw my question as being too random.


----------



## Leslie

scarlet said:


> Which way is north?
> 
> [meaningless in NYC]


Meaningless in Boston and Portland, ME, too, and probably most of the northeast...

When people tell me to "drive west on X Avenue" I just look at them and say, "Huh?"


----------



## telracs

How many miles is it?

[sorry, NYers think in terms of blocks, not miles. and if you're interested, 20 short city blocks equals one mile]


----------



## Jeff

What exit?


----------



## Susan in VA

Jeff said:


> Only if American English idioms are unfamiliar to you.


After all this time, you'd think I'd have heard _most_ of them... care to explain?


----------



## Jeff

Susan in VA said:


> After all this time, you'd think I'd have heard _most_ of them... care to explain?


Explaining a bad joke is worse than telling one but, for you, I'll make a bigger fool of myself:

In some movie, _Die Hard_ perhaps - we'll pretend that's it for sake of explanation - the bad guys are a German gang pretending to be Americans and one says "it's a piece of pie" or maybe it was "it's easy as cake" - and he gets shot by Bruce Willis for using the wrong noun.

Can I go now?


----------



## telracs

Jeff said:


> Can I go now?


May I go now?


----------



## Addie

Jeff said:


> Explaining a bad joke is worse than telling one but, for you, I'll make a bigger fool of myself:
> 
> In some movie, _Die Hard_ perhaps - we'll pretend that's it for sake of explanation - the bad guys are a German gang pretending to be Americans and one says "it's a piece of pie" or maybe it was "it's easy as cake" - and he gets shot by Bruce Willis for using the wrong noun.
> 
> Can I go now?


LOL Totally worth the explanation.


----------



## Addie

Oh, darn. I broke the only rule there is. Uhh ... What time is it?


----------



## telracs

AddieLove said:


> Oh, darn. I broke the only rule there is. Uhh ... What time is it?


There are rules?


----------



## Addie

scarlet said:


> There are rules?


Aren't there?


----------



## Jeff

scarlet said:


> May I go now?


No kid says "may I go now".


----------



## Susan in VA

Jeff said:


> Explaining a bad joke is worse than telling one but, for you, I'll make a bigger fool of myself:
> 
> In some movie, _Die Hard_ perhaps - we'll pretend that's it for sake of explanation - the bad guys are a German gang pretending to be Americans and one says "it's a piece of pie" or maybe it was "it's easy as cake" - and he gets shot by Bruce Willis for using the wrong noun.
> 
> Can I go now?


Ahhhh.... thank you.

(Funny, an essay on a very similar really bad joke is what won me my Kindle! )


----------



## Jeff

Susan in VA said:


> Ahhhh.... thank you.
> 
> (Funny, an essay on a very similar really bad joke is what won me my Kindle! )


Feel free to quote me.


----------



## B-Kay 1325

Where are you from?


----------



## intinst

You're not from around here, are you?


----------



## Susan in VA

You told your boss to do WHAT??


----------



## Jeff

Why is there air?

EDIT: For anyone needing clarification:


Spoiler



http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Why_Is_There_Air%3F


----------



## luvmy4brats

Why are you still awake at 1:15am?


----------



## BTackitt

How will we pay for 3 colleges at once?


----------



## Tip10

When a fly lands on the ceiling does it do a barrel roll or a loop to land?


----------



## Jeff

Why do you always do that?


----------



## telracs

Are you eating that?


----------



## Susan in VA

Are you _trying_ to annoy me?


----------



## Jeff

Are you ever going to get to the point?


----------



## Susan in VA

What makes you think you know more about this than I do?


----------



## Tip10

What makes you say that?


----------



## Brenda Carroll

What the .... is that?! And does it live in Texas?  (see Inifity Thread for details)


----------



## BTackitt

And I should care about this why?


----------



## Susan in VA

Grouchy today, aren't we?


----------



## Tip10

What's got your hackles up?


----------



## Jeff

Who gives a


Spoiler



Insert Profanity


?


----------



## Leslie

What part of NO don't you understand?


----------



## jesscscott

Hey, good lookin'--what you got cookin'?


----------



## Jeff

Who was that masked-man?


----------



## Susan in VA

Why don't you get a_ real_ job?


----------



## Addie

What's wrong with my job?


----------



## telracs

AddieLove said:


> What's wrong with my job?


what's _right_ with my job?


----------



## Jeff

Look, up in the sky - is it a bird - is it a plane?


----------



## Susan in VA

What have you been smoking??


----------



## Annalog

Because of A Flower a Day:

"Would you tell me, please," said Alice, a little timidly, "why you are painting those roses?"
...
"Who's been painting my roses red?
Who's been painting my roses red?
Who dares to paint the vulgar paint the royal flower bed?"


----------



## luvmy4brats

Say what?


----------



## Addie

Should I stay or should I go?


----------



## telracs

Who'll stop the rain?

@annalog- since I'm in an Alice mood, that question was perfect.  And for blue roses, see the photo effects thread!


----------



## Susan in VA

AddieLove said:


> Should I stay or should I go?


Your place or mine?


----------



## telracs

Mo-oooom, why can't I have a pink netbook?


----------



## luvmy4brats

scarlet said:


> Mo-oooom, why can't I have a pink netbook?


LOL!!!


----------



## luvmy4brats

WHAT did you buy


----------



## Susan in VA

scarlet said:


> Mo-oooom, why can't I have a pink netbook?


----------



## Susan in VA

You spent HOW much?!?


----------



## loonlover

How COULD YOU?


----------



## Susan in VA

What will the neighbors say?


----------



## ValeriGail

I'm looking for attention
Not another question
Should you stay or should you go?

Well, if you don't have the answer
Why are you still standin' here?


----------



## telracs

What am I going to tell your father?


----------



## luvmy4brats

If your friend Jason jumped off the bridge, would you jump off too?


----------



## luvmy4brats

Is it on SALE??


----------



## Susan in VA

Are you almost done?
How much longer are you going to take??


----------



## Susan in VA

luvmy4brats said:


> Is it on SALE??


Do you have those in a size 7 1/2?


----------



## Addie

Will you raise me up? Will you help me down? Will you get me right out of this Godforsaken town?


----------



## telracs

AddieLove said:


> Will you raise me up? Will you help me down? Will you get me right out of this Godforsaken town?


Listening to Meat Loaf?


----------



## Addie

scarlet said:


> Listening to Meat Loaf?


Aren't you?


----------



## telracs

Isn't everyone?


----------



## Jeff

Not me.

Why do you build me up, Buttercup?


----------



## telracs

How can we sing songs of Zion, in a foreign land?


----------



## Susan in VA

Who's that lady with my man, who can she be?


----------



## telracs

Who can it be now?


----------



## Addie

18 years, 18 years, and on her 18th birthday, he found out it wasn't his?


----------



## B-Kay 1325

Say what?


----------



## Susan in VA

Am I ever going to get through this pile of homework? <sigh>


----------



## Marguerite

am I ever going to get the house clean?


----------



## mlewis78

Why not?


----------



## intinst

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop?


----------



## Margaret

Hey, Tootsie, wanna roll?


----------



## Leslie

This is a really random question that I would like an answer to, if anyone knows...

When cats lick themselves, do they just lick here and there randomly, or do they have a pattern that they follow to make sure they cover their whole body? Does a cat clean him/herself completely every day, or does it take several days? Or do they never really clean themselves and it is just some random licking?


----------



## Ann in Arlington

Do you have any appointments for today?

(Answer: No, I'm sorry. Nothing before Thursday. )

But, isn't that the last day?  Isn't that cutting it kind of close?


NB:  the above is an actual conversation with a tax client yesterday afternoon.  Yesterday Afternoon was the first they'd stopped by the office.


----------



## Tip10

WASSSSSUP


----------



## R. M. Reed

Why can't you be normal?


----------



## R. M. Reed

Leslie said:


> This is a really random question that I would like an answer to, if anyone knows...
> 
> When cats lick themselves, do they just lick here and there randomly, or do they have a pattern that they follow to make sure they cover their whole body? Does a cat clean him/herself completely every day, or does it take several days? Or do they never really clean themselves and it is just some random licking?


I'm not sure about all that, but I learned recently that the reason cats clean themselves is so that their prey won't smell them. My cats still do it even though their prey is a bowl of cat food that can't smell anything.


----------



## Susan in VA

With my cats, often it just looks random, but sometimes I see them do a full "bath", methodically and carefully.  And their only prey is commercial cat food in a bowl, and crickets that got lost inside the house.

BTW (in case anyone cares) if this *is* just for covering up their scent, it's instinctive, not learned.  Two of my cats were abandoned by their mother at two days old and then bottle-raised without other adult cats around. 


Ann  --  that sounds like the beginning of a new thread....  Outrageous Client Demands....    
You could celebrate the near-end of tax season by starting one!


Oh yeah...  questions...  How can it be almost eleven already when I haven't even had my tea yet??


----------



## luvmy4brats

What have you done for me lately?


----------



## Margaret

Are you a good witch or a bad witch?

(Was that on here already?)


----------



## telracs

R. Reed said:


> Why can't you be normal?


What's your definition of normal?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

luvmy4brats said:


> Was it a dream where you see yourself standing in sort of sun-god robes on a pyramid with a thousand naked women screaming and throwing little pickles at you?


Am I the only one to have that dream?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

Jeff said:


> Can I go now?


I don't know. Can you?


----------



## intinst

scarlet said:


> What's your definition of normal?


Normal for me ,or normal for other people?


----------



## Susan in VA

intinst said:


> Normal for me ,or normal for other people?


What makes you think you're different from everyone else?

also known as...

What makes you think the rules don't apply to you?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

Why does this always happen to me?


----------



## Addie

Is this burning an eternal flame?


----------



## DonnaFaz

Romper, bomper, stomper boo. Tell me, tell me, tell me, do. Magic Mirror, tell me today, have all my friends had fun at play?


----------



## Addie

Mirror, mirror on the wall, who in the land is fairest of all?


----------



## Geoffrey

Susan in VA said:


> What have you been smoking??


It's good ... want some?


----------



## telracs

Is that your final answer?


----------



## BTackitt

Who put the Bom in the Bom shi bom shi bom? Who put the Dip in the Dip di dip di dip?


----------



## telracs

Who moved my cheese?


----------



## telracs

If happy little bluebirds fly beyond the rainbow, why oh why, can't I?


----------



## Alle Meine Entchen

what is that smell?


----------



## Ann in Arlington

The dreaded:

Does this outfit make my butt look big?


Answer:  No


----------



## ValeriGail

Did I give birth to monkeys?


----------



## telracs

ValeriGail said:


> Did I give birth to monkeys?


Am I adopted?


----------



## luvmy4brats

Are you my mother?


----------



## telracs

Who's your daddy?


----------



## Meredith Sinclair

D'ya want that in a bag?


----------



## BTackitt

So tell me why can't this be love?


----------



## luvmy4brats

What's love got to do with it?


----------



## telracs

Paper or Plastic?


----------



## BTackitt

Cash or credit?


----------



## luvmy4brats

Soup or salad?


----------



## Addie

What is love?


----------



## 1131

Was that today?

followed 2 hours later by

Oakland! Didn't you say you were coming into Sacramento?


----------



## intinst

What color is your parachute?


----------



## DonnaFaz

Where is the love?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

Are you done?


----------



## Jeff

Will you still respect me in the morning?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

Is everything OK with your meal? (Asked when your mouth is full and can't answer)


----------



## Susan in VA

For those of us old enough to remember the standard in-flight question back when they provided Actual Meals...

Chicken or beef?


----------



## Addie

Eww. This tastes like foot. Here, try it. If you don't try it, how am I supposed to know if you think it's gross? 
(I do this all the time.)


----------



## Margaret

Do you like green eggs and ham?


----------



## Andra

Dana said:


> "How many licks does it take to get to the Tootsie Roll center of a Tootsie Pop?"
> 
> http://www.mahalo.com/tootsie-pop-contest


three! (said in the owl's voice)


----------



## Andra

Now for my question-

Do you want milk or honey with your bread?


----------



## Jeff

What do you want; egg in your beer?


----------



## telracs

Jeff said:


> What do you want; egg in your beer?


Huh?


----------



## DonnaFaz

AddieLove said:


> Eww. This tastes like foot. Here, try it. If you don't try it, how am I supposed to know if you think it's gross?
> (I do this all the time.)


How do you know what foot tastes like? LOL


----------



## sjc

OK Luv:  the gloves are off:  

Why do birds suddenly appear, every time you are near?


----------



## Jeff

Birds fly over the rainbow, why oh why can't I?


----------



## DonnaFaz

Listen,
Do you want to know a secret?,
Do you promise not to tell?, whoa oh, oh.


----------



## luvmy4brats

Do you hear what I hear?


----------



## sjc

Do you see what I see?


----------



## luvmy4brats

Who's on first?


----------



## Jeff

Costello: That's what I want to find out.
Abbott: I say Who's on first, What's on second, I Don't Know's on third.
Costello: Are you the manager?
Abbott: Yes.
Costello: You gonna be the coach too?
Abbott: Yes.
Costello: And you don't know the fellows' names?
Abbott: Well I should.
Costello: Well then who's on first?
Abbott: Yes.
Costello: I mean the fellow's name.
Abbott: Who.
Costello: The guy on first.
Abbott: Who.
Costello: The first baseman.
Abbott: Who.
Costello: The guy playing...
Abbott: Who is on first!
Costello: I'm asking YOU who's on first.
Abbott: That's the man's name.
Costello: That's who's name?
Abbott: Yes.
Costello: Well go ahead and tell me.
Abbott: That's it.
Costello: That's who?
Abbott: Yes.
PAUSE
Costello: Look, you gotta first baseman?
Abbott: Certainly.
Costello: Who's playing first?
Abbott: That's right.
Costello: When you pay off the first baseman every month, who gets the money?
Abbott: Every dollar of it.
Costello: All I'm trying to find out is the fellow's name on first base.
Abbott: Who.
Costello: The guy that gets...
Abbott: That's it.
Costello: Who gets the money...
Abbott: He does, every dollar. Sometimes his wife comes down and collects it.
Costello: Whose wife?
Abbott: Yes.
PAUSE
Abbott: What's wrong with that?
Costello: Look, all I wanna know is when you sign up the first baseman, how does he sign his name?
Abbott: Who.
Costello: The guy.
Abbott: Who.
Costello: How does he sign...
Abbott: That's how he signs it.
Costello: Who?
Abbott: Yes.


----------



## Geoffrey

Do you really want to hurt me?  Do you really want to make me cry?


----------



## Susan in VA

^^^  I'd say that's a fitting comment on the previous post.  That skit makes me grit my teeth.




Sunny-side-up, or over?


----------



## luvmy4brats

Who knows what evil lurks in the heart of men?

_Edit: I wondered if this one had been posted yet, so I went back and looked:

it has been....by me, 5 days ago  _


----------



## telracs

You want ketchup with that?


----------



## B-Kay 1325

What are you doing this weekend?


----------



## luvmy4brats

Where do babies come from?


----------



## loonlover

Where did the day go?


----------



## B-Kay 1325

Are you losing weight?


----------



## Susan in VA

Why are people who like music that I can't stand always the ones to stop next to me at the traffic lights, with stereo cranked up high and all their windows open?


----------



## telracs

why do people play their music so loud that I can hear it on a crowded subway when they are 10 feet away?


----------



## luvmy4brats

What planet have you been on?


----------



## B-Kay 1325

Why do people drive around late at night/early morning with their music on so loud that it shakes the windows in the houses?  Don't they know that people are trying to sleep?


----------



## Susan in VA

Why do people mow their lawns at 7 a.m. on summer weekends?  Don't they know, etc.


----------



## Susan in VA

It's April 15th, have you done your taxes?


----------



## Margaret

Did our refund check come yet?


----------



## Annalog

scarlet said:


> You want ketchup with that?


Pardon me, do you have any Grey Poupon?

Did you know that Reply with Quote works from a K2?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

Will I remember you? Will you remember me?


----------



## Tip10

But will you respect me in the morning?


----------



## luvmy4brats

Who are you?


----------



## telracs

luvmy4brats said:


> Who are you?


Who am I?



Spoiler



I'm Jean ValJean!


----------



## Susan in VA

Oh man, here we go again with tunes I can't get out of my head.  Thanks a lot, scarlet.  Good thing I already got my revenge a moment earlier in another thread.  


How many more days until the weekend??


----------



## telracs

do dandelion wishes come true?

(and susan, my whole life is song cues, sorry...)


----------



## DonnaFaz

Hey, Joe, were you goin' with that gun in your hand?


----------



## telracs

What's the distance between a bullet and a gun?


----------



## DonnaFaz

Doesn't it depend on when you pull the trigger?


----------



## telracs

Can I be happy now?


----------



## luvmy4brats

What's new pussycat?


----------



## DonnaFaz

Have you never been mellow?


----------



## OliviaD

Is there anyone out there?


----------



## Alle Meine Entchen

I know what you're thinking. "Did he fire six shots or only five?" Well, to tell you the truth, in all this excitement I kind of lost track myself. But being as this is a .44 Magnum, the most powerful handgun in the world, and would blow your head clean off, you've got to ask yourself one question: Do I feel lucky? Well, do ya, punk?


----------



## luvmy4brats

Asked by one of my children this evening:

Do you want to smell my pits?


----------



## DonnaFaz

Alle Meine Entchen said:


> I know what you're thinking. "Did he fire six shots or only five?" Well, to tell you the truth, in all this excitement I kind of lost track myself. But being as this is a .44 Magnum, the most powerful handgun in the world, and would blow your head clean off, you've got to ask yourself one question: Do I feel lucky? Well, do ya, punk?


LOL Excellent!

Who ya gonna call?


----------



## telracs

Do you want to make a memory?

(10 points to whoever can figure out what band scarlet has been playing all day)


----------



## DonnaFaz

Bon Jovi?


----------



## telracs

DonnaFaz said:


> Bon Jovi?


And how would you like your points delivered?


----------



## DonnaFaz

With an extra large pizza?


----------



## telracs

DonnaFaz said:


> With an extra large pizza?


You want pepperoni on that?


----------



## Jeff

Why can’t we just be friends?


----------



## Ann in Arlington

What are friends for?


----------



## sjc

Where are you from?


----------



## Neo

What's the difference between me and you?


----------



## sjc

Do you speak the language?


----------



## Meredith Sinclair

How'd you do that?


----------



## Ann in Arlington

_Why_ did you do that?

or, the more colloquial:

Whatja do that for?


----------



## sjc

Whichamacallit?


----------



## Annalog

Where did you put that thingamajig?


----------



## Meredith Sinclair

Who was that?


----------



## Meredith Sinclair

Wanna bite?


----------



## luvmy4brats

Is there any left?


----------



## Meredith Sinclair

Uh, huh... Wont SOME?


----------



## Susan in VA

Can I get a new fork for that?


----------



## B-Kay 1325

Do you hear the people sing?


----------



## telracs

Why are there so many songs about rainbows?

And what's on the other side?


----------



## luvmy4brats

Are you in the house alone?

<quick, who wrote it?>


----------



## Tip10

Would you be mine?
Could you be mine?
Won't you be my neighbor?


----------



## Toronto_LV

Why does the word "colonel" sound like it has an 'r' in it when spoken out loud?


----------



## Jeff

Is something burning?


----------



## Susan in VA

<yawn> Where's my second cup of tea?


----------



## R. M. Reed

Who died and made you king?


----------



## telracs

How can people be so heartless?
How can people be so cruel?


----------



## Susan in VA

How can they ignore their friends?


----------



## Margaret

Do they only care about the bleeding crowd?  How about a needing friend?


----------



## Jeff

Are you a boy, or are you a girl?


----------



## telracs

What do you do with a B.A. in English?


----------



## telracs

Pardon me, sir, but have you seen a large white rabbit in a waistcoat, carrying a pocketwatch?


----------



## Jeff

Pardon me boy, is the the Chattanooga choo-choo?


----------



## Neo

Do you really want to hurt me? Do you really want to make me cry?

Sorry, just heard it on the radio and for some stupid reason can't get it out of my mind now. Thought I'd share


----------



## telracs

Perhaps you remember the strange affair of the Phantom of the Opera?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

Do you know the way to San Jose?


----------



## telracs

What if you could build him up big? I mean that should be easy for you.
If Dallas were one of those men, what would my brother say then?

[anybody know this musical?]


----------



## Jeff

This same lonely desert was the last known home of the Manson family; will he make that grim connection when my attorney starts screaming about bats and huge manta rays coming down on the car?


----------



## telracs

Jeff said:


> This same lonely desert was the last known home of the Manson family; will he make that grim connection when my attorney starts screaming about bats and huge manta rays coming down on the car?


Jeff, are you aware that you're scaring me?


----------



## DonnaFaz

scarlet said:


> How can people be so heartless?
> How can people be so cruel?


(I loved, _loved_, *LOVED* this song as a teen.)

Can we vote Jeff off the Island?


----------



## telracs

DonnaFaz said:


> Can we vote Jeff off the Island?


No.

Would you light my candle?


----------



## Jeff

What are you staring at?


----------



## telracs

Jeff said:


> What are you staring at?


Who, me?


----------



## Brenda Carroll

Is that your best shot?


----------



## mlewis78

What kind of fool am I?


----------



## intinst

Are you crazy or do you think I am?


----------



## Jeff

What kind of fool do you think I am?


----------



## luvmy4brats

Can't we all just get along?


----------



## intinst

Why do fools fall in love?


----------



## Susan in VA

luvmy4brats said:


> Can't we all just get along?


I was just about to say that, catching up on this thread...

I like manta rays! (though probably not on my car.  )

It's Saturday night already, where did the day go??


----------



## tessa

intinst said:


> Why do fools fall in love?


Why do birds sing so gay?


----------



## B-Kay 1325

How can you stop the rain from falling down?


----------



## Susan in VA

What makes the world go 'round?


----------



## B-Kay 1325

How much is that doggie in the window?


----------



## Susan in VA

How much is that in US dollars?


----------



## telracs

Do you have change for a dollar?


----------



## intinst

Brother, can you spare a dime?


----------



## tessa

shave and a haircut


----------



## sjc

Do you, do you, Do you wanna dance?



> How much is that doggie in the window?


The one with the waggily tail?


----------



## HappyGuy

What's a Henway?


----------



## Ann in Arlington

2 to 3 pounds.



Was that a rhetorical question?


----------



## Margaret

Can you tell me how to get to Sesame Street?


----------



## intinst

Do you know the way to San Jose?


----------



## tessa

I've been away so long. I may go wrong and lose my way.


----------



## sjc

Oh where, oh where has my little dog gone?
Oh where, oh where can he be?


----------



## telracs

Five foot two, eyes of blue, has anybody seen my gal?


----------



## Margaret

Who has seen the wind?


----------



## tessa

They called the wind Mariah


----------



## luvmy4brats

Whatcha doing?


----------



## telracs

tessa, may I remind you this is a _question_ thread?


----------



## Neo

Why are the week-ends always so short?


----------



## Brenda Carroll

one lump or two?


----------



## Addie

Why are the weekdays always so long?


----------



## intinst

Is it Friday yet?


----------



## sjc

Where did Intinst get that cool Avatar?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

Can you believe it?


----------



## BTackitt

What makes the world go 'round?


----------



## Ann in Arlington

Who ya gonna call?



(I think this is the first time for that one. . can't really believe it's taken this long . . . . )


----------



## Anju 

why do they call the wind miriah?


----------



## sjc

Where are my keys?


----------



## Alle Meine Entchen

why is a raven like a writing desk?


----------



## Tip10

Why do they call the slowest traffic time "Rush Hour"?


----------



## sjc

...Will you love me forever? 
Do you need me?
Will you never leave me?
Will you make me so happy for the rest of my life?
Will you take me away?
Will you make me your wife?...


----------



## telracs

sjc said:


> ...Will you love me forever?
> Do you need me?
> Will you never leave me?
> Will you make me so happy for the rest of my life?
> Will you take me away?
> Will you make me your wife?...


Listening to Meat Loaf again?


----------



## HappyGuy

Huh?


----------



## HappyGuy

Is that all there is, my friend?


----------



## Tip10

Is a seismic event on Mars called a Marsquake?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

Will you still need me, Will you still feed me, when I'm 64?


----------



## DonnaFaz

Does an alarm clock go off...or on?


----------



## sjc

Which end is up?


----------



## telracs

Did you remember to turn off the iron?


----------



## B-Kay 1325

Do you have the tickets?


----------



## sjc

How come?


----------



## Meredith Sinclair

why no-oooot?


----------



## telracs

what time is the flight?


----------



## telracs

How do I get from Union Station to the FDR memorial?


----------



## intinst

Who's buried in Grant's tomb?


----------



## sjc

Will you marry me?


----------



## Margaret

How can I say no?


----------



## Susan in VA

Scarlet, ever heard of a map?


----------



## HappyGuy

Say whaaaat


----------



## sjc

Spoiler



WTF?


----------



## telracs

Susan in VA said:


> Scarlet, ever heard of a map?


Susan, ever heard of a rhetorical question?


----------



## Tip10

How come, when you stay in water for a long time your fingers and your toes get pruned but nothing else does?


----------



## sjc

Tip10 said:


> How come, when you stay in water for a long time your fingers and your toes get pruned but nothing else does?


Who says? 
Is that your theory?
Are you sticking to it?


----------



## telracs

Why is it going to rain in DC tomorrow?


----------



## Neo

Can I go now? Or do I have to sit at this desk much longer?


----------



## B-Kay 1325

Is it soup yet?


----------



## loonlover

When will the doctor see me?


----------



## 908tracy

Whats for dinner?


----------



## Margaret

Who's cooking?


----------



## sjc

Is it Friday yet?


----------



## Susan in VA

scarlet said:


> Susan, ever heard of a rhetorical question?


What, isn't half the fun answering questions with another question??


----------



## telracs

Who you gonna pick on while I'm off the boards?


----------



## Susan in VA

What makes you think I can't pick on you_ off_ the boards?


----------



## telracs

Why do I even try to talk to you?


----------



## luvmy4brats

Why me?


----------



## Susan in VA

scarlet said:


> Why do I even try to talk to you?


What, do you have voice-recognition software?


----------



## telracs

Susan in VA said:


> What, do you have voice-recognition software?


why am i still reading this when I should be packing?


----------



## loonlover

Why is KB so addictive?


----------



## Susan in VA

scarlet said:


> why am i still reading this when I should be packing?


What time's the train?


----------



## Ann in Arlington

Spoiler



Will you two please shut it already?!?



(Did I just say that out loud?)


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

"Why don't you cut your hair?
Why don't you live up there?
Why don't you do what I do,
See what I feel when I care?
Why don't you be like me?
Why don't you stop and see?
Why don't you hate who I hate,
Kill who I kill to be free?"

Do you know what song this is from and who wrote it?


----------



## BTackitt

why do printers always run out of ink on the last page of a document being printed?


----------



## OliviaD

Why do printers always run out of paper on the last page of a document, but only if you have no paper stashed in the desk?  How does it know?


----------



## Tip10

mom133d said:


> "Why don't you cut your hair?
> Why don't you live up there?
> Why don't you do what I do,
> See what I feel when I care?
> Why don't you be like me?
> Why don't you stop and see?
> Why don't you hate who I hate,
> Kill who I kill to be free?"
> 
> Do you know what song this is from and who wrote it?


Micky Dolenz

Something like Randy Scouse Git ?


----------



## patinagle

What time is it?


----------



## intinst

(It's Howdy Doody Time!)
What day is it?


----------



## 908tracy

Is it vacation time yet?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

Tip10 said:


> Micky Dolenz
> 
> Something like Randy Scouse Git ?


Another Monkees fan?


----------



## Susan in VA

Ann in Arlington said:


> Spoiler
> 
> 
> 
> Will you two please shut it already?!?
> 
> 
> 
> (Did I just say that out loud?)


LOL! It will be peaceful today, 1/2 of the Snarkettes is on a train.

But aren't you looking forward to tomorrow?


----------



## luvmy4brats

Susan in VA said:


> But aren't you looking forward to tomorrow?


Won't this be fun?


----------



## Margaret

Why can't we just all get along?


----------



## Jeff

When will they ever learn?


----------



## luvmy4brats

Where do we go from here?


----------



## Jeff

What's going on?


----------



## luvmy4brats

Is there a problem?


----------



## Jeff

What's your problem?


----------



## luvmy4brats

Are you talking to me?


----------



## Jeff

What's new pussycat?


----------



## luvmy4brats

What's happening, Hotstuff?


----------



## Jeff

Is this where we came in?


----------



## BTackitt

Mom, can you fix this?


----------



## luvmy4brats

Are you confused?


----------



## Jeff

Which way is up?


----------



## luvmy4brats

Did we miss our turn?


----------



## Jeff

Who was that lady I saw you with last night?


----------



## 908tracy

Are you lost?


----------



## Margaret

Why would you say that?


----------



## luvmy4brats

Why do you keep asking me all these questions?


----------



## sjc

Why Mom, Mom, Mom, Mom and never Dad?


----------



## Jeff

Don't you ever get tired of hurting me?


----------



## 908tracy

Don't you ever get tired of asking questions?


----------



## luvmy4brats

Doesn't anybody have an answer for me?


----------



## Jeff

Do you feel weak, tired and run-down?


----------



## luvmy4brats

Are you paranoid?


----------



## Jeff

Don't you know that paranoia is just a heightened state of awareness?


----------



## luvmy4brats

Do you hear those voices?


----------



## 908tracy

What voices?


----------



## luvmy4brats

You don't hear them?


----------



## Jeff

What was the question?


----------



## 908tracy

Aren't you listening?


----------



## luvmy4brats

Why is everybody staring at me?


----------



## 908tracy

Can't you make them stop?


----------



## luvmy4brats

Did you hear that?


----------



## 908tracy

Hear what?


----------



## luvmy4brats

Why aren't you paying attention to me?


----------



## 908tracy

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a totsie pop?


----------



## luvmy4brats

What was I saying?


----------



## 908tracy

(lol) How many books have you read?


----------



## Toronto_LV

Why does love hurt?


----------



## 908tracy

Why is the grass green?


----------



## luvmy4brats

Where do babies come from?


----------



## Jeff

Your place or mine?


----------



## luvmy4brats

Do you feel like we're going in circles?


----------



## 908tracy

Do you wonder if it will ever stop?


----------



## luvmy4brats

Are you kidding?


----------



## ValeriGail

Are you serious?


----------



## DonnaFaz

Are you crazy?


----------



## luvmy4brats

Are we having fun yet?


----------



## sjc

Did you know that we've repeated some questions?
Do we care?
Isn't this fun?


----------



## luvmy4brats

Does it matter?


----------



## Jeff

What are the rules?


----------



## ValeriGail

There are rules?


----------



## luvmy4brats

Do we need rules?


----------



## Jeff

What would the world be like without rules?


----------



## luvmy4brats

Wouldn't it be fun?


----------



## Jeff

Wouldn't it be chaos?


----------



## Susan in VA

Can't a little chaos be fun too??


----------



## Alle Meine Entchen

mom, where are my shoes/coat/backpack/shirt/homework?


----------



## Susan in VA

Well, where did you leave them?


----------



## luvmy4brats

Can you feel the love tonight?


----------



## Jeff

Do you think you may be spending too much time with children?


----------



## luvmy4brats

Is that a rhetorical question?


----------



## Neo

Isn't it?


----------



## Jeff

Can't you tell by the order of questions?


----------



## luvmy4brats

Is it obvious?


----------



## Jeff

How many times per week do you have The Lion King, Cars, Madagascar, Shark Tales or the like, playing in the background?


----------



## luvmy4brats

Is there anything else to watch?


----------



## Meredith Sinclair

_Anything_ *else*?


----------



## Jeff

Do you think I may be spending too much time with children?


----------



## Susan in VA

How many grandkids do you have?


----------



## Jeff

How many kids do your grandkids have?


----------



## luvmy4brats

Doesn't everybody own the complete Disney library?


----------



## Susan in VA

Jeff said:


> How many kids do your grandkids do you have?


Huh??


----------



## Jeff

I had one grunch was the eggplant necessary?


----------



## Jeff

Did I really kill this thread with a typo?


----------



## BTackitt

Jeff said:


> How many times per week do you have The Lion King, Cars, Madagascar, Shark Tales or the like, playing in the background?


We do... but not for the kids.. Don'tcha know its the DH that wants to hear them?


----------



## Susan in VA

What IS eggplant necessary for?  

And what's a grunch?


----------



## Jeff

Susan in VA said:


> What IS eggplant necessary for?
> 
> And what's a grunch?


To what term does the following definition apply? "Two contradictory concepts juxtaposed against each other to create deep confusion in the hearer for the purpose of producing inaction and apathy.


----------



## luvmy4brats

Isn't that a little deep this late at night?


----------



## Jeff

Didn't the question beg a question?


----------



## Susan in VA

Jeff said:


> To what term does the following definition apply? "Two contradictory concepts juxtaposed against each other to create deep confusion in the hearer for the purpose of producing inaction and apathy.


Hmmm.... is that doublethink?


----------



## Jeff

Could it be George Orwell's definition of double-speak?


----------



## Susan in VA

Isn't that pretty much the same concept?


----------



## Jeff

luvmy4brats said:


> Isn't that a little deep this late at night?


----------



## intinst

Where, oh where has my little dog gone?


----------



## Margaret

Is it the one with the waggelly tail?

Oops, that was the wrong song, wasn't it?


----------



## 908tracy

How much is that doggie in the window?


----------



## Anju 

Will it ever quit hurting?


----------



## Toronto_LV

what is "need"... really........?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

Tea and cake or death?


----------



## 908tracy

What is at the end of your rainbow?


----------



## Ann in Arlington

For what shall it profit a man if he gain the whole world, and suffer the loss of his soul?


----------



## BTackitt

(finding bowl in teen's room)
What's this?


----------



## Susan in VA

Ann in Arlington said:


> For what shall it profit a man if he gain the whole world, and suffer the loss of his soul?


Too deep for early morning too.  What is it with you guys??


----------



## Jeff

You wouldn't be givin' me double talk now, wouldja, friend?


----------



## Alle Meine Entchen

dontcha wish your girlfriend was hot like me?


----------



## intinst

What's goin' on?


----------



## Jeff

Where have you been?


----------



## Tip10

And what have you been doing?


----------



## Margaret

And with whom have you been doing it?


----------



## Tip10

Does your mother know you are doing that?


----------



## 908tracy

Would you want your Mother to know you are doing that?


----------



## Alle Meine Entchen

should I be worried that I would rather eat the piece of choc cheesecake I found in my freezer than something more nutrious for lunch?


----------



## Tip10

Alle Meine Entchen said:


> should I be worried that I would rather eat the piece of choc cheesecake I found in my freezer than something more nutrious for lunch?


Like what a cheese omelet?

Let's see -- chocolate cheesecake -- ingredients: eggs, cheese, milk, -- okay -- have a cheese omelet, a glass of milk and some chocolate for desert!

Sound better??


----------



## luvmy4brats

Did you miss me?


----------



## Ann in Arlington

Why _was_ Mike so late to the DC meet?


----------



## Susan in VA

Ann, didya end up cooking dinner?


----------



## Ann in Arlington

Why should I cook dinner?


----------



## luvmy4brats

Didn't we eat enough?


----------



## B-Kay 1325

You all must have had a very good time, but why weren't there more pictures?


----------



## Susan in VA

Didn't I _tell_ you that it was too dark in there to get decent pictures?


----------



## sjc

Awww....Anju; does it hurt that much?

Another meet up...why can't I be so lucky?


----------



## ValeriGail

Why are the meet-ups always out of my area?


----------



## Meredith Sinclair

ValeriGail said:


> Why are the meet-ups always out of my area?


Austin one coming up May 23... well it is in Salado... but that is closer to you than ME... and I am going! 
Can ya go to that one?


----------



## ValeriGail

Meredith Sinclair said:


> Austin one coming up May 23... well it is in Salado... but that is closer to you than ME... and I am going!
> Can ya go to that one?


Can I ride with you?


----------



## Susan in VA

sjc, can't you _start_ one?


----------



## sjc

Will you come if I start one?


----------



## Jeff

Who needs a ride?


----------



## Margaret

Are you coming by way of Philadelphia?


----------



## Jeff

Where is Philadelphia, Texas?


----------



## 908tracy

No matter how careful you are about preparations.....

Why is it that the Fed Ex or UPS guy always shows up for a delivery when you cannot get to the door? Grrrrr!


----------



## HappyGuy

It's a pita you can't get there ... 

Can you, will you, hummus a song?


----------



## HappyGuy

Should we start a pun thread? Or would that o-pun a whole can of worms?


----------



## NogDog

Is anybody there?
Does anybody care?
Does anybody see what I see?


----------



## Susan in VA

sjc, can we have a quilt group meet?


----------



## ValeriGail

What do you see?


----------



## luvmy4brats

Who's coming to my yard sale next weekend?


----------



## Tip10

Why do you want to sell your yard?


----------



## luvmy4brats

Have you seen how big it is?


----------



## Tip10

Does it come with a brat to mow it??


----------



## luvmy4brats

Do you think I mow it?


----------



## Susan in VA

luvmy4brats said:


> Who's coming to my yard sale next weekend?


Can you move the yard to _this_ side of DC?


----------



## ValeriGail

want my brat to mow it?

He's in need of some money


----------



## luvmy4brats

Why pay someone when I can get my brat to do it for free?


----------



## akagriff

I'm having a garage sale in June.  I'll buy your yard if you buy my garage.


----------



## Susan in VA

How many more years am I going to put off decluttering my garage?


----------



## Jeff

Do I look like a fortune teller?


----------



## Susan in VA

Are you currently in Spain harassing Geoffrey?


----------



## Jeff

Does anybody know where I am?


----------



## luvmy4brats

Do you know where you are?


----------



## Susan in VA

I'm on page 437, where are _you_?


----------



## luvmy4brats

Where's Waldo Jeff?


----------



## Jeff

Is it possible to become lost in a maze of research?


----------



## Susan in VA

Did you forget to unwind the twine?


----------



## Jeff

Susan in VA said:


> I'm on page 437, where are _you_?


Oh, I missed this. I'm on page 40 of the WIP outline - will it ever end?


----------



## loonlover

Which way you gonna go?


----------



## luvmy4brats

Who ya gonna call?


----------



## Jeff

Who dat who say who dat who say who dat?


----------



## luvmy4brats

What language are you speaking?


----------



## Jeff

You've never heard of the New Orleans Saints?


----------



## telracs

luvmy4brats said:


> Why pay someone when I can get my brat to do it for free?


Didn't I hear that you're paying a brat to weed?


----------



## luvmy4brats

scarlet said:


> Didn't I hear that you're paying a brat to weed?


Is that what she said?


----------



## Margaret

Weren't you listening?


----------



## luvmy4brats

Am I supposed to listen to the BRATs?


----------



## Margaret

Why not?


----------



## Jeff

Is it true that from the mouths of brats, oft times come gems?


----------



## telracs

Or at least truths at times?


----------



## luvmy4brats

answers: yes, I pay the BRATS. Oldest BRAT gets $10 to mow the yard, younger ones get $5 to pull weeds. 

question:

Are you crying? ARE you crying? There's no crying in baseball!


----------



## DonnaFaz

Mrs. Robinson, you're trying to seduce me, aren't you?


----------



## Jeff

Where have you gone, Joe DiMaggio?


----------



## Susan in VA

What's the story, Morning Glory?
What's the tale, Nightingale?


----------



## telracs

Did you hear about Harvey and Kim?
Did she kiss him and cry?


----------



## Susan in VA

Did he pin the pin on? 
Or was he too shy?

(It figures _you'd_ know right away what that was from!)


----------



## Jeff

or did he go bye-bye like the birdie?


----------



## telracs

Did  you know that John Stamos and Gina Gershon starred in a revival of Bye Bye Birdie this year?


----------



## Jeff

Was it any good?


----------



## Susan in VA

Couldn't they just leave that one dead?


----------



## telracs

Do you want the truth?


----------



## Jeff

Is Dick Van **** dead?


----------



## telracs

Jeff said:


> Is Dick Van **** dead?


What?

Did you not see his recent interview when Mary Poppins opened in Chicago?


----------



## Jeff

Didn't you see Susan's question about leaving that one dead?


----------



## telracs

Wasn't she referring to the show, not one of its stars?


----------



## Susan in VA

Wasn't that clear?


----------



## Jeff

I intended to be funny; wasn't I?


----------



## Susan in VA

Is this all my fault? <sniffle>


----------



## telracs

Could it be that I'm too sensitive to "dead" jokes?


----------



## Jeff

Which way to the exit?


----------



## Susan in VA

Huh?


----------



## Jeff

Did you hear what I said?


----------



## Susan in VA

Oh. Yes. Isn't the exit over that-a-way? <points>


----------



## Jeff

What was the question?


----------



## Susan in VA

730 of 'em isn't enough to choose from??


----------



## telracs

Is there really more than one question?


----------



## Jeff

Did I nod off?


----------



## Susan in VA

Is it really almost midnight?  
Where did the day go?
Why oh why did I agree to being somewhere at 0830??


----------



## loonlover

Where are the restrooms?  (40th time the question has been asked in one night at entrance to the arena.)


----------



## Jeff

Are they near the exit?


----------



## Susan in VA

Why is the line for the ladies' room always at least three times as long as the one for the men's room?


----------



## Jeff

Why does it take women so long in the ladies' room?


----------



## loonlover

Why don't people see the ones that are in the hallway as you exit the arena floor?


----------



## Jeff

Why don't they put bigger signs on the restrooms that are in the hallway as you exit the arena floor?


----------



## telracs

Why don't concerts have intermissions?


----------



## telracs

Cobbie said:


> Why can't women in long lines go into the no-line men's restroom? <ducks and runs>


Don't you know that's exactly what we do?


----------



## Jeff

Can you do it while standing?


----------



## telracs

Do you doubt me?


----------



## Jeff

Do I dare?


----------



## BTackitt

Susan in VA said:


> Why is the line for the ladies' room always at least three times as long as the one for the men's room?





Jeff said:


> Why does it take women so long in the ladies' room?


OT for a sec, I had a friend write a paper about this exact thing once. On average it takes a woman 2-5 minutes to "do her business" once inside a stall. Woman also tend to carry "stuff" into the stall with them (which then they need to figure out where to put so it cannot be stolen while the pants are down) , while men will hand off bags (if shopping) and go in empty handed. Men take 45-90 seconds at a urinal. An average woman's restroom will have 3-4 stalls, while a men's room will have 2 stalls + 3 or 4 urinals. So they start out with more usable space in a men's room, and men are able to complete their business faster.

Back on Topic:
So, since everyone KNOWS women's restrooms always have lines, why don't restroom makers just give women more stalls to start with?


----------



## Ann in Arlington

And why don't they put a hook where you can still reach your purse when it's on the hook?

And in the handicap accessible stalls, why do they put the TP box practically on the floor?


----------



## Jeff

Why does this seem like way too much information?


----------



## loonlover

Did I open a can of worms with my first question about asking for the location of the restrooms?


----------



## Jeff

Wasn't that your intention?


----------



## loonlover

Do we always laugh about the number of times we get the question?  (And wish we got paid extra for answering it?)


----------



## B-Kay 1325

Why do they always have a mens room with a ladies room?  Why not put in in two ladies rooms for every one mens room?  Whatever happened to the power of supply and demand?


----------



## 908tracy

Why don't they listen to B-Kay's suggestion? (sounds wonderful to me!)


----------



## loonlover

If part of the concourse is closed, why do the men complain that they have to walk further to get to the nearest men's room?  Then take the elevator to come downstairs to find a water fountain when there was one right by the men's room?


----------



## Susan in VA

Why do some people find it acceptable to leave their chewing gum on water fountains?


----------



## Jeff

You're not a fan of ABC gum?


----------



## Susan in VA

Dare I ask what ABC stands for?


----------



## Jeff

Can anyone answer this question?


----------



## Ann in Arlington

(Already Been Chewed. . . .)

You didn't grow up around here didja?


----------



## Susan in VA

Eeeeeeeeeeewwww!



Ann in Arlington said:


> You didn't grow up around here didja?


Why, whatever gave you that idea?


----------



## intinst

Ann in Arlington said:


> You didn't grow up around here didja?


Or as I've heard here,
Yah ain't from round these parts, er yah?


----------



## Meredith Sinclair

Got anymore?


----------



## telracs

Meredith Sinclair said:


> Got anymore?


Got gum?


----------



## luvmy4brats

Got milk?


----------



## Jeff

Got halitosis?


----------



## telracs

Chocolate or Strawberry?


----------



## R. M. Reed

Why is Apple adding $130 to the price of an iPad for a cell phone radio, when I can buy a cell phone for $19.99?


----------



## intinst

Cobbie said:


> Answer with You Tube video in under three minutes.
> 
> How did Ann do that?


Could it be that she really is that good?


----------



## Ann in Arlington

Cobbie said:


> Answer with You Tube video in under three minutes.


Did it take that long?



intinst said:


> Could it be that she really is that good?


What do you think?


----------



## intinst

intinst said:


> *Could it be that she really is that good?*





Ann in Arlington said:


> Did it take that long?
> What do you think?





Cobbie said:


> Apparently so...lol.


Was that a rhetorical question? 
Mine was.


----------



## Ann in Arlington

intinst said:


> Was that a rhetorical question?


Or was it a rhetorical _answer_?

Wait. . . . .what?


----------



## Annalog

Why do the Shredded Wheat large biscuits come in packages of three when the serving size is two?


----------



## Susan in VA

Isn't it scary how many people flunk math?


----------



## Ann in Arlington

Why do hot dogs come in packages of 10, but the buns come in packages of 8?

How many of each do you have to buy to make it work out right?
(show your work )


----------



## Tip10

Ann in Arlington said:


> Why do hot dogs come in packages of 10, but the buns come in packages of 8?
> 
> How many of each do you have to buy to make it work out right?
> (show your work )


ONE -- I buy the Oscar Meyer Jumbo All Beef ones that come in packages of 8!    

Who in their right mind puts poultry in a hot dog


----------



## Ann in Arlington

Or in bacon?


----------



## Ann in Arlington

Did you know "Bacos" are kosher?


----------



## Ann in Arlington

Has anyone else noticed the questions aren't really very random?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

Wha' you talking about?


----------



## Brenda Carroll

How can you sell something that isn't yours?


----------



## sjc

Susan in VA said:


> sjc, can we have a quilt group meet?


Yay...Can we bring out Kindles and our Quilts?


----------



## Susan in VA

Ann in Arlington said:


> Why do hot dogs come in packages of 10, but the buns come in packages of 8?
> 
> How many of each do you have to buy to make it work out right?
> (show your work )


Just one of each, because in any crowd of ten people there are probably two who are on a low-carb diet and will just eat the hot dogs without a bun anyway. 

How much longer until the evenings are warm enough to grill outdoors again?


----------



## telracs

what kind of sub did you get?


----------



## Jeff

How much warmer do you need it to be?


----------



## Susan in VA

scarlet said:


> what kind of sub did you get?


Turkey on whole-grain, why do you ask?


----------



## Susan in VA

Jeff said:


> How much warmer do you need it to be?


Do you think evenings in the low 50's are warm enough for outdoor dinner??


----------



## Jeff

If it's 61 right now in McGregor is that warm enough?


----------



## Susan in VA

Did you get your cover thingy fixed?


----------



## DonnaFaz

does your dog have fleas?


----------



## Margaret

Isn't there a song about that?


----------



## Geoffrey

What kind of gift do you want from Madrid?


----------



## Anju 

Is it done yet?


----------



## Ann in Arlington

Geoffrey's bringing gifts from Madrid?  How do we place an order?


----------



## Jeff

Do you think Geoffrey could fit Penélope Cruz in his carry on baggage?


----------



## 908tracy

Do I think this thread is a hoot?

(absolutely!)


----------



## Tip10

If Geoffrey fit Penelope Cruz AND Antonino Banderas in his carry on baggage do you think there would be some carrying on?


----------



## crebel

Why are my barn swallows nesting in the garage instead of the barn?


----------



## Tip10

They have garages in Iowa?? -- I thought everything was a barn in disguise....


----------



## loca

Why do we wake up early?


----------



## Susan in VA

Why don't we wake up on time?


----------



## Susan in VA

Jeff said:


> Do you think Geoffrey could fit Penélope Cruz in his carry on baggage?





Cobbie said:


> Do you think Geoffrey could fit Antonio Banderas in his carry on baggage? (Bet he'd bring mine before yours. )


Did you really want me to spill my tea??


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

Why do woot-offs happen when my cash flow is just a trickle?


----------



## Alle Meine Entchen

Do your ears hang low?


----------



## telracs

What's a "woot-off"?


----------



## BTackitt

Alle Meine Entchen said:


> Do your ears hang low?


Do they waggle to and fro?


----------



## sjc

Where's Waldo?


----------



## crca56

why don't a cat have a barbwire tail?


----------



## sjc

Isn't everyone going to miss Anju so much?


----------



## telracs

How can it hurt so bad to lose someone I've never met?


----------



## sjc

Don't we all feel like we _knew_ her? 
Didn't she have that wonderful effect on everyone?


----------



## luvmy4brats

Why do I feel I'm missing a piece of me I didn't know I had.


----------



## Marguerite

what did she die of?  How is her husband?  does anyone know?


----------



## crebel

Weren't we blessed to know her even for a little while?


----------



## 908tracy

Weren't we blessed to know her even if only via computer and these wonderful boards? =)


----------



## Wisteria Clematis

Anju No. 469 said:


> Is it done yet?


Oh. This was Dona's last question (yesterday) in this thread. Seeing it in retrospect I wonder if she knew or suspected what was coming?

Now KB has expanded beyond this world, we have a much loved member who has crossed through the veil. Our love goes with you, Dona.


----------



## Jeff

Is that all there is?


----------



## telracs

Why does the entire IT department travel as a pack?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

scarlet said:


> Why does the entire IT department travel as a pack?


Could it be because nerds can't talk to girls and the pack mentality started in high school?


----------



## telracs

mom133d said:


> Could it be because nerds can't talk to girls and the pack mentality started in high school?


No, half of our IT department IS girls?

What does one call a group of IT people?


----------



## LaRita

An ITeration?


----------



## Brenda Carroll

ITITES?

Does anyone know how far is too far?


----------



## Jeff

A nye of nerds?


----------



## Margaret

A gaggle of geeks?


----------



## telracs

What's a nye?


----------



## Jeff

scarlet said:


> What's a nye?


What's a collective noun that begins with the letter N?


----------



## Annalog

What is a number?


----------



## Annalog

Brendan Carroll said:


> ITITES? Does anyone know how far is too far?


Is it a lot farther than not far enough?


----------



## Ann in Arlington

You're so vain, you probably think this song is about you, don't you?  DON'T You?


----------



## Ann in Arlington

How are things in Glocca Morra?


----------



## telracs

Where's the Orchestra?


----------



## luvmy4brats

Who's afraid of the big, bad wolf?


----------



## telracs

Would you like to hear a little "Time Warp"?


----------



## Jeff

Is that willow tree still weeping there?


----------



## Susan in VA

How did that darn moth get into my kitchen?!?


----------



## Alle Meine Entchen

why is the kitchen messy right before company comes over?


----------



## Margaret

Does your chewing gum lose its flavor on the bedpost overnight?


----------



## Annalog

If your mother says, "Don't chew it," do you swallow it in spite?


----------



## telracs

what the heck is going on with amazon and my credit card?


----------



## Marguerite

Why do little girls on a sleep over NEVER want to go to sleep?


----------



## CCrooks

Is it supposed to be making that weird noise?


----------



## Brenda Carroll

Nuc doc yuk d'pol?

(That's Klingon for 'where's the chocolate?' )


----------



## Alle Meine Entchen

do klingons even know what chocolate is?


----------



## telracs

Isn't knowledge of chocolate required for sentience?


----------



## Brenda Carroll

Did you hear about the new chocolate baby formula for toddlers?


----------



## telracs

Brendan Carroll said:


> Did you hear about the new chocolate baby formula for toddlers?


Do you want to make me gag?


----------



## Marguerite

What did I ever do before children?


----------



## jrcalvo

Margaret said:


> A gaggle of geeks?


Wait, aren't geeks (including me ) like crows... shouldn't it be a murder of geeks?


----------



## DonnaFaz

Has anyone seen my reading glasses?


----------



## telracs

DonnaFaz said:


> Has anyone seen my reading glasses?


Have you looked on the top of your head?


----------



## Tip10

Has anyone seen my head?


----------



## Susan in VA

scarlet said:


> Isn't knowledge of chocolate required for sentience?


  

Can somebody tell me what's wrong with the steam thingy on my iron?


----------



## Victorine

Ha ha ha, this thread cracks me up.

And for my random question... What's an iron?  

Vicki


----------



## Tip10

Ummm, they are something you use to hit little white balls all over the countryside so you have to chase after them?

What does a steam thingy have to do with it?


----------



## telracs

Tip10 said:


> Ummm, they are something you use to hit little white balls all over the countryside so you have to chase after them?
> 
> What does a steam thingy have to do with it?


Doesn't the steam thingy clean the balls after they land in the sand?


----------



## Margaret

jrcalvo said:


> shouldn't it be a murder of geeks?


Wouldn't that be a crime?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

Whatcha whatcha want?


----------



## intinst

Why do the nurses ask if you were asleep when they come in at 3 AM with your sleeping medication?


----------



## Brenda Carroll

Why ask why?


----------



## CCrooks

Why not?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

When you dream, what do you dream about?


----------



## Annalog

Is there anything I haven't dreamed about?


----------



## Annalog

Is chicken soup the universal comfort/get well food?


----------



## Annalog

Why does time fly when you are having fun?


----------



## Margaret

Why does it always seem to take longer to get to a place than it does to get back home again?


----------



## jrcalvo

Annalog said:


> Is chicken soup the universal comfort/get well food?


Is there anything dark chocolate won't cure?


----------



## Annalog

jrcalvo said:


> Is there anything dark chocolate won't cure?


What do people do who are allergic to chocolate?
Does carob have the same effects?


----------



## BTackitt

Are people really honest?


----------



## Tip10

Are there any honest people left?


----------



## telracs

why is the weather always lousy on my day off?


----------



## Angela

Why are older autos referred to as "late models" when they were built earlier than the new ones?


----------



## DonnaFaz

Excuse me....got any paper over there you could slip under the stall?


----------



## CCrooks

Won't you be my neighbor?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

Mary, Mary, Where you going to?


----------



## DonnaFaz

Jenny, Jenny, who can I turn to?


----------



## CCrooks

Where have all the cowboys gone?


----------



## MAGreen

What's the square root of pie?


----------



## Margaret

Is that all there is?


----------



## Tip10

If a turtle doesn't have a shell is it homeless or naked?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

If a person on house arrest lives in an RV, can they go anywhere they want?


----------



## Susan in VA

Cobbie said:


> Do I really have to get off KB today?


Apparently not. (90 mins after your post )

Can I get through the weekend without having to go grocery shopping today?


----------



## Victorine

Why did I walk into this room?


----------



## vickir

Do you always answer a question with a question?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

Don't you?

And is anyone else reminded of the "question game" on 'Whose Line is it Anyway?'?


----------



## Annalog

Tip10 said:


> If a turtle doesn't have a shell is it homeless or naked?


Can a turtle live without a shell?


----------



## CCrooks

What would it be like to wear a burqa?


----------



## intinst

CCrooks said:


> What would it be like to wear a burqa?


What would it be like to have to wear a burqa?


----------



## telracs

Is anyone else interested in the fact that Meat Loaf has a new CD out?


----------



## CCrooks

Is anyone else hungry?


----------



## Susan in VA

Was it the mention of meat loaf that made you hungry?


----------



## telracs

do you know how bad it feels to snort rice out your nose?


----------



## Susan in VA

Don't you know that it's dangerous to eat or drink while surfing KB?


----------



## telracs

don't *you* know that i have to multitask?


----------



## Jeff

Did you know that smoking a pipe while surfing KB can produce crotchless Wranglers?


----------



## telracs

do you realize how disturbing that image is?


----------



## Jeff

scarlet said:


> do you realize how disturbing that image is?


Do you realize how painful that process is?


----------



## Susan in VA

scarlet said:


> don't *you* know that i have to multitask?


Don't you ever take breaks??



Jeff said:


> Did you know that smoking a pipe while surfing KB can produce crotchless Wranglers?


Don't they sell those in the Frederick's catalogue?


----------



## intinst

Jeff said:


> Did you know that smoking a pipe while surfing KB can produce crotchless Wranglers?


(No but I have shirts that will never be the same.)
Why do we try anyway?


----------



## intinst

Susan in VA said:


> Don't they sell those in the Frederick's catalogue?


Nope, custom made
Why do you ask?


----------



## Jeff

intinst said:


> Why do we try anyway?


Why don't they print a warning on pipes disclosing that blowing into the stem produces results similar to a small volcanic eruption?


----------



## Susan in VA

Jeff said:


> Why don't they print a warning on pipes disclosing that blowing into the stem produces results similar to a small volcanic eruption?


Really? Can you stop air traffic with it?


----------



## Jeff

Have you tried to book a flight from London today?


----------



## telracs

Intinst, did you like my latest cheerleader?


----------



## Marguerite

new avatar?


----------



## intinst

scarlet said:


> Intinst, did you like my latest cheerleader?


Was it the one in the bump thread she was cute


----------



## Marguerite

why do all the flowers die?


----------



## telracs

Marguerite said:


> why do all the flowers die?


so we appreciate them more?


----------



## sjc

Why does summer always fly by and winter seem to last forever?


----------



## telracs

How much trouble will I get into if I call in sick to work today?


----------



## Susan in VA

Where was everybody yesterday??


----------



## Jeff

I know where I was; where were you?


----------



## Susan in VA

Working and doing school stuff.

But I meant why didn't anyone post here all day?


----------



## Jeff

You're not counting Scarlet?


----------



## Tip10

If time is of the essence what does it smell like?


----------



## Susan in VA

Jeff said:


> You're not counting Scarlet?


Scarlet and sjc posted at two in the morning... before going to bed... in my book that counts as the previous day. Just like, if I post after midnight tonight, it will still be _today_.

Does that make sense?


----------



## Susan in VA

Tip10 said:


> If time is of the essence what does it smell like?


Like a minute steak?


----------



## intinst

What do you mean, no one posted? What am I, chopped liver?


----------



## telracs

intinst said:


> What do you mean, no one posted? What am I, chopped liver?


I think she meant on the random question thread. Didn't you Susan?

Oh, and for the record, I agree with Susan, 2 am posts by me count for the day before, not that day. It's not today until I get some sleep.


----------



## Alle Meine Entchen

what is it about a peanut butter sandwich that makes it so satisfying?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

the bananas?


----------



## crebel

The marshmallow creme?


----------



## telracs

the toasty bread?


----------



## Annalog

The honey?


----------



## CCrooks

The chopped liver?


----------



## telracs

what am i, chopped liver?


----------



## Angela

Why does it says on a bottle of sleeping tablets "caution, may cause drowsiness?"


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

Why do the side effects of medication sound worse than the symptoms?


----------



## Susan in VA

scarlet said:


> I think she meant on the random question thread. Didn't you Susan?


Yes, of course. 

How do I shorten the fussy-eater phase that DD is going through?


----------



## telracs

why do filmmakers feel compelled to cut scenes from Shakespearean plays when recording, even when the production they are recording was uncut?


----------



## Annalog

Will the electricity go off again?


----------



## Susan in VA

Annalog said:


> Will the electricity go off again?


Yours too??


----------



## telracs

why can't I find a version of midsummer night's dream that i like?


----------



## sjc

Susan in VA said:


> Scarlet and sjc posted at two in the morning... before going to bed... in my book that counts as the previous day. Just like, if I post after midnight tonight, it will still be _today_.
> 
> Does that make sense?


Happy to oblige. 
I've been wicked busy this week. Running around getting ready for my trip. Busy a work. Planning DD's birthday. Fridge was bare: had to shop (ugghh). OK...now to keep with the theme of this thread:

DH...can I get a maid?


----------



## sjc

Angela said:


> Why does it says on a bottle of sleeping tablets "caution, may cause drowsiness?"


For the same reason the McDonald's got sued for (a few years back). Some fool didn't know his hot coffee was going to be hot; so now they put: caution hot...

In the sleep aid case: Some idiot will take them in broad daylight; get drowsy behind the wheel...and SUE.
OK...in keeping with the thread:

Why are so many sue happy? What have we become?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

Did any one get the number of that truck?


----------



## Susan in VA

Did it drive over your rosebushes?


----------



## Annalog

How old was the driver of the white vehicle that drove through our front fence late on a Friday night, left their bumper in our yard, drove over some large bushes and small trees, and back onto the road via our neighbor's driveway? Was anyone else in the vehicle? Had they been drinking? Did they miss the gas and electric meters on purpose or were they just lucky? Why didn't they ever come back for their bumper? Why wasn't it the bumper with the license plate? Why do I still remember the details after a few years?


----------



## Tip10

Can I have my bumper back?  

Jus' kidding...


----------



## Alle Meine Entchen

Annalog said:


> How old was the driver of the white vehicle that drove through our front fence late on a Friday night, left their bumper in our yard, drove over some large bushes and small trees, and back onto the road via our neighbor's driveway? Was anyone else in the vehicle? Had they been drinking? Did they miss the gas and electric meters on purpose or were they just lucky? Why didn't they ever come back for their bumper? Why wasn't it the bumper with the license plate? Why do I still remember the details after a few years?


Hey, how do you know how my brothers drive?


----------



## Annalog

Tip10 said:



> Can I have my bumper back?
> 
> Jus' kidding...


Too late! Why didn't you ask a couple years ago before we finally decided to throw it away? 



Alle Meine Entchen said:


> Hey, how do you know how my brothers drive?


Are they the ones who like going 50+ miles per hour down curving dirt roads?


----------



## Marguerite

is there a purpose to all of this?


----------



## telracs

Marguerite said:


> is there a purpose to all of this?


your purpose, my purpose or THE purpose?


----------



## ashash

if money cant buy happiness then why am i so happy when i have it? lol


----------



## DonnaFaz

Maybe money CAN'T buy happiness, but can it buy me love?


----------



## Alle Meine Entchen

Annalog said:


> Are they the ones who like going 50+ miles per hour down curving dirt roads?


Doesn't everyone?


----------



## Susan in VA

What evil person invented the idea of in-text citations?


----------



## Tip10

If Quitters Never Win,
and Winners Never Quit, 
then who is the fool who said,
"Quit while you're ahead"?


----------



## Annalog

Susan in VA said:


> What evil person invented the idea of in-text citations?


Do Strunk and White know?


----------



## sjc

Why does some fool always wake me up on the weekends?  Don't they know people like to sleep in?


----------



## Susan in VA

Why do the wrong number calls from someone who doesn't speak English always happen between 2 and 6 a.m.?


----------



## Jeff

Why is the world round?


----------



## caracara

Can something be true if we merely prove it is not false?


----------



## Alle Meine Entchen

How do toddlers know exactly what you need before you know you need it?  And why do they carry it off and hide it from you?


----------



## telracs

how many different people can want me to do something for them at the same time?


----------



## Margaret

Why do today what you can put off until tomorrow?


----------



## Susan in VA

Alle Meine Entchen said:


> How do toddlers know exactly what you need before you know you need it? And why do they carry it off and hide it from you?


They learn the skill from cats, of course. 

Am I ever going to catch up on all these threads after being offline so much??


----------



## Susan in VA

Cobbie said:


> Of course you can if you want to be cross-eyed?


I think some of them will just have to remain unread. 



Cobbie said:


> Why do I order mail-order plants knowing full well I'll be out of the planting mood when they arrive?


Why don't you just go to the local plant nursery?


----------



## telracs

did they overcharge me for my salad?


----------



## Susan in VA

Cobbie said:


> because I overbought and over-planted


Why is it that when we plant_ one_ tomato plant, we get three tomatoes all season, and when we plan for that and plant_ five_, we get 50 tomatoes per plant?

(And did I ask that before? I still don't know the answer, though.)


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

Why are the people you want to ignore unavoidable?


----------



## Margaret

Why are some questions unanswerable?


----------



## BTackitt

Where is UPS with my package


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

How can I make some extra money to pay for this playset?


----------



## Tip10

Isn't that a dangerous question?


----------



## Jeff

Wouldn't the answer be more dangerous than the question?


----------



## telracs

Cobbie said:


> Why is something lost always in the last place you look?


Because after you find it you stop looking?


----------



## egh34

Seriously?


----------



## Alle Meine Entchen

Why am I so tired?


----------



## intinst

You're kidding, right? Right?


----------



## Susan in VA

Is that all??


----------



## Annalog

Is anyone home?


----------



## telracs

how did i get this black and blue?


----------



## Susan in VA

What new sport did you take up?


----------



## Annalog

Was it mountain climbing?


----------



## telracs

Annalog said:


> Was it mountain climbing?


are you kidding?


----------



## Annalog

scarlet said:


> are you kidding?


Yes.  Can you think of a sport more likely to result in multiple unexpected bruises?

EDIT: At least I suspect that if I tried it I would be black and blue all over.

What is black and white and red all over?


----------



## telracs

Annalog said:


> Yes.  Can you think of a sport more likely to result in multiple unexpected bruises?


can you think of one I'm less likely to participate in?



Annalog said:


> EDIT: At least I suspect that if I tried it I would be black and blue all over.


you and me both



Annalog said:


> What is black and white and red all over?


a sunburned zebra?


----------



## Susan in VA

Annalog said:


> What is black and white and red all over?


In a new twist on the old answer: a Kindle! 

Why are the plants I put into hanging baskets never as lush and full as the ones they sell at the plant nurseries?


----------



## telracs

Susan in VA said:


> In a new twist on the old answer: a Kindle!
> 
> Why are the plants I put into hanging baskets never as lush and full as the ones they sell at the plant nurseries?


but isn't a kindle GREY and white?


----------



## Susan in VA

If you just look at the _letters_ and ignore the background part of the screen... 

And actually, mine IS black and white.










So there. 

How did I manage to spend an hour on KB without noticing??


----------



## telracs

Susan in VA said:


> If you just look at the _letters_ and ignore the background part of the screen...
> 
> How did I manage to spend an hour on KB without noticing??


Just lucky?


----------



## Susan in VA

scarlet said:


> Just lucky?


Just _lazy_ is more like it. I don't feel like doing any of the things on my list for today.

How do I get motivated?


----------



## Jeff

Susan in VA said:


> Why are the plants I put into hanging baskets never as lush and full as the ones they sell at the plant nurseries?


Have you tried Miracle Grow?


----------



## Susan in VA

Yes.

Besides, the weeds do just fine without benefit of fertilizer  --  what do they know that my flowers don't?


----------



## intinst

Susan in VA said:


> Just _lazy_ is more like it. I don't feel like doing any of the things on my list for today.
> 
> How do I get motivated?


Why do you want to do so?


----------



## Susan in VA

intinst said:


> Why do you want to do so?


Are you volunteering to do my laundry and wash my dishes and deal with my paperwork?


----------



## intinst

Things are slow for me today, When can you bring them to Little Rock?


----------



## Susan in VA

Hmmm..... can I get through all of it in less time than it would take me to drive the 1005 miles?


----------



## telracs

did the person who designed the top chef DC poster ever actually set foot in DC?

and

why can't people tell the difference between Arlington and DC?


----------



## Ann in Arlington

There's a difference between Arlington and DC?

Oh, yeah, I remember. . .when WE call the police they come. . . . . . .

(Actually, originally, Arlington was part of DC. . . . but at some point they decided they didn't need/want the part on this side of the river.  Their loss!)

How about that?


----------



## drenee

Whose junk pile piece of chhh....eville is this?
Did you boys come here to race, or just kiss?
Don't you want to know what I've got underneath my hood?


----------



## telracs

It's called Arlington National Cemetery, isn't it?


----------



## telracs

Cobbie said:


> Do I have to have a question to post here?


Why do you ask?


----------



## telracs

Did you know there's a second season of Life After People?


----------



## loonlover

How did I get up and be at work at 7AM all those years?  And be functional?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

coffee?


----------



## Ann in Arlington

_Were_ you functional? 

(Only 'cause DH gets up and goes to work everyday by 8, but he's not really awake until about 11. . . .if he's supposed to go somewhere else than usual first thing in the morning, well, he'll probably miss the exit at least once 'cause he's on 'internal autopilot'.)


----------



## intinst

loonlover said:


> How did I get up and be at work at 7AM all those years? And be functional?


An even bigger question, how did I do it at 7, 5, and sometimes 3:30 AM?
(Of course, other than saying hello or good morning, no one at work would talk to me for the first couple of hours, till I had had several cups of coffee. Seems I was a bit grumpy to be around.) 








Poor LL, she still puts up with it and claims to love me. Only explanation that I can come up with as well.


----------



## telracs

What's love got to do, got to do with it?
What's love, but a second hand emotion?


----------



## BTackitt

Why do we bake cookies and cook bacon?


----------



## Margaret

How cool is that avitar, BTackitt?


----------



## telracs

Who ate the last doughnut?


----------



## intinst

Why did it take so long for someone to start this thread up again?

(Love your new avatar, BTacket!)


----------



## telracs

Who hid the thread for so long?


Spoiler



personally, i blame the davids


----------



## DonnaFaz

Is it okay if I agree with you, Scarlet?


----------



## telracs

DonnaFaz said:


> Is it okay if I agree with you, Scarlet?


I don't think anyone will object, do you?


----------



## DonnaFaz

Will we care if they do?


----------



## telracs

DonnaFaz said:


> Will we care if they do?


I won't, will you?


----------



## Susan in VA

What took you guys so long to revive this thread?


----------



## Ann in Arlington

Wasn't it supposed to be your job?


----------



## Susan in VA

Who, me?


----------



## Margaret

Why is it always someone else's fault?


----------



## Susan in VA

'Cause I wasn't here for much of June.  

Can't everyone just get along?


----------



## Tip10

What if all they want is a short?


----------



## Ann in Arlington

Tip10 said:


> What if all they want is a short?


Anyone notice this is the first "truly" random question here in quite a while?


----------



## caracara

Why is everyone on here so entertaining (or distracting)?


----------



## Susan in VA

Ann in Arlington said:


> Anyone notice this is the first "truly" random question here in quite a while?


It's directly related to the question preceding it, so why is it random?


----------



## Jeff

Why do birds fall down from the sky?


----------



## Susan in VA

See, now that's a random one.


Do they?

Might it be something in the atmosphere over Texas?


----------



## Jeff

Did you know that random logic is the basic of chaos theory?


----------



## Susan in VA

Do I even want to _think _about chaos theory before my second cup of tea?


----------



## Jeff

Do you want a random answer?


----------



## Susan in VA

Why not?


----------



## Tip10

Does IHOP serve their pancakes right side up or upside down?


----------



## Jeff

Is that the answer or the question?


----------



## Tip10

Yes!?!


----------



## Alle Meine Entchen

Why do birds suddenly appear, every time, you are near?


----------



## Margaret

Alle Meine Entchen said:


> Why do birds suddenly appear, every time, you are near?


Are they seagulls looking to swipe your sandwich?


----------



## Ann in Arlington

Susan in VA said:


> It's directly related to the question preceding it, so why is it random?


Is it related?

(never mind. . . I hadn't had my caffeine yet.  )


----------



## BTackitt

(Thanks on the avatar compliments I love it too!)

Would you like fries with that?


----------



## caracara

No, but do you have a chocolate shake?


----------



## telracs

How many different walks can my sister make me sign up for this autumn?


Spoiler



currently 3, the alzheimer's walk, the Komen walk and the making strides. I think they'll be a 4th....


----------



## BTackitt

Why does time pass slowly when you are desperate for it to fly, and fly when you want it to slow down?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

Why does everything make sense during training but is a complete mystery the second you walk out of the class?


----------



## BTackitt

Is that what I have to look forward to in nursing school?


----------



## intinst

Cobbie said:


> Why can't I do anything except watch BTackitt's avatar?


It is fascinating, isn't it?


----------



## vikingwarrior22

Cobbie said:


> Why can't I do anything except watch BTackitt's avatar?


Is it like carrying on a conversation with Brendan Carroll?


----------



## Susan in VA

Margaret said:


> Are they seagulls looking to swipe your sandwich?


LOL!



scarlet said:


> How many different walks can my sister make me sign up for this autumn?
> 
> 
> Spoiler
> 
> 
> 
> currently 3, the alzheimer's walk, the Komen walk and the making strides. I think they'll be a 4th....


Is she MAKING you sign up? Or are we talking about gentle sisterly persuasion?



vikingwarrior22 said:


> Is it like carrying on a conversation with Brendan Carroll?


Is anything on earth quite like that?


----------



## BTackitt

( I am glad my avatar is so amusing.. My DS#2 loves it, but he is easily amused... I have a pen with a bead attached on a pin at the non-writing end, and he will hold my pen and just sit and spin the bead  for like 10 minutes)

Aren't cheap amusements often the most fun?


----------



## telracs

How do you say no to a sister who is trying to get you to exercise and raise money for good causes?


----------



## Susan in VA

scarlet said:


> How do you say no to a sister who is trying to get you to exercise and raise money for good causes?


By telling her that if _she _walks it and you don't, you can sponsor her?

By telling her that you get plenty of walking time on your excursions already?


----------



## telracs

Susan in VA said:


> By telling her that if _she _walks it and you don't, you can sponsor her?
> 
> By telling her that you get plenty of walking time on your excursions already?


But what if it's more fun to walk then to sponsor and I don't have anything doing this autumn?

btw, the komen walk has what they call "sleep for the cause" instead of walking you give them extra money and you sleep in and still ask people for donations.


----------



## Susan in VA

scarlet said:


> btw, the komen walk has what they call "sleep for the cause" instead of walking you give them extra money and you sleep in and still ask people for donations.


Yep, they did that here too, the local radio station suggested a "sleep in for the cure" day and I thought it was something that the station had sponsored somehow.

So have you found a fourth walk yet?


----------



## telracs

Susan in VA said:


> Yep, they did that here too, the local radio station suggested a "sleep in for the cure" day and I thought it was something that the station had sponsored somehow.
> 
> So have you found a fourth walk yet?


Oh, was I unclear?

There are 4 walks, but I don't remember what the fourth is...


----------



## telracs

Cobbie said:


> Why do I take one route to a destination and a different route home?


Because that way you might have a chance to take more pictures?


----------



## lonestar

Who wants to know?


----------



## intinst

Who's on first?


----------



## telracs

intinst said:


> Who's on first?


Repeating ourselves, aren't we?


----------



## Cindy416

Why is there Braille on the ATM at the drive-through?


----------



## Cindy416

Why do stores that are open 24/7 have locks on the doors?


----------



## Tip10

Why is it when you see something truly worthy of taking a picture of you never have your camera with you?


----------



## Susan in VA

...  and even when you do, that the battery always chooses that moment to quit?


----------



## BTackitt

Why do they still make commercials louder than a tv show when everyone knows you mute/skip them anyway?


----------



## lonestar

What has happened to common sense?


----------



## Susan in VA

Could it be in the same place as all those single socks that the dryer spirits away?


----------



## BTackitt

Are you sure it's the dryer and not the washer?


----------



## Susan in VA

Is one ever really sure of anything?


----------



## lonestar

Who decides what's wrong and what's right?


----------



## telracs

Cobbie said:


> Why don't I take my camera with me?


Why don't you just use your PHONE?


----------



## lonestar

scarlet said:


> Why don't you just use your PHONE?


Was I supposed to call someone?


----------



## telracs

Cobbie said:


> Why has someone near and dear to me told me not to do that?


When have you actually listened to me?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

What happened to common sense and logic?


----------



## Susan in VA

scarlet said:


> Why don't you just use your PHONE?


... says the woman who refuses to carry one... 

Do you suppose I should break down and finally get a new cell phone after 7 years?


----------



## lonestar

Do you need one?


----------



## Ann in Arlington

Who's getting a new Kindle 3?


----------



## lonestar

I don't know, who?


----------



## Annalog

Are the PDF improvements important enough? Will those improvements be updated for the K2s?


----------



## telracs

Cobbie said:


> WHAT Do you mean there is actually someone who _doesn't_ carry a phone?


You want me to join the 21st century?


----------



## telracs

Cobbie said:


> Are we twins?
> 
> (I almost put "21st century" in my previous question.)


Well, you're not quite old enough to be my mom, are you?


----------



## telracs

We're both 25, aren't we?


----------



## telracs

You mean I'm not supposed to eat 10 white chocolate covered oreos in one sitting?


----------



## lonestar

You meant 20 didn't you?


----------



## Ann in Arlington

Is it August 27 yet?


----------



## telracs

lonestar said:


> You meant 20 didn't you?





Cobbie said:


> Didn't she mean 25?


Are we talking our ages or how many Oreos I've eaten?


----------



## lonestar

scarlet said:


> Are we talking our ages or how many Oreos I've eaten?


You ate the Oreos!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!?


----------



## Michael Crane

Is it the weekend yet?


----------



## telracs

lonestar said:


> You ate the Oreos!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!?


Why? Are you missing some?


----------



## Michael Crane

Somebody has Oreos and isn't sharing!!!


----------



## telracs

http://www.nutsonline.com/images/items/05255l1437.jpg

maybe they have some?


----------



## lonestar

Where can I get those?


----------



## Michael Crane

Can I go home yet?


----------



## Tip10

Sure, but where is there?


----------



## telracs

Here?

or maybe?

here?


----------



## telracs

Cobbie said:


> Why am I getting confused and dizzy?


Getting?


----------



## telracs

Cobbie said:


> Lol...Where's Susan when I need her?


Eating oreos?


----------



## Tip10

scarlet said:


> Eating oreos?


Chocolate covered ones?

White chocolate or dark?


----------



## Vegas_Asian

So what would u say if I told u that someone ate all the Oreos? Theoretically


----------



## telracs

Tip10 said:


> Chocolate covered ones?
> 
> White chocolate or dark?


Why would anyone eat ones that weren't chocolate covered?

And didn't you know that I'm a white chocolate girl?


----------



## Vegas_Asian

If anyone asks...? I didn't touch the Oreos.


----------



## telracs

Vegas_Asian said:


> If anyone asks...? I didn't touch the Oreos.


But did you EAT them?


----------



## Vegas_Asian

would devour be a better word?


----------



## lonestar

Are there ANY left?


----------



## telracs

Who wants to know?


----------



## lonestar

Who thinks Scarlet has the Oreos?


----------



## telracs

what about oreo chocolate cookie bark?


----------



## telracs

Did you know that Godiva starts their summer clearance sale on Monday?


----------



## telracs

Oh, and has anyone else noticed that our "random" question thread ain't really all that random?


----------



## telracs

You think you're pretty funny, don't you?


----------



## Jeff

Is anybody there? Does anybody care?


----------



## telracs

Who'd dare ban us?

And would we listen if they did?


----------



## telracs

Jeff said:


> Is anybody there? Does anybody care?


John, John, is that you carrying on? John?



Spoiler



okay, i admit my line is from earlier in the play, but it is a question


----------



## Debra Purdy Kong

Why does time feel like it's speeding up when, really, isn't it exactly the same as it was when we were born?


----------



## telracs

Debra Purdy Kong said:


> Why does time feel like it's speeding up when, really, isn't it exactly the same as it was when we were born?


Maybe it's a correlary to Einstein's Theory of Relativity?


----------



## Annalog

Why does cat hair have to be attracted to PVC pipe?

Why does DH's cat, Dusty Devil, always have to be in the way when I am trying to work?


----------



## lonestar

Does lint only stick to things that are black?


----------



## lonestar

Why is it called a grapefruit?


----------



## telracs

How many non-musical movies have an overture, an intermission and an entr'acte?


----------



## Someone Nameless

Why do I wish my life away?  Every Monday I wish for the weekend but every weekend I wish time would slow down!


----------



## Michael Crane

Is Monday over, yet?


----------



## lonestar

Who left the door open?


----------



## Michael Crane

Did you??


----------



## Michael Crane

Kindle Gracie said:


> Yep! But it's no the weekend yet.


Does that mean I can go home until it is?


----------



## Tip10

In another year or two its gonna be ALL WEEKENDS....can I last that long?


----------



## Michael Crane

If it's nothing but weekends, does that mean Monday doesn't exist?


----------



## Someone Nameless

michael_crane said:


> If it's nothing but weekends, does that mean Monday doesn't exist?


Will it just be Friday, Saturday and Sunday over and over again?


----------



## Tip10

Cobbie said:


> What will you do with yourself when it's "ALL WEEKENDS"?


PLAY!!! Isn't that what one does on weekends?


----------



## lonestar

Is there enough beer for that?


----------



## Michael Crane

lonestar said:


> Is there enough beer for that?


Are we running low?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

Is it time for a beer run?


----------



## Tip10

You buying?


----------



## telracs

May I just have a diet coke?


----------



## Margaret

scarlet said:


> May I just have a diet coke?


Can we add rum?


----------



## Michael Crane

Where's the rum??


----------



## Michael Crane

Are they reputable?


----------



## Michael Crane

I don't... maybe it's the rum talking?


----------



## telracs

When did we become rum runners?


----------



## lonestar

Can we include tequila in the run?


----------



## Susan in VA

I'm away for a few days, and this thread turns into a scene from Cheers??

And scarlet, what's the answer to the non-musical question?


----------



## telracs

Susan in VA said:


> I'm away for a few days, and this thread turns into a scene from Cheers??


Where have you been?



Spoiler



and it's been more than a few days!





Susan in VA said:


> And scarlet, what's the answer to the non-musical question?


I only know of the Ten Commandments. Are there any more?


----------



## telracs

Cobbie said:


> And you thought you could turn your back and we would behave?
> 
> Silly girl....
> 
> (lonestar started it.... )


Blaming someone else as usual?


----------



## Susan in VA

Now, now, kids.  

Do you suppose if I hang out on KB all evening I can still get some work done in between posts, or am I kidding myself?


----------



## telracs

Susan in VA said:


> Now, now, kids.
> 
> Do you suppose if I hang out on KB all evening I can still get some work done in between posts, or am I kidding myself?


Why couldn't you?


----------



## Susan in VA

Do you have that much confidence in my multitasking abilities?


----------



## telracs

Susan in VA said:


> Do you have that much confidence in my multitasking abilities?


Why wouldn't I?


----------



## Oboe Joe

Why do we park in a driveway and drive in a parkway?  

(G.C. we miss you!)


----------



## Vegas_Asian

Fresh brownies anyone?


----------



## telracs

Vegas_Asian said:


> Fresh brownies anyone?


With ice cream on top?


----------



## Vegas_Asian

How &#039;bout sliced almonds and a chocolate drizzle? All I got is green tea ic


----------



## telracs

Vegas_Asian said:


> How &#039;bout sliced almonds and a chocolate drizzle? All I got is green tea ic


How about Ben and Jerry's Mudpie ice cream?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

And a cherry?


----------



## Michael Crane

What's this about brownies?


----------



## Susan in VA

michael_crane said:


> What's this about brownies?


<perks up> Really? For breakfast?


----------



## Michael Crane

Susan in VA said:


> <perks up> Really? For breakfast?


Why not?


----------



## telracs

Susan in VA said:


> <perks up> Really? For breakfast?


Don't you know the old saying?


----------



## telracs

Cobbie said:


> What old saying?


Eat dessert first, life is uncertain?


----------



## Tip10

Why not adopt a new motto?

"If it can't be served for dessert I ain't eating it!"


Oh, and Susan -- what's the difference in the ingredients between Brownies and Eggs and Toast and a mug of hot cocoa?


----------



## Michael Crane

scarlet said:


> Eat dessert first, life is uncertain?


Can that be a law?


----------



## telracs

Cobbie said:


> Why _can't_ it be a law?


Isn't it a law?


----------



## Michael Crane

If it isn't, can we fire somebody?


----------



## Michael Crane

Cobbie said:


> Isn't that easier said than done?


We can't call shenanigans on them?


----------



## Michael Crane

Isn't it worth a shot?


----------



## Margaret

A shot of what?


----------



## Annalog

Tip10 said:


> ...
> Oh, and Susan -- what's the difference in the ingredients between Brownies and Eggs and Toast and a mug of hot cocoa?


Is it the proportions?


----------



## telracs

Cobbie said:


> Are we back to the booze thing again?


were we ever off the booze?


----------



## telracs

Cobbie said:


> Is dessert booze?


Why not? Or a better question, is booze dessert?


----------



## Michael Crane

Brownies and booze?


----------



## Margaret

Why not?


----------



## telracs

Brownies and Bailey's anyone?


----------



## Margaret

Doesn't that sound yummy?


----------



## Vegas_Asian

Is there such thing as too much alcohol or chocolate?


----------



## lonestar

Vegas_Asian said:


> Is there such thing as too much alcohol or chocolate?


What do you think?


----------



## Michael Crane

But what if we run out of booze and brownies?


----------



## telracs

michael_crane said:


> But what if we run out of booze and brownies?


How could we?


----------



## Susan in VA

scarlet said:


> How could we?


How could we _not_, with all of us snarfing brownies??



Tip10 said:


> Oh, and Susan -- what's the difference in the ingredients between Brownies and Eggs and Toast and a mug of hot cocoa?


Hmmmm.... good point... but then again, I wouldn't have hot cocoa for breakfast either.


----------



## telracs

Why are you up so late?


----------



## Susan in VA

Can't a girl go out and have fun on a Friday night?

(...with DD, at a free outdoor concert, so we got home late)


----------



## telracs

Susan in VA said:


> How could we _not_, with all of us snarfing brownies??


Didn't you know virtual brownies NEVER run out?


----------



## Susan in VA

scarlet said:


> Didn't you know virtual brownies NEVER run out?


Hmmmm. Do you suppose there are virtual bank accounts too?


----------



## Vegas_Asian

Why is it when I turn around all my hard lemonade seems to have disappeared?


----------



## Michael Crane

Did you report it to the police?


----------



## lonestar

Is CSI involved yet?


----------



## Susan in VA

But is lemonade theft illegal in Vegas?


----------



## lonestar

who knows the answer to this question?


----------



## telracs

Isn't theft illegal everywhere?


----------



## lonestar

It is, isn't it?


----------



## R. M. Reed

If life doesn't give you lemons, do you steal some lemonade?


----------



## telracs

R. Reed said:


> If life doesn't give you lemons, do you steal some lemonade?


No, but maybe you'd need some sugar?


----------



## Michael Crane

Now we have to steal sugar, too?


----------



## Susan in VA

Don't people do that all the time, those little packets from restaurants?


----------



## Michael Crane

Susan in VA said:


> Don't people do that all the time, those little packets from restaurants?


You mean they didn't put them out there just for me?


----------



## Margaret

Is that why only the pink ones and the blue ones are left?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

Could you please pass the jelly?


----------



## Susan in VA

Isn't this a family forum?


----------



## telracs

Susan in VA said:


> Isn't this a family forum?


What made you think it isn't?


----------



## Annalog

mom133d said:


> Could you please pass the jelly?


Would you like the peanut butter as well?


----------



## Alle Meine Entchen

[/quote]


scarlet said:


> What made you think it isn't?





Susan in VA said:


> Isn't this a family forum?


Why do some peoples minds jump to the gutter faster than others? (mine included)


----------



## telracs

Don't all of us spend time in the gutter?  But the dreamers turn to look at the cars?


----------



## Brenda Carroll

On roadkill:

"Hey! Was that a squirrel or a rabbit?"


----------



## Susan in VA

Was it the lemonade thief, speeding away from the cops?


----------



## Tip10

Was he all hopped up on sugar?


----------



## Susan in VA

Does that blue and pink stuff give you a sugar high?


----------



## lonestar

When did we lose control?


----------



## telracs

lonestar said:


> When did we lose control?


When were we IN control?


----------



## TWErvin2

When did 'being in control' become an issue?


----------



## Annalog

Was Maxwell Smart really in CONTROL or was it Agent 99?


----------



## telracs

What was the name of the robot on get smart?


----------



## Tip10

Wasn't it Hymie?


----------



## lonestar

Was Hymie in Control?


----------



## Tip10

Who controlled Hymie in control?


----------



## lonestar

Where IS Hymie?


----------



## telracs

lonestar said:


> Where IS Hymie?


With Waldo?


----------



## lonestar

AND where is Waldo?


----------



## Annalog

Wasn't Waldo seen in a banned book?


----------



## Tip10

If the book was banned how would anybody see Waldo in it?


----------



## Annalog

I wonder why some people in some places in 1987 thought a tiny drawing of a topless female sunbather needed to be banned? Was it actually the drawing of the young boy pouring water on her back to make her jump up that they wanted to ban as it might give kids ideas for mischievious activities?


----------



## Margaret

Was that why it was banned?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

Was it because banned books sell better?


----------



## Tip10

Or do booked bands do better?


----------



## Annalog

Why am I compulsive?



Margaret said:


> Was that why it was banned?


http://www.babble.com/CS/blogs/strollerderby/archive/2008/10/03/banned-books-week-where-s-waldo.aspx



Tip10 said:


> Or do booked bands do better?


Where can you hear unbooked bands play?


----------



## telracs

Can you hear the people sing?


----------



## Margaret

Is it the song of angry men?


----------



## Michael Crane

Margaret said:


> Is it the song of angry men?


Are they angry because their books were banned?


----------



## telracs

michael_crane said:


> Are they angry because their books were banned?


Weren't they trying to start a revolution?


----------



## Tip10

Isn't a revolution just turning around in a circle and ending up where you were?


----------



## telracs

Tip10 said:


> Isn't a revolution just turning around in a circle and ending up where you were?


Oh, you've seen that version of Les Miz?


----------



## Tip10

Is there such a thing as a bad version of Les Miz?


----------



## Margaret

Who are we to judge?


----------



## telracs

If not us, who?


----------



## caracara

Who will guard the guards?


----------



## lonestar

Isn't anyone going to volunteer?


----------



## Susan in VA

Can't they guard each other?


----------



## lonestar

Why not?


----------



## Michael Crane

Do we have to pay extra for that?


----------



## Margaret

Are they union?


----------



## Tip10

As opposed to confederate?


----------



## telracs

Why was the train going downtown on the uptown track?


----------



## telracs

Cobbie said:


> Since you can go only one way at a time why can't you go downtown on the uptown track?


why wasn't it going downtown on the DOWNTOWN track?


----------



## Annalog

scarlet said:


> why wasn't it going downtown on the DOWNTOWN track?


Were they making repairs to the downtown track? Were the signal lights set correctly? Were any trains trying to go uptown on the uptown track?


----------



## Margaret

Why are you asking so many questions?


----------



## Michael Crane

Margaret said:


> Why are you asking so many questions?


Wasn't that the point of this thread?


----------



## telracs

Is there such a thing as too many questions?


----------



## Annalog

Was it the National Enquirer that used the slogan "Inquiring minds want to know"?


----------



## Michael Crane

Annalog said:


> Was it the National Enquirer that used the slogan "Inquiring minds want to know"?


Weren't they the ones who said Evlis was a space alien?


----------



## Tip10

Who is Evlis?


----------



## Annalog

Isn't Evlis the space alien Elvis impersonator?


----------



## Michael Crane

Evlis is maybe Elvis' evil twin brother??  Didn't the Enquirer say that once?


----------



## Annalog

What about Jesse Garon Presley, his stillborn twin?


----------



## Tip10

Does he like bananas?


----------



## lonestar

Were the bananas on sale?


----------



## Margaret

Do we have a coupon?


----------



## Susan in VA

Don't we always leave them in the _other_ purse?


----------



## Susan in VA

I've had mine together with the grocery list in my _hand_ at the checkout, and forgotten to scan them. 

Why can't there be One Perfect Purse that is always the perfect size and goes with everything?


----------



## lonestar

Did you remember the bananas?


----------



## Margaret

Can you fit them in your purse?


----------



## telracs

Bananas?  I thought I told you to get bagels?


----------



## R. M. Reed

Why can't a purse be a magical "bag of holding" which is infinitely big inside?


----------



## telracs

R. Reed said:


> Why can't a purse be a magical "bag of holding" which is infinitely big inside?


Who are you, Mary Poppins?


----------



## telracs

Cobbie said:


> You win.
> 
> Do I need want a new purse?


Will you buy one big enough to hold your camera?


----------



## Susan in VA

LOL!  Are you ever going to give poor Cobbie a rest??


----------



## telracs

Cobbie said:


> Do I have a bag big enough scheduled to arrive on Monday?
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Better question - Will I then carry it?


What purse did you buy?

What will I do if you don't carry it?


----------



## Margaret

How great will an orange bag look for fall?
How many oranges can you carry in it?


----------



## Susan in VA

Maybe the camera will bruise the oranges instead?


----------



## Susan in VA

Great excuse, kid.  

Scarlet, is she excused from carrying a camera now?


----------



## telracs

Susan in VA said:


> Great excuse, kid.
> 
> Scarlet, is she excused from carrying a camera now?





Cobbie said:


> Yeah, yeah, Scarlet, am I, huh, huh?


Did you think there was a chance in a very hot realm of me excusing her?


----------



## Margaret

Of which hot realm do you speak?


----------



## intinst

Would that be Texas or Arkansas?


----------



## lonestar

What's this about Texas?


----------



## lonestar

When is Autumn?


----------



## Susan in VA

Isn't that the one right after summer?


----------



## P.A. Woodburn

I don't carry purses in my hand anymore. I always use the kind that sling over your shoulders like a back pack. Sometimes they are hard to find. Not back packs but back pack purses. I think they are much better for your body. The regular kind can pull your shoulders on one side or another, and they can cause injury. 

It's also nice to have both hands free. I don't know how men get along without purses because I have so much stuff that I carry around all of the time.

Ann


----------



## Michael Crane

Where'd you get the coconuts?


Spoiler



Sorry, just watched MONTY PYTHON AND THE HOLY GRAIL yesterday


----------



## telracs

P.A. Woodburn said:


> I don't carry purses in my hand anymore. I always use the kind that sling over your shoulders like a back pack. Sometimes they are hard to find. Not back packs but back pack purses. I think they are much better for your body. The regular kind can pull your shoulders on one side or another, and they can cause injury.
> 
> It's also nice to have both hands free. I don't know how men get along without purses because I have so much stuff that I carry around all of the time.
> 
> Ann


Ann, did you post this in the right thread?



Michael Crane said:


> Where'd you get the coconuts?
> 
> 
> Spoiler
> 
> 
> 
> Sorry, just watched MONTY PYTHON AND THE HOLY GRAIL yesterday


African swallow?


----------



## Steven L. Hawk

Why is that "he who smelled it" is assumed to be the "one who dealt it"?


----------



## telracs

Cobbie said:


> Probably not but....she's posting, she's posting so do we care?


Am I being picky if I want the poster to conform with the title of the thread? And at least ask some kind of question?


----------



## Steven L. Hawk

I wonder it there's a thread somewhere that provides answers to truly random questions?


----------



## telracs

Steven L. Hawk said:


> I wonder it there's a thread somewhere that provides answers to truly random questions?


Why don't you start one?


Spoiler



but be warned, it'll get weird, fast.


----------



## Victorine

Which came first, the chicken or the egg?

Vicki


----------



## Margaret

Victorine said:


> Which came first, the chicken or the egg?
> 
> Vicki


Has anyone ever answered that?


----------



## telracs

Victorine said:


> Which came first, the chicken or the egg?
> 
> Vicki


Doesn't it depend on which way you walk through the supermarket?


----------



## Steven L. Hawk

Isn't it obvious that eggs come first?  Who ever heard of chicken for breakfast?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

Margaret said:


> Has anyone ever answered that?


Actually, British scientists claim to have proven that the chicken came first.http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/38238685/ns/technology_and_science-science/

Now that that is solved, will they ever discover why the chicken crossed the road?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

Do you just post random questions here?


----------



## RichardDR

What exit?


----------



## Steven L. Hawk

Where are my pants?


----------



## telracs

RichardDR said:


> What exit?


What road?


----------



## Dawn McCullough White

Why do villains monologue?


----------



## lonestar

How random are these questions?


----------



## telracs

How random is anything?


----------



## lonestar

Anything isn't random?


----------



## telracs

lonestar said:


> Anything isn't random?


Everything isn't random?


----------



## lonestar

Is random random?


----------



## telracs

Why wouldn't it be?


----------



## telracs

I don't know, are they?


----------



## lonestar

Are you dizzy or am I?


----------



## Susan in VA

I certainly am.

Isn't it nice how many new people are asking random questions?


----------



## Jeff

Or are they just random people?


----------



## lonestar

Do YOU think we are random?


----------



## Tip10

If we're not all alike we must be random, right?


----------



## Michael Crane

I have my iPod on random... does that count?


----------



## Margaret

Does an iPod count in decimal or in binary?


----------



## lonestar

What?!!!?


----------



## cegrundler

If you plan to fail and succeed, which did you do?


----------



## Tip10

Um, would that be successfully failed or failed successfully?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

How many beers in a six-pack?


----------



## Michael Crane

Valmore Daniels said:


> How many beers in a six-pack?


Aren't there six, unless some kid stole a can/bottle?


----------



## telracs

Why can't people get along.


----------



## Michael Crane

Are people fighting?


----------



## Tip10

scarlet said:


> Why can't people get along.


Shouldn't this be in the form of a question?


----------



## telracs

Tip10 said:


> Shouldn't this be in the form of a question?


Ooops, did I use a period instead of a question mark?

That show you what kind of day I'm having?


----------



## Michael Crane

Is it not a good day?


----------



## Barbiedull

Should I read all the random questions to find out if my random question has been randomly questioned?


----------



## lonestar

barbiedull said:


> Should I read all the random questions to find out if my random question has been randomly questioned?


Should we all read all the random questions to find out if our random questions have been randomly asked?


----------



## Barbiedull

Is imitation REALLY the sincerest form of flattery?


----------



## Susan in VA

barbiedull said:


> Should I read all the random questions to find out if my random question has been randomly questioned?


Are there really any original questions?


----------



## Barbiedull

Does the gene pool have a shallow end?


----------



## Susan in VA

Aren't both ends shallow, with the deep part in the middle?


----------



## Dawn McCullough White

So, if you drink Dr. Pepper you become a pepper?  How does that work exactly?  What sort of transmogrification does one have to go through for that to occur?


----------



## lonestar

Is that like shock therapy?


----------



## telracs

Cobbie said:


> What would I do without Google?


Looking up transmogrification?


----------



## telracs

Cobbie said:


> How do I use transmogrify in a sentence?
> 
> (_That's_ what I'm looking up. )


The way you just did?


----------



## Jeff

Are you transmogrifying into Susan?


----------



## telracs

Jeff said:


> Are you transmogrifying into Susan?


Not me?


----------



## Jeff

Are either of those proper questions?

Don't we have rules about that?


----------



## Michael Crane

Who's ready for the weekend?


----------



## Jeff

Is someone trying to change the subject here?


----------



## telracs

Rules? We have *rules* here?


----------



## Jeff

scarlet said:


> Rules? We have *rules* here?


Don't we?


----------



## telracs

Are alternate side of the street parking rules in effect?


----------



## Jeff

Have we scared Michael Crane away? Isn't he one of those from "the other side"?


----------



## Jeff

Ann in Arlington said:


> Whatcha doin' in Boston? Who'd want to go there?


----------



## telracs

Is posting other people's questions allowed by the rules?


----------



## Ann in Arlington

Why wouldn't it be? What _are_ the rules? And didn't he get permission first?


----------



## Jeff

How do you form a belly-laugh as a question?


----------



## Barbiedull

Is it ok to answer a question with a question?


----------



## telracs

barbiedull said:


> Is it ok to answer a question with a question?


Is there any other way?


----------



## crebel

Who knew you could post a quote from another thread?  Should I know how to do that?  Are multiple questions against the rules?  Does really wanting to know make it not random?


----------



## Tip10

Would it really be random if we had rules? 
Do we have random rules?  
Or do we randomly have rules?


----------



## Dawn McCullough White

Doesn't anyone read Calvin and Hobbes anymore?


----------



## Jeff

Who are Calvin and Hobbes?


----------



## lonestar

Which is better?  Butter or Margarine?


----------



## Jeff

Better for what?


----------



## Annalog

crebel said:


> Who knew you could post a quote from another thread? Should I know how to do that? Are multiple questions against the rules? Does really wanting to know make it not random?


Is there a way other than going to the source thread, pressing the quote button, copying the result, going to the destination thread, and pasting the result in the reply box? Does it work because the initial quote tag contains the topic number and message number? Have I done this before? Why didn't I do it this time? Does the date value begin at the beginning of 1970? Can that value be changed? Why do I try stuff like this?


----------



## Annalog

Annalog said:


> Were tree ferns a favorite food of the Apatosaurus?


Am I compulsive?


----------



## telracs

Have you seen my new poll?


----------



## Susan in VA

Where the heck did the tree ferns and the apatosaurus come from?


----------



## Tip10

Susan in VA said:


> Where the heck did the tree ferns and the apatosaurus come from?


Why the land of elves and dwarfs, of course. Where else?


----------



## Susan in VA

Elves and dwarfs lived in the Jurassic period?  Then why didn't Crichton include them?


----------



## Tip10

Susan in VA said:


> Elves and dwarfs lived in the Jurassic period? Then why didn't Crichton include them?


Because he strained his andromeda?


----------



## Susan in VA

Do they sell strained andromeda in the baby food aisle?


----------



## Victorine

Annalog said:


> Is there a way other than going to the source thread, pressing the quote button, copying the result, going to the destination thread, and pasting the result in the reply box? Does it work because the initial quote tag contains the topic number and message number? Have I done this before? Why didn't I do it this time? Does the date value begin at the beginning of 1970? Can that value be changed? Why do I try stuff like this?


Why do I think it's cool that Annalog figured out how to mess with the quote date??


----------



## NogDog

Why do they call it "fasting" when it seems to take forever?


----------



## Dawn McCullough White

Why am I still awake?


----------



## Annalog

Susan in VA said:


> Where the heck did the tree ferns and the apatosaurus come from?


Was the question too random? Did you try the link at the top of the quote?



Susan in VA said:


> Do they sell strained andromeda in the baby food aisle?


What does strained andromeda taste like? Is it good for babies? 



Annalog said:


> Is there a way other than going to the source thread, pressing the quote button, copying the result, going to the destination thread, and pasting the result in the reply box? Does it work because the initial quote tag contains the topic number and message number? Have I done this before? Why didn't I do it this time? Does the date value begin at the beginning of 1970? Can that value be changed? Why do I try stuff like this?





Victorine said:


> Why do I think it's cool that Annalog figured out how to mess with the quote date??


Is it because it seems as if a time machine was involved? Did it take long to find the date setting Victorine used for my quote?


----------



## crebel

Aren't there some amazing folks here at Kindleboards?


----------



## lonestar

What day is it really?


----------



## Tip10

lonestar said:


> What day is it really?


Which, of course, begs the question:

Does anybody really know what time it is?


----------



## lonestar

Does anybody really care?


(Chicago)


----------



## Jeff

When are the K3s shipping?


----------



## crebel

If it is June 2216, why are you guys still waiting for your K3s?


----------



## Barbiedull

Are they shipping K3s in random order?


----------



## Jeff

Now isn't that food for thought?


----------



## Michael Crane

Is there a lottery going on for the K3's?


----------



## Jeff

Michael Crane said:


> Is there a lottery going on for the K3's?


Yes - does anyone know the URL of that thread?


----------



## Victorine

Why do I laugh out loud each time I read this thread?


----------



## Ann in Arlington

Why do I read it?


----------



## Margaret

How can you stay away?


----------



## Barbiedull

Has anyone read the whole thread?


----------



## Michael Crane

Is that even possible?


----------



## telracs

Maybe if you've been here since the beginning of the thread?


----------



## Susan in VA

Isn't changing the date on quotes falsification of evidence?


----------



## Barbiedull

Susan in VA said:


> Isn't changing the date on quotes falsification of evidence?


Are we dealing with random criminals?


----------



## Annalog

Susan in VA said:


> Isn't changing the date on quotes falsification of evidence?





barbiedull said:


> Are we dealing with random criminals?


Are the quotes in this thread being used as evidence? Evidence of what? Isn't only the original source valid as evidence? So isn't it OK if the link to the original source is still valid? Am I a random criminal?  Should I run and hide?


----------



## Margaret

Annalog said:


> Are the quotes in this thread being used as evidence? Evidence of what? Isn't only the original source valid as evidence? So isn't it OK if the link to the original source is still valid? Am I a random criminal?  Should I run and hide?


Are you just a wee bit paranoid?


----------



## Annalog

Margaret said:


> Are you just a wee bit paranoid?


Isn't a little paranoia healthy?


----------



## Ann in Arlington

Are you paranoid if they really _are_ out to get you?


----------



## Debra Purdy Kong

As writers, are we ever really finished?


----------



## telracs

If we finish, will the world end?


----------



## Margaret

Would you want to be finished?


----------



## lonestar

Who is they?


----------



## telracs

Cobbie said:


> Are they it?


Aren't you it?


----------



## lonestar

Did you notice I changed it?


----------



## Margaret

Aren't we them?


----------



## telracs

Margaret said:


> Aren't we them?


Aren't they us?


----------



## Jeff

Are you all nuts?


----------



## Barbiedull

Does everyone think we're nuts, or are we just paranoid?


----------



## telracs

how do my headphones get all tangled up when all they've been doing all day is sit on my desk?

or have they been doing something I don't know about?


----------



## lonestar

Why am I so sleepy?


----------



## Susan in VA

Jeff said:


> Are you all nuts?


Certainly sounds that way, doesn't it?


----------



## crebel

Susan in VA said:


> Certainly sounds that way, doesn't it?


I resemble that remark this evening, don't I?


----------



## Victorine

scarlet said:


> how do my headphones get all tangled up when all they've been doing all day is sit on my desk?
> 
> or have they been doing something I don't know about?


Ha? Ha? Ha? Do I have to laugh in question form here?


----------



## telracs

Victorine said:


> Ha? Ha? Ha? Do I have to laugh in question form here?


Why? Do you know what they've been up to?


----------



## Victorine

scarlet said:


> Why? Do you know what they've been up to?


Do you think they turn on your music and dance while your back is turned?


----------



## telracs

Victorine said:


> Do you think they turn on your music and dance while your back is turned?


Is that what they do? How do you know? You been spying on my headphones?


----------



## Barbiedull

Where are all the random questioners today?


----------



## Jeff

Didn't you get the memo?


----------



## Barbiedull

What's in the memo?


----------



## Jeff

What memo?


----------



## Barbiedull

Was it a random memo?


----------



## Jeff

Was that a random answer?


----------



## Barbiedull

Does anyone have the answer?


----------



## intinst

Who will answer?


----------



## Jeff

So long as someone answers, will anybody care?


----------



## intinst

Will it be the "right" answer?


----------



## Barbiedull

Will we know if it's wrong?


----------



## Jeff

Why am I sitting here, all alone, and laughing like an idiot?


----------



## Susan in VA

Do you really want anyone to answer that?


----------



## Jeff

Can I retract a question?


----------



## Barbiedull

Are we ever....REALLY alone?


----------



## telracs

Jeff said:


> Can I retract a question?


Why would you want to?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

Do all 4 year olds spend the weekend whining after being pleasant all week or just mine?


----------



## Susan in VA

mom133d said:


> Do all 4 year olds spend the weekend whining after being pleasant all week or just mine?


How mean would it be if I told you that it's going to go on like that for a few more years?


----------



## Margaret

Don't most of them whine all week as well?


----------



## Tip10

Isn't children's whine why most mothers wine?


----------



## telracs

Is it pathetic that I'm flying across the Atlantic Ocean to see a concert?


----------



## Margaret

Does it depend on whom you are going to see?


----------



## telracs

Ever heard of John Barrowman?


----------



## Susan in VA

Who's he?  And where are you going to see him?


----------



## lonestar

Was he The Millionaire?


----------



## telracs

lonestar said:


> Was he The Millionaire?


No.

Ever watched Torchwood?


----------



## Brenda Carroll

Is it terrible that Miss Scarlet didn't invite any of us to go with her?


----------



## Barbiedull

Are we all invited to go?


----------



## Margaret

Who is buying our tickets?


----------



## Barbiedull

Isn't Scarlet paying?


----------



## telracs

Do I look like I'm made of money?


----------



## Margaret

Can you sell your fancy red dress?


----------



## Barbiedull

Scarlet, are you made of money?
You look very rich in your avatar!


----------



## Brenda Carroll

Money is green.
Miss Scarlet is Green.
Therefore, doesn't that mean that Miss Scarlet is made of money?


----------



## lonestar

Can you make my ticket to see George Strait?


----------



## Barbiedull

Lonestar, do all your ex's live in Texas?
(I like George Strait too.)


----------



## telracs

Did you know that it's not easy being green?


----------



## Brenda Carroll

Didn't Kermit and the Geico Gekko both say that?


----------



## telracs

Doesn't truth bear repeating?


----------



## Brenda Carroll

Who is this 'Truth Bear'? Teddy Ruxpin?


----------



## Brenda Carroll

Did Intinst just post a photo of Miss Scarlet's car on the Infinity Thread?


----------



## Dawn McCullough White

But why?


----------



## Barbiedull

Why ask why?


----------



## Jeff

What's a New Yorker doing with a car?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

scarlet said:


> Ever heard of John Barrowman?


Will I fit in your luggage?


----------



## lonestar

barbiedull said:


> Lonestar, do all your ex's live in Texas?
> (I like George Strait too.)


Exes? Where else?


----------



## Barbiedull

mom133d said:


> Will I fit in your luggage?


Who can afford to check luggage?

(Miss Scarlet isn't made of money, or haven't you heard?)


----------



## OliviaD

Do we need to bring a sack lunch?


----------



## Barbiedull

OliviaD said:


> Do we need to bring a sack lunch?


When in doubt, should we do without?


----------



## Dawn McCullough White

Is my foot broken?


----------



## Brenda Carroll

lonestar said:


> Exes? Where else?


Do your exes drink Dos Equis?


----------



## Dawn McCullough White

Cobbie said:


> Do you think your foot is broken?


How would I know?


----------



## Jeff

Does it hurt?


----------



## Barbiedull

If you break it, will we know?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

They say two wrongs don't make a right, but what if you made three lefts? Would that be right?


----------



## lonestar

Brendan Carroll said:


> Do your exes drink Dos Equis?


Hey, they're exes remember? Who cares?


----------



## lonestar

Why do I get 18 emails when someone posts a reply?


----------



## Dawn McCullough White

Why is my son wake awake at 4am?


----------



## intinst

Why does everything happen to me?


----------



## Brenda Carroll

lonestar said:


> Hey, they're exes remember? Who cares?


What if they were minding their P's and Q's?


----------



## Barbiedull

Could it be? What's done is really done?


----------



## lonestar

Brendan Carroll said:


> What if they were minding their P's and Q's?


Do you think any of those rascals know what P's and Q's are?


----------



## Jeff

I know what a P is; what's a Q?


----------



## Ann in Arlington

P's are pints and Q's are quarts, aren't they?


----------



## Barbiedull

Pennies and quarters?


----------



## Jeff

The correct answer is pints and quarts - do you know why?


----------



## Ann in Arlington

Yes I do.  Do you?


----------



## Jeff

Could it be the barkeep in English pubs tracking customer consumption?


----------



## Ann in Arlington

Or could it be said barkeep reminding the customers that he's keeping track and they'd better be able to pay up at 'last call'?

Or both?


----------



## Dawn McCullough White

Isn't Google wonderful?


----------



## Ann in Arlington

Are you implying Jeff and I didn't know already and had to look it up?


----------



## Barbiedull

Google is my friend, is it your friend too?


----------



## telracs

Isn't Q John De Lancie (or Corbin Bernsen)?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

When is a flower not a flower?


----------



## Dawn McCullough White

Ann in Arlington said:


> Are you implying Jeff and I didn't know already and had to look it up?


Would that be wrong of me?


----------



## terryr

Brendan Carroll said:


> Money is green.
> Miss Scarlet is Green.
> Therefore, doesn't that mean that Miss Scarlet is made of money?


"How do you know she is a witch?"
"Because...she's made of wood?"


----------



## Jeff

Dawn McCullough White said:


> Would that be wrong of me?


That depends - do two wrongs make you right? Did somebody already say that or is there an echo in here?


----------



## Barbiedull

Isn't it 4 lefts make a right?

Can you do all the wrongs you want if you do enough lefts to make them right?


----------



## telracs

T.M. Roy said:


> "How do you know she is a witch?"
> "Because...she's made of wood?"


huh?


----------



## Ann in Arlington

Scarlet, don't you know Monty Python?


----------



## telracs

Ann in Arlington said:


> Scarlet, don't you know Monty Python?


um, some of it?


----------



## Ann in Arlington

Holy Grail?  How do you tell if she's a witch?


----------



## Betsy the Quilter

What if I ask a question that's been asked before?


----------



## telracs

Ann in Arlington said:


> Holy Grail? How do you tell if she's a witch?


didn't you know that they cut that part from the Broadway show?



Betsy the Quilter said:


> What if I ask a question that's been asked before?


Then maybe somebody will answer it again?


----------



## Ann in Arlington

Spamalot?  Did you know it also has other Python bits that weren't in Holy Grail?


----------



## Tip10

barbiedull said:


> Isn't it 4 lefts make a right?


THREE lefts make a right, four lefts make a circle, do you get lost a lot?


----------



## telracs

Tip10 said:


> THREE lefts make a right, four lefts make a circle, do you get lost a lot?


Don't four lefts make a square (or rectangle)?


----------



## lonestar

Did I unplug the iron?


----------



## Tip10

What's an iron?


----------



## Barbiedull

Tip10 said:


> THREE lefts make a right, four lefts make a circle, do you get lost a lot?


I DO get lost a lot! Maybe I need a gps?


----------



## Susan in VA

scarlet said:


> didn't you know that they cut that part from the Broadway show?


Maybe it was because they couldn't figure out how to have a dunking well on the stage?


----------



## telracs

will i lose my monty python fan club card if i admit i haven't seen any MP movies?


----------



## lonestar

Are you sure you want to admit that?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

Why can't I remember the things I always forget?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

Why do I forget the things I can't remember?


----------



## Dawn McCullough White

Why don't we have any beer?


----------



## Susan in VA

Did you forget to put it on the shopping list?


----------



## Dawn McCullough White

How did I, just know, that someone cool would respond?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

Like me?


----------



## Susan in VA

Is that really the first time in my life someone referred to me as cool?


----------



## Jeff

Doesn't everyone think Susan is cool?


----------



## Dawn McCullough White

Why wouldn't everyone think Susan is cool?


----------



## Tip10

Does Susan really want to be cool or does she want to be really hot?


----------



## caracara

Do all the Texans think hot is over rated, and she wants to be cool?


----------



## intinst

Why can't Susan be Hot and Cool?


----------



## Annalog

Were any of the contestants in the Miss Universe Pageant not born on Earth?


----------



## lonestar

Weren't a few of them from Remulac? (sp)


----------



## Tip10

Were any of them made from all natural materials?


----------



## lonestar

If so, where did the natural materials come from?


----------



## telracs

Can a henchperson serve more than one evil overlord?


----------



## Ann in Arlington

A house divided against itself can not stand, can it?

One can not serve two masters, can one?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

What happens if someone scares you half to death ... _twice?_


----------



## Dawn McCullough White

What does my head keep reading "kittensinautumn" as kittensauce?


----------



## Ann in Arlington

What?


----------



## Dawn McCullough White

What is kittensauce anyhow?


----------



## lonestar

Do we really want to know?


----------



## Susan in VA

Tip10 said:


> Were any of them made from all natural materials?


  



scarlet said:


> Can a henchperson serve more than one evil overlord?


Could said henchperson work a day shift for one and a night shift for the other?


----------



## telracs

Susan in VA said:


> Could said henchperson work a day shift for one and a night shift for the other?


But then when would the henchperson sleep?


----------



## Susan in VA

On the job, of course.  Isn't that what the henchpersons in Bond movies do?


----------



## telracs

Susan in VA said:


> On the job, of course. Isn't that what the henchpersons in Bond movies do?


What if I prefer to SLEEP, not "sleep"?


----------



## Susan in VA

scarlet said:


> What if I prefer to SLEEP, not "sleep"?


You mean you can't sleep standing up? Don't all New Yorkers need that skill for the subway?


----------



## Ann in Arlington

Why?


----------



## Tip10

Susan in VA said:


> You mean you can't sleep standing up? Don't all New Yorkers need that skill for the subway?


Isn't that sleeping around and don't you get a bad rep for that if your female?


----------



## Tip10

Cobbie said:


> Is that the good ole' double standard, again?


Double Standard -- where? Both sexes get a reputation don't they? 

{I shall now run from the room and HIDE!}


----------



## lonestar

Did you see all the Kindle commercials today?


----------



## Susan in VA

Is this thread slow today because everyone is off in other threads obsessing about the K3?


----------



## Jeff

Is it here yet?


----------



## Ann in Arlington

No.

But is it "out for delivery?"


Spoiler



YES!


----------



## Dawn McCullough White

Susan in VA said:


> Is this thread slow today because everyone is off in other threads obsessing about the K3?


Has anyone received his or her K3 yet?


----------



## crebel

There is a K3?


----------



## telracs

Isn't K3 the world's third highest mountain?


----------



## Jeff

Have you seen the Daewoo K3, light machine gun?


----------



## Tip10

Naw, isn't it a Dutch All Girl band for pre-teeny boppers?


----------



## Barbiedull

K3? I thought it was a vitamin?


----------



## telracs

Where have all the  gone?


----------



## Annalog

If someone is taking coumadin, do they need to be cocerned about vitamin K3 as well as K?


----------



## Dawn McCullough White

Susan in VA said:


> Is this thread slow today because everyone is off in other threads obsessing about the K3?


Who's obsessing?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

Do you _really _ love me?


----------



## lonestar

What's not to love?


----------



## Jeff

What's love got to do with it?


----------



## lonestar

Isn't love what the world needs now?


----------



## Jeff

So you never need to say I'm sorry?


----------



## Susan in VA

Why wouldn't you say you were sorry if you hurt someone you love?


----------



## Jeff

Have you asked Al Gore?


----------



## Susan in VA

Why, does he know stuff I don't?


----------



## Jeff

What do facts have to do with it?


----------



## Susan in VA

Facts? Do we really need to confuse everyone with_ facts_?


----------



## Jeff

Did you ever have to make up your mind?


----------



## div

never let the facts get in the way of a good story.


----------



## Susan in VA

Did you ever have to finally decide?


----------



## lonestar

div said:


> never let the facts get in the way of a good story.


Is this a question in disguise?


----------



## Jeff

Say yes to one and let the other one ride ?


----------



## Susan in VA

Why can't you say yes to both?


----------



## Barbiedull

There's so many changes and tears you must hide,
did you ever have to finally decide?


----------



## lonestar

Decide on what?


----------



## Tip10

Why decide?


----------



## Jeff

What are we deciding?


----------



## Barbiedull

Jeff said:


> What are we deciding?





Jeff said:


> Say yes to one and let the other one ride ?


Did you forget?


----------



## Tip10

Aren't we deciding whether to decide or not?


----------



## lonestar

Should we decide whether to decide or not?


----------



## Jeff

Can we decide what we're deciding before we decide?


----------



## Ann in Arlington

How?


----------



## Jeff

Kowabunga?


----------



## lonestar

Dude?


----------



## Jeff

Isn't it Howdy Doody time?


----------



## Brenda Carroll

Does anyone still love Captain Kangaroo?


----------



## Jeff

Isn't Captain Kangaroo dead?


----------



## Susan in VA

I can't believe nobody has asked...

Brown bear, brown bear, what do you see?


----------



## Ann in Arlington

who?


----------



## lonestar

Mr Greenjeans?


----------



## Barbiedull

Who's on first?

Any deciders in here?


----------



## Ann in Arlington

When?


----------



## Jeff

Is it who, what, where or when? Did you ask why and how?


----------



## Ann in Arlington

Huh?


----------



## Jeff

Is groaning appropriate on this thread?


----------



## Ann in Arlington

When?


----------



## Jeff

Is repeated redundancy against the rules?


----------



## loonlover

What rules?


----------



## Jeff

Who started this, anyway?


----------



## crebel

Don't you love seeing locations with our avatars now?


----------



## telracs

I thought we didn't have any rules on this thread?


----------



## Barbiedull

Avatar? Location? What if I'm in the Witless Protection Program?
Will they know it's me?


----------



## Jeff

Anybody notice that there's nothing dull about Barbie?


----------



## Susan in VA

crebel said:


> Don't you love seeing locations with our avatars now?


Hey, when did that start??

(I saw Betsy's a few minutes ago and thought she had just now added it on purpose... didn't even notice the others yet....)


----------



## Jeff

Susan in VA said:


> Hey, when did that start??
> 
> (I saw Betsy's a few minutes ago and thought she had just now added it on purpose... didn't even notice the others yet....)


Did you miss the location thread where Harvey made the change from 30,000 feet?


----------



## Susan in VA

How could I have seen it when I've been out of the house all day?


----------



## Jeff

Susan in VA said:


> How could I have seen it when I've been out of the house all day?


How would I know you were out of the house? Do I look like a stalker?


----------



## Jeff

Cobbie said:


> Who's Harvey?
> 
> (No....now must go find. Jeff, you aren't just joshing Susan, are you?)


I might josh Susan, but would I josh you, Cobbie?


----------



## Barbiedull

Jeff said:


> Did you miss the location thread where Harvey made the change from 30,000 feet?


Harvey must have very long arms! How can he read a Kindle with arms that long?


----------



## Jeff

barbiedull said:


> Harvey must have very long arms! How can he read a Kindle with arms that long?


You didn't know that Harvey has 20-30,000 vision?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

What are the chances of _this _ happening twice ... ?


----------



## telracs

Cobbie, does this help?

http://www.kboards.com/index.php/topic,33103.0/topicseen.html

And Jeff, you know that only I'm allowed to pick on Cobbie, right?


----------



## Jeff

Did you read what I wrote? Joshing-picking-on.


----------



## Barbiedull

Jeff said:


> You didn't know that Harvey has 20-30,000 vision?


I suppose he didn't need the font hack?


----------



## lonestar

Does that mean he's a hack?


----------



## Susan in VA

lonestar said:


> Does that mean he's a hack?


Aren't they all over in... uh... that other section? <ducks and runs>


----------



## telracs

Susan in VA said:


> Aren't they all over in... uh... that other section? <ducks and runs>


How can I resurrect an author I "accidentally" killed?


----------



## Susan in VA

Would a seance do the trick?

edit: Realizing too late that this is an invitation for _someone_ to start yet another Highly Silly Thread...


----------



## telracs

Susan in VA said:


> Would a seance do the trick?
> 
> edit: Realizing too late that this is an invitation for _someone_ to start yet another Highly Silly Thread...


Isn't this already a highly silly thread?


----------



## Susan in VA

Yes, but...


Spoiler



imagine what the Davids could do with the concept of a seance thread to bring back one of 'em. Or just talk to him with a ouija board. 


 Shhhhhhh!

Do you believe in ghosts?


----------



## lonestar

Don't you see them?


----------



## Barbiedull

I love highly silly threads, where can I sign up?


----------



## lonestar

Do we know who is in charge of silly questions?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

Are you volunteering?


----------



## telracs

Want a cookie?



Spoiler



the one's deb martin made are great!


----------



## lonestar

mom133d said:


> Are you volunteering?


Shouldn't someone?


----------



## telracs

lonestar said:


> Shouldn't someone?


Why?


----------



## Jeff

We must have a volunteer because how could we have an election if every vote ended with a question mark?


----------



## telracs

Why would we want someone in charge?


----------



## Barbiedull

Do we have to have an election?


----------



## Susan in VA

scarlet said:


> Why would we want someone in charge?


Because total anarchy would be... like those_ other_ forums?


----------



## telracs

Susan in VA said:


> Because total anarchy would be... like those_ other_ forums?


What's wrong with the level of controlled anarchy we have now?


----------



## Susan in VA

Doesn't controlled anarchy mean _someone_'s in charge, however laissez-harvey they are?


----------



## lonestar

So we don't need a volunteer after all?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

Why do birds suddenly appear every time you are near?


----------



## telracs

Valmore Daniels said:


> Why do birds suddenly appear every time you are near?


They want the birdseed in my pocket?


----------



## Barbiedull

Scarlet, why do you have birdseed in your pocket?
Are you reading "Hansel and Gretel?"


----------



## telracs

barbiedull said:


> Scarlet, why do you have birdseed in your pocket?
> Are you reading "Hansel and Gretel?"


After some of the doings here, you ask *why* I do something?


----------



## Barbiedull

Sorry Scarlet...would you like another cookie?
I made them with birdseed just for you!


----------



## vwkitten

Can I have a cookie that doesn't go straight to my hips?


----------



## Jeff

Birdseed cookies?


----------



## Barbiedull

vwkitten said:


> Can I have a cookie that doesn't go straight to my hips?


Kindleboard cookies are calorie free, aren't they?
(No bird seed in the next batch...those were for Scarlet.)


----------



## Barbiedull

Jeff said:


> Birdseed cookies?


I assumed Scarlet liked birdseed because she has it in her pocket?
Maybe it was to throw at me...?


----------



## Jeff

Haven't you learned not to trust Scarlet?


----------



## telracs

barbiedull said:


> I assumed Scarlet liked birdseed because she has it in her pocket?
> Maybe it was to throw at me...?





barbiedull said:


> Kindleboard cookies are calorie free, aren't they?
> (No bird seed in the next batch...those were for Scarlet.)


How do I answer these in the form of a question?

I know, anarchist strikes and speaks in declamatory statements. The birdseed was for the carpenters and their birds, not to throw at anyone. And no thanks, I'll pass on the birdseed cookies.

And yes, kindleboard cookies are calorie free.



Jeff said:


> Haven't you learned not to trust Scarlet?


Jeff, haven't you learned not to annoy me?


----------



## Jeff

Are you annoyed by truth?


----------



## telracs

Jeff said:


> Are you annoyed by truth?


Why wouldn't you trust me?


----------



## Barbiedull

Jeff said:


> Haven't you learned not to trust Scarlet?


Who should I trust?

Jeff, is that a white hat you're wearing?
Are you one of the good guys here?
(Don't tell anyone, but I heard Scarlet killed off 2 writers....to add new "dead author" screensavers to her kindle!)


----------



## telracs

barbiedull said:


> Who should I trust?
> 
> Jeff, is that a white hat you're wearing?
> Are you one of the good guys here?
> (Don't tell anyone, but I heard Scarlet killed off 2 writers....to add new "dead author" screensavers to her kindle!)


Would you like the actual story of scarlet killing Davids?


----------



## Jeff

What was the question?


----------



## Barbiedull

scarlet said:


> Would you like the actual story of scarlet killing Davids?


I think I read most of the thread. I'm amazed you can keep up
with so many threads here! 
How do you ever find time to read anything else?


----------



## telracs

barbiedull said:


> I think I read most of the thread. I'm amazed you can keep up
> with so many threads here!
> How do you ever find time to read anything else?


There's other stuff to read?


----------



## Barbiedull

scarlet said:


> There's other stuff to read?


If you don't kill all the authors, maybe they'll write more books?


----------



## crebel

It's more like a Wiley Coyote dead isn't it?  Don't you expect the Davids to pop right back up?


----------



## Susan in VA

Oh no, pop-up Davids.  

Scarlet, you've managed to get yourself quite a reputation, haven't you?


----------



## Barbiedull

If they did pop back up...would Scarlet kill them again?


----------



## Tip10

Who is Josh and what happened to him?


----------



## telracs

how far is too far?


----------



## Barbiedull

scarlet said:


> how far is too far?


When enough is enough?


----------



## Tip10

How close is too close?


----------



## tsilver

Is a burp more disgusting than a belch?  

Terry


----------



## crebel

barbiedull said:


> When enough is enough?


Is enough ever enough?


----------



## Tip10

When does random become non-random?


----------



## Geoffrey

Is this game still going on?


----------



## intinst

What do you think?


----------



## Barbiedull

Is thinking required? Someone shoulda told me...


----------



## lonestar

Why would we want to think?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

What Is greater than God, more evil than the devil, all poor people have it, wealthy people need it, and if you eat it-, you will die?


----------



## Jeff

Nothing?


----------



## caracara

Is "nothing" a question, or an answer?


----------



## Jeff

caracara said:


> Is "nothing" a question, or an answer?


Isn't "nothing" the correct answer to the previous question?


----------



## intinst

caracara said:


> Is "nothing" a question, or an answer?


Maybe both?


----------



## Maud Muller

Do I look like I'm having fun?

E.M.


----------



## telracs

Don't people know that I can be random _ad infinitum?_


----------



## telracs

Cobbie said:


> Can't Scarlet be _anything_ ad infinitum?
> 
> And WHEN did you change your avatar? I'm really behind here.


Have you checked out the cartoon thread?

I changed it earlier today.


----------



## Barbiedull

Scarlet, is that a swimsuit, or your red dress?


----------



## telracs

Maybe we should ask Phil Chen?


Spoiler



he's the one who drew it.


----------



## Barbiedull

scarlet said:


> Maybe we should ask Phil Chen?
> 
> 
> Spoiler
> 
> 
> 
> he's the one who drew it.


I hope it's not your dress, won't your birdseed get wet?


Spoiler



I took a peek at the cartoon thread, hadn't seen it before.


----------



## telracs

Didn't the birds already get all the birdseed?



Spoiler



And glad you checked the cartoon thread, Phil and R2 are really good.


----------



## Maud Muller

Is that your nose or are you eating a banana?

E.M.

(Sorry)


----------



## Ann in Arlington

Who is General Tsao and why does he have a chicken?


----------



## Barbiedull

Ann in Arlington said:


> Who is General Tsao and why does he have a chicken?


Maybe he stole the chicken from Colonel Sanders?


Spoiler



Could it be a military maneuver?


----------



## Susan in VA

Ann in Arlington said:


> Who is General Tsao and why does he have a chicken?


And how are you supposed to eat those big chunks with just a fork (or chopsticks)?



Spoiler



(My neighborhood Chinese restaurant has a dish called Ms. Tso's Chicken... supposedly named after the general's daughter... the chicken chunks are smaller and you can eat them more gracefully.  It's also very slightly milder.)


----------



## div

Why does the power have to go out BEFORE the coffee pot is finished brewing? GRRRRRR


----------



## lonestar

What happened to the cooler weather?


----------



## Brenda Carroll

Susan in VA said:


> And how are you supposed to eat those big chunks with just a fork (or chopsticks)?
> 
> 
> 
> Spoiler
> 
> 
> 
> (My neighborhood Chinese restaurant has a dish called Ms. Tso's Chicken... supposedly named after the general's daughter... the chicken chunks are smaller and you can eat them more gracefully.  It's also very slightly milder.)


I love the General's chicken, but wonder which General it is?


----------



## crebel

Isn't it too hot to eat hot food?


----------



## Brenda Carroll

Is the creme filling that makes the Twinkie or is it the sponge cake?


----------



## lonestar

Isn't it both?


----------



## Jeff

The rain in Spain?


----------



## Dawn McCullough White

When does preschool start?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

Why do I have the feeling someone is watching me? Did I have too much coffee today?


----------



## Tip10

There's such a thing as too much coffee?


----------



## telracs

What's Tactology?


----------



## Brenda Carroll

Who's a Puritan?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

What does any of that have to with the price of tea?


----------



## caracara

What does the price of tea have to do with Life the Universe, and Everything?


----------



## Dawn McCullough White

How do the level of stars relate to the author's name?


----------



## div

Am I the only one excited about the first day of school tomorrow?


----------



## crebel

Dawn McCullough White said:


> How do the level of stars relate to the author's name?


Do you really want to know? http://www.kboards.com/index.php/topic,32340.0.html


----------



## lonestar

Is that in the script?


----------



## caracara

div said:


> Am I the only one excited about the first day of school tomorrow?


Do you realize that I started two weeks ago, so I can not adequately answer your question?


----------



## Dawn McCullough White

crebel said:


> Do you really want to know? http://www.kboards.com/index.php/topic,32340.0.html


13 pages


----------



## lonestar

Who thought that up?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

How did I spill something on me already?


----------



## crebel

Dawn McCullough White said:


> 13 pages


Did you read it?


----------



## Dawn McCullough White

crebel said:


> Did you read it?


Does skimming count?


----------



## crebel

Dawn McCullough White said:


> Does skimming count?


Did skimming answer your random question?


----------



## Tip10

Did you randomly skim?


----------



## JL Bryan

Why is "rigmarole" spelled "rigmarole" when it rolls so much nicer as "rig-A-marole"?


----------



## JL Bryan

Is there an invisible "a"?  Like a silent "e"?


----------



## JL Bryan

Why can't we just spell it "rigamarole"?  Why do we have to go through all the rigmarole of writing it one way and saying it another?


----------



## Dawn McCullough White

Tip10 said:


> Did you randomly skim?


Can you skim thoroughly?


----------



## Susan in VA

How can this thread still be just as loony after 72 pages?


----------



## telracs

Susan in VA said:


> How can this thread still be just as loony after 72 pages?


Because you're here? Or because I'm here?


----------



## Susan in VA

Ha! If there were a poll on the looniest person around here, and the choices were just you or me, who do _you _think would win??



Spoiler



"scarlet wins landslide victory"


----------



## telracs

Should the looniest person be our next poll?


----------



## Susan in VA

Wouldn't the results be much too predictable?


----------



## telracs

Should I be insulted?


----------



## Susan in VA

If you felt insulted, would that give you an excuse to have a little more chocolate?  

(OTOH, does anyone really need an excuse for that?)


----------



## telracs

did you know that Godiva now has red velvet truffles?


----------



## Victorine

scarlet said:


> did you know that Godiva now has red velvet truffles?


Have you tried them?


----------



## Susan in VA

That would be your two favorite goodies combined, yes?


----------



## lonestar

Do you need an excuse to have chocolate?


----------



## telracs

Victorine said:


> Have you tried them?


Would it surprise you if I said no?



Spoiler



actually, I've tried the new carrot cake, tiramisu, cheese cake and chocolate lava ones.


----------



## telracs

Cobbie said:


> OMG, will this madness ever stop?


May I hope not?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

Alle Meine Entchen said:


> How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood?


A woodchuck could chuck as much as a woodchuck could chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood, right?


----------



## telracs

Valmore Daniels said:


> A woodchuck could chuck as much as a woodchuck could chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood, right?


Are you trying to make my migraine worse?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

scarlet said:


> Are you trying to make my migraine worse?


Why would I do that?


----------



## telracs

Do you want to know how yummy the red velvet truffle is?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

Why isn't my pizza here yet?


----------



## Barbiedull

scarlet said:


> Do you want to know how yummy the red velvet truffle is?


Which is the best of the new Godiva flavors?


Spoiler



I'm not too into truffles, but my Husband LOVES Godiva. He likes to give them to me at Christmas...knowing I will eventually leave them for him...


----------



## telracs

barbiedull said:


> Which is the best of the new Godiva flavors?
> 
> 
> Spoiler
> 
> 
> 
> I'm not too into truffles, but my Husband LOVES Godiva. He likes to give them to me at Christmas...knowing I will eventually leave them for him...


Of the bakery dessert limited edition?



Spoiler



the chocolate lava is really yummy, and I love the cheescake and tiramisu. the carrot cake is too gingery for me. the red velvet is nothing special.


----------



## Barbiedull

Spoiler



Thanks Scarlet. Sounds like flavors he would really love.



Now for my random question...

Why do so many people get hit by trains lately? Are the tracks hiding?


----------



## Barbiedull

Cobbie said:


> Do you think cell phones have anything to do with it?


Maybe the cell phone is sending a subliminal message to walk on the track?



Spoiler



One person was hired to study the effects trains have on wildlife
in our area...he had to be very aware of the train. Just makes you wonder
why people are so distracted they don't hear a train?


----------



## Brenda Carroll

Is that a flying saucer and if so, where is the cup?


----------



## telracs

Brendan Carroll said:


> Is that a flying saucer and if so, where is the cup?


And what is in the cup?


----------



## Brenda Carroll

Is it half full or half empty?


----------



## lonestar

Is it a hot toddy?


----------



## telracs

lonestar said:


> Is it a hot toddy?


In this weather?


----------



## Brenda Carroll

Is it ever too hot for a toddy?


----------



## telracs

Brendan Carroll said:


> Is it ever too hot for a toddy?


Doesn't that depend on the toddy we're discussing?


----------



## Brenda Carroll

What if depends on who you are drinking it with?


----------



## Susan in VA

Speaking of which -- Brendan, do the characters in all your books drink as much as they do in _Tempo_?



Spoiler



I'm a third into the book and half a dozen characters have consumed more booze in a week than I could in a lifetime.


----------



## Jeff

Speaking of Brendan's books, where is Meridith Sinclair?


----------



## Brenda Carroll

What does it mean: an addiction to Instant Messaging, Miss Sinclair?


----------



## telracs

Brendan Carroll said:


> What does it mean: an addiction to Instant Messaging, Miss Sinclair?


do we need to stage an intervention?


----------



## lonestar

Who would be called to intervene?


----------



## telracs

Ghostbusters?


----------



## lonestar

Did you call them?


----------



## Jeff

Call who what?


----------



## loonlover

Why?


----------



## durphy

Why is it workaholic? What is workahol?


----------



## lonestar

Is there an e at the end of that?


----------



## telracs

durphy said:


> Why is it workaholic? What is workahol?


Isn't it coffee?


----------



## durphy

Maybe it's work ick.

Is my hizzle on fizzle?


----------



## telracs

durphy said:


> Maybe it's work ick.
> 
> Is my hizzle on fizzle?


what you been drinking, friend?

and why aren't you sharing?


----------



## lonestar

It's all gone?


----------



## Barbiedull

What was it?


----------



## Margaret

Don't you remember?


----------



## Jeff

Remember what? Oh, shiny?


----------



## telracs

did someone say something?


----------



## Jeff

Do you hear what I hear?


----------



## Barbiedull

Maybe it made a sound, but I forgot to listen?


----------



## Jeff

If a tree falls on you in the forest and nobody's there to hear it, are you likely to be hurt?


----------



## Barbiedull

Why was I in the forest alone? Did someone dump me there?


----------



## Jeff

Didn't your mother tell you to never go into the forest alone?


----------



## telracs

have you seen my red cape?


----------



## Jeff

Afraid of the big-bad-wolf?


----------



## Barbiedull

Jeff said:


> Didn't your mother tell you to never go into the forest alone?
> 
> 
> 
> Spoiler
> 
> 
> 
> No, she didn't... and I thought she had warnings for EVERYTHING!
> 
> 
> 
> Was I the only little girl who read "Little Red Riding Hood" and wondered what happened AFTER she was eaten by the wolf? I was going to say "I was strange", then realized I still AM.


----------



## lonestar

Whatever happened to the neighborhood where the pigs lived?


----------



## Jeff

Wasn't it condemned after all those houses collapsed?


----------



## telracs

did the wolves pay to rebuild it?


----------



## Jeff

Wasn't it the brick masons?


----------



## lonestar

Is Brick Mason a movie star or rock star?


----------



## Jeff

No, wasn't that Perry Mason?


----------



## Barbiedull

Who invented the mason jar?


----------



## Jeff

How many masons will fit in a Mason jar?


----------



## lonestar

Have they been working out?


----------



## Barbiedull

Does the lid have to fit on the jar?


----------



## Jeff

How do you keep the lid on a jar full of masons?


----------



## Barbiedull

Are they vacuum packed?


----------



## Jeff

Wouldn't that be painful?


----------



## Barbiedull

If we put them in a jar in the forest, and no one can hear them scream...are they still in pain?


----------



## Jeff

If no one can hear them are they really screaming?


----------



## Barbiedull

If they're vacuum packed, would they be _able_ to scream?


----------



## lonestar

Can we use a foodsaver?


----------



## Barbiedull

How many masons can you get in a foodsaver bag?


----------



## lonestar

Are you volunteering to count them?


----------



## Vegas_Asian

I wonder how many words rhyme with mason?


----------



## lonestar

Could we use raisin?


----------



## Barbiedull

lonestar said:


> Are you volunteering to count them?


Are you volunteering to bag them?


Spoiler



If you bag them, will they no longer be known as "freemasons"?


----------



## crebel

barbiedull said:


> Are you volunteering to bag them?
> 
> 
> Spoiler
> 
> 
> 
> If you bag them, will they no longer be known as "freemasons"?


I thought this was hilarious, didn't you?


----------



## Annalog

barbiedull said:


> Are you volunteering to bag them?
> 
> 
> Spoiler
> 
> 
> 
> If you bag them, will they no longer be known as "freemasons"?





crebel said:


> I thought this was hilarious, didn't you?


Definitely. Is there anyone who doesn't?


----------



## lonestar

I'll bag, will you count?  And if they scream, will we listen?


----------



## Barbiedull

lonestar said:


> I'll bag, will you count? And if they scream, will we listen?


I will count if it counts? 


Spoiler



We must listen if they scream.


----------



## Barbiedull

Cobbie said:


> Says who?


Aren't we still formulating our strategy?
Do you have an alternate plan?


----------



## Jeff

Girl fight?


----------



## Barbiedull

Jeff said:


> Girl fight?


Partners in crime?


----------



## lonestar

Jeff said:


> Girl fight?


You in?


----------



## Barbiedull

Where's Jeff?

I hope he isn't setting the masons free.


----------



## telracs

barbiedull said:


> I hope he isn't setting the masons free.


Didn't you know I've already done that?


----------



## telracs

Cobbie said:


> Are we now playing "find the mason"s?


Is that a new song?


----------



## Jeff

Can I come out now?


----------



## telracs

Jeff said:


> Can I come out now?


Did you finish your homework?


----------



## Barbiedull

Scarlet, what are you going to do with all those masons?


----------



## telracs

barbiedull said:


> Scarlet, what are you going to do with all those masons?


Didn't you see that I let them go?


----------



## Barbiedull

Where did they go? I was supposed to count them!


----------



## telracs

barbiedull said:


> Where did they go? I was supposed to count them!


How about an estimate of them?


----------



## Jeff

Would that be an estimason?


----------



## Barbiedull

Jeff said:


> Would that be an estimason?


If you find more than you estimate, is it an extramason?


----------



## Jeff

Wouldn't it be missedmasons?


----------



## Barbiedull

Jeff said:


> Wouldn't it be missedmasons?


Are they still missing?


----------



## Maud Muller

I'm printing out all these posts and putting them in my Masonary Jar


----------



## Maud Muller

oops that wasn't a question. How about 

Should I print out all these posts and keep them in a masonary jar?


----------



## jbh13md

Ever hear the one about the carpenter and the blind man?


----------



## JennaAnderson

The carpenter from Biblical times or Joe the Carpenter?
Or was that Joe the Plumber?


----------



## lonestar

What happened to my foodsaver?


----------



## telracs

lonestar said:


> What happened to my foodsaver?


Did the masons take it?

Why doesn't the tour company I like go to Scotland in October?


----------



## Jeff

Does the tour company know you'll be there in October?


----------



## Brenda Carroll

Do they have October in Scotland?


----------



## lonestar

Why wouldn't they?


----------



## Barbiedull

Jeff said:


> Does the tour company know you'll be there in October?


Scarlet, are they watching you?
Do they know about this board?
How are they a tour company if they don't tour?
Don't they like Scotland?
What do they have against October?
I'd like to give them a piece of my mind..


Spoiler



but I think I'm missing a couple brain cells already..


----------



## Maud Muller

Do you think I'm prettier than your ex-wife?

and

Did you ever take her to Scotland?

and

If you did, are you going to take me to Scotland some day?


----------



## telracs

Do any tour companies go to Scotland in late October?


----------



## The Hooded Claw

Will we ever run out of questions in this thread?

and of course....

When will the Kindle 4 be out?


----------



## Jeff

You don't have your K4 yet?


----------



## Barbiedull

Eileen Muller said:


> Do you think I'm prettier than your ex-wife?


Scarlet has an ex-wife?


----------



## Jeff

Is nothing sacred?


----------



## telracs

How can I, when I've never been married?


----------



## The Hooded Claw

Jeff said:


> You don't have your K4 yet?


I got a "shipping soon" notice, but if it had shipped I'd be asking "where is my K4?"


----------



## The Hooded Claw

scarlet said:


> How can I, when I've never been married?


Nonsense, Scarlet. We all know about when you ran off to Vegas with The Riddler, and how it was annulled three days later. No sense pretending about it.


----------



## Jeff

The Hooded Claw said:


> Nonsense, Scarlet. We all know about when you ran off to Vegas with The Riddler, and how it was annulled three days later. No sense pretending about it.


Any truth to this?


----------



## Barbiedull

The Hooded Claw said:


> Nonsense, Scarlet. We all know about when you ran off to Vegas with The Riddler, and how it was annulled three days later. No sense pretending about it.


Scarlet, and the Riddler? If he didn't give his real name, you weren't legally married anyway! (I think...)


----------



## telracs

The Hooded Claw said:


> Nonsense, Scarlet. We all know about when you ran off to Vegas with The Riddler, and how it was annulled three days later. No sense pretending about it.





barbiedull said:


> Scarlet, and the Riddler? If he didn't give his real name, you weren't legally married anyway! (I think...)





Jeff said:


> Any truth to this?


Excuse me?

When did they let the 3 of you out of Arkham?

Or did they finally get internet at Arkham?


----------



## The Hooded Claw

scarlet said:


> Excuse me?
> 
> When did they let the 3 of you out of Arkham?
> 
> Or did they finally get internet at Arkham?


Oooh, you mean it wasn't really annulled?


----------



## telracs

Why aren't you at work?


----------



## The Hooded Claw

scarlet said:


> Why aren't you at work?


Why am I inside on my vacation day?


----------



## Tip10

Isn't what happens in Vegas supposed to stay in Vegas?
So wasn't she only legally married in Vegas?
Which means since she's in NY she was never married?
Aren't all Vegas marriages annuled as soon as you leave Vegas?


----------



## Barbiedull

scarlet said:


> Excuse me?
> 
> When did they let the 3 of you out of Arkham?
> 
> Or did they finally get internet at Arkham?


Crazy is as crazy does...which one of us married the Riddler in Vegas? hmmm...??


----------



## telracs

When did I ever SAY I got married?

Didn't I say I haven't been married?


----------



## Barbiedull

scarlet said:


> When did I ever SAY I got married?
> 
> Didn't I say I haven't been married?


Riddle me this Mrs. Riddler (or not)...why is "The Hooded Claw" spreading these rumors?


----------



## telracs

barbiedull said:


> Riddle me this Mrs. Riddler (or not)...why is "The Hooded Claw" spreading these rumors?


Why don't you ask him?


----------



## Jeff

Who are you gonna believe - Scarlet or the Hooded Claw?


----------



## telracs

Jeff said:


> Who are you gonna believe - Scarlet or the Hooded Claw?


You're kidding, right?


----------



## Jeff

You really don't expect us to believe a meanie from New York, do you?


----------



## The Hooded Claw

How could anyone not trust a melodrama villain in a green cape and purple suit?


----------



## Barbiedull

Jeff said:


> You really don't expect us to believe a meanie from New York, do you?


 Jeff, you didn't vote for Scarlet in the "Queen of Mean" thread, did you?


----------



## Annalog

Is there anyone in that poll that Jeff hasn't voted for? Other?


----------



## Jeff

Haven't I explained that my vote goes to the highest bidder?


----------



## Barbiedull

Jeff said:


> Haven't I explained that my vote goes to the highest bidder?


Did they want you to vote FOR them?


----------



## Jeff

Other than Ed and Scarlet?


----------



## telracs

Jeff said:


> Other than Ed and Scarlet?


Does anyone really think I'm gonna pay for votes?


----------



## Tip10

barbiedull said:


> Riddle me this


Ohh, is Barbie trying to impersonate the Riddler? What fiendish schemes are being hatched? Is there an unterior motive at play here?


----------



## Jeff

scarlet said:


> Does anyone really think I'm gonna pay for votes?


You mean you want the chocolates back?


----------



## Barbiedull

Tip10 said:


> Ohh, is Barbie trying to impersonate the Riddler? What fiendish schemes are being hatched? Is there an unterior motive at play here?


Scarlet is Mrs. Riddler, and she called ME crazy?


Spoiler



I was only trying to confuse her so she would confess!


----------



## lonestar

Jeff said:


> You mean you want the chocolates back?


YOU have the chocolates?


----------



## Maud Muller

Would whoever has the chocolate please send me some?


----------



## Susan in VA

If you're going to continue like this, could you send me some aspirin instead?


----------



## telracs

How about some ibuprofen instead?


----------



## Susan in VA

Who said anything about _your_ madness?

I'm just thinking about _my_ head...


----------



## telracs

Maybe she's taking the pain killers to prevent the onset of maddness?


----------



## telracs

You haven't been following McAffee's ever-name-changing thread?


----------



## lonestar

Isn't chocolate good for headache and madness?


----------



## Hippie2MARS

lonestar said:


> Isn't chocolate good for headache and madness?


Chocolate is good for whatever ails you. True story....


----------



## Maud Muller

Isn't ale good for whatever ails you?


----------



## Tip10

Why is Cobbie's madness in Susan's head?


----------



## Susan in VA

Who said anything about _Cobbie's_ madness?

I was thinking collective madness... kind of like the Borg heavily stoned...


----------



## telracs

Are we all just figment's of Susan's


Spoiler



warped


 imagination?


----------



## Brenda Carroll

Guess who's cooking chili?!



Spoiler



Chili will cure what ails you, too.


----------



## Susan in VA

scarlet said:


> Are we all just figment's of Susan's
> 
> 
> Spoiler
> 
> 
> 
> warped
> 
> 
> imagination?


Do you seriously think I'd be creative enough to come up with all you weird people? 


Spoiler



That's what authors are for.


----------



## intinst

What do you mean, "Weird people?"


Spoiler



I resemble that remark!


----------



## Brenda Carroll

Don't authors 'assemble' weird people?


----------



## telracs

Who came up with the authors?

Are we all products of Harvey's psyche?


----------



## Tip10

Ah, sort of a 

Who came first -- the writer or the reader?


----------



## Jeff

Aren't writers and readers two sides of the same coin?


----------



## Brenda Carroll

How do coins know if their two sides match?


----------



## Jeff

Split personalities?


----------



## telracs

Jeff said:


> Split personalities?


You or me?


----------



## Tip10

Split or multiple?


----------



## telracs

Bananna or hot fudge?


----------



## Jeff

Isn't that avatar cheesecake?


----------



## Tip10

Is it cheesecake or trolling for beefcake?


----------



## Brenda Carroll

Did someone say split personalities?  Did someone say split personalities?  Did someone say split personalities?


----------



## telracs

Is it chili yet?


----------



## Maud Muller

Did somebody mention Eve?


----------



## lonestar

Resistance is futile, isn't it?


----------



## Brenda Carroll

scarlet said:


> Is it chili yet?


Do we have cornbread to go with it?


----------



## crebel

It's the law to have cornbread with chili, isn't it?


----------



## loonlover

In Iowa?  Isn't cornbread a southern thing?


----------



## Maud Muller

Do they serve cornbread in Chile?


----------



## crebel

loonlover said:


> In Iowa? Isn't cornbread a southern thing?


I'm in southern Iowa, does that count?


----------



## telracs

And Boston Market?


----------



## lonestar

What do I do with all the business cards I have collected?


----------



## Maud Muller

Ain't I already edjucated if I gratuated sixth grade?


----------



## Susan in VA

Cobbie said:


> Did I have food on the brain, or what?


That depends. Are you a squirrel, and do you live in Tennessee?


----------



## Maud Muller

Susan,

Is the squirrel in your profile picture from Tennessee?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

Cobbie said:


> Don't you _always_ have to have cornbread with chili?


Served over rice or noodles?


----------



## lonestar

Chili over rice or noodles?


----------



## Ann in Arlington

Cincinnati style? or Texas Style?


----------



## Barbiedull

Why is it that some days I look at this thread, shake my head and back away?



Spoiler



But, most days it makes perfect sense!



My Husband serves chili over rice too...I'd never heard of it before.
In my family it was served with cornbread or crackers.


----------



## Jeff

Every try chili over Fritos?


----------



## Barbiedull

Jeff said:


> Every try chili over Fritos?





Spoiler



No, but I love fritos. We've used tortilla chips before.


Should I try it?


----------



## Tip10

Jeff said:


> Every try chili over Fritos?


Routinely, topped with cheese, and onions (and for DW sour cream)!!

Only way to eat chili, well not quite, also goes well on top of a cheese omelet!!

Chili cheese omelets anyone?


----------



## telracs

I wonder if I can talk Paula into getting chili for lunch today?


----------



## Barbiedull

Tip10 said:


> Routinely, topped with cheese, and onions (and for DW sour cream)!!


This sounds great...who's making lunch?


----------



## lonestar

Jeff said:


> Every try chili over Fritos?


We call it Frito Chili Pie, don't you?


----------



## Jeff

Doesn't pie have a crust?


----------



## Barbiedull

Jeff said:


> Doesn't pie have a crust?


Are the fritos considered the crust?


----------



## Tip10

Hmm, Frito Pie here doesn't contain chili at all, its made with bar-b-que beef or pork, do you have something like that by a different name?


----------



## Brenda Carroll

lonestar said:


> Chili over rice or noodles?


Does anyone eat it over saltines?


----------



## Maud Muller

Isn't the best way to eat chili to boil white potatoes, smush them with a fork and put the chili on top? And shouldn't the chili be made of ground beef, onions, chili powder, tomato paste and Brooks chili hot beans only? 

I can't get Brooks chili hot beans in Florida so would someone please send me a virtual case via this thread? 


(Can you believe I managed to make all of that questions?)

Eileen


----------



## telracs

Chili over potatoes? Really?



Spoiler



we're getting chili tacos for dinner.


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

Haven't you had chili on a baked potato? How about on a hot dog?


----------



## Barbiedull

Eileen


Spoiler



Out of stock right now, but check this link. http://www.meijer.com/s/brooks-chili-hot-beans-in-chili-sauce-pack-of-24-15-5-oz-ea/_/R-126220



Eileen is cooking, who wants dinner?


----------



## Brenda Carroll

Eileen Muller said:


> Isn't the best way to eat chili to boil white potatoes, smush them with a fork and put the chili on top? And shouldn't the chili be made of ground beef, onions, chili powder, tomato paste and Brooks chili hot beans only?
> 
> I can't get Brooks chili hot beans in Florida so would someone please send me a virtual case via this thread?
> 
> (Can you believe I managed to make all of that questions?)
> 
> Eileen


Isn't it better to bake the taters? Wouldn't even be better with some shredded cheddar on top? Have you ever had Wolf Brand Chili?


----------



## telracs

mom133d said:


> Haven't you had chili on a baked potato? How about on a hot dog?





Spoiler



no and no


----------



## crebel

Scarlet, do you know you have been deprived without chili on a baked potato or hot dog?


----------



## Jeff

Scarlet? You've never had a Coney Island hot dog?


----------



## Brenda Carroll

Scarlet, did you know that you have broken my heart with sadness?


----------



## telracs

crebel said:


> Scarlet, do you know you have been deprived without chili on a baked potato or hot dog?





Jeff said:


> Scarlet? You've never had a Coney Island hot dog?





Brendan Carroll said:


> Scarlet, did you know that you have broken my heart with sadness?


Is it okay if I don't feel deprived?
And how can I mend a broken heart?


----------



## Annalog

Does anyone know what ingredient, possibly a spice, in some chilis that could cause an allergic reaction? Am I very glad that the one ingredient that would cause my throat to close after eating a small bite is not found in most chilis? Do I wish I knew what it was so that I could avoid the dangerous chilis? Do I still eat chili, albeit cautiously, anyway?


----------



## Annalog

How can I stop the rain from falling down?


----------



## telracs

why does this site think I'm in Boston?


----------



## NogDog

scarlet said:


> why does this site think I'm in Boston?


It's the green skin.

Green = Irish. Lots of Irish in Boston. Get it?

Ah...forget it.


----------



## libbyfh

Do you come here often?


----------



## Brenda Carroll

Annalog said:


> Does anyone know what ingredient, possibly a spice, in some chilis that could cause an allergic reaction? Am I very glad that the one ingredient that would cause my throat to close after eating a small bite is not found in most chilis? Do I wish I knew what it was so that I could avoid the dangerous chilis? Do I still eat chili, albeit cautiously, anyway?


Could it be cumin/cumino that is not used in all chilis?


----------



## NogDog

Brendan Carroll said:


> Could it be cumin/cumino that is not used in all chilis?


Some contain paprika, and probably even rarer are cinnamon or cocoa (e.g. Cincinnati style).


----------



## lonestar

How can you stop the sun from shining?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

So, who had chili for dinner?


----------



## Barbiedull

lonestar said:


> How can you stop the sun from shining?


What makes the world go round?


----------



## telracs

mom133d said:


> So, who had chili for dinner?


Me!

So, why does booking airline tickets always make my stomach cramp?


----------



## Jeff

Could it be the chili instead of the reservations?


----------



## lonestar

barbiedull said:


> What makes the world go round?


How can you mend this broken man?


----------



## Barbiedull

lonestar said:


> How can you mend this broken man?


How can a loser ever win?


----------



## Jeff

By blaming it all on the nights of Broadway?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

If they are joined together, why are they called _*apart*_ments?


----------



## NogDog

Why does a televised NFL game consist of, in descending order of time spent:

1. Commercials
2. Commentators discussing several replays of the preceding play
3. Commentators discussing things not directly related to the current game
4. Referees explaining why they just threw their hankies (followed up by the commentators commentating on that)
5. An actual, live play by the players

?


----------



## telracs

Am I crazy to be flying from Scotland to NY in November?


----------



## telracs

Cobbie said:


> Are we watching the same game?


Aren't they all the same?


----------



## NogDog

Cobbie said:


> Are we watching the same game?


Nope, I'm not watching any game. I was just thinking about how I don't particularly enjoy watching football any more.


----------



## lonestar

Does anyone have any chocolate?


----------



## Jeff

No chocolate - how about chili?


----------



## Annalog

Brendan and NogDog, thanks for the suggestions but I have eaten cumin, paprika, cinnamon, and cocoa without adverse reactions. Will I remember to ask for the ingredients next time it happens? Will it be a spice or a preservative? Will it happen with anything else? Will I stop typing not really random questions?


----------



## telracs

lonestar said:


> Does anyone have any chocolate?


Plenty, but how can I get it to you?


----------



## Maud Muller

Did you know that only eleven minutes of a football game are actually devoted to playing the game?


----------



## RichardDR

quote]Did you know that only eleven minutes of a football game are actually devoted to playing the game?[/quote]

Hmm...
Thirty seconds per player on the field? How do they get so dirty and sweaty?!
...and why do they look SO TIRED?


----------



## crebel

What's For Dinner?

Did anyone hear a rumor threads were being combined?


----------



## telracs

crebel said:


> What's For Dinner?
> 
> Did anyone hear a rumor threads were being combined?


Are we talking chili again?


----------



## lonestar

scarlet said:


> Plenty, but how can I get it to you?


beam it over, okay?


----------



## Barbiedull

lonestar said:


> beam it over, okay?


Would the beam melt the chocolate?


----------



## Annalog

Could you use Willy Wonka's television equipment?


----------



## telracs

Annalog said:


> Could you use Willy Wonka's television equipment?


Wouldn't that make it too small to enjoy?


----------



## crebel

scarlet said:


> Wouldn't that make it too small to enjoy?


Are you saying size matters?


----------



## telracs

crebel said:


> Are you saying size matters?


In chocolate, isn't more better?


----------



## Annalog

Couldn't the chocolate then be stretched in the taffy pulling machine?


----------



## telracs

Have you told someone how much you appreciate them today?


----------



## Annalog

Yes. Have you been told how much you are appreciated?


----------



## telracs

Annalog said:


> Yes. Have you been told how much you are appreciated?


Who? Me?


----------



## Annalog

Why not you?


----------



## Annalog

Does long distance appreciation count?


----------



## telracs

Annalog said:


> Does long distance appreciation count?


Always. Thanks.

why did the salad bar guy cram so much lettuce into the container?


----------



## Barbiedull

scarlet said:


> Have you told someone how much you appreciate them today?


Yes, I did...isn't that ironic?


----------



## Brenda Carroll

barbiedull said:


> Yes, I did...isn't that ironic?


So did I... isn't it amazing?


----------



## telracs

Have I started something good?

Should I start an appreciation thread?


----------



## Brenda Carroll

wouldn't it be a shame not to?


----------



## Alle Meine Entchen

am I a bad mother for feeling glad when bedtime arrives (for DD, not me)?


----------



## telracs

Alle Meine Entchen said:


> am I a bad mother for feeling glad when bedtime arrives (for DD, not me)?


aren't we all happy when bedtime arrives?


----------



## Barbiedull

Alle Meine Entchen said:


> am I a bad mother for feeling glad when bedtime arrives (for DD, not me)?


Wouldn't it be great if Moms had as much energy as the children?
A bad Mother wouldn't feel bad for wanting bedtime! Right?


----------



## Jeff

Should I admit that my best friend is two years old?


----------



## lonestar

Jeff said:


> Should I admit that my best friend is two years old?


What could it hurt?


----------



## telracs

anybody up for a Saturday night chat?


----------



## Jeff

What time?


----------



## telracs

how's about now?

oh and is your 2 year old friend human?


----------



## Jeff

scarlet said:


> oh and is your 2 year old friend human?













scarlet said:


> how's about now?


Can't right now. If you're still there later can I drop in?


----------



## telracs

Your grandson?



Spoiler



And I don't know how long I'll be on, I have the Komen walk in the morning.


----------



## Barbiedull

He's a cutie Jeff, and you really do wear the hat?


----------



## Jeff

You haven't noticed all my bragging posts about my great-grandson?


----------



## Barbiedull

Scarlet, can I borrow some of your energy?


----------



## telracs

barbiedull said:


> Scarlet, can I borrow some of your energy?


After my walk tomorrow?

Actually, not until Monday, okay?


----------



## Barbiedull

scarlet said:


> After my walk tomorrow?
> 
> Actually, not until Monday, okay?


Deal! How long is the walk?


----------



## telracs

barbiedull said:


> Deal! How long is the walk?


What's the conversion of 5 k to miles?

Actually, the walk itself will be about 3 miles but then afterwards we need to get OUT of Central Park and get back to the subway. Then we're going to lunch and walk from the restaurant down to the mall.... so it'll be a hiking day. Then September 26th is the Alzheimer's Walk and sometime in October is the ACS walk.

Wanna make a donation?


----------



## Barbiedull

Jeff said:


> You haven't noticed all my bragging posts about my great-grandson?


Jeff, I answered this post already...and it didn't post...maybe I forgot to hit send?
I can't believe you're a GREAT-GRANDPA! You wear it well, and he's adorable.


----------



## Barbiedull

scarlet said:


> What's the conversion of 5 k to miles?
> 
> Actually, the walk itself will be about 3 miles but then afterwards we need to get OUT of Central Park and get back to the subway. Then we're going to lunch and walk from the restaurant down to the mall.... so it'll be a hiking day. Then September 26th is the Alzheimer's Walk and sometime in October is the ACS walk.
> 
> Wanna make a donation?


How do I make a donation?

Sounds like a fun day, and a great cause.


----------



## Jeff

barbiedull said:


> I can't believe you're a GREAT-GRANDPA!


I have a nine-year-old great-granddaughter who's a Barbie fan - can I have your autograph?


----------



## crebel

How come there is nobody in chat?


----------



## Maud Muller

Why doesn't anybody like me?


----------



## telracs

Eileen Muller said:


> Why doesn't anybody like me?


Why do you think that?


----------



## Jeff

Eileen Muller said:


> Why doesn't anybody like me?


Who says they don't?


----------



## Barbiedull

Jeff said:


> I have a nine-year-old great-granddaughter who's a Barbie fan - can I have your autograph?


Of course Jeff. I'm as real as any other Barbie, right?


----------



## Alle Meine Entchen

why did DH ever think Taco Bell was a good place to eat?


----------



## lonestar

Eileen Muller said:


> Why doesn't anybody like me?





Cobbie said:


> Don't I like you?


Don't I like you too?


----------



## Jeff

Don't we all like everybody?


----------



## Jeff

Isn't there room for all?


----------



## crebel

Cobbie said:


> LOL...
> 
> Are we all going to the loony bin?


When did we get out?


----------



## Jeff

Do we really need another lock for the Panama Canal?


----------



## Jeff

Cobbie said:


> Do you think the new locks will cut down on traffic jams?


In the basement?


Spoiler



Think Arsenic and Old Lace.


----------



## Brenda Carroll

Should we have new locks or smaller ships?


----------



## Jeff

More locks or smaller corpses you mean?


----------



## Jeff

Do you think I was a little too subtle with the Arsenic and Old Lace connection to the loony-bin question?


----------



## Jeff

Do you expect me to face facts?


----------



## telracs

haven't we already discussed Arsenic and Old Lace?


----------



## Jeff

Is there a rule that I missed?


----------



## telracs

Jeff said:


> Is there a rule that I missed?


about repeating ourselves?


----------



## Jeff

Did I ask that question before?


----------



## Jeff

Is anyone interested enough to read 85 pages of random thoughts?


----------



## Jeff

Does anyone in their right mind post on this thread?


----------



## caracara

Whats wrong with the left part of the brain?


----------



## Jeff

Doesn't the right brain control random thoughts?


----------



## Frank Martin

Cobbie said:


> Why am I now trying to find out which side of my brain is dominant?
> 
> (and why do I care?)


Which side is in charge of caring?


----------



## Barbiedull

Jeff said:


> Does anyone in their right mind post on this thread?


 Does anyone in their right mind ANSWER these questions?


----------



## Barbiedull

Cobbie said:


> Why am I now trying to find out which side of my brain is dominant?
> 
> (and why do I care?)


 How do you find out which side is in charge?


----------



## caracara

Doesn't it have something to do with personality, and if you prefer math or English, or something like that?


----------



## Barbiedull

caracara said:


> Doesn't it have something to do with personality, and if you prefer math or English, or something like that?


 Now I need personality too?


Spoiler



Back to the drawing board...


----------



## Brenda Carroll

Hasn't anyone qualified on firearms?


Spoiler



(There is a simply test they perform to determine left/right brain dominance)


----------



## Barbiedull

Brendan Carroll said:


> Hasn't anyone qualified on firearms?
> 
> 
> Spoiler
> 
> 
> 
> (There is a simply test they perform to determine left/right brain dominance)


My brain is unqualified on firearms. Does the test determine if you're likely to shoot before you think?


----------



## Jeff

Does ready, fire, aim apply to you?


----------



## Annalog

I have not shot aspirins from the air; have you?


----------



## Brenda Carroll

barbiedull said:


> My brain is unqualified on firearms. Does the test determine if you're likely to shoot before you think?


What do you think of psychiatrists? Fairies? UFO's? Rehab?


----------



## telracs

Brendan Carroll said:


> What do you think of psychiatrists? Fairies? UFO's? Rehab?


Is this series supposed to make sense to me?


----------



## Barbiedull

Brendan Carroll said:


> What do you think of psychiatrists? Fairies? UFO's? Rehab?


I think I can do without all of them, how about you?


----------



## Barbiedull

Jeff said:


> Does ready, fire, aim apply to you?


 It probably would, so I think I'll stay away from guns?


----------



## telracs

You don't like fairies?


----------



## Barbiedull

scarlet said:


> You don't like fairies?


 I don't dislike them...if that helps?
I'd rather see a fairy than a psychiatrist...


----------



## crebel

Did you know Scarlet is telling everybody that the "Stupidest Question Ever" can be found in this thread?

Which one do you think it is?


----------



## Jeff

Did she start a poll?


----------



## crebel

Would she have to list every question on here?


----------



## Jeff

Would anyone, even Scarlet, list twenty-seven-hundred stupid questions?


----------



## crebel

So is this now officially the "Another truly stupid question" thread instead of "Another truly random question"?


----------



## telracs

crebel said:


> Did you know Scarlet is telling everybody that the "Stupidest Question Ever" can be found in this thread?


Am I being taken out of context again?


----------



## Jeff

You have a context? Where has it been?


----------



## telracs

With my marbles?


----------



## Barbiedull

Can't you just buy more context in the Kindle store?


----------



## crebel

scarlet said:


> Am I being taken out of context again?


Would I take you out of context? 



scarlet said:


> off topic- this is not even close to the stupidest question, check out the random question thread for those.


ETA: Context


----------



## lonestar

What the heck?


----------



## caracara

Why did you come to this thread if you wanted to not be going "What the heck?"?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

Don't you just love this thread?


----------



## caracara

Was that not implied by the insane amount of time I spend reading it? =)


----------



## Susan in VA

barbiedull said:


> I'd rather see a fairy than a psychiatrist...


If you saw a fairy, wouldn't you _need_ to see a psychiatrist?


----------



## Barbiedull

Susan in VA said:


> If you saw a fairy, wouldn't you _need_ to see a psychiatrist?


Are psychiatrists real too, just like fairies?


----------



## lonestar

caracara said:


> Why did you come to this thread if you wanted to not be going "What the heck?"?


Is what the heck not acceptable?


----------



## Tip10

Why the heck would what the heck not be acceptable?


----------



## lonestar

Tip10 said:


> Why the heck would what the heck not be acceptable?


Yeah, why the heck not?


----------



## BTackitt

Does anyone want to go to class for me today?


----------



## Jeff

Have you noticed that some people ask really random questions?


----------



## Barbiedull

Jeff said:


> Have you noticed that some people ask really random questions?





Spoiler



Like this?


How many times can a kid eat canned spaghetti and goldfish crackers for lunch?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

BTackitt said:


> Does anyone want to go to class for me today?


What is class about?


----------



## Tip10

barbiedull said:


> Spoiler
> 
> 
> 
> Like this?
> 
> 
> How many times can a kid eat canned spaghetti and goldfish crackers for lunch?


What color is the kid's hair?


----------



## BTackitt

Jeff said:


> Have you noticed that some people ask really random questions?


Isn't that the point of this thread?


----------



## Jeff

There's a point to this thread?


----------



## Brenda Carroll

Is that a pointed question?


----------



## Tip10

Wasn't The Point! a Nilsson animated film and musical?


----------



## Barbiedull

Tip10 said:


> What color is the kid's hair?


 The kid has brown hair, (and dimples) does this count?


----------



## telracs

Is anything ever really random?


----------



## Tip10

barbiedull said:


> The kid has brown hair, (and dimples) does this count?


All depends, do brunettes eat more spaghetti than blonds or redheads?


----------



## telracs

Was Al ever able to get on to photobucket?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

Am I going to get any work done now that my K3 has arrived?


----------



## lonestar

What color was their dog?


----------



## Barbiedull

Tip10 said:


> All depends, do brunettes eat more spaghetti than blonds or redheads?


How would I know, I'm not really blonde?


----------



## Jeff

How could you not know if you're blonde?


----------



## lonestar

barbiedull said:


> How would I know, I'm not really blonde?


Don't you have a mirror?


----------



## Barbiedull

Jeff said:


> How could you not know if you're blonde?


Was I having a blonde moment when I thought I was brunette?


----------



## Barbiedull

lonestar said:


> Don't you have a mirror?


Of course I have a mirror, doesn't everyone?
Is my mirror broken if I look in it and always see my Mother?


----------



## lonestar

barbiedull said:


> Of course I have a mirror, doesn't everyone?
> Is my mirror broken if I look in it and always see my Mother?


How did she get in there?


----------



## telracs

mirror mirror on the hull, can you help out barbiedull?


----------



## Jeff

Mirror, mirror, on the net, what about that mean Scarlet?


----------



## telracs

Jeff said:


> Mirror, mirror, on the net, what about that mean Scarlet?


Has everyone voted?

http://www.kboards.com/index.php/topic,33066.0.html


----------



## Steven L. Hawk

Where's Waldo?


----------



## telracs

Steven L. Hawk said:


> Where's Waldo?


Isn't he on the infinity thread?


----------



## Susan in VA

Are you combining threads _again_?


----------



## Vegas_Asian

Dude, where's my car?


----------



## Annalog

Car 54, where are you?


----------



## Tip10

Lost in space?


----------



## lonestar

Is Waldo driving?


----------



## Barbiedull

lonestar said:


> Is Waldo driving?


 I wonder if he gets lost more often than I do?


----------



## Brenda Carroll

Is Waldo with Carmen San Diego?


----------



## caracara

Will we ever find them if they're together?


----------



## Tip10

Where in the world are they?


----------



## Barbiedull

Brendan Carroll said:


> Is Waldo with Carmen San Diego?


Are they on the Oregon Trail?


----------



## lonestar

Have they left the planet?


----------



## Barbiedull

How big is "big brother"?


----------



## Brenda Carroll

Did Waldo and Carmen elope?


----------



## Tip10

Is an elope an electronic ski slope?


----------



## lonestar

Were they married by an Elvis impersonator?


----------



## telracs

would you buy a calendar with my photos?


----------



## Susan in VA

Would those be photos_ by_ you or _of _you?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

Why am I addicted to this thread?


----------



## Susan in VA

Is it because it's the author equivalent of cleaning the fridge?


----------



## Jeff

When one cleans out the fridge there's often a side-benefit of good refrigerator soup - what does this thread have to offer?


----------



## Barbiedull

Jeff said:


> When one cleans out the fridge there's often a side-benefit of good refrigerator soup - what does this thread have to offer?


Can you make Alphabet soup from random words?


----------



## Tip10

Jeff said:


> When one cleans out the fridge there's often a side-benefit of good refrigerator soup - what does this thread have to offer?


Umm, it won't kill you like some of the stuff that comes out of the dark recesses of my refrigerator will?


----------



## telracs

Susan in VA said:


> Would those be photos_ by_ you or _of _you?


Okay, rephrase: Would you buy a calendar with flower pictures taken by me?


----------



## Barbiedull

scarlet said:


> Okay, rephrase: Would you buy a calendar with flower pictures taken by me?


 Are they tulips from Amsterdam that you photographed while riding the tram in the red-light district while on vacation to escape us crazy Americans?


Spoiler



You know, those tulips are SO beautiful, they drove Van Gogh insane just looking at fields and fields full of ramdon tulips...


----------



## telracs

Didn't you know my tulips are all American?


----------



## Barbiedull

scarlet said:


> Didn't you know my tulips are all American?


Do you have a green thumb?


----------



## Tip10

Isn't the rest of you All American too?


----------



## Susan in VA

barbiedull said:


> Can you make Alphabet soup from random words?


 

If scarlet is All-American, why is she green?


----------



## lonestar

Where did I put the keys?


----------



## caracara

Aren't the keys in that safe place so you wouldn't lose them?


----------



## Barbiedull

lonestar said:


> Where did I put the keys?


 Do you think the keys are hiding so you don't go shopping again?


----------



## telracs

Why is there more reflection than reality?


----------



## Barbiedull

scarlet said:


> Why is there more reflection than reality?


Should I take off my rose-colored glasses?


Spoiler



Reality is, my back hurts!


Don't you have an election to campaign for today?


----------



## Brenda Carroll

How do you define reality?


----------



## Jeff

Can you really define reality?


----------



## Alle Meine Entchen

can you believe I tried to make cupcakes from the cupcake thread and forgot to add sugar?  Who forgets to add sugar?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

barbiedull said:


> Do you think the keys are hiding so you don't go shopping again?


Isn't the Internet for shopping?


----------



## libbyfh

Why do people have bad dreams?


----------



## telracs

Cobbie said:


> Does anyone really shop in physical stores?


does the pizzeria count?


----------



## lonestar

Well, how did my keys get THERE?


----------



## crebel

Weren't they in the last place you put them?


----------



## telracs

lonestar said:


> Well, how did my keys get THERE?


did the blue men move things again?


----------



## crebel

lonestar said:


> Well, how did my keys get THERE?


Did Scarlet put them THERE?


----------



## Jeff

Wouldn't that be too mean - even for Scarlet?


----------



## telracs

why would I want lonestar's keys?


----------



## lonestar

Have you _seen my keys?_


----------



## telracs

If I had, wouldn't I tell you?


----------



## crebel

Didn't you find your keys THERE?


----------



## lonestar

Who's in charge of the keys?


----------



## Barbiedull

If I am in charge of the keys, and I get lost while carrying the keys, are the keys lost too?


----------



## Jeff

If you're lost, aren't we all?


----------



## Barbiedull

Jeff said:


> If you're lost, aren't we all?


I thought I only had the keys, are you coming with me?


----------



## Jeff

Aren't we all connected by this thread?


----------



## Barbiedull

Jeff said:


> Aren't we all connected by this thread?


A common thread of lost people with random questions?


----------



## Jeff

barbiedull said:


> A common thread of lost people with random questions?


Isn't that a definition of cyber-friends?


----------



## Barbiedull

Jeff said:


> Isn't that a definition of cyber-friends?





Spoiler



I think it might be!



A storm just rolled in here, did someone make Scarlet mad?


----------



## lonestar

Scarlet is the Queen, why would she be mad?


----------



## Jeff

Would Scarlet be Scarlet if she wasn't mad?


----------



## telracs

Now that I'm queen, can I order


Spoiler



off with your heads


?


----------



## Jeff

Wouldn't that be the Red Queen and not The Green Queen?


----------



## intinst

You can order it, but how will you make it happen?


----------



## telracs

intinst said:


> You can order it, but how will you make it happen?


I'm queen, don't you know I order and OTHER people make happen?



Jeff said:


> Wouldn't that be the Red Queen and not The Green Queen?


You angling for the position of White Rabbit?


----------



## intinst

scarlet said:


> I'm queen, don't you know I order and OTHER people make happen?
> 
> You angling for the position of White Rabbit?


Going to be difficult to verify that those orders are carried out, isn't it?


----------



## Jeff

scarlet said:


> You angling for the position of White Rabbit?


Am I too late?


----------



## Geoffrey

Anyone else want a cocktail while I'm up?


----------



## Jeff

Is that, 3 oz Stoli® Vanil vodka, 3 oz vanilla liqueur, 1 oz milk and ice?


----------



## lonestar

Bailey's over crushed ice?


----------



## Jeff

Well, Geoffrey?


----------



## telracs

A grasshopper?


----------



## lonestar

Grasshopper?  Like those nasty things hopping everywhere when we go outside?  Why not Baileys?


----------



## telracs

lonestar said:


> Grasshopper? Like those nasty things hopping everywhere when we go outside? Why not Baileys?


Because it's green?



Spoiler



A typical grasshopper cocktail consists of equal parts Crème de menthe, Crème de cacao and fresh cream, shaken with ice and strained into a chilled cocktail glass.


----------



## Barbiedull

I turned my back to make banana bread, and everyone is drinking in the random question thread?



Spoiler



It's a good thing I'm the keeper of the keys!


----------



## telracs

barbiedull said:


> I turned my back to make banana bread, and everyone is drinking in the random question thread?


May I have a slice of banana bread?


----------



## Jeff

How about a banana daiquiri to go with your White Rabbit?

Bartholomew the Chaste


----------



## telracs

Jeff said:


> Bartholomew the Chaste


The _Chaste_? I'm allowed to laugh, right?


----------



## Barbiedull

scarlet said:


> May I have a slice of banana bread?


Certainly Queen Scarlet! 
It's calorie free if you eat it while it's still warm, isn't it?


Spoiler



With my kids if you don't eat it while it's warm...it may be gone!


----------



## telracs

Isn't all "virtual" food calorie free?


----------



## crebel

scarlet said:


> The _Chaste_? I'm allowed to laugh, right?


We wouldn't laugh at Jeff, would we?


Spoiler



snicker, snicker, snort, snort guffaw


 We love Jeff, don't we?


----------



## Susan in VA

Jeff said:


> Is that, 3 oz Stoli® Vanil vodka, 3 oz vanilla liqueur, 1 oz milk and ice?


Doesn't that sound yummy? Isn't it a shame that I only have_ one_ of those ingredients in the house?


----------



## Jeff

Susan in VA said:


> Doesn't that sound yummy? Isn't it a shame that I only have_ one_ of those ingredients in the house?


Ice?


----------



## Susan in VA

No, milk.

What kind of vanilla liquor is that supposed to be?


----------



## Jeff

Susan in VA said:


> No, milk.
> 
> What kind of vanilla liquor is that supposed to be?


You don't have ice?

Are you going to make me confess that I Googled the ingredients for a White Rabbit?


----------



## Susan in VA

Is it so unusual that I don't need ice often enough to bother making it? 

Would you believe that whenever I fill the ice trays, they sit untouched for a year or so and get stale?  (Did you know that ice can get stale?)


If you just Googled that, does that mean you've never tried one of those?


----------



## Jeff

Have I failed to mention that I rarely drink alcoholic beverages?


----------



## Susan in VA

Does rarely mean never?


----------



## Jeff

Does one beer every other 4th of July constitute rarely or never?


----------



## Susan in VA

What do you think a nitpicky person like me is going to say, hmmm? 



Spoiler



That's "rarely", of course.



(Funny too, because for about ten years I drank ONE SIP of beer every Fourth of July, to make sure I still didn't like the taste. Still don't. Gave up on re-checking.)


----------



## Jeff

Does that mean you don't drink or you don't drink beer?


----------



## Susan in VA

I don't like the taste of beer.  Tried multiple varieties, too.    

Does it still count as "rarely" if I have a glass of wine every few months?  And some kind of cocktail about once a year?


----------



## Vegas_Asian

Caffeine anyone?


----------



## Barbiedull

Vegas_Asian said:


> Caffeine anyone?


Oh yes! Pass the coffee?


----------



## Brenda Carroll

How about that flavored creamer?


----------



## intinst

Can I be havin' a wee rum in mine?
Treacher the Burly


----------



## Valmore Daniels

Shiver me timbers, would ye pass the grog already?


----------



## Barbiedull

Valmore Daniels said:


> Shiver me timbers, would ye pass the grog already?


Doesn't the grog just make you groggy?


----------



## Jeff

Does a barb make your Barbie?


----------



## Barbiedull

Bartholomew the Chaste said:


> Does a barb make your Barbie?


I have Barbs, do I need to use them Bart?


Spoiler



Mine are Tiger Barbs.



I need more coffee. Maybe I drank the grog instead?


----------



## Jeff

Puntius anchisporus?


----------



## Barbiedull

Bartholomew the Chaste said:


> Puntius anchisporus? Yes, indeed.


----------



## Annalog

Why do I prefer ales to lagers but don't really like either type of beer? Could I drink hard cider instead?


----------



## Alle Meine Entchen

will hot chocolate work?


----------



## Annalog

Will it have those little marshmallows?


----------



## Barbiedull

Cobbie said:


> How is it that I'm gone for a day only to come back and find all these "new" members with strange names?
> 
> Welcome, everyone!


 Cobbie, did you find your pirate name?
http://www.froggynet.com/cgi-bin/pirate.cgi


----------



## Maud Muller

Would I be happier if I was a pirate instead of a writer?


----------



## caracara

Would it work if you just wrote about pirates?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

What's a pirate's favorite letter of the alphabet?



Spoiler



Arrrrrr - sorry, bad joke my kids told me


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

Can I go to another Rush concert soon?


----------



## telracs

mom133d said:


> Can I go to another Rush concert soon?


Take me with you?

Where'd you see them last?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

You'd come? Saturday night at Bristow, VA, heard of it?

Did you know they performed the entire Moving Pictures album this tour?


----------



## telracs

mom133d said:


> You'd come? Saturday night at Bristow, VA, heard of it?
> 
> Did you know they performed the entire Moving Pictures album this tour?


Are they playing anywhere on the East Coast again soon?

When are they going to release more tracks of the new CD?



Spoiler



saw them at Jones Beach in July, so yes, I know they did all of Moving Pictures


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

Spoiler



Sept 29 Atlanta then a few dates in Florida. Geddy said after the tour they were going back in the studio. That's all I know. 



Shall we become roadies?


----------



## telracs

How's the pay?


----------



## Brenda Carroll

Is it true that concert frequenters lose their hearing? Huh? What?


----------



## telracs

http://www.kboards.com/index.php/topic,36887.0.html

have you checked out my bubble pictures?


----------



## lonestar

How did you do that?


----------



## telracs

lonestar said:


> How did you do that?


ever heard of touchable bubbles?


----------



## Brenda Carroll

Did you know that fairies like bubbles?


----------



## telracs

Brendan Carroll said:


> Did you know that fairies like bubbles?


Have you tried appeasing the brownies with bubbles?


----------



## lonestar

Touchable bubbles?


----------



## telracs

Is someone at amazon wondering why they are suddenly selling all these bubbles?


----------



## Tip10

Ohhhh, does the Queen allow just anybody to TOUCH her bubbles?


----------



## telracs

Tip10 said:


> Ohhhh, does the Queen allow just anybody to TOUCH her bubbles?


Do you think the Queen let's ANYONE touch her bubbles?


----------



## Marguerite

Cobbie said:


> Got it a few days ago.
> 
> Regards,
> Linda
> 
> 
> Spoiler
> 
> 
> 
> Bitch
> 
> 
> Toe


mine is: Second Mate Chaste Beard it sounds like a boy name though even though I entered female


----------



## lonestar

scarlet said:


> Do you think the Queen let's ANYONE touch her bubbles?


How mean can she REALLY be if she likes bubbles?


----------



## Tip10

Well she takes some pretty mean pictures of bubbles doesn't she?


----------



## Barbiedull

lonestar said:


> How mean can she REALLY be if she likes bubbles?


Can those _unbreakable_ bubbles take a lot of abuse?


----------



## telracs

How close _was_ that lightning?


----------



## Barbiedull

We had quite a bit yesterday...was that you Scarlet?


----------



## telracs

Barbiedull said:


> We had quite a bit yesterday...was that you Scarlet?


hiding in the closet?


----------



## caracara

Why did it rain for 20 minutes today, right when I was driving?


----------



## Barbiedull

scarlet said:


> hiding in the closet?


There is nothing to fear..right?


----------



## Vegas_Asian

Why is YouTube so addicting. I just four hrs i should have been studying


----------



## Marguerite

why aren't my kids asleep?


----------



## lonestar

Why did I save that?


----------



## Brenda Carroll

Why am I up so early?


----------



## UltraPremiumDeluxe

Why am I wearing this bra?


----------



## Brenda Carroll

Why am_ I_ wearing a bra?



Spoiler



I'm not wearing one, but I made you wonder, didn't I?


----------



## lonestar

Why did I eat all those tacos?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

lonestar said:


> Why did I eat all those tacos?


Are there any left?


----------



## Brenda Carroll

Did you see the screaming animal commercial?



Spoiler



It's on the screaming squirrel site. Love it.


----------



## caracara

Did you know that I saw the Screaming commercial?


----------



## Brenda Carroll

How did you like the screaming animal commercial?


----------



## vwkitten

Speaking of screaming and animals... Why did I think I could handle a new puppy?


----------



## caracara

Is it because puppies are so cute?



Brendan Carroll said:


> How did you like the screaming animal commercial?


How do I answer "I enjoyed it, very amusing" in the form of a question?


----------



## terryr

Did anyone ever wonder why there are 100 seconds in a minute using microwave time and only 60 on clock time? Are they metric seconds?


----------



## telracs

Have you checked out the new additions on the photo board?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

Are you the kind of friend that you would want to have as a friend?


----------



## lonestar

Where did the day go?


----------



## Barbiedull

lonestar said:


> Where did the day go?


I took it...and I'm KEEPING it! Oh wait, it's missing...where _did_ it go?


----------



## Jeff

Is this it?


----------



## Barbiedull

Do you have it Jeff?


----------



## Jeff

What does it look like?


----------



## Barbiedull

Jeff said:


> What does it look like?


It was Lonestar's day, and it sounded really good


Spoiler



(so I was going to borrow it!)...


..did you take it?


----------



## Jeff

What if I did?


----------



## Barbiedull

I guess we can't share it... maybe Lonestar wants it back?


Spoiler



Maybe she'll pay attention and not let it get away next time?


----------



## Jeff

Do you want it now or tomorrow?


----------



## Barbiedull

Jeff said:


> Do you want it now or tomorrow?


It has to be today, or it would be tomorrow, right?


----------



## Jeff

How can it be today when it's tonight?


----------



## Barbiedull

Jeff said:


> How can it be today when it's tonight?


Doesn't "today" cover all of the day?


----------



## Jeff

Doesn't night start when the sun goes down?


----------



## Barbiedull

Jeff said:


> Doesn't night start when the sun goes down?


 Tonight is only a part of today, but today is all day.
Makes perfect sense, doesn't it?


----------



## Jeff

Are you blonde?


----------



## Geoffrey

Sun's down - who needs me to freshen up their cocktail?


----------



## Jeff

Ah-ha. My point exactly - if the sun's down, isn't the day gone forever?


----------



## Barbiedull

Jeff said:


> Are you blonde?


Of course I am, can't you see my picture?


----------



## Jeff

Isn't that Tippi Hedren?


----------



## Barbiedull

Jeff said:


> Isn't that Tippi Hedren?





Spoiler



Yes it is, but that's one of the few Barbies I actually like...


I'm not Tippi yet..but don't I seem to get blonder by the moment TONIGHT?


----------



## Jeff

Did you order a drink from Geoffrey?


----------



## Jeff

Hey. Did anyone notice that I'm Poe?


----------



## Barbiedull

Jeff said:


> Did you order a drink from Geoffrey?


No I didn't. Drinking just makes me act silly.... but you might not notice the difference?


----------



## Brenda Carroll

Are you quoting the raven nevermore?  Or are you enamored of the lovely Lenore?  Or was that some other girl?


----------



## lonestar

Geoffrey said:


> Sun's down - who needs me to freshen up their cocktail?


Got Margaritas?


----------



## Jeff

Brendan Carroll said:


> Are you quoting the raven nevermore? Or are you enamored of the lovely Lenore? Or was that some other girl?


Not yet, I celebrating not being Pooh. Where's Geoffrey with those cocktails?


----------



## Barbiedull

lonestar said:


> Got Margaritas?


Now you're talking...! I'm in if you are?


----------



## Barbiedull

Jeff said:


> Not yet, I celebrating not being Pooh. Where's Geoffrey with those cocktails?


Much better to be Poe than Pooh! Isn't Geoffrey the Giraffe at ToysRUs? Geoffrey, do you know Pooh?


----------



## Jeff

Isn't it illegal for a giraffe to serve cocktails?


----------



## Barbiedull

Jeff said:


> Isn't it illegal for a giraffe to serve cocktails?


Is he over 21?


----------



## caracara

Dont you only hae to be 18 to serve beverages though?


----------



## Jeff

Don't you have to be human?


----------



## Barbiedull

caracara said:


> Dont you only hae to be 18 to serve beverages though?


 It probably depends on the drinking age in the state you're in?


----------



## Barbiedull

Jeff said:


> Don't you have to be human?


Is that a law?


----------



## Jeff

Wouldn't an opposing thumb be an unstated requirement to serve drinks?


----------



## Barbiedull

Jeff said:


> Wouldn't an opposing thumb be an unstated requirement to serve drinks?


It does make things easier, doesn't it?

I keep getting the Kindleboards.com live feed when I try to post...


----------



## lonestar

chilled Patron anyone?


----------



## Jeff

Barbiedull said:


> I keep getting the Kindleboards.com live feed when I try to post...


How much have you had to drink?


Spoiler



Harvey's working on it.


----------



## Barbiedull

lonestar said:


> chilled Patron anyone?


A straight Tequila night?


----------



## Barbiedull

Jeff said:


> How much have you had to drink?
> 
> 
> Spoiler
> 
> 
> 
> Harvey's working on it.


Nothing yet!
I think I'll grab my Kindle and read before Lonestar corrupts me... 
What happened to the giraffe? I mean Geoffrey...


----------



## lonestar

Barbiedull said:


> Nothing yet!
> I think I'll grab my Kindle and read before Lonestar corrupts me...
> What happened to the giraffe? I mean Geoffrey...


party pooper?


----------



## Barbiedull

lonestar said:


> party pooper?





Spoiler



Tequila turns me into Minnie Pearl...and I don't have a hat with a price tag on it.


I thought blondes have more fun...?


----------



## Jeff

Have you seen the Kindleboards live feed?

http://www.kboards.com/live/


----------



## Brenda Carroll

Giraffe? Can I haz it?


----------



## Jeff

Cobbie said:


> Cool! Do I need a new IE tab?
> 
> And how do I read who's online with the constant refreshes?


Have you left a comment about the for Harvey in the suggestion thread?


----------



## telracs

Did you know that I got an invite to Geoffrey the Giraffe's birthday party?


----------



## telracs

Why do people insist that you allow them their opinion, then tell you your opinion is not allowed?


----------



## Jeff

Are some people too opinionated?


----------



## Barbiedull

scarlet said:


> Did you know that I got an invite to Geoffrey the Giraffe's birthday party?


Did you go? Or, are you going?


----------



## Jeff

Is that a question or your opinion?


----------



## Jeff

Shall we ask Scarlet's opinion?


----------



## Jeff

Scarlet, will you please cover your eyes?


----------



## telracs

how can i type with my hands over my eyes?


----------



## Jeff

Wasn't that the point?


----------



## lonestar

Hasn't it been a beautiful day?


----------



## telracs

You don't want me to type?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

Why can't you see yourself in the mirror with your eyes closed?


----------



## lonestar

What the heck is Error 4?


----------



## Jeff

Isn't error 4 the one before error 5?


----------



## Brenda Carroll

How do you know the mirror is still there when you close your eyes?


----------



## lonestar

There's a mirror?


----------



## Barbiedull

Jeff is an author too? How did I miss that? 


Spoiler



I closed my eyes to look in the mirror, and books appeared in your signature line...
like magic!


----------



## Jeff

Did you miss all of BTackitt's nagging?


----------



## Barbiedull

Jeff said:


> Did you miss all of BTackitt's nagging?


 I must have missed it.


----------



## lonestar

Did you know they don't sell Shiner beer or make Chicken Fried Steak at Logan's in Meridian, Mississippi?


----------



## telracs

lonestar said:


> Did you know they don't sell Shiner beer or make Chicken Fried Steak at Logan's in Meridian, Mississippi?


Why would they?


----------



## Jeff

lonestar said:


> Did you know they don't sell Shiner beer or make Chicken Fried Steak at Logan's in Meridian, Mississippi?


Did you know that Shiner Bock is distributed in 41 states?


----------



## telracs

Jeff said:


> Did you know that Shiner Bock is distributed in 41 states?


Including NY?


----------



## lonestar

scarlet said:


> Why would they?


Okay, I know you're the Queen and all but what?


----------



## telracs

lonestar said:


> Okay, I know you're the Queen and all but what?


Okay, why wouldn't they?


----------



## Jeff

scarlet said:


> Okay, why wouldn't they?


Have you ever been to Shiner, Texas?


----------



## Jeff

Have you been to Shiner in the spring when the bluebonnets are in bloom?


----------



## Jeff

How do I say "yes" in the form of a question?


----------



## lonestar

I was counting on you.  Don't you know?


----------



## Jeff

lonestar said:


> I was counting on you. Don't you know?


Me?


----------



## Susan in VA

Hi everybody, have you missed me?


Spoiler



Don't answer that if the answer is no.



Did you know that not being online for four days means there are WAY too many posts to ever catch up on, so I'm focusing on the most essential threads? Didn't you realize this is one of them? 

Jeff, when did you come out of the closet?


Spoiler



Nice covers.


----------



## Jeff

Did I miss you? Are you crazy?


----------



## Jeff

Susan in VA said:


> Jeff, when did you come out of the closet?


Didn't you notice BTackitt's campaign?


----------



## telracs

Jeff said:


> Are you crazy?


Aren't we all?


----------



## Susan in VA

Jeff said:


> Did I miss you? Are you crazy?


Do you really expect me to answer that?


----------



## Susan in VA

Jeff said:


> Didn't you notice BTackitt's campaign?


After being offline since last Friday, I just got back online ten minutes ago, so how could I have seen that already?


----------



## Jeff

Susan in VA said:


> After being offline since last Friday, I just got back online ten minutes ago, so how could I have seen that already?


Do you remember BTackitt's dare threads?


----------



## Jeff

Where has Susan been since Friday?


----------



## Susan in VA

Jeff said:


> Do you remember BTackitt's dare threads?


Sure, but did those have anything to do with book covers??


----------



## Susan in VA

Jeff said:


> Where has Susan been since Friday?


Would you believe at home? (Just not online.)


----------



## Jeff

Susan in VA said:


> Sure, but did those have anything to do with book covers??


Why else would I have mentioned it?


----------



## Susan in VA

Jeff said:


> Why else would I have mentioned it?


Because you like sending people off on wild goose chases?


----------



## Jeff

Have I become so transparent?


----------



## bobavey

Why do we ask -- how are you? -- when greeting someone?


----------



## Tip10

Why do most folks who ask "How are you?" never listen to the answer?


----------



## Brenda Carroll

Is it annoying when you ask "What?" and the questionee answers "Huh?"?


----------



## Tip10

Has anybody else ever heard the line my Mom used to lay on us when we said Huh?
"Pig says Huh? pull its tail and it'll say Uh-Huh?"


----------



## lonestar

Don't pigs say Oink?


----------



## Tip10

It depends I guess, did you pull their tails?


----------



## Susan in VA

If you did, would they go straight and then go back to curly with a_ boinggg_ sound?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

Is it time to start a Rocky Horror Picture Show thread?


----------



## lonestar

Susan in VA said:


> If you did, would they go straight and then go back to curly with a_ boinggg_ sound?


Are you going to try it?


----------



## Susan in VA

lonestar said:


> Are you going to try it?


Where would I find a pig in Northern Virginia?


Spoiler



(I know, I know, I've had bosses like that too.....)


----------



## Jeff

What are you doing here so early - and why are you looking for pigs?


----------



## Susan in VA

Didn't you see lonestar's suggestion?

And do you think being on KB early might help cheer me up after a "downer" day?


----------



## Brenda Carroll

Are pigs hard to find in Northern Virginia?


----------



## Jeff

Susan in VA said:


> Didn't you see lonestar's suggestion?
> 
> And do you think being on KB early might help cheer me up after a "downer" day?


Yes, I saw it - didn't my question cheer you up?


----------



## Susan in VA

Brendan Carroll said:


> Are pigs hard to find in Northern Virginia?


Have you been to the DC suburbs lately?


----------



## Susan in VA

Jeff said:


> Yes, I saw it - didn't my question cheer you up?


Don't your posts always cheer me up?


----------



## Jeff

Haven't you noticed that some people find my cheer-leading uncalled-for?


----------



## Susan in VA

Really?  Maybe you should use pompoms and jump up and down?


----------



## Jeff

What outcome do you prefer? My having a coronary or getting arrested?


----------



## Susan in VA

Okay, Jeff in a jail cell, with pompoms  .... or Jeff in hospital  .... what do _you_ think?


----------



## Barbiedull

Better to be arrested than have a coronary...
What color are your pompoms?


----------



## Jeff

Barbiedull said:


> What color are your pompoms?


This is Susan's nightmare, have you asked her?


----------



## Susan in VA

Didn't _you_ complain that people weren't appreciating your cheerleading?


Spoiler



I was only trying to help...


----------



## Barbiedull

Jeff said:


> This is Susan's nightmare, have you asked her?


 Hasn't it turned into your nightmare?


----------



## Jeff

Did I just dream it?


----------



## Barbiedull

Maybe it's a _recurring_ nightmare?


----------



## Jeff

How do I get rid of it?


----------



## lonestar

Should you count pigs?


----------



## Jeff

How many pigs does it take to screw in a light bulb?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

Susan in VA said:


> Have you been to the DC suburbs lately?


How far does that extend these days?


----------



## Tip10

Jeff said:


> How many pigs does it take to screw in a light bulb?


Is it still called Makin' Bacon if its in a light bulb?


----------



## Jeff

Is that a family friendly question?


----------



## Monica of NY

After having read all 99 pages of this thread, my question: Kindleboards, have I told you lately that I love you?


----------



## Barbiedull

Jeff said:


> How do I get rid of it?


 Stay awake?

My dog had surgery and her medication says "talk to your veterinarian if your pet experiences headache, dizziness...". How do I get my dog to tell me if she has a headache or dizziness?


----------



## bobavey

Why are we doing this?


----------



## Jeff

What are we doing?


----------



## Barbiedull

bobavey said:


> Why are we doing this?


What _is_ this?


----------



## Jeff

Huh?


----------



## Barbiedull

Jeff said:


> Huh?


 Shouldn't you know WHAT you are doing to find out WHY you are doing it?


----------



## Jeff

Do you think that's a fair question?


----------



## Barbiedull

Jeff said:


> Do you think that's a fair question?


I think it's fair, don't you?


Spoiler



Can't say I always know what I'm doing though...!


----------



## Jeff

Aren't fair and blonde quite similar?


----------



## telracs

Jeff said:


> What are we doing?


Contemplating the beauty of the Universe?


----------



## Barbiedull

Jeff said:


> Aren't fair and blonde quite similar?


Is it unfair to be brunette?


----------



## Tip10

Is blonde a state or state of mind?


----------



## Ann in Arlington

Haven't you people gotten tired of this yet?


----------



## Barbiedull

Tip10 said:


> Is blonde a state or state of mind?


Both?


----------



## Barbiedull

Ann in Arlington said:


> Haven't you people gotten tired of this yet?


 How could we?


----------



## telracs

Ann in Arlington said:


> Haven't you people gotten tired of this yet?


Did you really think we would?

How long have we been doing this anyway?


----------



## Brenda Carroll

Didn't you know that we didn't start the fire?


----------



## Jeff

Isn't playing with fire dangerous?


----------



## telracs

Brendan Carroll said:


> Didn't you know that we didn't start the fire?


Did Billy Joel?


----------



## Jeff

scarlet said:


> Did Billy Joel?


Wasn't it The Doors?


----------



## telracs

Jeff said:


> Wasn't it The Doors?


Didn't the Doors want their fire lit?


----------



## Tip10

scarlet said:


> Didn't the Doors want their fire lit?


Wasn't it on Charlie's Mountain?


----------



## Barbiedull

Tip10 said:


> Wasn't it on Charlie's Mountain?


Did Charlie know they wanted to set fire to his mountain?


----------



## Jeff

Charlie who?


----------



## Barbiedull

Jeff said:


> Charlie who?


Was it Charlie and the Chocolate Factory?


----------



## telracs

Charlie Daniels?


----------



## lonestar

What about Charlie Brown?


----------



## Jeff

What do you do for a charlie-horse?


----------



## Barbiedull

Jeff said:


> What do you do for a charlie-horse?


Isn't that why the make horse liniment? To rub on the Charlie-horse?


----------



## Jeff

Where do you apply the horse liniment to start your fire?


----------



## Barbiedull

Jeff said:


> Where do you apply the horse liniment to start your fire?


Is that a trick question?


----------



## Tip10

Jeff said:


> Where do you apply the horse liniment to start your fire?





Spoiler



Don't you rub it --censored--censored--censored--censored -- ?



The above has been censored because isn't this a family board?


----------



## Barbiedull

Tip10 said:


> Spoiler
> 
> 
> 
> Don't you rub it --censored--censored--censored--censored -- ?
> 
> 
> 
> The above has been censored because isn't this a family board?





Spoiler



That is why I wasn't going there with that question!


----------



## crebel

Where shall we go instead?


----------



## telracs

Back to the future?


----------



## telracs

Cobbie said:


> How is it that I'm gone for a couple of days only to come back and find the kids playing with fire?


where you been?

and did you bring marshmallows?


----------



## telracs

When is the wedding?


----------



## telracs

Dress all ready?


----------



## lonestar

Can we all come?


----------



## telracs

Does anyone else find the use of "cobbie" and "bling" in the same sentence amusing?


----------



## telracs

how'd we get to 101 pages?  

and when are we gonna see bling pictures?


----------



## Barbiedull

scarlet said:


> and when are we gonna see bling pictures?


Can I second Queen Scarlet's request?


----------



## Jeff

I know who Cobbie is, but who's Bling?


----------



## Jeff

I remember you, of course, but where did I meet Bling?


----------



## Barbiedull

Jeff said:


> I know who Cobbie is, but who's Bling?


 Cobbie is keeping Bling a secret... 
Does it sound like she spends a lot of money on him??


----------



## Jeff

Cobbie?


----------



## telracs

didn't you say a friend was coming over to help you pick out bling?


Spoiler



yes you did



don't you own a camera (or a least a phone with a camera)?


Spoiler



yes you do



so, why can't you take pictures and post them?


----------



## Brenda Carroll

Did you say Cobbie be gettin' her bling on?


----------



## lonestar

So now we have a Bling party AND a Birthday party too?


----------



## Barbiedull

lonestar said:


> So now we have a Bling party AND a Birthday party too?


And a wedding...?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

How come lasagna tastes to much better than spaghetti?


----------



## caracara

Is it because lasagna has more cheese? Or because it is easier to eat?


----------



## Susan in VA

But can you have pesto lasagna?


----------



## loonlover

Who says lasagna tastes better than spaghetti?


----------



## Barbiedull

loonlover said:


> Who says lasagna tastes better than spaghetti?


Why does pizza taste better than lasagna?


----------



## Jeff

Would they taste the same if you ate lasagna with your fingers?


----------



## Barbiedull

Jeff said:


> Would they taste the same if you ate lasagna with your fingers?


No, not to me, how about you?


----------



## Barbiedull

Cobbie said:


> Would you wear more than you would eat if lasagna were a finger food?


 Can I blame it on the birds circling my head? 


Spoiler



Cold lasagna holds together well...


----------



## Jeff

Didn't you know that birds are finger lickin' good?


----------



## lonestar

Is it okay to start the party now?


----------



## Barbiedull

Jeff said:


> Didn't you know that birds are finger lickin' good?


Are they trying to lick my fingers? Maybe I should wash my hands after I eat that cold lasagna?


----------



## Annalog

Barbiedull said:


> Are they trying to lick my fingers? Maybe I should wash my hands after I eat that cold lasagna?


Did you remember to wash your hands before eating the cold lasagna with your fingers?


----------



## Barbiedull

Annalog said:


> Did you remember to wash your hands before eating the cold lasagna with your fingers?





Spoiler



ALWAYS!


----------



## telracs

lonestar said:


> Is it okay to start the party now?


aren't we always partying?


----------



## Susan in VA

Is it a sign that the party's good if nobody has posted for ten hours?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

Do you think they thought they posted?


----------



## Susan in VA

Would that mean that everyone at the party is a little.... _happier _than they should be?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

Do you think we should call for help?


----------



## telracs

is the party STILL going on?

sorry, it's been a busy day, i apparently got kidnapped.


----------



## Jeff

Did I miss the party?


----------



## Jeff

Didn't you invite us all to your party?


----------



## crebel

Are we celebrating Scarlet's successful rescue?


----------



## Jeff

Is _that_ something that should be celebrated?


----------



## crebel

Don't YOU think it should be?


----------



## Jeff

You mean you didn't enjoy the moment of silence?


----------



## crebel

Was there silence?  Didn't you hear and enjoy Broadway tunes?


----------



## Jeff

I didn't hear any meanness - did I miss hearing something?


----------



## crebel

Did I lose a post? I thought I replied that I hear Scarlet sings a _mean_ showtune, does that count?


----------



## Jeff

See what I miss when I'm off line for a few hours?


----------



## telracs

why do I start singing "rockin' Robin" whenever people say the word tweet?


----------



## Jeff

You couldn't think of anything meaner than reminding us all of _Rockin' Robin_?


----------



## telracs

How about blowing up some penguins?


----------



## Jeff

Didn't you already mention running over penguins with your car?


----------



## telracs

Jeff said:


> Didn't you already mention running over penguins with your car?


You mean my sign post?



Spoiler



And no, I didn't run over the cute little blue penguins. Nor did our bus driver.


----------



## Geoffrey

what about the ugly ones?


----------



## Barbiedull

scarlet said:


> How about blowing up some penguins?


I thought you said they flew away? 
I turned my back to bake a chocolate cake, and you're blowing up penguins?


----------



## Jeff

Can ugly penguins fly?


----------



## Barbiedull

Jeff said:


> Can ugly penguins fly?


Why wouldn't they be able to?


----------



## Brenda Carroll

Why are we hating on penguins?


----------



## Barbiedull

Brendan Carroll said:


> Why are we hating on penguins?


I like penguins. I think it's from this thread unless I missed something?
http://www.kboards.com/index.php/topic,38483.50/topicseen.html


----------



## lonestar

Do any penguins fly?


----------



## Susan in VA

No, but have you seen film footage of them swimming?  Don't you think the motion looks more like flying than like swimming?


----------



## caracara

Do I agree that they look more like they are flying than swimming?


Spoiler



Yes i do!


----------



## bobavey

Why are alligators able to run so fast on land? I think I heard on some TV program that they can reach speeds of 35 miles per hour. That's not a comforting thought.


----------



## Valmore Daniels

Did you know some penguins can jump 6 feet in the air?


----------



## Tip10

How high do you think a penguin would jump when being chased by an alligator?


----------



## Jeff

Would a penguin being chased by an alligator jump as high as a penguin being chased by Scarlet?


----------



## telracs

Tip10 said:


> How high do you think a penguin would jump when being chased by an alligator?





Jeff said:


> Would a penguin being chased by an alligator jump as high as a penguin being chased by Scarlet?


Is this a question for Mythbusters?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

scarlet said:


> Is this a question for Mythbusters?


Isn't everything?


----------



## Tip10

Why would Scarlet chase a penguin?
Was she being chased by an alligator?

Hmmm, do penguins live in NY sewers with the alligators?


----------



## Jeff

Tip10 said:


> Why would Scarlet chase a penguin?





scarlet said:


> How about blowing up some penguins?


----------



## Tip10

Jeff said:


> Tip10 said:
> 
> 
> 
> Why would Scarlet chase a penguin?
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> scarlet said:
> 
> 
> 
> How about blowing up some penguins?
> 
> Click to expand...
Click to expand...

You think maybe she was trying to get rid of the alligators?


----------



## Barbiedull

Would Scarlet chase an alligator if it took her chocolates?


----------



## telracs

Do alligators like chocolate?


----------



## Tip10

Alligators have green meat, Scarlet is green, is there a connection?


----------



## Barbiedull

scarlet said:


> Do alligators like chocolate?


Do they have fish-flavored Godiva?


----------



## Brenda Carroll

When do we start subtracting years on our birthday?


----------



## Jeff

Did you see my happy birthday message?


----------



## telracs

Maybe I was just kidding about blowing them up?  Anybody think I'd really be mean enough to blow up penguins?


----------



## Jeff

scarlet said:


> Anybody think I'd really be mean enough to blow up penguins?


Are you kidding?


----------



## Barbiedull

scarlet said:


> Anybody think I'd really be mean enough to blow up penguins?


Of course not Scarlet. Would you blow up an alligator?


----------



## lonestar

Is Scarlet trying to be nice?


----------



## telracs

Barbiedull said:


> Of course not Scarlet. Would you blow up an alligator?


Is it the one who stole my chocolate?



lonestar said:


> Is Scarlet trying to be nice?


Could it be that I was trying to rescue Gordon?


----------



## Brenda Carroll

Jeff said:


> Did you see my happy birthday message?


Was it the one with the exploding penguins?


----------



## Jeff

So you didn't see either? Should I post a 3rd?


----------



## telracs

Why do I try and make sense of the things asked here?


----------



## Barbiedull

scarlet said:


> Is it the one who stole my chocolate?


 Yes, it was.... but he dropped them. No need to blow him up anymore?


----------



## Susan in VA

So let me see if I have this straight.  Penguins like chocolate, scarlet can't fly, and Brendan got an alligator for his birthday  --  did I get that right?


----------



## caracara

No no I think its Penguins like chocolate, Scarlet blew up, and the alligator ate Jeff's birthday message, right?


----------



## Brenda Carroll

Did you try to dry over the alligator, Jeff?


----------



## Jeff

Have you been celebrating a bit too much, Brendan?


----------



## Brenda Carroll

How do you spell Cap'n Morgan's Tattoo?


----------



## telracs

Brendan Carroll said:


> How do you spell Cap'n Morgan's Tattoo?


Don't you know you shouldn't get a tattoo while drunk?


----------



## caracara

Don't you only know that wen your sober?


----------



## lonestar

If the alligator likes chocolate, can he really be that bad?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

Ever see an alligator on a sugar rush?


----------



## caracara

Can it be any worse than Scarlet after her stolen chocolate?


----------



## telracs

caracara said:


> Can it be any worse than Scarlet after her stolen chocolate?


why are there so many random questions about me?


----------



## caracara

Could it have something to do with you being the Queen and us not wanting to offend you by appearing to forget about you?


----------



## lonestar

Why is there braille at the drive through window?


----------



## Barbiedull

scarlet said:


> why are there so many random questions about me?


Scarlet, is that a new alligator purse you have?


----------



## Susan in VA

Does anyone really like alligator purses?  

Does anyone know whether vintage ones are worth anything?

(I inherited two that I keep meaning to put on EBay.)


----------



## Barbiedull

Susan in VA said:


> Does anyone really like alligator purses?
> 
> Does anyone know whether vintage ones are worth anything?
> 
> (I inherited two that I keep meaning to put on EBay.)


They still sell on Ebay. You could check bidding on one that looks like yours.


----------



## Susan in VA

Do you suppose I should avoid mentioning in the listing that personally I think they're hideous?


----------



## Barbiedull

Susan in VA said:


> Do you suppose I should avoid mentioning in the listing that personally I think they're hideous?


It's probably best _not_ to mention?


Spoiler



Are they the ones with head and feet?


----------



## Susan in VA

Barbiedull said:


> It's probably best _not_ to mention?
> 
> 
> Spoiler
> 
> 
> 
> Are they the ones with head and feet?


Ick, no. They're just ugly. But maybe somebody likes that kind of thing?


----------



## telracs

Barbiedull said:


> Scarlet, is that a new alligator purse you have?


Do you think I would hurt an alligator just for a purse?


----------



## Barbiedull

Susan in VA said:


> Ick, no. They're just ugly. But maybe somebody likes that kind of thing?


Someone does. Have you seen the Chanel Alligator bags on Ebay?


----------



## Barbiedull

scarlet said:


> Do you think I would hurt an alligator just for a purse?


Of course not Scarlet. Maybe it was the chocolate that did him in...?


----------



## Jeff

Wait, I'm confused - who stole the alligator's purse?


----------



## Barbiedull

Jeff said:


> Wait, I'm confused - who stole the alligator's purse?


Why don't you ask the lady with the alligator purse?


----------



## lonestar

Was there any money in the alligator's purse?


----------



## telracs

are alligators allergic to chocolate?


----------



## Barbiedull

scarlet said:


> are alligators allergic to chocolate?





Spoiler



Seems he wasn't dead...he had an allergic reaction to the chocolate.
He's on the move again so he doesn't end up on Ebay. (Not even for Chanel!)


 Scarlet, can you hide the chocolates now?


----------



## telracs

Barbiedull said:


> Scarlet, can you hide the chocolates now?


May I eat them instead?


----------



## Tip10

scarlet said:


> May I eat them instead?


Shhhh, you don't want to give away your hiding place for them do you?


----------



## Barbiedull

scarlet said:


> May I eat them instead?


Why didn't I think of that? 
Does anyone else need a choccie?


----------



## Brenda Carroll

Are the alligator bags on the shopping chanel?


----------



## caracara

Is it the one next to the food channel?


----------



## Jeff

Isn't it on PBS, just after Big Cat Diaries?


Spoiler



(Or as my five-year-old grandson says: Big Cat Diarrhea is my favorite TV show.)


----------



## lonestar

May I have a choccie please?


----------



## Barbiedull

lonestar said:


> May I have a choccie please?


----------



## Susan in VA

Is that Philip of Macedonia on the left??


----------



## Barbiedull

Susan in VA said:


> Is that Philip of Macedonia on the left??


 Did he have brown eyes?


----------



## Susan in VA

Weren't they red?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

Did you know that the temperature of an alligator's nest determines whether the baby alligators will be male or female?



Spoiler



If the nest is below 30 degrees Celsius (86 F) all the babies will be female; above 34 degrees Celsius (93 F) all are the babies will be male. Nests at temperatures in between will produce both male and female alligators. http://www.strange-facts.info/interesting-facts-about-crocodiles


----------



## Jeff

At what temperature do they become boots?


----------



## Barbiedull

Jeff said:


> At what temperature do they become boots?


Jeff, how do you send an alligator to boot-camp?


----------



## Jeff

Shouldn't you ask Sgt Tony Lama, the Drill Instructor?


----------



## Barbiedull

Jeff said:


> Shouldn't you ask Sgt Tony Lama, the Drill Instructor?


They sent Llamas to boot camp? Do you think they'll get along with alligators?


----------



## telracs

Ma'am, have you been drinking today?


----------



## Barbiedull

scarlet said:


> Ma'am, have you been drinking today?


No, I haven't. Did you notice Jeff wants to send alligators and llamas to boot camp?
Isn't that strange?


----------



## telracs

Barbiedull said:


> No, I haven't. Did you notice Jeff wants to send alligators and llamas to boot camp?
> Isn't that strange?


What's your definition of strange?


----------



## Barbiedull

scarlet said:


> What's your definition of strange?


I am strange, but isn't animals in boot camp a bit much?

Doe anyone have a new random question?


----------



## telracs

have you noticed that our questions have become less random and more strange?


----------



## Barbiedull

scarlet said:


> have you noticed that our questions have become less random and more strange?


Randomly strange or strangely random? Can I blame it on Jeff?



Spoiler



This keeps me out of the accessories thread and the "you need this bag" thread!


----------



## lonestar

Does anyone know the Thriller dance?


----------



## Tip10

We have oranges, so why aren't lemons called yellows and limes called greens?


----------



## lonestar

Tip10 said:


> We have oranges, so why aren't lemons called yellows and limes called greens?


Yeah, why is that?


----------



## Barbiedull

Tip10 said:


> We have oranges, so why aren't lemons called yellows and limes called greens?


Maybe they got tired of naming the fruit and said "the heck with it, I'm eating this orange thing"?


----------



## telracs

Because there are a bunch of different yellows and greens but only one orange?


----------



## Jeff

Who would want to ride in a lemon cab?


----------



## telracs

Jeff said:


> Who would want to ride in a lemon cab?


Or a banana submarine?


----------



## NogDog

Jeff said:


> Who would want to ride in a lemon cab?





scarlet said:


> Or a banana submarine?


They both sound interesting -- or at least appetizing -- to me.


----------



## lonestar

Why am I suddenly hungry?


----------



## telracs

NogDog said:


> They both sound interesting -- or at least appetizing -- to me.


NogDog, have you forgotten that on this thread, everything must be in the form of a question?

And how's noggin doing?


----------



## Jeff

Are you the question police?


----------



## NogDog

How do you know I was not typing with a rising inflection?

Did you know that I cannot tell you that Noggin is about the same, since that would not be asking a question?


----------



## telracs

Cobbie said:


> Nog, isn't that about as good a 'gotcha" as ever?


Gotcha?



Jeff said:


> Are you the question police?


Isn't that part of the job description of the queen of mean?


----------



## telracs

how'd the trip to N-M go?


----------



## telracs

don't you know you should _never_ say never?​


----------



## telracs

Why don't some text effects work on my Mac?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

Does the shadow effect work on a mac?



Spoiler



It doesn't work for me on IE8


----------



## telracs

Valmore Daniels said:


> Does the shadow effect work on a mac?
> 
> 
> 
> Spoiler
> 
> 
> 
> It doesn't work for me on IE8


Why doesn't the shadow effect show on this computer either?


----------



## Susan in VA

What's a shadow effect?


----------



## Jeff

Does this have a red shadow to the left of the text?



Code:


Does this have a red shadow to the left of the text?


----------



## Susan in VA

Jeff said:


> Does this have a red shadow to the left of the text?
> 
> 
> 
> Code:
> 
> 
> Does this have a red shadow to the left of the text?


Is it supposed to? 


Spoiler



It just says "shadow=red, left" with brackets and other stuff, but I'm not seeing any effects.


----------



## Jeff

If you can't see it, doesn't that mean it won't work on your computer?


----------



## Susan in VA

But why wouldn't it?


----------



## Jeff

Bad joo-joo?


----------



## Barbiedull

Jeff said:


> Bad joo-joo?


Did someone call me?

Is it a slow day on Kindleboards?


----------



## telracs

Can you tell who'll stop the rain?


----------



## lonestar

John Fogerty?


----------



## Jeff

Creedence Clearwater Revival?


----------



## Susan in VA

Native American Rain Dancers?


----------



## Jeff

Don't Native American Rain Dancers dance for rain?


----------



## Susan in VA

Wouldn't they have a different dance to make it stop?

If not, _shouldn't _they?


----------



## Jeff

I'm not going to tell them - are you?


----------



## Susan in VA

Will it keep raining until somebody does?


----------



## telracs

If you rehearse a rain dance and it doesn't rain, how do you know what you're doing wrong.


----------



## Jeff

Has it occurred to anyone that we may be all wet?


----------



## Tip10

If you do a rain dance in the rain does it rain harder?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

Does the rain in Spain really fall mainly in the plain?


----------



## lonestar

Is it raining in Spain?


----------



## Jeff

Isn't it mainly on the plain?


----------



## Tip10

Or down on the bayou sittin' on the dock of the bay?


----------



## Jeff

Or could it be raining in your heart?


----------



## Tip10

Or are raindrops falling on your head?


----------



## crebel

Do you see sunshine on a cloudy day?


----------



## Jeff

Is somebody singing in the rain?


----------



## Tip10

Or are they just Laughing at the Clouds?


----------



## telracs

Walking on sunshine?


----------



## Tip10

Are you higher than a kite can fly?


----------



## Jeff

Anyone somewhere over the rainbow?


----------



## Tip10

Being followed by a moon shadow?


----------



## telracs

During the year of the Cat?


----------



## Jeff

Is it good to be out of the rain on a horse with no name?


----------



## lonestar

Where have all the flowers gone?


----------



## Jeff

Where have all the soldiers gone?


----------



## telracs

did you skip a couple of verses?


----------



## Jeff

Did you expect me to miss the promotional opportunity?


----------



## telracs

How could I have missed the connection?


----------



## Susan in VA

Does that mean we need to move this thread to the Book Bazaar?


----------



## Barbiedull

Susan in VA said:


> Does that mean we need to move this thread to the Book Bazaar?


Aren't we already bizarre?


----------



## Jeff

Is there an echo in here?


----------



## lonestar

Is there an echo in here?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

In here, is there an echo?


----------



## crebel

What do you call a country where all the vehicles are pink?



Spoiler



a pink car-nation


----------



## telracs

How can we search for signs of intelligent life on other planets when we can't be sure if there's intelligent life on this one?


----------



## Tip10

Hey, do I resemble that remark?


----------



## Brenda Carroll

No, but am I dissembling?


----------



## Barbiedull

Cobbie said:


> You talkin' to me? You talkin' to me? You talkin' to _me_?


Birds of a Feather?


Spoiler



All singing "Rockin' Robin"...?


----------



## Annalog

Tweet? Tweet? Tweet?


----------



## Susan in VA

Speaking of tweets, does anyone here understand the useful point of Twitter?    Can you explain it to me?


----------



## Lynn McNamee

Why do fools fall in love?


----------



## telracs

Why do birds sing so gay?


----------



## Barbiedull

scarlet said:


> Why do birds sing so gay?


Is it because they enjoy broadway musicals?


Spoiler



Or they see I am covered in bird seed?


----------



## Tip10

Doesn't everybody with taste enjoy Broadway Musicals?


----------



## Barbiedull

Tip10 said:


> Doesn't everybody with taste enjoy Broadway Musicals?


Am I tasteless?


----------



## NogDog

Why do I wake up at 5:00am when I don't have to be up early and the sun doesn't rise until after 7:00am now?


----------



## Susan in VA

NogDog said:


> Why do I wake up at 5:00am when I don't have to be up early and the sun doesn't rise until after 7:00am now?


Does it have something to do with the rising inflection?


----------



## Brenda Carroll

Barbiedull said:


> Am I tasteless?


Do you have any cinnamon sugar?


----------



## Jeff

Do we need a fresh start?


----------



## Susan in VA

What, after only 109 pages??


----------



## Jeff

Didn't you think that the last few pages were getting repetitive?


----------



## Barbiedull

Brendan Carroll said:


> Do you have any cinnamon sugar?


I have Saigon Cinnamon....do I need to add sugar?


----------



## lonestar

What is Saigon Cinnamon?


----------



## Barbiedull

lonestar said:


> What is Saigon Cinnamon?





Spoiler



It's Vietnamese Cinnamon. I really like it. They sell it at Costco.


Do you like cinnamon Lonestar?


----------



## Barbiedull

Jeff said:


> Do we need a fresh start?


Would that require a stale end? Or..are we there?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

Am I the only one in the mood for horror movies in October?


----------



## Jeff

Do they bottle cinnamon Lonestar in long-necks?


----------



## Barbiedull

Jeff said:


> Do they bottle cinnamon Lonestar in long-necks?


That sounds like a seasonal beer. Maybe they could mix it with pumpkin ale?


----------



## Jeff

But can you put a bottle of pumpkin ale in the hip pocket of your Wranglers?


----------



## Barbiedull

Jeff said:


> But can you put a bottle of pumpkin ale in the hip pocket of your Wranglers?


Wouldn't it be hard to sit down?


----------



## Jeff

Barbiedull said:


> Wouldn't it be hard to sit down?


Who sits down in a honky-tonk?


----------



## lonestar

Can we have all of the above?



Barbiedull said:


> Spoiler
> 
> 
> 
> It's Vietnamese Cinnamon. I really like it. They sell it at Costco.
> 
> 
> Do you like cinnamon Lonestar?





Spoiler



yes, I like cinnamon- on toast, in oatmeal, coffee on and on.


----------



## Barbiedull

Jeff said:


> Who sits down in a honky-tonk?


I didn't know we were going to the honky-tonk?


Spoiler



I've been told I have a long neck, but I was never asked to put in in my pocket...


----------



## Tip10

Are men allowed in or is it only for Honky-Tonk Women?


----------



## Barbiedull

Tip10 said:


> Are men allowed in or is it only for Honky-Tonk Women?


Would that gimme, gimme, gimme the Honky Tonk Blues?


Spoiler



We can't leave out Jeff. It was his idea!


----------



## telracs

Do you want to dance and hold my hand?


----------



## Susan in VA

Will you promise not to get green paint on my hand?


----------



## Barbiedull

Susan in VA said:


> Will you promise not to get green paint on my hand?


Are you implying that Scarlet is a painted


Spoiler



green


 lady?


----------



## telracs

That's better than being a scarlet lady, isn't it?

Like my new avatar?


----------



## Barbiedull

scarlet said:


> That's better than being a scarlet lady, isn't it?
> 
> Like my new avatar?


Isn't a scarlet woman the same as a painted lady?

Yes, I noticed your new avatar...very nice.


----------



## telracs

Isn't a scarlet woman one step worse than a painted woman?


----------



## lonestar

So, are the men coming with the Honky Tonk women or not?


----------



## Barbiedull

scarlet said:


> Isn't a scarlet woman one step worse than a painted woman?


 It sounds very similiar to me?


Spoiler



http://thesaurus.com/browse/scarlet+woman


----------



## Barbiedull

lonestar said:


> So, are the men coming with the Honky Tonk women or not?


I sure hope so...aren't they buying the drinks?


----------



## Jeff

Can you do the Texas two-step?


----------



## telracs

Can't Texans count higher than 2?


----------



## Jeff

Let me guess. You didn't want me to buy you a drink?


----------



## telracs

Do I look like the kind of girl who lets strange men buy her drinks?


----------



## Jeff

Do I look like a strange man?


----------



## telracs

Jeff said:


> Do I look like a strange man?


Compared to what?

Why are my sweatshirt sleeves so long?


----------



## Jeff

Any strange women want to go dancing?


Spoiler



Not Scarlet. Her arms are too short or her sleeves are too long.


----------



## Valmore Daniels

What does it mean when you are dancing on the ceiling?


----------



## Barbiedull

scarlet said:


> Do I look like the kind of girl who lets strange men buy her drinks?


Do you let strange WOMEN buy your drinks?


Spoiler



No, I didn't mean ME!


----------



## telracs

Valmore Daniels said:


> What does it mean when you are dancing on the ceiling?


Somebody played with gravity again?



Barbiedull said:


> Do you let strange WOMEN buy your drinks?
> 
> 
> Spoiler
> 
> 
> 
> No, I didn't mean ME!


Do I look like the sort of girl who lets strangers (regardless of gender) buy her drinks?



Jeff said:


> Any strange women want to go dancing?
> 
> 
> Spoiler
> 
> 
> 
> Not Scarlet. Her arms are too short or her sleeves are too long.


And why do you want to dance with strange women?


----------



## Barbiedull

Valmore Daniels said:


> What does it mean when you are dancing on the ceiling?


 Too many Margaritas?


----------



## Barbiedull

scarlet said:


> Do I look like the sort of girl who lets strangers (regardless of gender) buy her drinks?


You look very friendly...are you not?


----------



## telracs

Didn't your parents teach you not to take candy from strangers?


----------



## Barbiedull

scarlet said:


> Didn't your parents teach you not to take candy from strangers?





Spoiler



They said not to get in a van with a strange man who is looking for a lost puppy!


Do parents give warnings about a pretty lady in a red dress offering candy...?


Spoiler



They should..you just never know what to expect.


----------



## Brenda Carroll

Spoiler



Would you like some candy, little girl?


----------



## telracs

Are you calling me little?

If so, is that why my sleeves are too long?


----------



## Barbiedull

Brendan Carroll said:


> Spoiler
> 
> 
> 
> Would you like some candy, little girl?


Do you have a puppy? Or a lost bird?


----------



## lonestar

Barbiedull said:


> Too many Margaritas?


Is there such a thing as TOO many margaritas?


----------



## telracs

lonestar said:


> Is there such a thing as TOO many margaritas?


Is there too few people to drink them?


----------



## Barbiedull

lonestar said:


> Is there such a thing as TOO many margaritas?


 If they're really good, can't you have too many before you realize...?


----------



## telracs

Barbiedull said:


> Do you have a puppy? Or a lost bird?


And are you driving a van?


----------



## Susan in VA

A van? Aren't pickup trucks mandatory in Texas?



Spoiler



In keeping with the pick-on-Texans theme in the past page or two...


----------



## telracs

what are you doing up this late?

for that matter, what am I doing up this late?


----------



## Susan in VA

Late? Aren't we always still up at this time? 

(I'm _trying_ to get to bed by midnight, but it's just not happening...)


----------



## Susan in VA

When the heck did I become Emily Dickinson?


----------



## telracs

Is it at 7500?


----------



## Susan in VA

Probably.  Can you believe I'm too lazy to go look it up?


----------



## lonestar

Where did everyone go?


----------



## Brenda Carroll

Did we go somewhere? Did I miss the bus again?


----------



## Barbiedull

Brendan Carroll said:


> Did we go somewhere? Did I miss the bus again?


Weren't you driving the van?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

Barbiedull said:


> Weren't you driving the van?


Who came up with that plan?


----------



## Barbiedull

Valmore Daniels said:


> Who came up with that plan?


It was a man in a van, but who knows his plan?


----------



## intinst

The man in the van had a plan?


----------



## Barbiedull

intinst said:


> The man in the van had a plan?


Is anyone _sure_ he had a plan?


----------



## Tip10

I don't know about a plan but was the man in the van eating a flan?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

Tip10 said:


> I don't know about a plan but was the man in the van eating a flan?


Was his name Dan or Stan?


----------



## intinst

Was Dan, the man in the van making a plan while eating a flan, drinking from a can?


----------



## Barbiedull

intinst said:


> Was Dan, the man in the van making a plan while eating a flan, drinking from a can?


How did he drive with no hand?


----------



## Tip10

Who says he had no hand?
Just because he was eating a flan and drinking a can?
Perhaps he was being fed by Nan?


----------



## telracs

Tip, are you gonna share the happy juice you're drinking?


----------



## Tip10

Its MONDAY -- we gotta do something to be able to face the week don't we?


----------



## Barbiedull

Tip10 said:


> Who says he had no hand?
> Just because he was eating a flan and drinking a can?
> Perhaps he was being fed by Nan?


Nan? How grand! She rode in the van with Dan (or Stan) and fed him flan, while he drank from a can?


----------



## telracs

Tip10 said:


> Its MONDAY -- we gotta do something to be able to face the week don't we?


Yeah, don't you know that's why I'm asking you to share?


----------



## Susan in VA

If Tip shares the happy juice, does that mean you're gonna share your chocolate stash?


----------



## telracs

Do I gotta?


----------



## Susan in VA

Well, why don'tcha?


----------



## Tip10

I'm headin' to the cellar. I got a nice 8x8 climate controlled one. What's you preference - red, white or in between?


----------



## telracs

Red wine and dark chocolate, anyone?


----------



## D. Nathan Hilliard

Did Charlie Brown ever get to kick that football?


----------



## crebel

scarlet said:


> Red wine and dark chocolate, anyone?


Have we started yet?


----------



## Susan in VA

scarlet said:


> Red wine and dark chocolate, anyone?


Count me in! Is there any left?


----------



## Jeff

Wine and chocolate? Why didn't anybody take me up on my offer for beer and honky-tonkin'?


----------



## telracs

Jeff said:


> Wine and chocolate? Why didn't anybody take me up on my offer for beer and honky-tonkin'?


'Cause I don't like beer?


----------



## Susan in VA

Really?

(I don't either.)


----------



## Jeff

Are you ladies always such kill-joys?


----------



## telracs

Jeff said:


> Are you ladies always such kill-joys?


Maybe it depends on the kind of joy?

And didn't you say you didn't want to dance with me?


----------



## Jeff

Didn't you say I was strange?


----------



## Susan in VA

What's kill-joy about not liking beer?

Did you think that means we don't like to have fun?


----------



## Rita

He paid HOW much for those chairs?
(I'm watching Antique Roadshow)


----------



## telracs

Jeff said:


> Didn't you say I was strange?


Didn't you know strange is a compliment?


----------



## Rita

Is giving a compliment to a stranger strange?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

Would it be strange if a stranger gave YOU a compliment?


----------



## Rita

If a stranger gave me a strange compliment should I consider it to be strange?


----------



## Jeff

How about German beer and Texas line-dancing?

http://www.myvideo.de/watch/1432803/Stompin_Boots_Country_und_Line_Dance_Party

Or do you think that's strange?


----------



## Susan in VA

Jeff said:


> How about German beer and Texas line-dancing?


Wild horses couldn't drag me to an event like that.  Maybe it helps to consume large quantities of beer?


----------



## Debra Purdy Kong

How about: Can We Go Now?


----------



## Jeff

Where are we going?


----------



## Rita

Jeff said:


> How about German beer and Texas line-dancing?
> 
> http://www.myvideo.de/watch/1432803/Stompin_Boots_Country_und_Line_Dance_Party
> 
> Or do you think that's strange?


I've never had German beer or lined danced. Might you think that strange?


----------



## Jeff

Is that a loaded question?


----------



## lonestar

Can we all get in the van to go to the dance?
Can we take the beer, wine and chocolate when we go?


----------



## Brenda Carroll

Susan in VA said:


> Wild horses couldn't drag me to an event like that.  Maybe it helps to consume large quantities of beer?


Would that be at the Oktoberfest in Fredricksburg, Texas or just any day in Lukenbach, Texas?


----------



## lonestar

Did someone say they need some wild horses?


----------



## Susan in VA

Brendan Carroll said:


> Would that be at the Oktoberfest in Fredricksburg, Texas or just any day in Lukenbach, Texas?


Did you know there's also a Fredericksburg in Virginia. about 40 miles from me?


----------



## Jeff

Didn't George Washington's mother live in Fredericksburg?


----------



## Susan in VA

Was that at Ferry Farm?


----------



## Jeff

Didn't Mary Washington (George's mother) move across the river from Ferry Farm to Fredericksburg?


----------



## Susan in VA

Would she have needed a U-Row instead of a U-Haul?


----------



## Jeff

Doesn't that depend upon where on the Rappahannock she crossed?


----------



## Susan in VA

Why would it?  Isn't it all full of water?


----------



## Jeff

Don't you cross it fairly regularly?


----------



## Susan in VA

Me?? 

No.


----------



## Jeff

Who should we ask?


----------



## Susan in VA

Are you looking for someone who crosses the Rappahannock regularly?

Why?


----------



## Jeff

Didn't you want to know if it's full of water?


----------



## Susan in VA

Aren't there some things one can safely assume?


----------



## telracs

Why is my kindle thinking 3 hours ahead?


----------



## Susan in VA

It's YOUR Kindle, right?  So does it surprise you that it thinks it's in Greenland?


----------



## caracara

Susan in VA said:


> Aren't there some things one can safely assume?


Do you really want the people that were wondering about German beer and such assuming anything?


----------



## lonestar

Whatever happened to Kreskin?


----------



## Jeff

Didn't he disappear?


----------



## Barbiedull

Who cleaned up in here?


Spoiler



Last night it was empty in here, and all I saw was discarded chocolate wrappers, empty beer bottles, and one odd shoe...


 Did someone have a party in here?


----------



## Tip10

What kind of shoe?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

Are you missing one?


----------



## Barbiedull

Tip10 said:


> What kind of shoe?












Who owns this shoe?

and this...http://instatick.files.wordpress.com/2010/08/aftermath.jpg



Spoiler



Who wants to play Fact or Crap?


----------



## telracs

You had a party and didn't invite me?

And that can't be my shoe, don't you know I would have eaten ALL the chocolates?


----------



## Brenda Carroll

Barbiedull said:


> Who cleaned up in here?
> 
> 
> Spoiler
> 
> 
> 
> Last night it was empty in here, and all I saw was discarded chocolate wrappers, empty beer bottles, and one odd shoe...
> 
> 
> Did someone have a party in here?





Spoiler



I found an odd shoe once. It meant something very, very sinister. I later found the other shoe in the mud outside my bedroom window and that was even scarier. My ex-wife told me that she had no idea whose shoes they were, but I don't believe her. I think we were visited by gnomes!!



Have you ever seen fairy shoes?


----------



## telracs

Brendan Carroll said:


> Have you ever seen fairy shoes?


Do fairies wear shoes?


----------



## Barbiedull

scarlet said:


> You had a party and didn't invite me?
> 
> And that can't be my shoe, don't you know I would have eaten ALL the chocolates?


Maybe we missed the invitations?
Could there have been two shoes to begin with?


----------



## Barbiedull

Brendan Carroll said:


> Spoiler
> 
> 
> 
> I found an odd shoe once. It meant something very, very sinister. I later found the other shoe in the mud outside my bedroom window and that was even scarier. My ex-wife told me that she had no idea whose shoes they were, but I don't believe her. I think we were visited by gnomes!!





Spoiler



Is it illegal to put quicksand outside her window now?


 For her protection, of course!


----------



## Barbiedull

Cobbie said:


> Didn't you know she hid the other one? The fairy one?


 Cobbie, maybe we ATE the fairy shoe by accident, and that's why no one can remember the PARTY?


----------



## telracs

Do you think I have enough self restraint to only eat ONE shoe?


----------



## Barbiedull

scarlet said:


> Do you think I have enough self restraint to only eat ONE shoe?


 Do we know the after-effects of eating fairy shoes?


----------



## telracs

Has anybody seen my football?


----------



## Jeff

scarlet said:


> Has anybody seen my football?


Have you asked Bill Clinton?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

Isn't Bill Clinton having some health issues lately?


----------



## intinst

Didn't Bill Clinton misplace the "biscuit" not the "football?"


----------



## Barbiedull

Do you think these questions will be in the next "Fact or Crap" game?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

Think I can get my friends to stop playing "Dominion" and other stragedy type games on our game night to play "Fact or Crap"?


----------



## lonestar

How about those Texas Rangers?


----------



## Barbiedull

Cobbie said:


> _YES_...how ABOUT those Texas Rangers?


THESE Texas Rangers?


Spoiler



...just kidding...


----------



## Barbiedull

Cobbie, I bet Texas has a lot of cute Rangers?


Spoiler



I love a man in uniform...!


----------



## Barbiedull

Cobbie said:


> Aren't all Texas men cute?


How could I know? I'm not from Texas.



Spoiler



That sounds like the Lyle Lovett song "That's Right (You're Not from Texas)".


----------



## Barbiedull

Cobbie said:


> Well, shouldn't you be?


 Are you willing to share the Rangers?


Spoiler



Never say never...we almost moved there once. It could still happen.


----------



## telracs

Why am I *ALREADY* panicking about my trip?


----------



## Barbiedull

scarlet said:


> Why am I *ALREADY* panicking about my trip?


Your Scotland trip?


----------



## telracs

Barbiedull said:


> Your Scotland trip?


Do I have any others?


----------



## Barbiedull

scarlet said:


> Do I have any others?


I don't know...do you?


----------



## Barbiedull

I wonder if anyone ate that pretty chocolate shoe?


----------



## lonestar

Where did the Fall weather go?


----------



## caracara

Are you missing the fall weather?
Am I missing it?


Spoiler



Nope, I love the heat!


----------



## intinst

Weren't they already doomed?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

Are you trick or treating this year?


----------



## lonestar

Do we have to chose which one?


----------



## Brenda Carroll

Did someone say witch?


----------



## Tip10

Where's the green one?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

Did someone call?


----------



## telracs

Tip10 said:


> Where's the green one?


Didn't you see my avatar?


----------



## Tip10

Are you Elphaba in disguise?


----------



## Jeff

Don't you think she looks more like Nessarose?


----------



## telracs

Jeff said:


> Don't you think she looks more like Nessarose?


Me?


----------



## Tip10

But Nessarose isn't green?

And besides, she's much nicer than Nessarose, isn't she?


----------



## telracs

What is it with the Giants hurting other quarterbacks?


----------



## Susan in VA

Does anyone have any virtual chocolate to share?


----------



## Jeff

You want chocolate? Do you have an excuse for your absence?


----------



## Susan in VA

Does it have to be signed by my mom?


----------



## telracs

http://www.godiva.com/product/5-pc-pumpkin-patch-truffles/id/2452.gdv?SE_Section=Shop&SE_Category=169&lastCat=169

how's this?


----------



## Susan in VA

Pumpkin-spice ganache seems like an interesting idea, doesn't it?  

But are any truffles really worth $ 2.60 apiece?


----------



## telracs

Susan in VA said:


> Pumpkin-spice ganache seems like an interesting idea, doesn't it?
> 
> But are any truffles really worth $ 2.60 apiece?


It's Godiva, isn't it worth it?


----------



## Susan in VA

Godiva's yummy, but did you know that in taste tests by serious chocoholics, Godiva doesn't usually make the top three?


----------



## telracs

What does?


----------



## Susan in VA

Why? Would it matter to your Godiva habit? 



Spoiler



The three or four times I attended, Lindt won first place. Second and third were various other Swiss and German ones, with a Belgian at some point. These were unlabeled bowls of chocolate bits, milk and dark, small enough to be unidentifiable by shape or pattern.


----------



## telracs

If you're just testing random bits of chocolate, how does that test truffles and other things?


----------



## Susan in VA

With every truffle manufacturer having different flavor combinations, how could you fairly compare those?


----------



## Jeff

Don't pigs choose truffles?


----------



## Susan in VA

It only feels that way after the sixth one.


----------



## Valmore Daniels

Can you even stop at just one?


----------



## Brenda Carroll

Don't truffles come multiples of two?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

Isn't 3 the luckiest number?


----------



## Alle Meine Entchen

how many places can I post this pic on this forum?










(can you tell I'm a proud mama?)


----------



## lonestar

Alle Meine Entchen said:


> how many places can I post this pic on this forum?
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> (can you tell I'm a proud mama?)


Why wouldn't you be?



Spoiler



What a cutie!


----------



## Susan in VA

Spoiler



What a cutie!



Do we have a thread just for our kids in Halloween costumes? If not, why not?


----------



## telracs

Susan in VA said:


> Do we have a thread just for our kids in Halloween costumes? If not, why not?


why don't you start one?



Spoiler



and i agree, she is adorable.


----------



## Susan in VA

Don't you think that Entchen's DD should be first in that thread?


----------



## telracs

http://www.kboards.com/index.php/topic,40744.0.html

how's this?


----------



## Susan in VA

Didn't you forget to credit and/or identify it?


----------



## telracs

http://www.kboards.com/index.php/topic,40744.msg724759.html#msg724759

better now?


----------



## Susan in VA

How'd you do that so fast??


----------



## telracs

Susan in VA said:


> How'd you do that so fast??


didn't you know I'm the cut and paste queen?


----------



## Susan in VA

So how many crowns does that make now?


----------



## telracs

One for each day of the week?


----------



## Susan in VA

Do they have labels, kind of like day-of-the-week undies for very little kids?


----------



## telracs

Are you saying my crowns are childish?


----------



## Susan in VA

No, but how else do you know which is which?  Moonstone-decorated on Mondays, topaz-encrusted on Tuesdays, wulfenite-laden on Wednesdays, tourmaline-sprinkled on Thursdays?


----------



## telracs

Wulfenite?


----------



## tsilver

Is snarky a real word?  I never heard of it before I became a member of Kindle Boards.


----------



## lonestar

What about opals?  Lots of opals?


----------



## telracs

lonestar said:


> What about opals? Lots of opals?


Don't you know opals are bad luck?


----------



## Barbiedull

scarlet said:


> Don't you know opals are bad luck?


Would emeralds clash with your skin?


----------



## caracara

How are opals bad luck?!


----------



## caracara

tsilver said:


> Is snarky a real word? I never heard of it before I became a member of Kindle Boards.


If you heard it on KB why wouldn't it be a real word?


----------



## telracs

tsilver said:


> Is snarky a real word? I never heard of it before I became a member of Kindle Boards.


how's this? http://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/snarky


----------



## Brenda Carroll

scarlet said:


> Don't you know opals are bad luck?


But that's just if you wear them and they are not your birthstone, right?


Spoiler



Opals are my birthstone, but I don't have any.


----------



## Valmore Daniels

scarlet said:


> how's this? http://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/snarky


Isn't that a derivative from "Snark", coined by Lewis Carroll as a nonce word in 1874 The Hunting of the Snark, about the quest for an elusive creature?


----------



## lonestar

scarlet said:


> Don't you know opals are bad luck?


Do you really believe this?


----------



## Ann in Arlington

Opals are bad luck if you buy them yourself, but what if some one buys them _for_ you as a gift?


----------



## geoffthomas

Wikipedia says:
In the Middle Ages, opal was considered a stone that could provide great luck because it was believed to possess all the virtues of each gemstone whose color was represented in the color spectrum of the opal. It was also said to confer the power of invisibility if wrapped in a fresh bay leaf and held in the hand. Following the publication of Sir Walter Scott's Anne of Geierstein in 1829, however, opal acquired a less auspicious reputation. In Scott's novel, the Baroness of Arnheim wears an opal talisman with supernatural powers. When a drop of holy water falls on the talisman, the opal turns into a colorless stone and the Baroness dies soon thereafter. Due to the popularity of Scott's novel, people began to associate opals with bad luck and death. Even as recently as the beginning of the 20th century, it was believed that when a Russian saw an opal among other goods offered for sale, he or she should not buy anything more since the opal was believed to embody the evil eye.

But come on now, how can anything that attractive be bad?
I think it is an uncommonly good looking gem.
And have gifted many opals.

Just sayin....


----------



## Susan in VA

geoffthomas said:


> It was also said to confer the power of invisibility if wrapped in a fresh bay leaf and held in the hand.


Hmm... I have both... think I should go test that?  



geoffthomas said:


> In Scott's novel, the Baroness of Arnheim wears an opal talisman with supernatural powers. When a drop of holy water falls on the talisman, the opal turns into a colorless stone and the Baroness dies soon thereafter. Due to the popularity of Scott's novel, people began to associate opals with bad luck and death.


Okay, wait a minute... based on that account, shouldn't it be the holy water that brought bad luck?


----------



## lonestar

My mother believed that opals were bad luck and would not wear a bracelet she had received as a gift.  She gave it to my sister who was born in October.  I sure wanted that bracelet but she wouldn't give it to me.  They are beautiful stones and my favorite ring has a blue opal.

Me?  My daughter was born in October and that's good enough don't you think?


----------



## Tip10

My great grandmother was named Opal and it was really bad luck if you got caught stealing Christmas cookies while she was baking them. Does that count?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

My sister's birthstone is opal but my grandmother bought us both opal earrings. When my sister lost hers, she stole mine and then lost those as well. Did she get double bad luck or none since it is her birthstone?


----------



## Barbiedull

mom133d said:


> My sister's birthstone is opal but my grandmother bought us both opal earrings. When my sister lost hers, she stole mine and then lost those as well. Did she get double bad luck or none since it is her birthstone?


Doesn't it sound like BOTH you and your Sister had bad luck since all the Opals were stolen and/or lost?


----------



## Maud Muller

mom133d said:


> My sister's birthstone is opal but my grandmother bought us both opal earrings. When my sister lost hers, she stole mine and then lost those as well. Did she get double bad luck or none since it is her birthstone?


If Opals are bad luck wasn't it good luck that your sister lost the earings?


----------



## Barbiedull

Would a glass of opals be half full or half empty?


----------



## lonestar

Would a glass of opals be enough opals?


----------



## lonestar

What in the world?


----------



## geoffthomas

Why did you do that?


----------



## Jeff

Who said I did?


----------



## Susan in VA

Huh?  Did what??


----------



## telracs

Miss me?


----------



## Tip10

Who was aiming at you?


----------



## geoffthomas

and while we are at it, why didn't you take me along?


----------



## Barbiedull

Cobbie said:


> LOL
> Don't we always...even though you didn't take a picture of Mac?


Yes...didn't you know we _want_ to see Mac?


----------



## Alle Meine Entchen

why is it that an open bag of peanut m&ms call to me until I eat them all?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

Why are giraffes necks so long?



Spoiler



So it will reach it's head.


----------



## lonestar

Who's Mac?



Alle Meine Entchen said:


> why is it that an open bag of peanut m&ms call to me until I eat them all?


Will you share?


----------



## Alle Meine Entchen

Alle Meine Entchen said:


> why is it that an open bag of peanut m&ms call to me until I eat them all?





lonestar said:


> Will you share?


why do people always ask me to share my chocolate?


----------



## Barbiedull

Cobbie said:


> Have you read Scarlet's blog?


Why haven't you read about the Mac who shall remain unseen by us?


----------



## jbh13md

Easy Mac? Is that a human food?


----------



## Barbiedull

jbh13md said:


> Easy Mac? Is that a human food?


Is eye candy a food group?


----------



## Brenda Carroll

Eye candy is glazed carrots, right?


----------



## Susan in VA

^^^  
Do we have a thread yet just for wacky definitions?


----------



## Bonbonlover

lonestar said:


> Who's Mac?





> Have you read Scarlett's Blog[/quot?e]
> 
> Who's Scarlett?


----------



## akpak

Maybe this has been asked before:

Will it blend?


----------



## Tip10

Scarlet and Mac?

Don't you think that a little personal?


----------



## JennaAnderson

Are you talking to me?


----------



## JennaAnderson

Susan in VA said:


> ^^^
> Do we have a thread yet just for wacky definitions?


What do you mean?


----------



## Alle Meine Entchen

why are sleeping babies warmer than awake babies?


----------



## Susan in VA

JennaAnderson said:


> What do you mean?


Didn't see you Brendan's post right before mine?


----------



## Susan in VA

Alle Meine Entchen said:


> why are sleeping babies warmer than awake babies?


Yes, isn't that strange?
(I thought I was imagining that, but I noticed it too with DD. Good to know it's not just me.)


----------



## geoffthomas

Why do people find it necessary to disturb sleeping babies?


----------



## Tip10

Yet they let sleeping dogs lie?


----------



## Barbiedull

Bonbonlover said:


> Who's Scarlett?


Scarlet, is Scarlet...isn't that obvious? Have you been eating her Bonbons?


----------



## telracs

Is it weird that I don't take pictures of people?

And is it even weirder that I'm at the Edinburgh airport already?


----------



## Jeff

Are we having fun yet?


Spoiler



Or is only Scarlet having fun?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

Which shoe do you put on first?



Spoiler



The right one.


----------



## lonestar

Shoes?


----------



## Annalog

Valmore Daniels said:


> Which shoe do you put on first?


I was in a class where this was one of the assignments and guess what I learned about myself?


Spoiler



The shoe that is closest to me is the one that I put on first. This is sometimes the left and sometimes the right. Anyone else do something similar? Are you ambidextrous?


----------



## Barbiedull

I found myself looking for the spoiler icon when I was sending a text message on my phone...
Am I spending too much time here?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

Is that possible?


----------



## geoffthomas

Why?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

Will it really snow tomorrow?


----------



## Barbiedull

mom133d said:


> Will it really snow tomorrow?


I'm not ready for snow..are you?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

Am I ever ready for snow?


Spoiler



Answer: No. Even the word makes me cold.


----------



## telracs

Jeff said:


> Are we having fun yet?
> 
> 
> Spoiler
> 
> 
> 
> Or is only Scarlet having fun?


What kind of fun can be had at the Edinburgh airport at 1 am?


----------



## Jeff

Do you really want an answer to that question?


----------



## Barbiedull

Jeff said:


> Do you really want an answer to that question?


Do you have one?


----------



## Jeff

Dare I share it?


----------



## Barbiedull

Jeff said:


> Dare I share it?


Of course, why not?


----------



## Jeff

Are you old enough?


----------



## Barbiedull

Jeff said:


> Are you old enough?


 Old enough to know better?
Too old to care?


----------



## lonestar

Are we telling the truth?


----------



## Jeff

Can you handle the truth?


----------



## telracs

What is "truth"?


----------



## geoffthomas

Why haven't we answered the question about What kind of fun can be had at the Edinburgh airport at 1 am?


----------



## telracs

geoffthomas said:


> Why haven't we answered the question about What kind of fun can be had at the Edinburgh airport at 1 am?


Because there's no fun to be had a 1 am at the Edinburgh airport?


----------



## geoffthomas

That could be the reason, couldn't it?


----------



## Jeff

Could it be that Scarlet's no fun?


----------



## Barbiedull

Jeff said:


> Could it be that Scarlet's no fun?


Jeff, what would you do for fun at 1 a.m. in an airport?


----------



## telracs

Jeff said:


> Could it be that Scarlet's no fun?


Do you really think I'm no fun?


----------



## Jeff

Barbiedull said:


> Jeff, what would you do for fun at 1 a.m. in an airport?


With or without Scarlet?



scarlet said:


> Do you really think I'm no fun?


Didn't I pose a question about that recently?


----------



## Barbiedull

Jeff said:


> With or without Scarlet?
> Didn't I pose a question about that recently?


Without?


Spoiler



Didn't you say Scarlet is no fun?


----------



## Jeff

Me?


----------



## telracs

Cobbie said:


> You talking to Jeff? Sweet, kind Jeff?


How much did he pay you?


----------



## Jeff

Did you get the gift card, Cobbie?


----------



## Brenda Carroll

I like Jeff, too;can I get a gift card?


----------



## Jeff

Have you checked your email?


----------



## Barbiedull

Cobbie said:


> Lol...would I tell?


Cobbie, did you spend that gift card in the accessories anonymous thread?


Spoiler



A girl could go broke in there with you evil Kindle people...


----------



## telracs

are enablers evil?


----------



## Barbiedull

scarlet said:


> are enablers evil?





Spoiler



It was a joke from that thread.


 Not Cobbie, isn't she a nice enabler?


----------



## telracs

what _is_ the difference between a sociopath and psychopath?


----------



## Barbiedull

scarlet said:


> what _is_ the difference between a sociopath and psychopath?


Organization?


Spoiler



I'm always learning something new on this board.



Because of the organized personality of the psychopath, he or she might have a tendency to be better educated than the average sociopath, who probably lacks the attentive skills to excel in school. While psychopaths can fly under the radar of society, many maintaining families and steady work, a sociopath more often lacks the skills and drive for mimicking normal behavior, making "seemingly healthy" relationships and a stable home less likely.

From a criminal standpoint, a sociopath's crimes are typically disorganized and spontaneous, while the psychopath's crimes are well planned out. For this reason, psychopaths are harder to catch than sociopaths, as the sociopath is more apt to leave ample evidence in his or her explosions of violence.

http://www.wisegeek.com/what-is-the-difference-between-a-psychopath-and-a-sociopath.htm


----------



## telracs

Then why does Sherlock call himself a high-functioning sociopath?


Spoiler



I'm re-watching A Study in Pink


----------



## Annalog

Did I find the following in _The New Oxford American Dictionary_?

*sociopath* n. a person with a personality disorder manifesting itself in extreme antisocial attitudes and behavior and a lack of conscience.

*psychopath* n. a person suffering from chronic mental disorder with abnormal or violent social behavior.

Does this mean that Sherlock is a high-functioning sociopath because he is antisocial and has no conscience but is able to deal with people? Does it appear to others that a sociopath is not necessarily violent?


----------



## lonestar

scarlet said:


> what _is_ the difference between a sociopath and psychopath?


Should we be concerned?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

Are we ourselves?


----------



## lonestar

Is anyone else happy about the extra hour?


----------



## telracs

Did you know I got 2 extra hours this year?


Spoiler



last week in the UK and now here.


----------



## Barbiedull

lonestar said:


> Is anyone else happy about the extra hour?


Someone stole my extra hour! I woke up and it was gone. Was it Scarlet?


----------



## lonestar

Is she hoarding our extra hours?


----------



## Barbiedull

lonestar said:


> Is she hoarding our extra hours?


Maybe someone has them in a "time capsule"?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

Did anyone else forget there is a time change besides me?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

Was this the trip that included Captain Jack?


----------



## telracs

Barbiedull said:


> Maybe someone has them in a "time capsule"?


Maybe they're in my "hour" glass?



mom133d said:


> Was this the trip that included Captain Jack?


You haven't seen my concert pictures?


Spoiler



yes, this was the Scotland trip to see John Barrowman.


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

scarlet said:


> You haven't seen my concert pictures?


How did I miss them?!


----------



## Barbiedull

scarlet said:


> You haven't seen my concert pictures?


 I missed them too. Are they on your blog?


----------



## telracs

Barbiedull said:


> I missed them too. Are they on your blog?


Haven't looked on the photo board here, have you?


----------



## Barbiedull

scarlet said:


> Haven't looked on the photo board here, have you?





Spoiler



No. Too many threads to keep up with!


Can you post a link?


----------



## Barbiedull

Cobbie said:


> Here is is:
> 
> http://www.kboards.com/index.php/topic,41492.0.html





Spoiler



Thank you Cobbie.


 Scarlet, you had great seats, didn't you?


----------



## NogDog

Cobbie said:


> Here is is:
> 
> http://www.kboards.com/index.php/topic,41492.0.html





Barbiedull said:


> Thank you Cobbie. Scarlet, you had great seats!


How come nobody is complaining that those aren't questions, when I got jumped on here before for not posting in the form of a question?


----------



## bobavey

Alle Meine Entchen said:


> How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood?


It would chuck as much as a wouldchuck could, if a wood chuck could chuck wood.


----------



## Susan in VA

NogDog said:


> How come nobody is complaining that those aren't questions, when I got jumped on here before for not posting in the form of a question?


You just got there faster than any of the complainers.   How's Noggin?


----------



## velicion

Who's drunk my beer?


----------



## Susan in VA

Cobbie said:


> I just put a question mark after any sentence?


Or you could raise your eyebrows questioningly as you type.  Would that count?


----------



## telracs

Cobbie said:


> Why wouldn't it count?


Because we don't have webcams?


----------



## Susan in VA

Wouldn't it be fun if we had a video version of the KB chatroom?


----------



## Barbiedull

Ok, I have changed my statement to a question, is everyone happy?


Spoiler



Please leave all complaints in the form of a question.


----------



## telracs

If you don't look at the photo board, does that mean you haven't seen my flower of the day photos?  Or my Scotland photos?


----------



## Barbiedull

scarlet said:


> If you don't look at the photo board, does that mean you haven't seen my flower of the day photos? Or my Scotland photos?





Spoiler



I've seen some of the flower of the day photos, and your Scotland photos from your blog. ..And the concert photos that Cobbie pointed me to.


 Am I still missing some? How does anyone keep up with all the threads?


----------



## telracs

Barbiedull said:


> Am I still missing some? How does anyone keep up with all the threads?


Don't you know you're missing lots?

Maybe you could just go to the photo subboard and look for new post?


----------



## Susan in VA

I can't keep up either.  Couldn't we have the clocks go back by 25 hours instead of just one?  Wouldn't an extra day be useful?


----------



## lonestar

velicion said:


> Who's drunk my beer?


There was beer? Is it ALL gone?


----------



## Jeff

How many bottles of beer on the wall?


----------



## telracs

Jeff said:


> How many bottles of beer on the wall?


How long have we been drinking?


----------



## Jeff

Is there a correlation between time and consumption?


----------



## Susan in VA

Jeff said:


> Is there a correlation between time and consumption?


That depends. Are you trying to be in the Guinness Book of World Records?


----------



## Jeff

Is Guinness Irish dry stout beer?


----------



## Susan in VA

How would I know?  Where's Ann when you need to know these things?


----------



## Jeff

Where are most sensible people at 11:30 on a work-night?


----------



## Susan in VA

A work-night?  Is it April already?


----------



## telracs

Jeff said:


> Where are most sensible people at 11:30 on a work-night?


Sleeping? Or working?


----------



## Jeff

Is the answer yes or no?


----------



## telracs

Are you saying if we're here we're not sensible?


Spoiler



and on that note, I'm going to sleep.


----------



## Jeff

Did you say good night Gracie?


----------



## telracs

Jeff said:


> Did you say good night Gracie?


Who's Gracie?


----------



## lonestar

Gracie, are you out there?


----------



## Jeff

You never heard George Burns say that to Gracie Allen?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

How old do you think we are?


----------



## Barbiedull

Jeff said:


> You never heard George Burns say that to Gracie Allen?


Didn't he keep saying goodnight to her long after she died?


Spoiler



I remember seeing him on The Tonight Show over the years and he still said it...and he lived to be 100!


----------



## Jeff

Why am I always the oldest person in the room?


----------



## Tip10

Because you are so young at heart?


----------



## Jeff

Do you remember George Burns and Gracie Allen?


----------



## Jeff

Did you tell mom133d?


----------



## Barbiedull

Cobbie and Jeff...? Cobbie and Jeff...? Old?


Spoiler



IMPOSSIBLE.



Maybe that beautiful Texas weather helps keep you young?


----------



## Jeff

Why does Cobbie look twenty years younger than I do? Does she lie about her age?


----------



## Tip10

Barbiedull said:


> Cobbie and Jeff...? Cobbie and Jeff...? Old?
> 
> 
> Spoiler
> 
> 
> 
> IMPOSSIBLE.
> 
> 
> 
> Maybe that beautiful Texas weather helps keep you young?


I think its more likely that its that thing sittin' on his knee in hios avatar that's keepin' him young -- don't you?


----------



## Barbiedull

Tip10 said:


> I think its more likely that its that thing sittin' on his knee in hios avatar that's keepin' him young -- don't you?


Why do my children make _me_ feel old? Maybe I need grandchildren?


----------



## Barbiedull

Jeff said:


> Why does Cobbie look twenty years younger than I do? Does she lie about her age?


Maybe you need to join us in the makeup thread? ....


Spoiler



just kidding..


----------



## Valmore Daniels

Are you really only as old as you feel?


----------



## telracs

Did you know that Frank Gorshin did a one man show as George Burns on Broadway a few years ago?


----------



## lonestar

Isn't age just a state of mind?


----------



## Jeff

lonestar said:


> Isn't age just a state of mind?


Huh? What was that again?


----------



## geoffthomas

And I know you from where?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

Have you heard that the bird is the word?


----------



## geoffthomas

Don't Panic?


----------



## Barbiedull

Are you talking to me?


----------



## telracs

Isn't Grease the word?


----------



## lonestar

Bacon grease?


----------



## vwkitten

Can you imagine bacon flavored chewing gum?


----------



## lonestar

Are you sharing?


----------



## telracs

what color do green girls blush?


----------



## Barbiedull

scarlet said:


> what color do green girls blush?


Purple?


----------



## Tip10

scarlet said:


> what color do green girls blush?


Do they blush or are they just envious?


----------



## Brenda Carroll

Is it blue?  Is it blue?


----------



## telracs

Romulan Ale?


----------



## caracara

Why did we decide to make it 1001 post to get to Scheherazade?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

Who hid the house keys!


----------



## lonestar

What is the combination to that darn safe?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

Didn't you write it down?


----------



## Barbiedull

Valmore Daniels said:


> Who hid the house keys!


Do we need a random exclamation thread?


----------



## telracs

Password?


----------



## Barbiedull

Cobbie said:


> Would that have been an easy one to remember?


Wouldn't that be the first thing a hacker would try?


Spoiler



I have read that a lot of people use that!


----------



## Tip10

Do you curse at your passwords?

One place I worked had rules that did not allow dictionary words to be used as passwords which is not all that unusual.
One day we changed the dictionary to one that included curse words....
and promptly blew up dozens upon dozens of passwords!


----------



## Jeff

Have you tried random passwords?


----------



## geoffthomas

What is a password?


----------



## Tip10

Isn't it that thing that is written down on the sticky note stuck on the top of your monitor?


----------



## caracara

Or the thing written down on piece of paper that you can no longer find?


----------



## lonestar

I was supposed to write it down?


----------



## caracara

I don't know, were you?


----------



## telracs

Did you know that caracara has hit 1000 posts?


----------



## caracara

scarlet said:


> Did you know that caracara has hit 1000 posts?


Really? She did?


Spoiler



How cool!!! =)


----------



## geoffthomas

What's a spreadsheet?


----------



## Tip10

geoffthomas said:


> What's a spreadsheet?


Is that what you sit on at an outdoor concert in the park?


----------



## lonestar

Is it time for tortilla soup?


----------



## telracs

Why can't I upload my latest photobook?


----------



## Maud Muller

How much does it cost to get a password?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

How much do you have?


----------



## Barbiedull

Aren't passwords free until you lose them?


Spoiler



Then they are priceless because nothing works without them.


----------



## geoffthomas

How can you lose something taped to the front of your monitor?


----------



## Tip10

Haven't you ever changed monitors?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

I said, Doctor, is there nothing I can take?

... er, wrong thread


----------



## geoffthomas

Did you put the Lime in the Coconut?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

And shake it all up?


----------



## caracara

Did someone say chocolate milkshake for CaraCara?


----------



## lonestar

Chocolate?  Where?


----------



## telracs

caracara said:


> Did someone say chocolate milkshake for CaraCara?


Didn't we say chocolate mudslides?


----------



## vwkitten

Kahlua or Cask and Creme, which one is better for mudslides?


----------



## telracs

What's cask and creme?

And why aren't all client service departments as cool as kindle?


----------



## telracs

ice cream or sleep?


----------



## lonestar

Is it chocolate ice cream?


----------



## caracara

Is it chocolate ice cream with a straw in a cup?



Spoiler



No, I am not craving chocolate milkshake, not possible. I just had one last night!


----------



## Barbiedull

Say it _isn't_ butter pecan?


----------



## telracs

Is there a rule that says you can't have a milkshake every day?



Barbiedull said:


> Say it _isn't_ butter pecan?


It isn't butter pecan.


----------



## Bonbonlover

Could it be peppermint?


----------



## telracs

Could it have been mudpie?

And is it all gone now?


----------



## Barbiedull

Was it cookie dough?


Spoiler



The cookie dough ice cream carton is suddenly _empty_!


----------



## telracs

anybody want snickerdoodle ice cream?


Spoiler



and i didn't eat the cookie dough.


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

Can I have peppermint mocha?


----------



## telracs

mom133d said:


> Can I have peppermint mocha?


Ice cream, latte or frappucino?


----------



## geoffthomas

Ya' want some drizzle on top?


----------



## Jeff

Why is this thread causing my throat to constrict?


----------



## telracs

Jeff said:


> Why is this thread causing my throat to constrict?


Allergies?


----------



## Jeff

scarlet said:


> Allergies?


Would that make me the first person in the world to have a cyber-allergy?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

Would that only happen on Cyber-Monday, though?


----------



## Jeff

Wouldn't it be an historic event in any case?


----------



## geoffthomas

Could it be used as the inspiration for a historical novel?


----------



## Alle Meine Entchen

why did I agree to host Thanksgiving this year?


----------



## telracs

Why does turkey make me so tired even though I'm at work?


----------



## Barbiedull

scarlet said:


> Why does turkey make me so tired even though I'm at work?


You're working today?


Spoiler



No fun!


----------



## telracs

Barbiedull said:


> You're working today?
> 
> 
> Spoiler
> 
> 
> 
> No fun!


How did I know that someone would ask that question or something similiar?



Spoiler



other people on vacation, work needs to be done. and it means real turkey not vegetarian thanksgiving.


----------



## Bonbonlover

Why does work need to get done?


----------



## Barbiedull

scarlet said:


> How did I know that someone would ask that question or something similiar?
> 
> 
> 
> Spoiler
> 
> 
> 
> other people on vacation, work needs to be done. and it means real turkey not vegetarian thanksgiving.


Isn't it just like me to always ask the obvious?


Spoiler



My Husband works most holidays too. He works nights, so we usually get to have holiday dinners together.


----------



## telracs

Because it's not nice to wait for biopsy results just because of a holiday?


----------



## Barbiedull

Bonbonlover said:


> Why does work need to get done?


 Why does work need to get done? Random question police...please look over there...a squirrel..or rat...or something?



Spoiler



Some places never close, even on holidays...hospitals, police stations, airports...


----------



## telracs

Isn't it a bunny?  Or a birdie?


----------



## Bonbonlover

(Oh I know... I was just getting Random.  Bless you for working on holidays)


----------



## Barbiedull

scarlet said:


> Isn't it a bunny? Or a birdie?


Could it be a wild turkey running for safety?


----------



## telracs

Barbiedull said:


> Could it be a wild turkey running for safety?


Aren't the turkeys running after everyone?



Spoiler



and bonbonlover, no problem, no offense taken.


----------



## Barbiedull

scarlet said:


> Aren't the turkeys running after everyone?


 How can you keep track of who is chasing who, when they go 'round in a circle?


----------



## telracs

Anybody wanna Saturday night chat on Thursday?


----------



## lonestar

Why, why, why did I eat so much?


----------



## Alle Meine Entchen

lonestar said:


> Why, why, why did I eat so much?


why did I cook so much?


----------



## Barbiedull

Why did I have to do so many dishes?


----------



## telracs

Dishwasher for the holiday?


----------



## geoffthomas

How else do they get clean?


----------



## Barbiedull

scarlet said:


> Dishwasher for the holiday?


Aren't I always?


Spoiler



Ran the dishwasher twice yesterday, but still have to handwash the serving dishes and pots/pans.


----------



## vwkitten

When oh when will my ankles and feet stop aching from being on my feet cooking ALL day yesterday?


----------



## telracs

Would you ever have thought this thread would be 127 pages long?


----------



## intinst

Did you notice that it is 128 pages now?


----------



## telracs

How did I know that someone would correct me?


----------



## intinst

Why are you surprised that it was me?


----------



## vwkitten

Don't you just love surprises?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

Why would I like surprises?


----------



## Barbiedull

Valmore Daniels said:


> Why would I like surprises?


Why wouldn't you like surprises?


----------



## telracs

intinst said:


> Why are you surprised that it was me?


Who said I was surprised?


----------



## lonestar

Well, were you?  Surprised?


----------



## telracs

Do you honestly think I would admit it if I were?


----------



## Vegas_Asian

What If I poked u with a stick?


----------



## Barbiedull

Vegas_Asian said:


> What If I poked u with a stick?


Aren't you afraid of being abducted in her spaceship?


----------



## telracs

Is it okay to really like a book by an author you personally dislike?



Spoiler



and no, this does not refer to a present or past member of KB.


----------



## Barbiedull

scarlet said:


> Is it okay to really like a book by an author you personally dislike?
> 
> 
> 
> Spoiler
> 
> 
> 
> and no, this does not refer to a present or past member of KB.


That's a hard one isn't it?


Spoiler



Once I went to a concert of someone I really liked. Came out of there disliking the person, not the music. Never bought any of their work again...but that's just me.


----------



## Alle Meine Entchen

Cobbie said:


> How do you know enough about an author
> 
> 
> Spoiler
> 
> 
> 
> not on KB
> 
> 
> to dislike this author? Is it nonfiction?


Do you feel guilty about not liking them?



Spoiler



(there is an author that I won't read b/c she came out and blasted fanfiction and focused on how trashy ALL fanfiction is even though her books are fanfiction based on a Dr. Who character and she has some random sex scenes that do not carry the plot forward. I think that's fine)


----------



## Susan in VA

Are you guys still here?  This thread is unbelievable.


----------



## telracs

Can a random question be rhetorical?


----------



## Jeff

Susan in VA said:


> Are you guys still here? This thread is unbelievable.


Do you know how happy I am to "see" you?


----------



## Susan in VA

Jeff said:


> Do you know how happy I am to "see" you?





Spoiler



Awwww, thank you. I'm happy to be back. End-of-term stress accounted for the first few days, then the flu took over for a couple of weeks. Yuck.



Don't you think I'm even more happy to be back on my feet, and catching up here?


----------



## telracs

How long is it gonna take you to "catch up"?

And anybody want to chat?


----------



## Susan in VA

Do you think there's a hope in you-know-where that I can actually catch up on _everything_??

And if I show up in chat, will you update me on the key events/news/gossip that I've missed?


----------



## telracs

Susan in VA said:


> Do you think there's a hope in you-know-where that I can actually catch up on _everything_??
> 
> And if I show up in chat, will you update me on the key events/news/gossip that I've missed?


When are you gonna join Jeff and I?


----------



## Susan in VA

Not until you ask that more grammatically.  



Spoiler



Sorry, couldn't resist.


----------



## telracs

Susan in VA said:


> Not until you ask that more grammatically.
> 
> 
> 
> Spoiler
> 
> 
> 
> Sorry, couldn't resist.


Ah hem, when are you going to join Jeff and me?


----------



## Susan in VA

On my way.

Are we in the usual fancy meeting room at the Four Seasons?


----------



## telracs

Cobbie said:


> Is Susan back? Is Susan back?


Have you gotten past your Java issues so you can chat?


----------



## Susan in VA

Cobbie, are you having issues with too much coffee or something?  



Spoiler



Yes, I'm back.


----------



## Jeff

What can't Cobbie chat?


----------



## telracs

Jeff said:


> What can't Cobbie chat?


Is that like "Why can't Johnny read"?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

Why is Johnny red?


----------



## Susan in VA

Is he really red, or is that just his label?


----------



## telracs

Susan in VA said:


> He's not really, he's just labeled that way...


Have you been away so long you've forgotten the rule of this thread?


----------



## Susan in VA

Apparently I'm still in a weakened condition.  Did you know that it's possible to sleep for 20 hours a day, several days in a row?

(I'll go fix it.)


----------



## telracs

Susan in VA said:


> Apparently I'm still in a weakened condition. Did you know that it's possible to sleep for 20 hours a day, several days in a row?
> 
> (I'll go fix it.)


Why fix it?

And yes, unfortunately I know you can sleep for 20 hours a day and still feel lousy.


----------



## Susan in VA

scarlet said:
 

> Why fix it?


Wouldn't you give me a hard time about it otherwise?


----------



## vwkitten

What rules? Aren't rules made to be broken? or at least bent severely and stuffed in a little bag and dropped off a bridge while driving at a 105 mph with a train coming right at you?

Uh oh... is that a man in a white coat coming?



Spoiler



Welcome back Susan...


----------



## telracs

vw, how did you get out of the playhouse and back on to this thread?


----------



## vwkitten

Am I on the wrong thread?


----------



## velicion

Why isn't my pizza round?


----------



## Brenda Carroll

Why is the pizza all gone?


----------



## Jeff

Wasn't it you who ate all the pizza?


----------



## intinst

vwkitten said:


> Am I on the wrong thread?


There are wrong threads?


----------



## Barbiedull

Did anyone see the pizza I made for the "delete" thread? I think maybe I left it in the wrong room?


----------



## lonestar

Is this the room with the padded walls?


----------



## Jeff

The walls are padded with pizza?


----------



## Susan in VA

intinst said:


> There are wrong threads?


Of course. Don't you know that you have to use a thread that matches the fabric?


----------



## vwkitten

After a while, don't all the stranger threads look the same?


----------



## Jeff

How did strangers start a thread on this _members-only_ forum?


----------



## Barbiedull

vwkitten said:


> After a while, don't all the stranger threads look the same?


Stranger than _who_?


----------



## Tip10

Weren't we all strangers once?


----------



## lonestar

Is it possible to be strangers more than once?


----------



## Jeff

Some of us are stranger than others.


----------



## lonestar

Jeff said:


> Some of us are stranger than others.


Who could argue with that?


----------



## Jeff

lonestar said:


> Who could argue with that?


Have you met Scarlet?


----------



## vwkitten

Is Scarlet the one who argues with everything?


----------



## Barbiedull

vwkitten said:


> Is Scarlet the one who argues with everything?





Spoiler



Making popcorn...waiting for Scarlet to get here.


 Anyone want popcorn?


----------



## Jeff

Who said that?


----------



## telracs

Taking my name in vain?

And is there anymore popcorn?


----------



## Jeff

Who said you were vain? Extra butter?


----------



## telracs

Has anyone really met scarlet?


----------



## Jeff

Scarlet who?


----------



## Barbiedull

scarlet said:


> And is there anymore popcorn?


 My birds ate it, how about some chocolate?


----------



## Vegas_Asian

Depends, is it dark?


----------



## telracs

Is it vegan?


----------



## Barbiedull

scarlet said:


> Is it vegan?


 I only have Hershey's Special Dark...is that vegan?


Spoiler



I hope so, my Son eats it and he's vegetarian!


----------



## telracs

Is he a vegan?


Spoiler



if he's not, the chocolate is fine.


----------



## Barbiedull

scarlet said:


> Is he a vegan?
> 
> 
> Spoiler
> 
> 
> 
> if he's not, the chocolate is fine.





Spoiler



No, just vegetarian. He eats milk and eggs.


 Are you vegan?


----------



## Jeff

Isn't a Vegan from the star system of Vega?


----------



## geoffthomas

Will the sun rise again tomorrow?


----------



## lonestar

Do we HAVE to wait until tomorrow?


----------



## Tip10

Did the sun even rise today?



Spoiler



You couldn't prove it by looking outside here!! Nasty gray overcast day. Looks positively blustery and yucky (isn't that a technical meteorological term?)


----------



## Barbiedull

Tip10 said:


> Did the sun even rise today?
> 
> 
> 
> Spoiler
> 
> 
> 
> You couldn't prove it by looking outside here!! Nasty gray overcast day. Looks positively blustery and yucky (isn't that a technical meteorological term?)


Do you think it's a ploy to get us to buy daylight lamps?


----------



## vwkitten

No one saved me popcorn?  Is there any fudge?


----------



## telracs

vwkitten said:


> No one saved me popcorn? Is there any fudge?


Fossil Fuel Ice Cream?


----------



## Meredith Sinclair

Seriously?


----------



## Luke King

Is there any chocolate ice cream?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

Iced cream, or sherbet?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

Is there raspberry sherbert?


----------



## telracs

Rainbow Sherbert?


----------



## Barbiedull

scarlet said:


> Rainbow Sherbert?


 Why did I not know about colored text?


----------



## geoffthomas

Why is it still raining?


----------



## telracs

Barbiedull said:


> Why did I not know about colored text?




Have I created a monster?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

Why didn't I bring my personal laptop to work today?


----------



## Barbiedull

scarlet said:


> Have I created a monster?





Spoiler



...maybe


  Why is UPS hiding my DX ?


----------



## Barbiedull

Did you know that hex color codes work too?


----------



## jbh13md

Is that you John Wayne? Or are you Jeff Bridges?


----------



## telracs

Barbiedull said:


> Spoiler
> 
> 
> 
> ...maybe
> 
> 
> Why is UPS hiding my DX ?




The same reason fedex sent my package from Westcheter county to Allentown PA and then on to Manhattan?


----------



## Barbiedull

scarlet said:


> The same reason fedex sent my package from Westcheter county to Allentown PA and then on to Manhattan?


 Maybe they're trying to locate you by GPS and your UFO keeps moving?


----------



## lonestar

Can we make that buttered popcorn please?


----------



## caracara

back to that chocolate ice cream.... Can someone make me a shake?



Spoiler



Sorry Scarlet I kidnapped the delivery guy!


----------



## telracs

caracara said:


> back to that chocolate ice cream.... Can someone make me a shake?
> 
> 
> 
> Spoiler
> 
> 
> 
> Sorry Scarlet I kidnapped the delivery guy!


Did he have the chocolate ice cream?

And if mypublisher is sending me 2 books uploaded 10 minutes apart, why are they taking 2 different routes?


----------



## caracara

Yes he did, he ate it all before I got it.  I'm holding him for ransom money so I can buy more chocolate ice cream.

Does your publisher like messing with peoples heads?


----------



## telracs

Spoiler



It's not "my" publisher, it's "mypublisher.com"



Don't you know that delivery guys don't have ransom insurance?


----------



## Barbiedull

scarlet said:


> And if mypublisher is sending me 2 books uploaded 10 minutes apart, why are they taking 2 different routes?


They don't want to take a chance on BOTH getting lost in the mail together?


----------



## geoffthomas

What are THEY doing in the post together?


----------



## Barbiedull

Who ARE they, and what have they done?


----------



## Brenda Carroll

How do you know they did anything?


----------



## lonestar

How do we know they didn't?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

Where did they go and who did they go with?


----------



## Luke King

Is it reasonable to be expected to clean a shower when it isn't even located at a house where I often visit?


----------



## Susan in VA

Barbiedull said:


> Maybe they're trying to locate you by GPS and your UFO keeps moving?


Is that just possibly the best line of this thread?


Spoiler



Still laughing.


----------



## telracs

If you know I'm flying it, how is it still a UFO?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

Isn't it a Unique Flying Object?


----------



## Tip10

mom133d said:


> Isn't it a Unique Flying Object?


^^^^^^^^^^^^
Wasn't that a great recovery


----------



## Barbiedull

scarlet said:


> If you know I'm flying it, how is it still a UFO?


 If we don't know WHAT "it" is, isn't it still unidentified?

And...how can we be SURE that's YOU?


----------



## Jeff

Look - up in the sky - is it a bird, is it a plane, is it the mean, green flying machine?


----------



## Barbiedull

Jeff said:


> Look - up in the sky - is it a bird, is it a plane, is it the mean, green flying machine?


 Does it have an *Ü*ber *F*riendly *O*ccupant?


----------



## Barbiedull

Unverified Female Owner?


----------



## geoffthomas

Unquestionably Frustrating Owner?


----------



## Susan in VA

^^^ LOL!

Scarlet, do you need a license to fly that thing?


----------



## telracs

Barbiedull said:


> Unverified Female Owner?


Which is unverified, the "female" or the "owner"?



geoffthomas said:


> Unquestionably Frustrating Owner?


What am I frustrating? Or frustrated?


----------



## Barbiedull

scarlet said:


> Which is unverified, the "female" or the "owner"?


 I believe that would be the *owner*?


----------



## lonestar

There's an owner?


----------



## Barbiedull

lonestar said:


> There's an owner?


If Scarlet owns her UFO, wouldn't she be the owner?


----------



## Jeff

Wouldn't she have to identify it to own it?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

Couldn't she borrow or rent it?


----------



## Jeff

Is a driver's license required to fly?


----------



## telracs

Cobbie said:


> Does Scarlet have a driver's license?


nope.



Jeff said:


> Is a driver's license required to fly?


Why would it be?


----------



## Barbiedull

Jeff said:


> Wouldn't she have to identify it to own it?


Does she have to identify it if she LANDS it?

Scarlet, why are we all so confused?


----------



## Barbiedull

Cobbie said:


> Does Scarlet have a driver's license?


 If Scarlet had a drivers license, wouldn't she be identified since we use it for identification?


----------



## telracs

Barbiedull said:


> Scarlet, why are we all so confused?


Because it's fun? Or maybe because misery loves company?


Barbiedull said:


> If Scarlet had a drivers license, wouldn't she be identified since we use it for identification?


But what if that's NOT what I use for ID?


----------



## Barbiedull

scarlet said:


> Because it's fun? Or maybe because misery loves company?


Since I'm an optimist, can I opt for the fun part?


----------



## telracs

But if you keep misery company, maybe you could turn him into an optimist?


----------



## Barbiedull

scarlet said:


> But if you keep misery company, maybe you could turn him into an optimist?


 Then misery would no longer exist?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

Are you optimistically pessimistic, or pessimistically optimistic?


----------



## Susan in VA

Can I be glass-half-full-istic?


----------



## Barbiedull

Valmore Daniels said:


> Are you optimistically pessimistic, or pessimistically optimistic?


I think I am neither?


----------



## lonestar

Why is it so hard to make these decisions?


----------



## Tip10

Barbiedull said:


> Then misery would no longer exist?


Isn't misery the state I work in?



Spoiler



I work in Saint Louis!


----------



## lonestar

Saint Louis hasn't become a state, has it?


----------



## Jeff

Isn't St. Louis blue?


----------



## Barbiedull

Jeff said:


> Isn't St. Louis blue?


Their state bird is a bluebird, but they name their baseball team The Cardinals?


Spoiler



Cardinal is the state bird of Illinois...and we have a rivalry between our Cubs and their Cardinals... Our Cubs wear blue. It sure seems like we're all mixed up!


----------



## Jeff

Isn't the hockey team called the St. Louis Blues?


----------



## Barbiedull

Jeff said:


> Isn't the hockey team called the St. Louis Blues?


Yes it is. Maybe they're depressed about living there?


----------



## telracs

maybe it's the music, not the color?


----------



## Barbiedull

scarlet said:


> maybe it's the music, not the color?


How is that possible? Chicago is home of the Blues?


----------



## Jeff

Didn't the Southland take a new note and push it through a horn until it was worn into a blue note?


----------



## Barbiedull

Jeff said:


> Didn't the Southland take a new note and push it through a horn until it was worn into a blue note?





Spoiler



That's enough to give an optimist the blues! 


 I hope everyone knows I'm just having fun?


Spoiler



I don't dislike St. Louis, Frank Sinatra, or even NY style pizza...


----------



## telracs

Isn't Memphis the home of the blues?


----------



## Barbiedull

scarlet said:


> Isn't Memphis the home of the blues?


 I guess it depends who you ask?



Spoiler



Chicago blues is a little different. I'm a big Blues fan, I listen to all of it.


----------



## geoffthomas

Didn't I hear that the Delta birthed the blues?


----------



## Barbiedull

geoffthomas said:


> Didn't I hear that the Delta birthed the blues?


Did the baby move to Chicago?


----------



## Susan in VA

Barbiedull said:


> Did the baby move to Chicago?


Would it have used a U-Crawl?



Spoiler



Sorry.


----------



## Jeff

Where did they nurse it, rehearse it and give out the news?


----------



## Brenda Carroll

Say what? Doesn't the blues live in our hearts?


----------



## telracs

Brendan Carroll said:


> Say what? Doesn't the blues live in our hearts?


Or in our souls?


----------



## Barbiedull

Brendan Carroll said:


> Say what? Doesn't the blues live in our hearts?





scarlet said:


> Or in our souls?


 All of the above?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

How much does your soul weigh?


----------



## Jeff

Doesn't that depend upon your behavior?


----------



## caracara

Or does it depend on who is holding the scales?


----------



## Susan in VA

And what if it's raining?  Wouldn't a waterlogged one weigh more?


----------



## Barbiedull

Cobbie said:


> Which is better - a light or a heavy soul?
> 
> 
> 
> Spoiler
> 
> 
> 
> I will claim whichever is the better one.


It seems like a heavy soul would be a burden. How could you carry it around without a body?


Spoiler



I vote for light as a feather.


----------



## Jeff

Didn't you see the load that Marley's ghost had to haul?


----------



## Barbiedull

Jeff said:


> Didn't you see the load that Marley's ghost had to haul?


I wouldn't want to be wrapped in heavy chains and loaded down with things to carry, would you?


----------



## Jeff

Are you gonna be good?


----------



## Tip10

Isn't good a matter of perspective?


----------



## lonestar

Good at what?


----------



## Barbiedull

Jeff said:


> Are you gonna be good?


Why would I not be?


Spoiler



Santa would find out if I'm not!


----------



## Jeff

Is "naughty and nice" an oxymoron or wishful thinking?


----------



## Maryn

_*"So, do you like your hair like that?"*_

There are some questions you're just not sure have a right answer


----------



## Jeff

Do you think I'm stupid enough to answer that?


----------



## Jeff

Anyone else want to answer that?


----------



## lonestar

What was the question?


----------



## Susan in VA

Weren't you paying attention either?


----------



## telracs

saturday night chat anyone?


----------



## lonestar

Isn't it Monday night?


----------



## Susan in VA

Lonestar, have you been snoozing for the past two days?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

Is the coffee ready yet?


----------



## loonlover

No, isn't it your turn to make it?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

Has Juan come by with the coffee beans?


----------



## lonestar

Who has the coffee?


----------



## Jasmine Giacomo Author

Can I get fries with that?


----------



## telracs

Jasmine Giacomo said:


> Can I get fries with that?


Would you like to supersize that?


----------



## Tip10

scarlet said:


> Would you like to supersize that?


The coffee or the fries?


----------



## Jeff

Can I switch those fries to hash browns and super-size the coffee, please?


----------



## Tip10

Can that coffee be supplied IV?


----------



## caracara

Can I switch the coffee to hot chocolate, with marshmallows?


----------



## caracara

If Pinocchio said "My nose is going to grow" would he be telling the truth, or a lie?


----------



## Jeff

Wouldn't his nose size answer that question?


----------



## Alle Meine Entchen

caracara said:


> Can I switch the coffee to hot chocolate, with marshmallows?


Don't you have a hot chocolate machine?



Spoiler



I do


----------



## Tip10

caracara said:


> Can I switch the coffee to hot chocolate, with marshmallows?


Don't the marshmallows get stuck in the IV tubes?


----------



## telracs

Didn't you see the "No substitutions" sign?


----------



## Jasmine Giacomo Author

Is that guy supposed to be taking down that "No Substitutions" sign and substituting a "No Parking" sign there?


----------



## Brenda Carroll

Is that what happened to my No Parking sign?


----------



## klenart

Is this thread really just about asking random questions?


----------



## klenart

The question OR the no parking sign?


----------



## BTackitt

Does anyone other than Brendan Carroll actually like FRUIT CAKE?


----------



## Barbiedull

Cobbie said:


> Are Brendan and I the _only_ ones who like "FRUIT CAKE"?


I like fruit cake, do you have some?


----------



## Jeff

Cobbie said:


> Are Brendan and I the _only_ ones who like "FRUIT CAKE"?


Has anyone noticed that Brendan is nutty as a fruit cake?


----------



## telracs

if there are nuts in a fruit cake, are there fruits in a nut cake?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

When the bough breaks, will the cradle really fall?


----------



## telracs

why is the cradle up the tree?


----------



## lonestar

Did you see that?


----------



## geoffthomas

What did YOU see?


----------



## Barbiedull

scarlet said:


> why is the cradle up the tree?


Do you think the Mother was a birdbrain?


----------



## Tip10

If Ignorance is Bliss why aren't more people happy?


----------



## geoffthomas

You aren't happy?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

What is happy?


----------



## telracs

Cobbie said:


> Isn't the slogan 'If Mama ain't happy, ain't nobody happy" true?


Doesn't that depend on Mama?


----------



## Jeff

I think it's "when you're good to Mama, Mama's good to you", isn't it?


----------



## telracs

Jeff said:


> I think it's "when you're good to Mama, Mama's good to you", isn't it?


Again, doesn't that depend on Mama?



Spoiler



and actually, both sayings exist.


----------



## Tip10

If Mama's happy is she good to Papa?


----------



## telracs

Tip10 said:


> If Mama's happy is she good to Papa?


Doesn't that depend on Papa?


----------



## caracara

Does it matter as long as mama puts dinner on the table? =)


----------



## telracs

caracara said:


> Does it matter as long as mama puts dinner on the table? =)


And just who is paying for that dinner?


----------



## Barbiedull

caracara said:


> Does it matter as long as mama puts dinner on the table? =)





Spoiler



Of course it matters!


 Shouldn't mama be happy too?


----------



## caracara

scarlet said:


> And just who is paying for that dinner?


I would not be paying, so why would I care? hehe


----------



## vwkitten

Shouldn't we all care a little more about making Mama happy?


----------



## Brenda Carroll

What about Daddy?


----------



## Tip10

caracara said:


> Does it matter as long as mama puts dinner on the table? =)


Who says Mama puts dinner on the table? 


Spoiler



Around here Daddy does that!


----------



## telracs

why can't i stop sneezing?


----------



## lonestar

Is it the cat?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

When is it not the cat?


----------



## Tip10

Why does everybody blame it on the cat?

Hey Scarlet


Spoiler



Go check out the shirt on shirt woot today. http://shirt.woot.com/


----------



## lonestar

Where IS the cat?


----------



## caracara

Not where he's suppose to be?


----------



## lonestar

What happened to all the chocolate in this house?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

What chocolate?


----------



## Barbiedull

lonestar said:


> What happened to all the chocolate in this house?


Is it no longer in the house? Was it taken by someone in a ufo?


----------



## telracs

Tip10 said:


> Why does everybody blame it on the cat?
> 
> Hey Scarlet
> 
> 
> Spoiler
> 
> 
> 
> Go check out the shirt on shirt woot today. http://shirt.woot.com/


Darn, why didn't I check this thread on Friday?

Tip10


Spoiler



what was the shirt?


----------



## tsilver

Do the royals fart?


----------



## vwkitten

Would anyone really admit that the royals fart?


----------



## Tip10

scarlet said:


> Darn, why didn't I check this thread on Friday?
> 
> Tip10
> 
> 
> Spoiler
> 
> 
> 
> what was the shirt?


Would you like to know?



Spoiler



Okay so now that we have the question in, follow the link I gave and then click on community on the top right part of the screen -- you can look at past days shirts that way. Dec 10th's is the one you wanna look at.


----------



## telracs

can you hear me laughing?


----------



## telracs

Chat?


----------



## Barbiedull

If the witch is dead can we take the ding dongs?


----------



## telracs

Barbiedull said:


> If the witch is dead can we take the ding dongs?


Instead of the shoes?

And you gonna join me in chat?


----------



## Barbiedull

scarlet said:


> Instead of the shoes?
> 
> And you gonna join me in chat?





Spoiler



I'd take the shoes too! It's bathtime for me right now. I've been cleaning my aquariums all day....


----------



## telracs

If we move the ding dongs, can we save the witch?


----------



## vwkitten

Did anyone save me a ding dong?


----------



## lonestar

Are they chocolate?


----------



## Susan in VA

Jeff said:


> Has anyone noticed that Brendan is nutty as a fruit cake?


Doesn't that just make him fit in nicely here at KB?


----------



## Jeff

Isn't that what I said?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

What's for breakfast?


----------



## drenee

Does anyone want to go to Ihop?


----------



## Barbiedull

scarlet said:


> If we move the ding dongs, can we save the witch?


Would we want to save her?


----------



## lonestar

Can we have the chocolate ding dongs for breakfast?


----------



## Barbiedull

lonestar said:


> Can we have the chocolate ding dongs for breakfast?


I hope you've eaten them?


----------



## lonestar

Isn't this the chocolate thread?


----------



## telracs

Doesn't every thread where I post eventually become the chocolate thread?


Barbiedull said:


> Would we want to save her?


Because she's green?


----------



## Barbiedull

scarlet said:


> Because she's green?


Maybe she ate my cooking?


----------



## CathyQuinn

Barbiedull said:


> Maybe she ate my cooking?


The poisoned gingerbread house, you mean?


----------



## geoffthomas

Where ARE Hansel and Gretel?


----------



## telracs

Why would anyone want to play football in 2 degree weather?


----------



## crebel

Why would anyone want to attend a football game in 2 degree weather?


----------



## telracs

Why can't they move the game somewhere warmer?


----------



## geoffthomas

Isn't there something better to do?


----------



## Tip10

Do they have American Football stadiums in Tahiti?


----------



## telracs

Tip10 said:


> Do they have American Football stadiums in Tahiti?


Why would they want to?


----------



## lonestar

Who forgot to bring the ziplocs?


----------



## vwkitten

Are there enough ziploc baggies to hold all the fudge?


----------



## Jeff

Do we have to take our Kindles out of the baggies?


----------



## Ann in Arlington

Don't you realize that "ziplock baggies" is a bit of an oxymoron, "Ziploc" and "baggies" both being trademarked names for what are, in fact, competing products?


----------



## Barbiedull

vwkitten said:


> Are there enough ziploc baggies to hold all the fudge?


Wouldn't they all be empty soon?


----------



## Jeff

Ann in Arlington said:


> Don't you realize that "ziplock baggies" is a bit of an oxymoron, "Ziploc" and "baggies" both being trademarked names for what are, in fact, competing products?


Did you skip your morning caffeinated beverage?


----------



## Tip10

If we eat all the fudge won't we need bigger baggies?


----------



## Barbiedull

Tip10 said:


> If we eat all the fudge won't we need bigger baggies?


I think we would need bigger clothes?


----------



## caracara

Barbiedull said:


> I think we would need bigger clothes?


Is this why people are playing football in 2 degree weather? Did they eat all the fudge?


----------



## telracs

Ann in Arlington said:


> Don't you realize that "ziplock baggies" is a bit of an oxymoron, "Ziploc" and "baggies" both being trademarked names for what are, in fact, competing products?


Wouldn't that be a reduncancy, not an oxymoron?


----------



## Tip10

caracara said:


> Is this why people are playing football in 2 degree weather? Did they eat all the fudge?


Are there enough calories in fudge to keep you warm in 2 degree weather?


----------



## Barbiedull

Tip10 said:


> Are there enough calories in fudge to keep you warm in 2 degree weather?


 Do you need some hot chocolate to help warm you up?


----------



## telracs

Have you heard my new title?



Spoiler



Super Ninny Poopy Pants


----------



## Barbiedull

scarlet said:


> Have you heard my new title?
> 
> 
> 
> Spoiler
> 
> 
> 
> Super Ninny Poopy Pants


Who gave you that title?

I hope it isn't true?


----------



## telracs

Barbiedull said:


> Who gave you that title?


Maybe you should investigate?


----------



## crebel

Isn't Scarlet's new title supposed to be in a fun color and interesting font?



Spoiler



Super Ninny Poopy-Pants?


----------



## telracs

crebel said:


> Isn't Scarlet's new title supposed to be in a fun color and interesting font?
> 
> 
> 
> Spoiler
> 
> 
> 
> Super Ninny Poopy-Pants?


Were you trying for this effect?




Spoiler



Super





Spoiler






Spoiler



Ninny





Spoiler






Spoiler



Poopy-





Spoiler






Spoiler



Pants





Spoiler






Spoiler



?


----------



## crebel

Why do the four different colors and fonts I used show up on my screen in FRONT of the spoiler blackout?


----------



## telracs

crebel said:


> Why do the four different colors and fonts I used show up on my screen in FRONT of the spoiler blackout?


Because you have to have the color tags outside the spoiler tag info?



Spoiler



at least that's how it's work for me.


----------



## Susan in VA

Ann in Arlington said:


> Don't you realize that "ziplock baggies" is a bit of an oxymoron, "Ziploc" and "baggies" both being trademarked names for what are, in fact, competing products?


Why aren't you an attorney?


----------



## vwkitten

scarlet said:


> Wouldn't that be a reduncancy, not an oxymoron?


Wouldn't you rather be redundant with fudge?


----------



## telracs

vwkitten said:


> Wouldn't you rather be redundant with fudge?


What flavor fudge?


----------



## Jeff

Does anyone understand Trish's post on the Birds of a Feather thread?


----------



## vwkitten

What?  Didn't you see the word reception in the previous picture?


----------



## Jeff

Did I ever claim that I could read?


----------



## JPStarr

Am I supposed to understand all this?


----------



## Barbiedull

JPStarr said:


> Am I supposed to understand all this?


Does anyone understand all this?


----------



## Jeff

What's to understand?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

Did you know my "Santa's Tropical Vacation" door theme won 3rd place in our work's door contest?


----------



## telracs

mom133d said:


> Did you know my "Santa's Tropical Vacation" door theme won 3rd place in our work's door contest?


Can we see a picture of it?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

scarlet said:


> Can we see a picture of it?





Spoiler



http://www.kboards.com/index.php/topic,45678.0.html I'll pictures of the dept who blantantly stole my idea as well - and spelled Buffett wrong! as soon as they get uploaded



Why did they schedule an award ceremony after the holiday party?


----------



## lonestar

Can you whistle?


----------



## Jeff

If I can't whistle can I yell Jiminy Cricket?


----------



## telracs

Many people can leave a band and yet someone still uses the original band name?


----------



## lonestar

Which band?


----------



## Alle Meine Entchen

Cobbie said:


> Spoiler
> 
> 
> 
> I just bought my first of the season fruitcake to share with
> 
> 
> Brendan.
> 
> Are the rest of you jealous?


why should we be jealous over fruitcake?


----------



## egh34

Can I open just one present now?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

Why would want to do that?


----------



## Tip10

What if you only have one present?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

Why not wait until the 21st and call it a Yule present?


----------



## drenee

Why does my living room look like Christmas threw up?


----------



## telracs

What if you didn't get any presents?


----------



## lonestar

No presents?


----------



## Jeff

Will you please put a penny in the old man's hat?


----------



## telracs

What does a penny buy this day?


----------



## Jeff

If you haven't got a penny a ha'penny will do. Do you have a ha'penny?


----------



## Tip10

Isn't it still a penny for your thoughts?


----------



## Jeff

Would a half-whit charge a ha'penny?


----------



## lonestar

Why?


----------



## lonestar

Is it okay to eat the PayDay candy bar that is supposed to go in the Christmas stocking?


----------



## Alle Meine Entchen

lonestar said:


> Is it okay to eat the PayDay candy bar that is supposed to go in the Christmas stocking?


Is it Christmas yet? Do you think Santa will put you on the "naughty" list if you do?


----------



## telracs

How is anyone going to know that it was "supposed" to go in the stocking? 

Maybe it was "supposed" to go in your tummy?


----------



## vidhya.t

Have I been good mom?


----------



## Tip10

vidhya.t said:


> Have I been good mom?


Do you have good kids?


----------



## vidhya.t

Tip10 said:


> Do you have good kids?


Ha ha, Just saw this. I meant "Have I been good, mom?"

Missed out the comma.


----------



## Barbiedull

Cobbie said:


> Why does my laundry/wrap room look like Christmas threw up?


Why does my living room look like that on Christmas morning?


Spoiler



The kids unwrap and run!


----------



## telracs

Should we give Christmas some pepto to stop throwing up?


----------



## geoffthomas

Eat too many cookies?


----------



## lonestar

What the heck is on my glasses?


----------



## Jeff

I hope whatever is on your glasses has no relation to the previous posts.


----------



## telracs

why does my computer always take forever to recognize my camera?


----------



## Jeff

Prosopamnesia?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

Could we get by without computers?


----------



## Tip10

scarlet said:


> why does my computer always take forever to recognize my camera?


Have you ever formally introduced them?


Spoiler



Seriously, are you using specific drivers you loaded for the camera or are you relying on Windows to find it and use what it thinks best? Might check the camera manu's website to see if they have specific or updated drivers.


----------



## telracs

Jeff said:


> Prosopamnesia?


huh?

@Tip10-


Spoiler



it's a mac, so it's not windows. The computer is picky about the order in which I do things and I always have to experiment (open iPhoto first then mount the camera or mount the camera first then open iPhoto). Also, there's a large number of pictures on the camera, so it takes a minute to load and I just am too impatient sometimes.



Did you see my latest photos in the photo thread?


----------



## Jeff

scarlet said:


> Did you see my latest photos in the photo thread?


Why don't you ever post a link?


----------



## telracs

Because I only have one window open?


----------



## Barbiedull

scarlet said:


> Because I only have one window open?


Isn't it too cold to open a window?


Spoiler



I have a pc...I have 8 windows open!


----------



## lonestar

Did Santa get here yet?


----------



## telracs

why has this thread died?

did people get all the answers and not tell me?

and


Spoiler



why can't my super do his job?


----------



## lonestar

Were there answers on here?


----------



## egh34

Can I return this?


----------



## Barbiedull

lonestar said:


> Were there answers on here?


Where is the random answer thread?


----------



## Susan in VA

Barbiedull said:


> Where is the random answer thread?


Aren't we supposed to be making up our own?


----------



## Jeff

Answers? Why do we need answers?


----------



## Susan in VA

Are there really any answers to the questions that matter?


----------



## lonestar

Is that answers that matter or questions that matter?


----------



## Jeff

What was the question again?


----------



## Susan in VA

I meant questions that matter.  But maybe it's both?


----------



## Barbiedull

If I knew the answers, why would I ask the questions?


----------



## Susan in VA

Do you know the answer to what on earth I'm going to make for dinner?


Spoiler



It's 5 PM and I have no idea... fridge full of leftovers and I'm tired of them.


----------



## Barbiedull

Susan in VA said:


> Do you know the answer to what on earth I'm going to make for dinner?
> 
> 
> Spoiler
> 
> 
> 
> It's 5 PM and I have no idea... fridge full of leftovers and I'm tired of them.


 Order a pizza?


----------



## Vegas_Asian

Why do I give an item away and then need it!?


----------



## telracs

Susan in VA said:


> Do you know the answer to what on earth I'm going to make for dinner?
> 
> 
> Spoiler
> 
> 
> 
> It's 5 PM and I have no idea... fridge full of leftovers and I'm tired of them.


Order Chinese?


----------



## Susan in VA

Maybe pizza for DD and her dad, and Chinese for me...?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

Did you eat too much turkey over the holidays?


----------



## telracs

Valmore Daniels said:


> Did you eat too much turkey over the holidays?


Is there such a thing as too much turkey?


----------



## Barbiedull

Susan in VA said:


> Maybe pizza for DD and her dad, and Chinese for me...?


 Sounds like a plan?


----------



## caracara

Did I miss the part of the plan that involves chocolate?


----------



## Barbiedull

caracara said:


> Did I miss the part of the plan that involves chocolate?


Are we there yet?


----------



## Brenda Carroll

Is caramel popcorn good for you?


----------



## lonestar

Is any plan good without chocolate?


----------



## caracara

Why wouldn't caramel popcorn be good for you? It's corn isn't it?


----------



## lonestar

Are you saying that caramel popcorn ISN"T good for us?


----------



## The Hooded Claw

I'm not sure Faith Popcorn is good for us.


----------



## Jeff

What was the question?


----------



## lonestar

Do you believe in magic?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

In a young girl's eyes?


----------



## libbyfh

Why did I say that?


----------



## Jeff

Is there a rule against asking the same question?


----------



## telracs

Jeff said:


> Is there a rule against asking the same question?


Are there any rules?


----------



## Jeff

Have you asked Cobbie?


----------



## telracs

Jeff said:


> Have you asked Cobbie?


Why would I?


----------



## Jeff

Wasn't it Cobbie who questioned the question that was allegedly a repeated question?


----------



## Barbiedull

scarlet said:


> Are there any rules?


Is Cobbie making random rules?


----------



## Jeff

I'm not butting heads with Cobbie, are you?


----------



## Barbiedull

Jeff said:


> I'm not butting heads with Cobbie, are you?


Heck no, everyone loves Cobbie! Didn't you know?


----------



## Jeff

Is it love or fear?


----------



## The Hooded Claw

Did you light them with a match?


----------



## telracs

Cobbie said:


> Is this why my ears have been burning?


are you having trouble inserting photos?


----------



## Barbiedull

Jeff said:


> Is it love or fear?


Fear Cobbie?


Spoiler



She's nice!


----------



## lonestar

Can we all just get along?


----------



## Susan in VA

Cobbie, are they picking on you?


----------



## Susan in VA

Cobbie, didn't you know that this thread is the dark alley of KindleBoards?  Where you can be stalked mercilessly and have your words twisted to unrecognizable nonsense?  Where even the Voice of Reason (aka Jeff)  gets so confused by the total anarchy that he repeats himself?


----------



## Jeff

Et tu, Susan?


----------



## Susan in VA

Cobbie said:


> Susan, do you know how hilarious you are? Do you also know that you've given me such a laugh that my husband, who is sleeping upstairs, will probably ask me in the morning what made me laugh so loudly that I woke him?


Oh dear. Can I blame the Martini I had this evening?


----------



## Susan in VA

Jeff said:


> Et tu, Susan?


What, you didn't like being called the Voice of Reason? <flutters eyelashes innocently>


----------



## egh34

Susan in VA said:


> Oh dear. Can I blame the Martini I had this evening?


Just one?


----------



## telracs

If Jeff is the voice of reason, what am I?


----------



## Barbiedull

scarlet said:


> If Jeff is the voice of reason, what am I?


Is the voice of reason always reasonable? Why does it sometimes not talk to you until AFTER you do something stupid?
Is my voice of reason on a delay?


----------



## telracs

Is it really a voice of reason if it doesn't speak up in time?


----------



## Barbiedull

scarlet said:


> Is it really a voice of reason if it doesn't speak up in time?


 Better late than never?


Spoiler



So we can return the things we shouldn't have bought!


----------



## Susan in VA

egh34 said:


> Just one?


Would I have driven home if I'd had more than one?


Spoiler



NO. Never. One's my limit; I very very rarely have more than that and only if a) someone else is driving and b) I'm with someone I trust completely to get me home safely.


----------



## Susan in VA

Barbiedull said:


> Is my voice of reason on a delay?


I think mine is sometimes in another time zone...


----------



## telracs

Susan in VA said:


> I think mine is sometimes in another time zone...


Is it?


----------



## Tip10

Why is my voice of reason so unreasonable?


----------



## lonestar

Does everyone HAVE a voice of reason?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

Are you ready to rock and roll tonight?


----------



## lonestar

Are you?


----------



## Kristen Painter

How do you know if you're not?


----------



## lonestar

How long is your resolution list?


----------



## telracs

lonestar said:


> How long is your resolution list?


What's a resolution?


----------



## Susan in VA

lonestar said:


> How long is your resolution list?


Would you believe 11 items for 2011?


----------



## telracs

Susan in VA said:


> Would you believe 11 items for 2011?


Why wouldn't we?


----------



## geoffthomas

What have you resolved?


----------



## Jeff

Resolved not to ask questions - anyone else?


----------



## Barbiedull

Jeff said:


> Resolved not to ask questions - anyone else?


Isn't that a question?


----------



## Jeff

Wasn't funny, was it?


----------



## Barbiedull

Spoiler



Funnier than my jokes.


 Can I resolve to stay unresolved?


----------



## Jeff

Yes but can you stick to it for a whole year?


----------



## Barbiedull

Jeff said:


> Yes but can you stick to it for a whole year?


Can I answer that in 11 months?


----------



## Jeff

Can you remember the question for 11 months?


----------



## Barbiedull

Jeff said:


> Can you remember the question for 11 months?


I thought I needed to remember the ANSWER?


----------



## Jeff

Will you know the answer before the year is over?


----------



## Barbiedull

Jeff said:


> Will you know the answer before the year is over?


 Maybe I will be able to take a random guess?


----------



## geoffthomas

What is the next random word?


----------



## telracs

Swordfish?


----------



## Susan in VA

A particular swordfish, or any old random swordfish?



Spoiler



Cobbie, would "chocolate" really be _random _for scarlet??


----------



## Jeff

Might I suggest chocolate swordfish?


----------



## Susan in VA

Jeff, wherever do you find these?  And so quickly too?


----------



## telracs

horsefeathers?

and why am I reminded of a certain monster in Warner Bros cartoons?


Spoiler



I will love him and keep him and call him George.


----------



## Jeff

Isn't that Lennie's line from _Of Mice and Men_?


----------



## lonestar

Minnie Mouse?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

Why so serious?


----------



## caracara

Serious? Who said anything about serious?


Spoiler



Seriously sarcastic maybe =)


----------



## lonestar

Who was serious?


----------



## telracs

I don't think I was, was I?


----------



## Tip10

Delirious??  Who's delirious??


----------



## lonestar

Is it time for dessert?


----------



## telracs

lonestar said:


> Is it time for dessert?


Isn't it always?


----------



## Tip10

Os so delicious then, not delirious?


----------



## geoffthomas

Have you eaten all the Christmas cookies yet?


----------



## telracs

geoffthomas said:


> Have you eaten all the Christmas cookies yet?


Cookies? We have cookies?


----------



## lonestar

What kind of cookies?


----------



## telracs

Milk and cookies?


----------



## lonestar

When do we start?


----------



## Barbiedull

lonestar said:


> When do we start?


 What are you starting?


----------



## telracs

why did i leave the jelly bellys at work?


----------



## caracara

Because you have milk and cookies at home?


----------



## lonestar

What kind of jelly beans?


----------



## caracara

Bertie Botts every flavor Jelly Beans?


----------



## telracs

caracara said:


> Bertie Botts every flavor Jelly Beans?


Yuck!

Have you ever tried jelly belly honey bean flavor?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

Do you like to sleep in?


----------



## telracs

Valmore Daniels said:


> Do you like to sleep in?


In what?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

Can you teach my 4 year old what sleep in means?


----------



## lonestar

Anyone have an Almond Joy?


----------



## caracara

How about a milkshake?


----------



## B-Kay 1325

Why do some people think that violence is the only answer?


----------



## geoffthomas

why do we not cherish loved ones until they are gone?


----------



## Barbiedull

Cobbie said:


> How long will I remain a January slug?
> 
> 
> 
> Spoiler
> 
> 
> 
> I like it.


Until February?


----------



## telracs

Barbiedull said:


> Until February?


Until Spring?


----------



## Susan in VA

Am I a bad mom for wearing earplugs when my Kiddo is practicing the recorder?


----------



## telracs

Susan in VA said:


> Am I a bad mom for wearing earplugs when my Kiddo is practicing the recorder?


What you gonna do when she moves onto the violin?


----------



## Susan in VA

scarlet said:


> What you gonna do when she moves onto the violin?


Isn't that what her dad's house is for?


----------



## telracs

Susan in VA said:


> Isn't that what her dad's house is for?


did you tell HIM that?


----------



## Susan in VA

Would I need to tell someone that who has drums, electric guitars, and several keyboards in his living room?


----------



## lonestar

Why didn't I buy any chocolate when I was at the store today?  Why?


----------



## caracara

Because you wanted to go back today for some?


----------



## Barbiedull

lonestar said:


> Why didn't I buy any chocolate when I was at the store today? Why?


Because you didn't want to contribute to the cocoa shortage?


----------



## Tip10

lonestar said:


> Why didn't I buy any chocolate when I was at the store today? Why?


Temporary insanity?


----------



## telracs

Who would be stupid enough to make a left turn from the right lane when there is oncoming traffic and ice on the road?

And does that woman know how silly she looks with a cigarette in one hand and her asthma inhaler in the other?


----------



## Tip10

scarlet said:


> Who would be stupid enough to make a left turn from the right lane when there is oncoming traffic and ice on the road?
> 
> And does that woman know how silly she looks with a cigarette in one hand and her asthma inhaler in the other?


Is the person in the first part the same person in the second part? If so then isn't the question already answered?


----------



## telracs

Should I rephrase the second question to make it clearer that they are NOT the same person?


----------



## lonestar

How did you get that answer?


----------



## Susan in VA

scarlet said:


> And does that woman know how silly she looks with a cigarette in one hand and her asthma inhaler in the other?


D'you suppose she's the same person who was in the checkout line ahead of me buying donuts, Twinkies, and _diet_ coke?


----------



## Brenda Carroll

Susan in VA said:


> D'you suppose she's the same person who was in the checkout line ahead of me buying donuts, Twinkies, and _diet_ coke?





Spoiler



That was no lady, Miss Susan! That was me!


What is worse than a diet coke with vanilla icecream in it?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

Who would win in a fight between Rocky and Chuck Norris?


----------



## telracs

Brendan Carroll said:


> Spoiler
> 
> 
> 
> That was no lady, Miss Susan! That was me!
> 
> 
> What is worse than a diet coke with vanilla icecream in it?


Diet Root Beer and low fat vanilla ice cream?


----------



## Susan in VA

Diet Sprite and coffee ice cream in it?


----------



## lonestar

How many pairs of scissors do you have?


----------



## telracs

Susan in VA said:


> Diet Sprite and coffee ice cream in it?


Can you hear me gagging all the way down there?


----------



## Susan in VA

Disgusting thought, isn't it?


----------



## Barbiedull

lonestar said:


> How many pairs of scissors do you have?


How many pairs actually _cut_?


Spoiler



Some of mine need to be thrown out...


----------



## crebel

My DD celebrated her 30th birthday today, why does that make ME feel old?


----------



## Susan in VA

Didn't you teach her that she's supposed to stop counting at 29?


----------



## crebel

Susan in VA said:


> Didn't you teach her that she's supposed to stop counting at 29?


Apparently not, does that make me an old failure?


----------



## lonestar

Susan in VA said:


> Didn't you teach her that she's supposed to stop counting at 29?


Isn't that when we all stop counting?


Spoiler



I know I did.


----------



## egh34

Why?


----------



## Brenda Carroll

Race me to the corner?


----------



## Meredith Sinclair

See you at noon then?


----------



## Jeff

Is this a private party?


----------



## telracs

Jeff said:


> Is this a private party?


did your invitation get lost in the mail?


----------



## Jeff

Do you suppose I left it in Susan's re-mailed book?


----------



## lonestar

Why do these vitamins smell so bad?


----------



## Susan in VA

Jeff said:


> Do you suppose I left it in Susan's re-mailed book?


Do you suppose the post office will figure out that I really exist this time?


----------



## Jeff

Susan in VA said:


> Do you suppose the post office will figure out that I really exist this time?


Have you considered the possibility that they're right?



Spoiler



If, in the opinion of the USPS, you truly exist, you should get the new package with the old one inside on Tuesday.


----------



## Susan in VA

Jeff said:


> Have you considered the possibility that they're right?


The first time  , or the second time?

(And thank you.)


----------



## Jeff

Susan in VA said:


> The first time  , or the second time?


Don't we have to wait and see?


----------



## Susan in VA

Jeff said:


> Don't we have to wait and see?


If you think they were right the first time, does that mean you're talking to a figment of your imagination?


----------



## telracs

why are we still awake?


----------



## Susan in VA

scarlet said:


> why are we still awake?


because I got caught up in the lengthy train-wreck you mentioned?


----------



## Jeff

Susan in VA said:


> If you think they were right the first time, does that mean you're talking to a figment of your imagination?


Didn't you know that I have a great imagination?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

If ghosts can walk through walls and glide down stairs, why don't they fall through the floor?


----------



## Barbiedull

Valmore Daniels said:


> If ghosts can walk through walls and glide down stairs, why don't they fall through the floor?


How do you know they don't?


----------



## telracs

Valmore Daniels said:


> If ghosts can walk through walls and glide down stairs, why don't they fall through the floor?


And how can they sit in chairs without sinking?


----------



## Susan in VA

Jeff said:


> Didn't you know that I have a great imagination?


Yes, but do you think I really want to be a _product_ of it?


----------



## telracs

Susan in VA said:


> Yes, but do you think I really want to be a _product_ of it?


Whose imagination would you prefer to be a product of?


----------



## lonestar

Why am I so hungry?


----------



## Jeff

Are you just imagining being hungry?


----------



## caracara

Would it make a difference if they were imagining it or not, doesn't it come out to the same thing?


----------



## Jeff

caracara said:


> Would it make a difference if they were imagining it or not, doesn't it come out to the same thing?


Are we counting calories?


----------



## lonestar

I don't want to count calories, do you?


----------



## Tip10

I count calories.  Whoever gets the most wins, right?


----------



## telracs

How many theater tickets is too many?


----------



## caracara

Wouldn't it depend on how many people wanted to see the movie?


----------



## telracs

caracara said:


> Wouldn't it depend on how many people wanted to see the movie?


Who's talking about movies?


----------



## crebel

scarlet said:


> How many theater tickets is too many?


Did you get some more?


----------



## Brianna Lee McKenzie

Are we talking Broadway?


----------



## crebel

crebel said:


> Did you get some more?


Should I have read the "Bump" thread before asking that question?


----------



## telracs

crebel said:


> Did you get some more?


You know that weird things happen when we post at the same time?



Brianna Lee McKenzie said:


> Are we talking Broadway?


Aren't I always?


----------



## crebel

Do you know I have started calling my new kindle "F.B."?


----------



## telracs

crebel said:


> Do you know I have started calling my new kindle "F.B."?


F.B.?


----------



## crebel

Did you know the part of Saturday night chat I remember the most is "foot binding"?


----------



## telracs

Will we ever look at a bonsai the same again?


----------



## crebel

I think we have to give Susan credit for that, don't you?


----------



## telracs

crebel said:


> I think we have to give Susan credit for that, don't you?


Credit, or blame?


----------



## Susan in VA

I think I'll stay out of here until you figure that out...  don't you think that's best?


----------



## geoffthomas

Susan you can't stay away from posting, can you?


----------



## Susan in VA




----------



## Annalog

Why couldn't I find the terms Hachi-uye and Imperial bonsai earlier for bonsai large enough that 3 or 4 people are needed to move it? Would that only require toe binding?


----------



## telracs

Annalog said:


> Why couldn't I find the terms Hachi-uye and Imperial bonsai earlier for bonsai large enough that 3 or 4 people are needed to move it? Would that only require toe binding?


Wouldn't large things need MORE binding? So leg binding?


----------



## Annalog

Annalog said:


> Why couldn't I find the terms Hachi-uye and Imperial bonsai earlier for bonsai large enough that 3 or 4 people are needed to move it? Would that only require toe binding?





scarlet said:


> Wouldn't large things need MORE binding? So leg binding?


Aren't leg bindings also called puttees? Could that the source of "puttering around in the garden"?

Spell check suggested "Hatchet" for "Hachi-uye". Wouldn't that result in even smaller bonsai?


----------



## Brianna Lee McKenzie

Is there such a thing as a "mini" bonsai?


----------



## lonestar

Did you see the moon tonight?


----------



## Jeff

Didn't you hear me barking?


----------



## B-Kay 1325

Is that what that was?


----------



## Susan in VA

lonestar said:


> Did you see the moon tonight?


Pretty, isn't it?


----------



## geoffthomas

Yes it really was, wasn't it?


----------



## Barbiedull

Jeff said:


> Didn't you hear me barking?


 Were you on American Idol?


----------



## J.M Pierce

lonestar said:


> Did you see the moon tonight?


The moon over Kansas tonight is AMAZING!


----------



## Jeff

J.M. Pierce said:


> The moon over Kansas tonight is AMAZING!


Is there a different moon over Kansas?


----------



## Brianna Lee McKenzie

Are we still in Kansas, Toto?


----------



## loonlover

J.M. Pierce said:


> The moon over Kansas tonight is AMAZING!


Is it any more amazing than it is over Arkansas? Especially after the day of rain and snow we've had?


----------



## Ann in Arlington

I noticed this morning, from my back room, I could just see the sun coming up in the eastish and could still see the moon out the westish window through the bare trees.  Cool.


----------



## Susan in VA

^^^ And your _question_ would be....?


----------



## Annalog

Was it "How cool is that?" ?


----------



## Ann in Arlington

Sorry. . .got my random _statement_ tread confused with random _question_ thread.

So. . .sue me?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

Why is there a stinkbug in my office?


----------



## Susan in VA

Ann in Arlington said:


> Sorry. . .got my random _statement_ tread confused with random _question_ thread.
> 
> So. . .sue me?


No, _me_ Sue. You Ann.

Do you need more caffeine this morning?


----------



## Ann in Arlington

Caffeine?  . . . . . . . .there's an idea!


----------



## Valmore Daniels

What Cha' Gonna Do When They Come For You?


----------



## telracs

Valmore Daniels said:


> What Cha' Gonna Do When They Come For You?


Why are they coming for you?


----------



## Syria Says... AKA Celia Can Read

scarlet said:


> Why are they coming for you?


Because he ate the last cookie...? (I know I'd come huntin' for him!)


----------



## Susan in VA

Jeff said:


> Have you considered the possibility that they're right?
> 
> 
> 
> Spoiler
> 
> 
> 
> If, in the opinion of the USPS, you truly exist, you should get the new package with the old one inside on Tuesday.


It's Friday, and I got it today. Many thanks!!

Did you hear me all the way to Texas when I was at the post office to complain about their goof?



Spoiler



(Plain as day on the package: my correct address, perfectly legible, and unchanged for years -- and a post office sticker that says "unknown". Idiots.)


----------



## telracs

Syria Says... said:


> Because he ate the last cookie...? (I know I'd come huntin' for him!)


What kind of cookie?

Why is the MTA doing construction when it's going to be 19 degrees?


----------



## Jeff

Jeff said:


> ...you should get the new package with the old one inside on Tuesday.





Susan in VA said:


> It's Friday, and I got it today.


After considering the fact that Priority Mail took a month to never be delivered, do you think I was mistaken to have believed the postal clerk and chosen First Class?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

do you think USPS will ever understand why we chose to send things by other means?


----------



## Brianna Lee McKenzie

What can brown do for you?


----------



## telracs

who PUT the bop in the bop she bop she bop?


----------



## Susan in VA

Jeff said:


> After considering the fact that Priority Mail took a month to never be delivered, do you think I was mistaken to have believed the postal clerk and chosen First Class?


But why would that make a difference to the post office here in not finding me?



Spoiler



After the considerable fuss I made, I think they may be refunding the Priority Mail postage... they made copies of both envelopes and are currently "looking into the matter".


----------



## Jeff

Susan in VA said:


> But why would that make a difference to the post office here in not finding me?


Didn't you understand that my question was about my foolishly believing the promised Tuesday delivery date?


----------



## Susan in VA

Jeff said:


> Didn't you understand that my question was about my foolishly believing the promised Tuesday delivery date?


Ahh, I see. Maybe the clerk who told you that had forgotten that Monday was a holiday?


----------



## Jasmine Giacomo Author

Why DO fools fall in love?


----------



## Brianna Lee McKenzie

Does anyone shoot at Will when the Captain yells, "Shoot at will!"?


----------



## Jasmine Giacomo Author

Why can't I borrow The Doctor's TARDIS to go back in time and prevent FOX from cancelling _Firefly_?


----------



## Syria Says... AKA Celia Can Read

Why can't _I_ be the Moon Master?!


----------



## vwkitten

Why does a jack of all trades have to be a master of none?


----------



## Jasmine Giacomo Author

What if I DO know Jack?


----------



## Tip10

Anybody else watch WOOT?


Spoiler



Now that the question is outta the way -- Hey Scarlet -- shirt reckoning going on right now -- means you can run over and get the DING DONG the WITCH is DEAD T-Shirt for $12 plus shipping!!


----------



## Syria Says... AKA Celia Can Read

Why is there carrot in my cake?


----------



## telracs

Syria Says... said:


> Why is there carrot in my cake?


Because it's a carrot cake?

And does that shirt come with long sleeves?


----------



## Tip10

Alas no short sleeve only. 
Don't you support the right to bare arms?


----------



## Brianna Lee McKenzie

Does anyone know where I'm going?


----------



## TCLuvs2read

Why do we Park in a Driveway and Drive on a Parkway?


----------



## lonestar

Is this movie going to get any better?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

Does anyone know where I've been?


----------



## telracs

Valmore Daniels said:



> Does anyone know where I've been?


If you don't know, how am I supposed to?


----------



## vwkitten

Do you like the things that life is showing you?  Where are you going to?  Do you know?


----------



## Syria Says... AKA Celia Can Read

Is that a mirror in your pocket? 

Why would you carry a mirror in your pocket? Don't you know how dangerous that is if it were to break?!


----------



## TCLuvs2read

Are we there yet??


----------



## Brianna Lee McKenzie

Is it my turn to walk the dog?


----------



## telracs

Brianna Lee McKenzie said:


> Is it my turn to walk the dog?


is the dog scratching at the door?


----------



## lonestar

What is that in that bowl in the refrigerator?


----------



## Syria Says... AKA Celia Can Read

What's for breakfast?


----------



## Tip10

Whatever is in the bowl?


----------



## Alle Meine Entchen

am I as crazy as I think I am?


----------



## Jasmine Giacomo Author

Can I get a "booya"?


----------



## Syria Says... AKA Celia Can Read

Why do people always try to ruin the plots of great movies by telling me what happens even though I've stated I haven't actually watched the movie yet?


----------



## TCLuvs2read

Whose turn is it to wash dishes?


----------



## telracs

TCLuvs2read said:


> Whose turn is it to wash dishes?


who cooked?



Spoiler



it's the other person's turn.


----------



## loonlover

scarlet said:


> who cooked?
> 
> 
> 
> Spoiler
> 
> 
> 
> it's the other person's turn.


How come this rarely works at my house?


----------



## TCLuvs2read

What's on t.v. tonight?


----------



## crebel

Have we sufficiently rebuilt the exclamation point supply so that I may express proper exuberance in some posts?


----------



## telracs

crebel said:


> Have we sufficiently rebuilt the exclamation point supply so that I may express proper exuberance in some posts?


Why not try it and find out?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

TCLuvs2read said:


> What's on t.v. tonight?


Are you watching Practical Magic on ABC Family?

And why are ABC "Family" shows not really family friendly? Pretty Little Liars, really?


----------



## Tip10

scarlet said:


> who cooked?
> 
> 
> 
> Spoiler
> 
> 
> 
> it's the other person's turn.


I cook


Spoiler



most of the time


, I clean

She cooks


Spoiler



rarely, but occasionally


, I clean

Am I doing something wrong??


----------



## telracs

Maybe she thinks you like cleaning?


----------



## lonestar

Who here likes cleaning?


----------



## Susan in VA

Whoever it is, could they please come to my house?


----------



## Syria Says... AKA Celia Can Read

Is that MY voice?!


----------



## Valmore Daniels

Who ya gonna call?



Spoiler



Ghostbusters!


----------



## TCLuvs2read

Why? Yes, but Why? Why?


----------



## Susan Seeming

Why is the sky?


----------



## TCLuvs2read

Does the light in the refrigerator stay on all the time?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

Did you open the door to find out?


----------



## Syria Says... AKA Celia Can Read

Are you going to eat that?


----------



## cmg.sweet

Why do cheetos always taste better when you take them from someone else's plate?


----------



## Syria Says... AKA Celia Can Read

cmg.sweet said:


> Why do cheetos always taste better when you take them from someone else's plate?


And why do fries taste eleventybillion times better off of someone else's plate too?


----------



## telracs

who took my fries?


----------



## lonestar

Did you have to mention cheetos?


----------



## crebel

eleventybillion?


----------



## Syria Says... AKA Celia Can Read

Will someone go grocery shopping for me? Please?


----------



## caracara

Can I buy some chocolate with your grocery money?


----------



## telracs

Syria Says... said:


> Will someone go grocery shopping for me? Please?


will i get to keep the groceries?


----------



## Syria Says... AKA Celia Can Read

scarlet said:


> will i get to keep the groceries?


Will you at least COOK for me if I let you keep them?


----------



## telracs

Syria Says... said:


> Will you at least COOK for me if I let you keep them?


does your stove work?

and isn't it interesting that I wasn't the one asking for chocolate?


----------



## Syria Says... AKA Celia Can Read

scarlet said:


> does your stove work?
> 
> and isn't it interesting that I wasn't the one asking for chocolate?


How about take out instead?

And why weren't you?!


----------



## crebel

Syria Says... said:


> Will you at least COOK for me if I let you keep them?





scarlet said:


> does your stove work?


Do you know how to use it if it does?


----------



## Susan in VA

Syria Says... said:


> Will you at least COOK for me if I let you keep them?


You were asking_ scarlet _that question??  


Spoiler



Surely you jest.


----------



## lonestar

Can we fast forward to spring?


----------



## Syria Says... AKA Celia Can Read

Susan in VA said:


> You were asking_ scarlet _that question??
> 
> 
> Spoiler
> 
> 
> 
> Surely you jest.


Maaaaaaaybe?


----------



## telracs

T.L. Haddix said:


> Is doing laundry really all that important if I still have clean underwear somewhere?


Can you find it?


----------



## Tip10

T.L. Haddix said:


> Is doing laundry really all that important if I still have clean underwear somewhere?


Can you think of any other household chore where you work 2 minutes (load washer) read for 45 minutes, work 3 minutes (move clothes to dryer, reload washer) read for 45 minutes -- and then repeat?


----------



## telracs

Tip10 said:


> Can you think of any other household chore where you work 2 minutes (load washer) read for 45 minutes, work 3 minutes (move clothes to dryer, reload washer) read for 45 minutes -- and then repeat?


Do you have a washing machine in your home?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

Did you have your fill of coffee yet?


----------



## geoffthomas

You wash your clothes?


----------



## caracara

Aren't little fairies (aka Mom) suppose to wash all clothes?


----------



## Tip10

Cobbie said:


> No, but don't you have to interrupt your reading and actually _get up_ to accomplish this?


Can you walk and chew gum at the same time?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

Does your chewing gum lose its flavor on the bedpost overnight?


----------



## Annalog

When your mother says, "Don't chew it!" do you swallow it in fright?


----------



## crebel

Did your mother tell you it will take 14 years for gum to digest if you swallow it?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

Who put the filling in the pie in the sky?


----------



## geoffthomas

Why do we fall in love?


----------



## telracs

Valmore Daniels said:


> Who put the filling in the pie in the sky?


We have pie?


----------



## Tip10

scarlet said:


> We have pie?


Are you in the sky?


----------



## telracs

Tip10 said:


> Are you in the sky?


Have you not seen my avatar?


----------



## Tip10

scarlet said:


> Have you not seen my avatar?


Sure, I guess it begs the question -- How high in the sky is the pie?


----------



## BarbraAnnino

Now I want pie. Dammit.


----------



## geoffthomas

What kind of pie do you want?  (snicker)


----------



## Syria Says... AKA Celia Can Read

geoffthomas said:


> What kind of pie do you want? (snicker)


Do you have any?! Don't tease! Too cold for that!


----------



## Tip10

Doesn't that warm you up?


----------



## Brianna Lee McKenzie

Blueberry pie a la mode anyone?


----------



## lonestar

Do you like cream cheese pecan pie?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

Brianna Lee McKenzie said:


> Blueberry pie a la mode anyone?


Do I have my Lactaid?


----------



## Syria Says... AKA Celia Can Read

lonestar said:


> Do you like cream cheese pecan pie?


What is this glorious nector of the gods you speak of?!


----------



## lonestar

Syria Says... said:


> What is this glorious nector of the gods you speak of?!


Do you really want to know?


----------



## Syria Says... AKA Celia Can Read

lonestar said:


> Do you really want to know?


Should I be worried?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

Should we all be worried?


----------



## geoffthomas

What.....me worry?


----------



## lonestar

Was that a warning?


----------



## crebel

Wouldn't you rather go with Don't Worry, Be Happy?


----------



## Tip10

T.L. Haddix said:


> If we get worried, shouldn't there be chocolate?


Or do we get worried there won't be chocolate?


----------



## caracara

Should we find a chocolate pie?


----------



## telracs

Isn't there always chocolate?


----------



## Tip10

Doesn't that depend upon whether you ate all of it?


----------



## telracs

Cobbie said:


> How is it that every time I check this thread the subject is chocolate....and it usually involves Scarlet?


Just lucky?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Is it flammable or inflammable ?


----------



## Brianna Lee McKenzie

What does one put in a marquee?


----------



## telracs

Brianna Lee McKenzie said:


> What does one put in a marquee?


butter?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

What are a duck ??


----------



## caracara

Why do I love snow?



Spoiler



Because we get it once every 2 yrs, and means no school when it's on the roads


----------



## lonestar

Well, did anyone find the chocolate?


----------



## Jasmine Giacomo Author

Can I keep some of it in my tummy?


----------



## Syria Says... AKA Celia Can Read

Why must my vodka/o.j. empty?!


----------



## RichardDR

Why must I be a teenager in love?


----------



## geoffthomas

Who wrote the Book of Love?


----------



## Jeff

Do you wonder, wonder who?


----------



## lonestar

Whose pig is that?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

How do they know that there are no two snowflakes alike ??


----------



## telracs

NapCat said:


> How do they know that there are no two snowflakes alike ??


do identical twins have identical fingerprints?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

Can you step on the same piece of water twice?


----------



## geoffthomas

Is taffy made from salt-water?


----------



## lonestar

What happened?


----------



## loonlover

Is it spring yet?


----------



## telracs

chat tonight?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Y ?


----------



## *DrDLN* (dr.s.dhillon)

Why do we age!


----------



## Brianna Lee McKenzie

Which way is up?


----------



## caracara

scarlet said:


> do identical twins have identical fingerprints?


Are said identical twins actually identically down to the last freckle?


Spoiler



They can I think, but it rarely happens. The identical twins I know are mirror twins. Their finger prints are eerily similar, but not exact.


----------



## NapCat (retired)

I am an American with a Top Secret Security Clearance....why do I have to take my shoes off at the airport??


----------



## Susan in VA

NapCat said:


> I am an American with a Top Secret Security Clearance....why do I have to take my shoes off at the airport??


For the same reason my daughter had to when she was _five years old_?


----------



## *DrDLN* (dr.s.dhillon)

Cobbie said:


> Who ages?
> 
> 
> Spoiler
> 
> 
> 
> Certainly not us.


Every one ages from the time one is born, even before born.


----------



## Syria Says... AKA Celia Can Read

Why isn't my sweet tea from McDonald's endless?


----------



## telracs

drdln (dr s dhillon) said:


> Every one ages from the time one is born, even before born.


Doc, can you please post your responses in the form of a question?


----------



## Jasmine Giacomo Author

Who is Alex Trebek?


----------



## Syria Says... AKA Celia Can Read

Jasmine Giacomo said:


> Who is Alex Trebek?


Isn't he Canadian?


----------



## Brianna Lee McKenzie

Is it ever going to stop?


----------



## Barbiedull

T.L. Haddix said:


> Is it ever going to stop snowing?


How high can we pile the snow?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

What exactly are 100% natural flavors ?


----------



## Tip10

Barbiedull said:


> How high can we pile the snow?


Ever heard of June piles? I think we're approaching July piles?


----------



## telracs

monday night chat?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

How can people live like this


----------



## Valmore Daniels

Do you really want to know?


----------



## Susan in VA

Such trying times
Such trying times
Why do we live in such exasperating times?


----------



## Jeff

Susan in VA said:


> Such trying times
> Such trying times
> Why do we live in such exasperating times?


I hope this is just a random question; is it?


----------



## Susan in VA

Actually I was wondering how many people here would recognize it... and I figured _you_ probably would! So does your question mean I was wrong?


----------



## Jeff

I recognized the Marlene Dietrich lyrics; what am I missing?


----------



## Susan in VA

Okay, so then your question was just whether I had really had an exasperating day?  

Have you ever tried to plan a kids' birthday party for which the first priority (and an absolute requirement  ) is finding a date when all five guests can attend?


----------



## Jeff

Susan in VA said:


> Have you ever tried to plan a kids' birthday party for which the first priority (and an absolute requirement ) is finding a date when all five guests can attend?


Is it okay if I say that it's the kind of exasperation that becomes fun in retrospect?


----------



## Susan in VA

I'm sure it does. 

Eight years old, where did the time go??


----------



## JFHilborne

Why take Advil when nothing works better than Advil?


----------



## telracs

Chat?


----------



## Jeff

Are you being annoying?


----------



## caracara

Why am i still up? Why am I sitting on my comfy bed instead of snoring in it?


----------



## loonlover

scarlet said:


> Chat?


Guess I missed it?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Where are the kids??


----------



## tsilver

Is that your original nose?


----------



## telracs

Cobbie said:


> Do I ever have to stop my usual new year marathon reading?


why would you want to?


----------



## Tip10

Why is reading considered accomplishing very little?  
Sounds to me like you are accomplishing a great deal -- just not necessarily what others want you to -- so isn't the answer obvious?
If they want it done let them do it?


----------



## Syria Says... AKA Celia Can Read

Who wants to get me some hot chocolate?


----------



## Syria Says... AKA Celia Can Read

Cobbie said:


> Yes, aren't I lucky that no demands are placed on my time?
> 
> 
> 
> Spoiler
> 
> 
> 
> That is, until we need clean underwear or milk for cereal. And then it's gently asked.


May I gently ask for some hot chocolate then?


----------



## Brianna Lee McKenzie

If one is brainwashed does one still have a dirty mind?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Why did I eat "the whole thing' ??


----------



## Maud Muller

Can someone please explain why it's important to know _shit from Shinola?_


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Is this right?


----------



## Brianna Lee McKenzie

What is wrong?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

Who put that door there?


----------



## Susan in VA

Did you walk right into it?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

Eileen Muller said:


> Can someone please explain why it's important to know _sh** from Shinola?_


It is?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

When was the last time you really "dialed" a phone number?


----------



## telracs

did anyone else watch The Cape?


----------



## Susan in VA

NapCat said:


> When was the last time you really "dialed" a phone number?


Does anyone else here still own a dial phone?


----------



## Christopher Bunn

Do you walk to school or carry your lunch?


----------



## Tip10

Susan in VA said:


> Does anyone else here still own a dial phone?


Yes, three as a matter of fact, one on the kitchen wall (standard old black wall phone -- circa late 60's), and two in my office (fancy repro candlestick phone that's never used) and an old antique desk phone (circa early 1940's) that is not currently connected. 
Why doesn't anybody keep old stuff around anymore?


----------



## Susan in VA

Tip10 said:


> (fancy repro candlestick phone that's never used)


I wonder if that's from the same company as mine? 
(Mine's not the candlestick, but the really, really tacky silver Princess-y phone. What can I say... I used to work for someone who sold that company's repro products in Germany, and it was the demo model so I ended up with it.)

edit: oooh, here it is! http://www.worthpoint.com/worthopedia/ornate-takara-ihag-telephone-1976
Have you ever seen anything that tacky?


----------



## Tip10

No mine's more like this except it has an actual dial -- somebody got it for mom years and years ago and when she moved in with us for a bit before moving on to nursing home I inherited it.


It's not near as ugly is it? Ever try to use one of these one handed?


----------



## Susan in VA

We had those too...  of course as reproductions...  which themselves are now vintage!  Who oh why did people pay good money in the 70s to put one of those things on their desks?  Could there be anything more impractical?


----------



## Brianna Lee McKenzie

Remember when phones were on party lines?


----------



## caracara

How old are you people?


Spoiler



(Meant in the nicest possible way, my generation grew up with computers, not dial phones =) )


----------



## Brianna Lee McKenzie

Are we old enough to know better but young enough to not care?


----------



## loonlover

Aren't we old enough to not care?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

caracara said:


> How old are you people?
> 
> 
> Spoiler
> 
> 
> 
> (Meant in the nicest possible way, my generation grew up with computers, not dial phones =) )


Old enough to remember Steam Locomotives and President Truman ??

What an exciting time for "my generation" to live. I've watched us go from horse & buggy to the space station, from slate & chalk to the computer !!

"Your generation" may never have used a dial phone......but think what you will see in your lifetime !!! Be excited !! I am jealous...


----------



## Brianna Lee McKenzie

NapCat said:


> Old enough to remember Steam Locomotives and President Truman ??
> 
> What an exciting time for "my generation" to live. I've watched us go from horse & buggy to the space station, from slate & chalk to the computer !!
> 
> "Your generation" may never have used a dial phone......but think what you will see in your lifetime !!! Be excited !! I am jealous...


Can anyone top that?

the napcat wasn't caught napping!


----------



## Susan in VA

Whatever happened to those "Remember when" threads? Caracara might learn from be entertained by them...


----------



## Tip10

caracara said:


> How old are you people?
> 
> 
> Spoiler
> 
> 
> 
> (Meant in the nicest possible way, my generation grew up with computers, not dial phones =) )


How old am I??
My first "portable" PC didn't have a hard drive -- ran off of 2 - 720 KB (yes Kilobyte) floppies -- got it in my 20's
My first desktop PC had a whopping 5 MB (yes MegaByte) hard drive that I thought I'd never be able to fill up -- go it in my 20's too!
The computer you use today probably has far more in RAM than I had in the combined hard drives from my first 8 or 10 computers!
My first modem was a 300 baud modem. My first on-line network was Genie -- a completely text based network.
So How old do you think I am


Spoiler



Probably not near as old as you are likely to guess!!


----------



## Syria Says... AKA Celia Can Read

What's for breakfast?


----------



## Annalog

Tip10 said:


> How old am I??
> My first "portable" PC didn't have a hard drive -- ran off of 2 - 720 KB (yes Kilobyte) floppies -- got it in my 20's
> My first desktop PC had a whopping 5 MB (yes MegaByte) hard drive that I thought I'd never be able to fill up -- go it in my 20's too!
> The computer you use today probably has far more in RAM than I had in the combined hard drives from my first 8 or 10 computers!
> My first modem was a 300 baud modem. My first on-line network was Genie -- a completely text based network.
> So How old do you think I am
> 
> 
> Spoiler
> 
> 
> 
> Probably not near as old as you are likely to guess!!


Are you a few years younger than I am?


----------



## Barbiedull

Eileen Muller said:


> Can someone please explain why it's important to know _sh** from Shinola?_


 So you can pick which one you _want_ on your shoes?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

What's for dinner?


----------



## geoffthomas

Will you still care for me in the morning?


----------



## geoffthomas

Oh, you noticed I was gone?


----------



## Syria Says... AKA Celia Can Read

Did you at least leave me any cookies?


----------



## geoffthomas

Cookies.  We had cookies?


----------



## telracs

were they chocolate cookies?



Spoiler



if so, i ate them all.


----------



## Syria Says... AKA Celia Can Read

You ate all my cookies?


----------



## telracs

Syria Says... said:


> You ate all my cookies?


was there a sign on them saying they were yours?


----------



## JimC1946

Why would anyone go up a creek without a paddle?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Did you see THAT !??


----------



## Syria Says... AKA Celia Can Read

scarlet said:


> was there a sign on them saying they were yours?


*sniffle*

Would you have paid attention to it if there was one?


----------



## Susan in VA

JimC1946 said:


> Why would anyone go up a creek without a paddle?


More importantly, how did such an illogical saying even get started? 

I mean, if you're stuck UP the creek without a paddle, you could just let the current get you back to where you wanted to be. It's being stuck DOWN the creek without a paddle that would be difficult.


----------



## Brianna Lee McKenzie

Susan in VA said:


> More importantly, how did such an illogical saying even get started?
> 
> I mean, if you're stuck UP the creek without a paddle, you could just let the current get you back to where you wanted to be. It's being stuck DOWN the creek without a paddle that would be difficult.


Wouldn't a motor come in handy right about then?


----------



## tsilver

Why don't you try swimming?


----------



## tsilver

Oh, you already tried that?  Well take a nap.


----------



## telracs

Syria Says... said:


> *sniffle*
> 
> Would you have paid attention to it if there was one?


Do you honestly think I would have taken them if I knew they were yours?


----------



## Syria Says... AKA Celia Can Read

scarlet said:


> Do you honestly think I would have taken them if I knew they were yours?


Maybe?


----------



## telracs

Syria Says... said:


> Maybe?


don't have much faith in me, do you?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Window? or Isle?


----------



## Tip10

scarlet said:


> don't have much faith in me, do you?


Or, perhaps, lots of faith in you when it comes to chocolate!?


----------



## Syria Says... AKA Celia Can Read

scarlet said:


> don't have much faith in me, do you?


Can you really blame me?

(Coming from one chocoholic to another... I can understand WHY you ate the cookies...)


----------



## Valmore Daniels

Do you dream in technicolor?


----------



## telracs

NapCat said:


> Window? or Isle?


Isle? or Aisle?


----------



## Syria Says... AKA Celia Can Read

scarlet said:


> Isle? or Aisle?


Either way: where are we headed to?!


----------



## telracs

Syria Says... said:


> Either way: where are we headed to?!


An Isle?


----------



## Syria Says... AKA Celia Can Read

Will there be tropical drinks?


----------



## telracs

Syria Says... said:


> Will there be tropical drinks?


With little umbrellas?


----------



## Barbiedull

Can I have an umbrella for my Isle seat?


----------



## Syria Says... AKA Celia Can Read

scarlet said:


> With little umbrellas?


Will they be served on the beach?


----------



## Brianna Lee McKenzie

Would someone please pass the suntan lotion?


----------



## Tip10

Which aisle do I go down on the isle to get some ale?


----------



## Susan in VA

Tip10 said:


> Which aisle do I go down on the isle to get some ale?


If isles have aisles, are they round?


----------



## telracs

the aisles or the isles?


----------



## Susan in VA

The aisles, of course.  Aren't isles always sort of roundish?


----------



## Tip10

Another round of ale?


----------



## Susan in VA

Couldya make it tea for me?


----------



## telracs

feeling fuzzy?


----------



## Susan in VA

Don't I have tea most nights?


----------



## Jeff

Is anyone else getting dizzy?


----------



## Syria Says... AKA Celia Can Read

Is it 5 yet?


----------



## loonlover

Why do I wake up early when I don't have to be anywhere?


----------



## telracs

why do my legs hurt?


----------



## geoffthomas

Who hid the cheesecake?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

geoffthomas said:


> Who hid the cheesecake?


Not me...Did you?


----------



## Barbiedull

Jeff said:


> Is anyone else getting dizzy?


 Did someone call me?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

Annie, are you OK? Are you OK, Annie? Annie, are you OK?


----------



## Syria Says... AKA Celia Can Read

Do ya really wanna be startin' somethin'?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

Who's Bad?


----------



## CCrooks

Going where?


----------



## Tip10

If we're going here and there is here where we've been and there where we're going or is here where we're going after we leave here where we are and there where we're going after we leave here where we're going after we leave here where we are?


----------



## John Dax

Janie's got a _what?_


----------



## telracs

JohnDax said:


> Janie's got a _what?_


And where did she get it?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Who's your Daddy??


----------



## caracara

Why should I know?


----------



## Brianna Lee McKenzie

Tip10 said:


> If we're going here and there is here where we've been and there where we're going or is here where we're going after we leave here where we are and there where we're going after we leave here where we're going after we leave here where we are?


Huh?


----------



## Syria Says... AKA Celia Can Read

Brianna Lee McKenzie said:


> Huh?


You didn't get that?


----------



## Brianna Lee McKenzie

Is it neither here nor there?


----------



## Syria Says... AKA Celia Can Read

Maybe it's over here...?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Is this it??


----------



## Susan in VA

No, but maybe _this_ is?


----------



## John Dax

I thought it was that one?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Found it !  Now What?


----------



## Brianna Lee McKenzie

Take a nap?


----------



## Susan in VA

What, _again_?


----------



## caracara

Why not again?


----------



## geoffthomas

What has happened to you?


----------



## John Dax

Did I fall asleep?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

Are we there yet, Papa Smurf?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

That was just the wind, wasn't it ?


----------



## Brenda Carroll

Since when did the wind sound like that?


----------



## geoffthomas

Sound like what?


----------



## John Dax

Does that wind smell funny to you?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

Was that a toot?


----------



## Brianna Lee McKenzie

Did you hear a horn?


----------



## telracs

does anybody read Korean?


----------



## JPStarr

Did someone write on a Korean?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

JPStarr said:


> Did someone write on a Korean?


Tattoo ??


----------



## Brenda Carroll

Permanent marker whilst sleeping?


----------



## Syria Says... AKA Celia Can Read

Did you lose a bet?


----------



## Alle Meine Entchen

why do your kids seem to love you only when there is chocolate to be eaten?


----------



## loonlover

Why am I hungry?


----------



## telracs

Alle Meine Entchen said:


> why do your kids seem to love you only when there is chocolate to be eaten?


or only want to talk to you when you're on the phone?


----------



## John Dax

Did someone say there was chocolate to be eaten?


----------



## telracs

JohnDax said:


> Did someone say there was chocolate to be eaten?


isn't there always?


----------



## Susan in VA

Alle Meine Entchen said:


> why do your kids seem to love you only when there is chocolate to be eaten?


Are you saying you're scarlet's mom?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

Why are people so rude to new members?



Spoiler



Not here of course, I just joined a children's clothing exchange site and older members keep telling me my boxes won't be picked becasue I don't have as many items in the box as they say will fit. And the site FAQs say just stuff the box, because they know you can't set a number.


----------



## Alle Meine Entchen

Susan in VA said:


> Are you saying you're scarlet's mom?


are you saying I'm that old?


----------



## Syria Says... AKA Celia Can Read

Why can't I function before 10 a.m.?


----------



## Susan in VA

Alle Meine Entchen said:


> are you saying I'm that old?


I meant "scarlet's mom in spirit", didn't I?


----------



## caracara

Cobbie said:


> Are we twins?


Triplets perhaps? =)


----------



## John Dax

Seriously, where is the chocolate?


----------



## lonestar

What's going on here?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

GASP !! The chocolate is lost ??


----------



## telracs

NapCat said:


> GASP !! The chocolate is lost ??


Somebody took our chocolate?


Spoiler



checks drawer... okay, my stash is safe.


----------



## Valmore Daniels

Did you eat ALL the chocolate?


----------



## telracs

Valmore Daniels said:


> Did you eat ALL the chocolate?


didn't you see the chocolate still in the drawer?

did *you* eat it all?


----------



## Susan in VA

What's up with this _obsession_ with chocolate?


----------



## telracs

Susan in VA said:


> What's up with this _obsession_ with chocolate?


you got something against chocolate?


----------



## Susan in VA

scarlet said:


> you got something against chocolate?


Aren't there any other topics?


Spoiler



Broccoli? Spinach? Arugula?


----------



## telracs

Susan in VA said:


> Aren't there any other topics?
> 
> 
> Spoiler
> 
> 
> 
> Broccoli? Spinach? Arugula?





Spoiler



Arugula?


 Really?


----------



## Susan in VA

Have you ever tried it as a salad, half


Spoiler



arugula


 and half new potatoes, and a light vinaigrette? Yum.


----------



## Alle Meine Entchen

Susan in VA said:


> Have you ever tried it as a salad, half
> 
> 
> Spoiler
> 
> 
> 
> arugula
> 
> 
> and half new potatoes, and a light vinaigrette? Yum.


are you trying to poison us w/ healthy food?


----------



## Tip10

Scarlet's diet for chocolate_ IS_ pretty healthy -- wouldn't you say?


----------



## telracs

Did I say I had anything against


Spoiler



arugula


?


----------



## Tip10

No but you WOULD rather have


Spoiler



chocolate


 wouldn't you?


----------



## Syria Says... AKA Celia Can Read

What about a


Spoiler



chocolate


 salad?


----------



## caracara

Ice cream topped with


Spoiler



chocolate


 syrup?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Is


Spoiler



Chocolate


 now a dirty word?


----------



## Brianna Lee McKenzie

What did I miss?


----------



## John Dax

Have you tried this


Spoiler



chocolate


 and


Spoiler



arugula


 recipe?

http://www.hersheysweetrecipes.com/recipes/recipe.php?id=179


----------



## Syria Says... AKA Celia Can Read

Who would _actually_ eat


Spoiler



chocolate


 and


Spoiler



arugula


 salad?!


----------



## Susan in VA

Are we going to be banned from KB if we don't spoiler that word now?

Chocolate. CHOCOLATE. * CHOCOLATE! * There, I said it unspoilered, are you happy now?


----------



## crebel

Do we still have to spoiler


Spoiler



arugula


?


----------



## telracs

crebel said:


> Do we still have to spoiler
> 
> 
> Spoiler
> 
> 
> 
> arugula
> 
> 
> ?


Is it spoiled?


----------



## Susan in VA

Do we still have some in the fridge?


----------



## John Dax

Is the fridge running?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Where did the fridge run to ??


----------



## Susan in VA

Mine's on wheels; wouldn't it be rollerskating?


----------



## Tip10

Meals on wheels?


----------



## John Dax

The cake was a lie?


----------



## Brianna Lee McKenzie

Who's John Mayer?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Is it real?


----------



## Syria Says... AKA Celia Can Read

T.L. Haddix said:


> Is it chocolate birthday cake with buttercream frosting?


Is it your birthday?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Have you seen the price of thistle seed, lately ??


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

T.L. Haddix said:


> Is it chocolate birthday cake with buttercream frosting?


Will red velvet cake be an acceptable substitute?


----------



## Syria Says... AKA Celia Can Read

mom133d said:


> Will red velvet cake be an acceptable substitute?


Does it have to be my bday to get some of the red velvet deliciousness too?!


----------



## Brenda Carroll

Does it ever have to be my birthday again?  And if so, why?


----------



## Christopher Bunn

If everything in life is relative, does that mean everything is related?


----------



## telracs

did you feed your washing machine today?


----------



## Syria Says... AKA Celia Can Read

Brendan Carroll said:


> Does it ever have to be my birthday again? And if so, why?


I thought we covered this? Cake and presents, remember?


----------



## telracs

I gotta wait for my birthday for cake?


----------



## John Dax

Instead of birthday cake, can I just have some Anyday cake?


----------



## Brianna Lee McKenzie

Cake? Cake? Cake?  Where's mine?


----------



## Brenda Carroll

What the...?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

Anybody wanna peanut?


----------



## Brianna Lee McKenzie

Are they salted? Dry roasted? or Honey Roasted?


----------



## telracs

Brianna Lee McKenzie said:


> Are they salted? Dry roasted? or Honey Roasted?


Picky, aren't we?


----------



## Brianna Lee McKenzie

scarlet said:


> Picky, aren't we?


Any other nuts? Like Almonds?


----------



## telracs

aren't we all a little nuts?


----------



## Brianna Lee McKenzie

Are there bigger nuts than me?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

T.L. Haddix said:


> I'm making a late tuna run. Anyone else want in?


Spawning? Are We?


----------



## AnneKAlbert

Spawning? Us or aliens?


----------



## crebel

Why are men's dress shirts packaged with so many da*n steps to open?


----------



## telracs

anybody wanna chat?


----------



## Brianna Lee McKenzie

did I miss the chat session?


----------



## John Dax

There's a chat session?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Why is Scarlet alone in the Chat room


----------



## Alle Meine Entchen

where did my thin mints go?


Spoiler



I ate the entire box by myself in 24 hrs


----------



## crebel

NapCat said:


> Why is Scarlet alone in the Chat room


Why did you leave her there alone?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

crebel said:


> Why did you leave her there alone?



I was the last to leave, chivalrous, don't you think??


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

Why does she have to make everytihg so difficult?


----------



## J Dean

Who is John Galt?


----------



## tsilver

Aren't the Galts notorious in New Orleans?


----------



## geoffthomas

Don't we know that John Galt grew up in Ohio?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Why even bother to wash the car??


----------



## Brianna Lee McKenzie

Isn't that the secret to getting it to rain?


----------



## tsilver

Is a bell sound really "ding dong?"


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Have you seen what these kids are doing on snowboards ??


----------



## Valmore Daniels

When is there NOT snow?  (it seems)


----------



## John Dax

I wonder if I could sell "Unassembled Snowmen" from the front yard?


----------



## telracs

JohnDax said:


> I wonder if I could sell "Unassembled Snowmen" from the front yard?


How about "build your own snowmen"?


----------



## tsilver

Can you eat snow?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

Is it yellow?


----------



## Brianna Lee McKenzie

Has anyone seen my dog?


----------



## tsilver

I ate a hot dog


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Why is that dog looking at my cats ??


----------



## John Dax

Why am I not eating chocolate?


----------



## gina1230

Why is it raining when it's supposed to be snowing?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Why am I hear, when I should be outside??


----------



## telracs

did i hear my name?


----------



## tsilver

Why does junk food have a bad reputation?


----------



## Susan in VA

If Nature made our bodies so they'd need things like broccoli, why couldn't it make broccoli taste like chocolate?


----------



## tsilver

Is that why I like being bad?


----------



## John Dax

If information wants to be free, can chocolate be free too?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Is it naptime yet?


----------



## tsilver

Haven't you had enough sleep?


----------



## Barbiedull

Why are cookies so yummy?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Yummy cookies? Where?


----------



## Maud Muller

Is that chocolate all over my Kindle?


----------



## Syria Says... AKA Celia Can Read

Eileen Muller said:


> Is that chocolate all over my Kindle?


Can I take a closer lick look at your Kindle?


----------



## telracs

Eileen Muller said:


> Is that chocolate all over my Kindle?


how did you get chocolate on your kindle?



Spoiler



(even I'm more careful than that)...


----------



## Valmore Daniels

Why must you mention chocolate?


----------



## telracs

Valmore Daniels said:


> Why must you mention chocolate?


Because chocolate is the staff of life?


----------



## Syria Says... AKA Celia Can Read

But, what about cookies?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

What about them?


----------



## crebel

Are they chocolate cookies?


----------



## Brianna Lee McKenzie

As long as they are cookies, what does it matter?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

All these cookies....Got Milk??


----------



## John Dax

Is it only a matter of time before someone brings up arugula?


----------



## telracs

JohnDax said:


> Is it only a matter of time before someone brings up arugula?


Is it arugula season ALREADY?


----------



## Brianna Lee McKenzie

Where's the arugula?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

Brianna Lee McKenzie said:


> Where's the arugula?


Where's the eruca sativa ?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

What, the devil is eruca sativa ?


----------



## loonlover

You didn't Google it to find out?


----------



## John Dax

Doesn't googling it make you go blind?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

Are you still mad I gave a mohawk to your cat?


----------



## Maud Muller

Does anyone have a recipe for a chocolate salad?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

mom133d said:


> Are you still mad I gave a mohawk to your cat?


Need you ask?


----------



## Brianna Lee McKenzie

Have you ever goggled yourself?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Have you ever ogled yourself ?


----------



## Syria Says... AKA Celia Can Read

If at first you succeed, then what?


----------



## telracs

why can't people clean up their own messes before condemning me?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Why would we condemn you??


----------



## tsilver

Why do people have middle names?


----------



## Cindy416

tsilver said:


> Why do people have middle names?


So their moms can yell at them when they're kids and are in trouble.


----------



## John Dax

What were those kids meddling in?


----------



## Susan in VA

tsilver said:


> Why do people have middle names?


I don't have one; does that make me a non-person?


----------



## telracs

Susan in VA said:


> I don't have one; does that make me a non-person?


Am I a non-person too?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

Why am I standing here beside myself?


----------



## geoffthomas

Will you join the Saturday night chat tomorrow?


----------



## telracs

Cobbie said:


> Isn't a non-person someone who doesn't own a cell phone?


Are you picking on me again? Should I start mentioning people who use their PHONES as cameras?


----------



## Brianna Lee McKenzie

scarlet said:


> Are you picking on me again? Should I start mentioning people who use their PHONES as cameras?


When did you get the awesome avatar Scarlet?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Why do we bother with Daylight Savings Time??


----------



## Susan in VA

Scarlet, is it Halloween where you are?


----------



## telracs

Susan in VA said:


> Scarlet, is it Halloween where you are?


Isn't it always?


----------



## caracara

Does that mean I should except candy from strangers?


----------



## Susan in VA

scarlet said:


> Isn't it always?


Hmmm.... does that idea trouble anyone else?


----------



## telracs

caracara said:


> Does that mean I should except candy from strangers?


You calling me a stranger?


----------



## Jeff

scarlet said:


> You calling me a stranger?


Don't you pride yourself in being strange?


----------



## caracara

scarlet said:


> You calling me a stranger?


Not if your handing out chocolate!

Are you?


----------



## tsilver

Why is Georgia on your mind?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Have you seen Georgia ??


----------



## Susan in VA

_Which_ Georgia? U.S. or Eurasia?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Georgia LaFayette

Ain't she hot??


----------



## Susan in VA

Could I wear that dress to lunch?


----------



## Susan in VA

Would you like the gloves to go with the hat?


----------



## spotsmom

Well, fiddle dee dee.  War, war, war.  It's spoiled all the best parties this summer at Tara.


----------



## telracs

spotsmom said:


> Well, fiddle dee dee. War, war, war. It's spoiled all the best parties this summer at Tara.


spotsmom, did you know that this is the "Random question" thread?

would you mind posting here only in the form of a question?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Oh My !
Its Gone !
Its Lost !
Forever !

Where is the hour I had when I went to bed ??


----------



## Valmore Daniels

Why is life like a box of chocolates?


----------



## telracs

Valmore Daniels said:


> Why is life like a box of chocolates?


Because I'm gonna get as much out of it as I can?


----------



## Keith Blenman

Why was there a butterfly knife on the bathroom counter?


----------



## telracs

Valmore Daniels said:


> Why is life like a box of chocolates?


Because it's best if you share it with friends?


----------



## Alle Meine Entchen

why has DD suddenly decided that Gizmo (the wonder pug) must be dragged thru the house by her hindlegs (or worse, tail)?


----------



## tsilver

Why is it dangerous to jaywalk?


----------



## telracs

Valmore Daniels said:


> Why is life like a box of chocolates?


Because we all need a little variety in our lives?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

tsilver said:


> Why is it dangerous to jaywalk?


Have you seen the way Jays walk?


----------



## telracs

Valmore Daniels said:


> Why is life like a box of chocolates?


Because we're all a little nuts?


----------



## kaotickitten

What time is it on Mars?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Do Martians switch to Daylight Savings Time??


----------



## kaotickitten

If Martians hd Kindles, do they call them Kindles?


----------



## Tip10

Why am I here?


----------



## geoffthomas

Why ARE you here?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

What are you having for Pi Day dinner?


----------



## tsilver

Are you for real?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Why won't "they" call ??


----------



## kaotickitten

Who is "they" and why  do I want them to call?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

Why can't you push the toothpaste back in the tube?


----------



## crebel

How cute is my grandson?!


----------



## tsilver

Why did I flunk Kindergarten?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

When is enough "enough"?


----------



## Maud Muller

How can enough be not enough?


----------



## geoffthomas

How can it be 50 years since I graduated from High School?


----------



## Maud Muller

Did they have high schools fifty years ago?


----------



## Susan in VA

geoffthomas said:


> How can it be 50 years since I graduated from High School?


Maybe you just made a math error?


----------



## cinder

Why do I always fall for the wrong person?


----------



## telracs

geoffthomas said:


> How can it be 50 years since I graduated from High School?


Time flies


Spoiler



when you don't know what's going on


?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

What is going on??


----------



## geoffthomas

Who are all these people?


----------



## Tip10

If ignorance is bliss then why aren't all the people here happy?



Spoiler



Umm, here is NOT Kindleboards...


----------



## tsilver

Do perky people perk like coffee?


----------



## Annalog

crebel said:


> How cute is my grandson?!


Is he SuperCute?


----------



## *DrDLN* (dr.s.dhillon)

scarlet said:


> Doc, can you please post your responses in the form of a question?


Sorry, When do we start aging?


----------



## Brianna Lee McKenzie

Can you guess how old I am?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

26?


----------



## Maud Muller

Can anybody guess what year I graduated from high school?


----------



## Brianna Lee McKenzie

NapCat said:


> 26?


Thank You. Any more guesses?


----------



## telracs

Brianna Lee McKenzie said:


> Thank You. Any more guesses?


18?


----------



## Keith Blenman

Regardless of your age, why wouldn't you just take the 26?!


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

Red Lobster tonight?


----------



## telracs

chat tonight?


----------



## lonestar

Did you look at the moon tonight?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Did you see all those clouds??


----------



## telracs

NapCat said:


> Did you see all those clouds??


what clouds?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

What do clouds have to do with it?


----------



## tsilver

Was that you who belched?


----------



## kaotickitten

Why do dogs bark at noyhing?


----------



## John Dax

Have you seen the resolution outside? (It's amazing!)


----------



## kaotickitten

How did the celbs in the 40's and 50's have such clean shaven faces?


----------



## Keith Blenman

Why is Randy Woodfield's handwriting so crazy?


----------



## Susan in VA

Where did the weekend go??


----------



## Alle Meine Entchen

how do you make sure termites don't eat your house?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Brrrr !  This is Spring??


----------



## telracs

who broke the software?


----------



## loonlover

Where did all the leaves come from?  Surely not just from the trees in our yard?


----------



## *DrDLN* (dr.s.dhillon)

lonestar said:


> Did you look at the moon tonight?


Can you see moon through thick clouds?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Got your taxes finished


----------



## geoffthomas

Did you remember to mail the completed tax forms?


----------



## telracs

geoffthomas said:


> Did you remember to mail the completed tax forms?


you didn't e-file?


----------



## Syria Says... AKA Celia Can Read

Is it true?


----------



## Susan in VA

But what is truth?


Spoiler



(Cue for scarlet... )


----------



## telracs

Isn't truth in the eye of the beholder?


----------



## telracs

are they made from real girl scouts?


----------



## Syria Says... AKA Celia Can Read

He coughs up blood?

(Not like he used to...)


----------



## JimC1946

Why is the sky blue?


----------



## Syria Says... AKA Celia Can Read

Is that the white or the red?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

May I have a glass of red?


----------



## telracs

Syria Says... said:


> He coughs up blood?
> 
> (Not like he used to...)


So, is Fester really Fester?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

What's in a name?


----------



## geoffthomas

Are pixies related to pixels?


----------



## kaotickitten

Why is it that the muppets aren't like by kids as much anymore?


----------



## Brianna Lee McKenzie

Doesn't Elmo giggle like a kid?


----------



## Susan in VA

geoffthomas said:


> Are pixies related to pixels?


Are you comparing real cats and literary cats?


----------



## Alle Meine Entchen

why am I not sleepy?


Spoiler



It's almost 11pm here and I have to get up early to see DH off


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Why lie?


----------



## geoffthomas

Why lay?


----------



## Syria Says... AKA Celia Can Read

What's for lunch?


----------



## telracs

Syria Says... said:


> What's for lunch?


who's buying?


----------



## geoffthomas

Do you mean that you are NOT cooking?


----------



## crebel

Does Scarlet EVER cook?


----------



## telracs

is it soup yet?


----------



## Brianna Lee McKenzie

Homemade Chicken soup?


----------



## telracs

what is this homemade you speak of?


----------



## crebel

The chocolate brownies are ready, is anyone coming over to eat them?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Iowa brownies ??


----------



## telracs

would you really eat something I cooked?


----------



## Barbiedull

scarlet said:


> would you really eat something I cooked?


 Could I have my dog taste it first?


Spoiler



I have a Rottweiler that has refused to eat my cooking. He begs for sugar cookies when I make them though....


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Who's on first ?


----------



## kaotickitten

What is second?


----------



## *DrDLN* (dr.s.dhillon)

Isn't truthful living higher, even if truth is high?


----------



## Susan in VA

What's this about scarlet cooking dinner for us??


----------



## telracs

Cobbie said:


> Do we really want Scarlet to cook dinner for us?


not tonight, do you?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

Did anyone turn on the coffee yet?


----------



## *DrDLN* (dr.s.dhillon)

Does wealth bring you happiness?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

What am I forgetting ??


----------



## telracs

have i told you folks lately how wonderful you all are?


----------



## Jeff

scarlet said:


> have i told you folks lately how wonderful you all are?


Wouldn't that be entirely out of character?


----------



## telracs

Jeff said:


> Wouldn't that be entirely out of character?


darn, can't i put aside the queen of mean title for a couple of days?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

ewww, What's that smell?


----------



## kaotickitten

Why does it take so long for quiting time Friday to come, but so quick for monday morning to show up?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Where ??


----------



## Susan in VA

Jeff said:


> Wouldn't that be entirely out of character?


 

Didn't you know she really has a heart of milk chocolate?


----------



## Jeff

Green chocolate?


----------



## Barbiedull

Why does my browser keep crashing on Kindleboards?


----------



## Jeff

Barbiedull said:


> Why does my browser keep crashing on Kindleboards?


Is it "Cannot connect to SMF database", or similar words?


Spoiler



Not your browser.


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Why can't the weather stay just like this ??


----------



## Syria Says... AKA Celia Can Read

Do you like my pretty purple shirt?


----------



## Barbiedull

Jeff said:


> Is it "Cannot connect to SMF database", or similar words?
> 
> 
> Spoiler
> 
> 
> 
> Not your browser.





Spoiler



No, it's my browser... (IE) It actually crashes, and all of my history links from Kindleboards for the day will disappear. I also have to login again after that.



Maybe I need the newer version of IE that was recently released?


----------



## Syria Says... AKA Celia Can Read

Is the evil sock money bothering anyone else too?!


----------



## telracs

wouldn't it be helpful if the IT guy spoke English?


----------



## Jeff

Barbiedull said:


> Spoiler
> 
> 
> 
> No, it's my browser... (IE) It actually crashes, and all of my history links from Kindleboards for the day will disappear. I also have to login again after that.
> 
> 
> 
> Maybe I need the newer version of IE that was recently released?


Have you tried Google's Chrome browser?


----------



## Grace Elliot

Does anyone have a full proof way of getting the smell of stale cat pee out of carpet? 

(And yes, I have tryed biological powder and bicarbonate of soda.)


----------



## geoffthomas

Have you tried burning the carpet?


----------



## Barbiedull

Jeff said:


> Have you tried Google's Chrome browser?
> 
> 
> 
> Spoiler
> 
> 
> 
> I use Google Chrome too, but I like IE better for the history and favorites.


----------



## Alle Meine Entchen

Grace Elliot said:


> Does anyone have a full proof way of getting the smell of stale cat pee out of carpet?
> 
> (And yes, I have tryed biological powder and bicarbonate of soda.)





Spoiler



there is a product called "Odobanhttp://www.amazon.com/OdoBan-Odor-Eliminator-Gallon-Concentrate/dp/B000ZOQ9HY" that we used to get the smell of cat urine out of our hardwood floors (it only took about 3 days of nonstop scrubing)



Why do doctors assume you're stupid?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

When does the song end?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Is that a spider on my wall


----------



## *DrDLN* (dr.s.dhillon)

what's supporting the earth?


----------



## telracs

have you ever considered becoming a duck?


----------



## Syria Says... AKA Celia Can Read

Did you know that the quack of a duck is the only sound that does not have an echo?


----------



## Tip10

What about the Sound of Silence?


----------



## telracs

Syria Says... said:


> Did you know that the quack of a duck is the only sound that does not have an echo?


didn't mythbusters bust that?


----------



## Syria Says... AKA Celia Can Read

Did you hear that Myth Busters crushed my non-echo quacking dreams?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

So ? Why are the birds angry ??


----------



## tsilver

Why is my reading device called a Kindle?


----------



## Syria Says... AKA Celia Can Read

Where's all the rain?


----------



## *DrDLN* (dr.s.dhillon)

Is the rainy season gone in northern CA?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Are there enough lifeboats ??


----------



## *DrDLN* (dr.s.dhillon)

What makes you relax the most?


----------



## John Dax

Has anyone started a fire with their Kindle?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

Is it too loud?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Where is the Sunday paper ?


----------



## Ann in Arlington

NapCat said:


> Where is the Sunday paper ?


Mine's on my Kindle. Isn't yours?


----------



## Tip10

NapCat said:


> Where is the Sunday paper ?





Ann in Arlington said:


> Mine's on my Kindle. Isn't yours?


Is it still a paper if it isn't paper?


----------



## Alle Meine Entchen

why am I so nauseaus?


Spoiler



(stupid morning sickness)


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Is it soup yet ??


----------



## *DrDLN* (dr.s.dhillon)

What is true love?


----------



## Susan in VA

Alle Meine Entchen said:


> why am I so nauseaus?
> 
> 
> Spoiler
> 
> 
> 
> (stupid morning sickness)


Did I miss an announcement? When's the big event?


----------



## telracs

did i mention that my new kindle is here?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Do you know how happy we all are for you ??


----------



## Vegas_Asian

Are we all joyous enough for a happy dance?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

Pardon me; do you have any Grey Poupon?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Got Milk?


----------



## D/W

Where's the beef?


----------



## Alle Meine Entchen

Susan in VA said:


> Did I miss an announcement? When's the big event?


Did I not say?


Spoiler



According to the dr (went today) Dec 9th


----------



## *DrDLN* (dr.s.dhillon)

Is anyone in love?


----------



## Susan in VA

Alle Meine Entchen said:


> Did I not say?
> 
> 
> Spoiler
> 
> 
> 
> According to the dr (went today) Dec 9th


A belated _Nikolausgeschenk_ for the family? 

Does the Boss know yet?


----------



## John Dax

Why are all the colors messed up in my Chrome browser?


----------



## Alle Meine Entchen

Susan in VA said:


> A belated _Nikolausgeschenk_ for the family?
> 
> Does the Boss know yet?


Why did I give into my inner child and eat 2 cadbury creme eggs in a row?



Spoiler



Thanks for the congrats, and we haven't told her yet b/c it's too new. I don't want to jinx myself


----------



## geoffthomas

Will Spring Showers bring flowers?


----------



## telracs

Alle Meine Entchen said:


> Why did I give into my inner child and eat 2 cadbury creme eggs in a row?


1) Because cadbury creme eggs are incredibly delicious?
or
2) Because they are smaller this year then last year and it takes to satisfy the craving?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

Will I be reporting to work on Monday?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

scarlet said:


> 1) Because cadbury creme eggs are incredibly delicious?
> or
> 2) Because they are smaller this year then last year and it takes to satisfy the craving?


Have they returned to the original, more liquidy, center filling?


----------



## geoffthomas

Do you really want to know?


----------



## D/W

Who are you?


----------



## telracs

DreamWeaver said:


> Who are you?


What are you, a Vorlon?


----------



## D/W

scarlet said:


> What are you, a Vorlon?


Why do you ask? Are you?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

No!? Not you ??


----------



## telracs

Don't you know that "who are you" is the Vorlon question?


Spoiler



what do you want? is the Shadow question


----------



## D/W

What do you want?


----------



## Tip10

Who do you want?


----------



## Alle Meine Entchen

why am I always soo close to crying?


----------



## *DrDLN* (dr.s.dhillon)

Who am I?


----------



## Tip10

A thought?


----------



## crebel

Do you have one?


----------



## intinst

How would I know?


----------



## Tip10

Ummm, because you are


----------



## Alle Meine Entchen

I know you are, but what am I?


----------



## Tip10

Alle Meine Entchen said:


> I know you are, but what am I?


Emotional?               
 



Alle Meine Entchen said:


> why am I always soo close to crying?





Spoiler



SORRY! Couldn't resist!!


----------



## geoffthomas

What is the temperature of the sun?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

What's the holdup?


----------



## telracs

Is EVERYBODY stupid?


----------



## crebel

Are you calling me stupid?


----------



## telracs

scarlet said:


> Is EVERYBODY stupid?





crebel said:


> Are you calling me stupid?


So I guess the answer to my question is no?


----------



## crebel

Cobbie said:


> Whew! Right, Chris?


Aren't you glad I put myself and not you in the line of fire?


----------



## Brianna Lee McKenzie

Should I stay out of this one?


----------



## telracs

Why did I listen to that man?


----------



## Syria Says... AKA Celia Can Read

With a quadrillion billion channels, why is there nothing on TV?!


----------



## NapCat (retired)

How can I possible NEED (?) an additional terabyte of memory ??


----------



## John Dax

NapCat said:


> How can I possible NEED (?) an additional terabyte of memory ??


How could you possibly _not_ need it?


----------



## loonlover

Syria Says... said:


> With a quadrillion billion channels, why is there nothing on TV?!


Why did we find more to watch when there were only 3 channels?


----------



## Alle Meine Entchen

loonlover said:


> Why did we find more to watch when there were only 3 channels?


What about netflix?


----------



## *DrDLN* (dr.s.dhillon)

What am I doing here?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

They did what ??


----------



## telracs

why is it always my fault?


----------



## crebel

If it is always your fault, why did you tell everyone it was my fault?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

A geologic fault ??


----------



## Susan in VA

Maybe just a _logic_ fault?


----------



## John Dax

Have you seen Fawlty Towers?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

Who called the English teacher "Daddy-O"?


----------



## Beatriz

sjc said:


> Why do birds fly?


could it be because they have wings?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Why are the dolphins smiling ?


----------



## D/W

Valmore Daniels said:


> Who called the English teacher "Daddy-O"?


Charlie Brown?


----------



## John Dax

Is it still Monday?


----------



## Syria Says... AKA Celia Can Read

Can I have a cookie?


----------



## geoffthomas

Where is the door into Summer?


----------



## John Dax

Where do they keep their phones?


----------



## Syria Says... AKA Celia Can Read

Why doesn't HOUSTON get the Space Shuttle?!


----------



## *DrDLN* (dr.s.dhillon)

How to keep your feet on the ground!


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

*DrDln* (dr.s.dhillon) said:


> How to keep your feet on the ground!


Keep your feet on the ground?


----------



## gina1230

Why is it going to be windy tomorrow?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

gina1230 said:


> Why is it going to be windy tomorrow?


Because it forgot that yesterday was Windsday?


----------



## Susan in VA

mom133d said:


> Because it forgot that yesterday was Windsday?


Has anyone heard a worse pun this year?


----------



## Syria Says... AKA Celia Can Read

Who's buyin' me lunch today?


----------



## telracs

when the


Spoiler



HECK


 are they going to record those cast recordings I want?


----------



## *DrDLN* (dr.s.dhillon)

What's going on?


----------



## Susan in VA

Did everyone get their taxes done?


----------



## SimonWood

If there is such a thing as political science, why are there no equations?


----------



## Susan in VA

SimonWood said:


> If there is such a thing as political science, why are there no equations?


Because if they called it art, they'd have to find more aesthetically appealing politicians?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

How far now, Papa Smurf?


----------



## John Dax

Has anyone ever actually died from eating Death By Chocolate?


----------



## Syria Says... AKA Celia Can Read

Did someone say "chocolate"?!


----------



## John Dax

Syria Says... said:


> Did someone say "chocolate"?!


Was it me?


----------



## Susan in VA

Are we back to chocolate _again_?


----------



## telracs

Susan in VA said:


> Are we back to chocolate _again_?


When did we leave it?


----------



## Susan in VA

Did you know there are people who don't like chocolate?  


Spoiler



Not me, of course.


----------



## Syria Says... AKA Celia Can Read

Susan in VA said:


> Did you know there are people who don't like chocolate?
> 
> 
> Spoiler
> 
> 
> 
> Not me, of course.


Did you know that those same people have no souls?!


----------



## geoffthomas

Why are fools running things?


----------



## telracs

geoffthomas said:


> Why are fools running things?


Because smart people are too smart to want to?


----------



## NogDog

If a tree falls in a forest and nobody is there to hear it, does the tree feel as if it wasted its time?


----------



## Susan in VA

NogDog said:


> If a tree falls in a forest and nobody is there to hear it, does the tree feel as if it wasted its time?


But maybe it's more comfortable lying down?


----------



## telracs

did you finish your term paper?


----------



## Susan in VA

Can't I take a break??



Spoiler



Actually I can't easily work on it during the day because it's spring break and DD is home, so concentrating on a paper is best left until after her bedtime.


----------



## SimonWood

Are you a Twit if you use Twitter?


----------



## John Dax

Syria Says... said:


> Did you know that those same people have no souls?!


Do they also have ginger hair?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Is it true cannibals don't eat clowns because they taste funny?


----------



## telracs

Cobbie said:


> Have you been listening in on my husband's comments?


great minds think alike?


----------



## Susan in VA

Why didn't I remember to make ice cubes?


----------



## telracs

Susan in VA said:


> Why didn't I remember to make ice cubes?


why don't you like warm drinks?


----------



## Susan in VA

I like _water_ at room temperature, but how am I supposed to have more iced tea without ice?



Spoiler



If I just put it in the fridge it will take too long to get really cold.


----------



## MaryKingsley

How do you solve a problem like Maria? No, seriously. How _do_ you solve a problem like Maria?


----------



## telracs

Susan in VA said:


> I like _water_ at room temperature, but how am I supposed to have more iced tea without ice?
> 
> 
> 
> Spoiler
> 
> 
> 
> If I just put it in the fridge it will take too long to get really cold.


Make it with COLD water?


----------



## Susan in VA

scarlet said:


> Make it with COLD water?


I know you don't cook, but haven't you ever brewed_ tea_??


----------



## Tip10

Susan in VA said:


> I know you don't cook, but haven't you ever brewed_ tea_??


You've never cold brewed tea? 



Spoiler



Of course, some teas should not be cold brewed. For those that can be, cold brewing is better.


----------



## Susan in VA

Do I really want to wait four hours for a cup of tea?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

How about putting the glass of tea in the freezer for a little while?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

Are we all just dust in the wind?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Is Kansas the only place there is dusty wind?


----------



## Tip10

Have you never been to California during Santa Ana's?


----------



## geoffthomas

But have you ever been there during Santa Claus' visit?


----------



## crebel

What is this bright light shining thru my windows?


----------



## SimonWood

Why is it people who desire a small government then ask for your vote?


----------



## Syria Says... AKA Celia Can Read

Why do I still feel like I need a nap after the nap I already had?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Why do hummingbirds, hum ??


----------



## Mark Adair

And mockingbirds don't mock?


----------



## telracs

how exactly did i get this sunburn?


----------



## Mark Adair

scarlet said:


> how exactly did i get this sunburn?


 ?


----------



## Alle Meine Entchen

why does the thought of eating BW3's make me hungry?


----------



## john_a_karr

Do zombies prefer blondes, brunettes or redheads?


----------



## *DrDLN* (dr.s.dhillon)

What are Zombies?


----------



## SimonWood

why do i keep dropping things today?


----------



## John Dax

Whose line _is_ it, anyways?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

What's my line ??


----------



## SimonWood

Why is it on every Earth Day, they make lots of products to celebrate? I thought the point was we were supposed to conserve.


----------



## rayhensley

"What the hell is a gander anyway?" 
- George Costanza, _Seinfeld_


----------



## Brianna Lee McKenzie

Just what is good for the goose?


----------



## telracs

Alle Meine Entchen said:


> why does the thought of eating BW3's make me hungry?


what's a BW3?


----------



## rayhensley

Where is this "other side" that the grass is so much greener?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

At what temperature do you know your goose is cooked?


----------



## rayhensley

Did you know that the original title for War and Peace was War, What Is It Good For?​


----------



## Alle Meine Entchen

scarlet said:


> what's a BW3?


Have you never heard of Buffalo Wild Wings?


----------



## Brianna Lee McKenzie

Can buffaloes really fly?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

scarlet said:


> what's a BW3?


Buffalo Wild Wings and Weck - but what the heck is a "weck"?


----------



## telracs

How did Mr. Phelps know where to find the tapes that told him what the Impossible Mission was?

And why weren't they just delivered to him?


----------



## Syria Says... AKA Celia Can Read

Who put that hair in my toothbrush?  

(I was Googling something earlier that started with "who" and this is one of the auto-suggestions... Wait...whaaaaat?)


----------



## rayhensley

Shouldn't it be Teethbrush?


----------



## Syria Says... AKA Celia Can Read

Who are Charlie Sheen's goddesses?

(Another question suggested by The Google.)


----------



## Susan in VA

Does anyone remember how to look things up in a_ library_?


----------



## telracs

where you been?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Is that piranha wearing lipstick ??


----------



## Tip10

Why is it called looking things up when invariably you are actually looking down?


----------



## telracs

NapCat said:


> Is that piranha wearing lipstick ??


You got a problem with that?


----------



## Susan in VA

Would it be polite to tell a piranha that it has lipstick on its teeth?


----------



## *DrDLN* (dr.s.dhillon)

Are romance and love the same?


----------



## kaotickitten

Whom shall I fear?


----------



## Courtney Cantrell

So, why the heck _is_ a raven like a writing desk?


----------



## telracs

do i have a glowing sign above my head saying "ask me for directions"?


----------



## crebel

scarlet said:


> do i have a glowing sign above my head saying "ask me for directions"?


I don't see one, but couldn't Glendon add one?


----------



## telracs

Courtney Cantrell said:


> So, why the heck _is_ a raven like a writing desk?


Because Lewis Carroll said so?


----------



## Courtney Cantrell

scarlet said:


> Because Lewis Carroll said so?


Because he was on many drugs?


----------



## telracs

Why do I always think I'm going to get out on time on Saturday?


----------



## Susan in VA

crebel said:


> I don't see one, but couldn't Glendon add one?


Wouldn't it get soggy underwater?


----------



## rayhensley

What's the meaning of Life?


----------



## Courtney Cantrell

Is there always life in meaning?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

Don't you just love bright sunny Sundays?


----------



## *DrDLN* (dr.s.dhillon)

Why are people crazy about royal wedding?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Quoth the raven, `Nevermore.'??


----------



## Susan in VA

So why don't the birds in my back yard talk?


----------



## Jeff

Susan in VA said:


> So why don't the birds in my back yard talk?


Maybe they do, but you don't understand their language.


----------



## Susan in VA

So you think they might be poetically inclined just like that raven?


----------



## Jeff

This it is, and nothing more.


----------



## Susan in VA

Are you all out of question marks?


----------



## Jeff

Susan in VA said:


> Are you all out of question marks?


No. I'm rebelling against questions in favor of specific answers.


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

Did someone get up on the wrong side of the bed?


----------



## telracs

I thought I was the anarchistic in the family¿


----------



## Jeff

?







?


----------



## telracs

bad day, dear?


----------



## Jeff

Have you never just felt ornery?


----------



## Alle Meine Entchen

Was there a time when this:







was attractive?


----------



## Susan in VA

Jeff said:


> Have you never just felt ornery?


Are you over it yet?


----------



## telracs

Jeff said:


> Have you never just felt ornery?


When haven't I?


----------



## Jeff

Susan in VA said:


> Are you over it yet?


Isn't it Scarlet's turn now?


----------



## Susan in VA

Isn't it an ongoing condition with scarlet?


----------



## telracs

Is ornery really the word for me?


----------



## Jeff

What would you prefer?


----------



## telracs

did you know we have an improntu chat going on?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

Is the coffee ready yet?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Would you like cream and sugar ??


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

Am I late?


----------



## rayhensley

Why is the grass greener on the other side?


----------



## Syria Says... AKA Celia Can Read

rayhensley said:


> Why is the grass greener on the other side?


Because I burned your side of the hill...?


----------



## Susan in VA

<snort> 
Are you always that evil?


----------



## rayhensley

Why are they called _apartments _when they're so close together?


----------



## *DrDLN* (dr.s.dhillon)

What happened to AssoMamma's wounded wife?


----------



## Val2

Is the Pope a Catholic?


----------



## intinst

Is a pig's


Spoiler



butt


 pork?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Bacon??


----------



## geoffthomas

Is there anything that Bacon doesn't make better?


----------



## Susan in VA

Maybe chocolate cream pie?  Vanilla ice cream?  Fresh strawberries?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

geoffthomas said:


> Is there anything that Bacon doesn't make better?


Toothpaste?


----------



## rayhensley

Who is Keyser Soze?


----------



## Alle Meine Entchen

Why am I so tired?



Spoiler



DH left his black berry in the bedroom last night and got 115 emails from work between 3 am and 6am. Around 3:30am I took the phone, put it in the bathroom (down the hall) and put a pillow over my head so I couldn't hear the stupid email dings. DH slept thru the whole thing.


----------



## *DrDLN* (dr.s.dhillon)

Do you judge book by the cover?


----------



## NogDog

How do vampires always look good with perfect hair when they can't see themselves in mirrors?


----------



## kaotickitten

Do dolphins cry?


----------



## rayhensley

Why did I dream of zombies last night?


----------



## jherrick

Say what?


----------



## Susan in VA

NogDog said:


> How do vampires always look good with perfect hair when they can't see themselves in mirrors?


Hmm. And in all these years of vampire books and movies, why has nobody ever pointed this out before?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

"...Are you lonesome, tonight ?..."


----------



## gina1230

Why did my friend lock her keys in her car today?


----------



## John Dax

*DrDln* (dr.s.dhillon) said:


> Do you judge book by the cover?


Doesn't everyone, at least a little?


----------



## lonestar

Got chocolate?


----------



## Susan in VA

No, will you share yours?


----------



## rayhensley

I'd like some please?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

"...Please sir, can I have more porridge?..."


----------



## Syria Says... AKA Celia Can Read

Can I add an extra day to this weekend?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

Did you think this would be the day?


----------



## rayhensley

No?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

NogDog said:


> How do vampires always look good with perfect hair when they can't see themselves in mirrors?


Could it be because vampire hair doesn't grow, so the mortician had the hair perfect in their coffin?


----------



## JFHilborne

Where's the coffee?


----------



## telracs

anyone want to hear the book of mormon broadway cast recording?

http://www.npr.org/2011/05/09/136054170/first-listen-cast-recording-the-book-of-mormon

NOTE: this is NOT suitable for listening at work.


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Hello ??


----------



## Susan in VA

Who's there?


----------



## telracs

Beuller?  Beuller?


----------



## Courtney Cantrell

Would anyone really want to be a fry cook on Venus?


----------



## rayhensley

Is there a pot of gold under a rainbow?


----------



## JFHilborne

Where are all the ladybirds coming from? (in-house joke).


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Who's sorry now ?


----------



## *DrDLN* (dr.s.dhillon)

Why is the world getting sillier and sillier?


----------



## telracs

have people really had enough of silly love songs?


----------



## Syria Says... AKA Celia Can Read

scarlet said:


> have people really had enough of silly love songs?


I don't know...do any of these silly love songs feature chocolate?


----------



## StephenLivingston

Would you like to read my collection of short stories?


----------



## Susan in VA

What kind of cake am I going to bake for DD's dad's birthday?


----------



## John Dax

Why doesn't anyone expect the Spanish Inquisition?


----------



## Courtney Cantrell

Why do birds suddenly appear?


----------



## Syria Says... AKA Celia Can Read

Is the bird really the word?


----------



## *DrDLN* (dr.s.dhillon)

Are you concerned about health in old age?


----------



## Tip10

Susan in VA said:


> What kind of cake am I going to bake for DD's dad's birthday?


DW got sent a recipe for a tomato cake yesterday -- think your DD would go for it??


----------



## Valmore Daniels

Who can it be now?


----------



## rayhensley

Is the mailman watching me?


----------



## Susan in VA

Tip10 said:


> DW got sent a recipe for a tomato cake yesterday -- think your DD would go for it??


I've heard of zucchini cake and carrot cake, but tomato


----------



## JFHilborne

Have you called Jenny yet?


----------



## Susan in VA

Should all of us call Jenny?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

NO ! No ! Not Jenny


----------



## Susan in VA

But maybe Jenny has chocolate to share?


----------



## Keith Blenman

Why did I have to have dreams about failing to solve math problems?


----------



## Alle Meine Entchen

Susan in VA said:


> But maybe Jenny has chocolate to share?


what woman in her right mind would share chocolate?


Spoiler



I know I haven't. I'm almost thru an entire pan of brownies and I've yet to share a single bite


----------



## telracs

Alle Meine Entchen said:


> what woman in her right mind would share chocolate?
> 
> 
> Spoiler
> 
> 
> 
> I know I haven't. I'm almost thru an entire pan of brownies and I've yet to share a single bite


a nice one?


Spoiler



but all bets are off when you're preggers, no sharing then.


----------



## Syria Says... AKA Celia Can Read

Is that a banana in your pocket...?

If so, aren't you concerned about bruising?


----------



## Tip10

Alle Meine Entchen said:


> what woman in her right mind would share chocolate?
> 
> 
> Spoiler
> 
> 
> 
> I know I haven't. I'm almost thru an entire pan of brownies and I've yet to share a single bite





scarlet said:


> a nice one?
> 
> 
> Spoiler
> 
> 
> 
> but all bets are off when you're preggers, no sharing then.


She must be nice then since isn't she sharing all of it?


Spoiler



Don't you share everything you eat when you are preggers?


----------



## Syria Says... AKA Celia Can Read

Will it rain?!


----------



## *DrDLN* (dr.s.dhillon)

Will there be rainbow after the rain?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Will we find the Pot'OGold at the end of the Rainbow ??


----------



## spotsmom

Are there any leprechauns (however you spell that) outside of South Bend, Indiana?


----------



## rayhensley

Remember MySpace?


----------



## Lorem Ipsum

What is that smell?


----------



## Syria Says... AKA Celia Can Read

What's with all the Comic Sans hate?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

Why are there so many songs about rainbows and what's on the other side?


----------



## geoffthomas

Why are we so confused?


----------



## Syria Says... AKA Celia Can Read

Why IS there no sunshine when she's gone?


----------



## StephenLivingston

Who will win the league?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

Are you receiving me, or are you deceiving me right now?


----------



## tsilver

Are you inebriated Sir?


----------



## crebel

Why are people who play the flute called flautists?


----------



## telracs

crebel said:


> Why are people who play the flute called flautists?


what would you call 'em?


----------



## crebel

scarlet said:


> what would you call 'em?


Doesn't flutist sound more logical?


----------



## Tippy

Perhaps that is how spelling evolves!


----------



## telracs

crebel said:


> Doesn't flutist sound more logical?


did you just use the "L" word?


----------



## rayhensley

Is it okay for a man to cry during Titanic?


----------



## John Dax

rayhensley said:


> Is it okay for a man to cry during Titanic?


Do you mean during the movie, or the men that were on the actual Titanic?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Shouldn't Rose have shared her raft with Jack ??


----------



## telracs

NapCat said:


> Shouldn't Rose have shared her raft with Jack ??


How did Rose survive?


----------



## kaotickitten

Why did that door float?


----------



## Susan in VA

Why wouldn't it, if it's made of wood?


----------



## kaotickitten

Why didn't the other doors float than?


----------



## JeanneM

If they call vision "eyesight" why don't they call hearing "earsound?"


----------



## Alle Meine Entchen

Did you know that Russell Stover's has an outlet store?


Spoiler



We went this weekend and bought 8 lbs of "seconds" ie, ones that weren't pretty enough to make the cut


----------



## Barbiedull

Alle Meine Entchen said:


> Did you know that Russell Stover's has an outlet store?
> 
> 
> Spoiler
> 
> 
> 
> We went this weekend and bought 8 lbs of "seconds" ie, ones that weren't pretty enough to make the cut


Did they taste pretty enough?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

Alle Meine Entchen said:


> Did you know that Russell Stover's has an outlet store?
> 
> 
> Spoiler
> 
> 
> 
> We went this weekend and bought 8 lbs of "seconds" ie, ones that weren't pretty enough to make the cut


Do they have an online outlet as well?


----------



## *DrDLN* (dr.s.dhillon)

Is electronic in ebooks from electrons?


----------



## Syria Says... AKA Celia Can Read

Why am I so nervous about going to the VA office (for the first time ever) tomorrow?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

Why did I get dragged into the middle of this?


----------



## geoffthomas

Am I stuck in the middle with you?


----------



## telracs

when is the system gonna be back up?


----------



## rayhensley

What ever happened to that 3rd X-Files movie??


----------



## *DrDLN* (dr.s.dhillon)

When is it going to stop raining?


----------



## kaotickitten

Is there other weather, other than rain?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

DOH ! WOT ??


----------



## Tip10

Why do they have to ask your name when you call a psychic hotline?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

It is the weekend yet?


----------



## *DrDLN* (dr.s.dhillon)

What keeps you in high spirits?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

What spirits keep you high ?


----------



## kaotickitten

What time is to early?


----------



## geoffthomas

will there be a Sunday this week?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

Why does it happen?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

geoffthomas said:


> will there be a Sunday this week?


Should we even check the "Thump" Thread ??


----------



## kaotickitten

Why do we say why?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

Can you believe this?


----------



## *DrDLN* (dr.s.dhillon)

NapCat said:


> What spirits keep you high ?


Gin and tonic with small peace of lemon or lime. Having it outside in N. California.


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Who would have thought being a nasty old man would be so richly rewarding ??


----------



## lpking

Why does it have to rain so much in late May?


----------



## *DrDLN* (dr.s.dhillon)

lpking said:


> Why does it have to rain so much in late May?


Because it is good for plants. What is the problem with May showers?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

*DrDln* (dr.s.dhillon) said:


> Because it is good for plants. What is the problem with May showers?


Will it keep the June bugs away?

Even with all this late May rain, will we be facing a drought again this summer?


----------



## Annalog

With our spring drought and no rain in May, will we still get rain in July? When will monsoon start in southern Arizona?


----------



## Bogbuilder

Would an albino be a suitable girl/boyfriend for someone who was scared of ghosts?


----------



## lpking

Does anybody really know what time it is?


----------



## Bogbuilder

Would you let yourself be menaced by evil clown dwarfs for a whole year if you knew you could get a real lightsaber at the end of it?


----------



## telracs

lpking said:


> Does anybody really know what time it is?


Does anybody care?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Why are "Rollback" prices higher than regular price ??


----------



## telracs

Cobbie said:


> Why wouldn't you let yourself be menaced by evil clown dwarfs for a whole year if you knew you could get a real lightsaber at the end of it?


Because i don't like clowns?
Because dwarfs shouldn't be evil?
Because menacing is illegal?
Or because no one wants me to have a lightsaber?


----------



## lpking

scarlet said:


> Does anybody care?


Would it be worthwhile going to a lyrics site to check whether that should be, "Does anybody really care?" ;-)


----------



## Bogbuilder

Cobbie said:


> Why wouldn't you let yourself be menaced by evil clown dwarfs for a whole year if you knew you could get a real lightsaber at the end of it?


Well, exactly - but you'd be surprised at the number of people who don't want to be menaced by evil clown dwarfs for a whole year even if they could get a real lightsaber out of it (see post by Scarlet, for example)

I would do anything for a real-life lightsaber. I wanna red Sith one.


----------



## spotsmom

Scarlet, the thought of you with a lightsaber is truly frightening.


----------



## Alle Meine Entchen

was Rod Stewart ever sexy?


----------



## rayhensley

Do people think David Bowie is sexay?


----------



## spotsmom

Nope (but I'm old!).

Now, George Clooney, that's sexy!


----------



## crebel

Alle Meine Entchen said:


> was Rod Stewart ever sexy?


Yes?



rayhensley said:


> Do people think David Bowie is sexay?


No?



spotsmom said:


> Now, George Clooney, that's sexy!


A million times YES?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Do you think my tractor's sexy?


----------



## Bogbuilder

rayhensley said:


> Do people think David Bowie is sexay?


I once dated an ex-girlfriend of David Bowie.

She was sexy.

But a bit mad, it has to be said :-S


----------



## geoffthomas

All remarks are supposed to be questions, aren't they?


----------



## tsilver

Who chose the question mark


----------



## telracs

geoffthomas said:


> All remarks are supposed to be questions, aren't they?


should i send some "reminder" PMs?


----------



## *DrDLN* (dr.s.dhillon)

Do all people believe in the same god?


----------



## spotsmom

Why does lightning strike some places and not others?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

Why does the postman always ring twice?


----------



## spotsmom

Does anyone really know what time it is?


----------



## Ann in Arlington

^^^^How many times has that question been asked in this thread?^^^^


----------



## telracs

Who's keeping score?


----------



## spotsmom

Why can't newbies be excused for not knowing the previous thousand questions?


----------



## lpking

spotsmom said:


> Why can't newbies be excused for not knowing the previous thousand questions?


Why am I now blushing for having asked the identical offending question referred to by the quoted fellow-newbie, perhaps twenty messages upthread?


----------



## telracs

didn't someone tell me to read more than just the two posts above mine in the word association thread?


----------



## spotsmom

Has anyone ever asked me to quit laughing?


----------



## telracs

spotsmom said:


> Has anyone ever asked me to quit laughing?


would it do any good if i did?


----------



## spotsmom

Would you be using a lightsaber?


----------



## telracs

spotsmom said:


> Would you be using a lightsaber?


is the year of menacing dwarves over?


----------



## spotsmom

Has the Hobbit really started filming?


----------



## lpking

Are we ready for the Dead Parrot sketch?


----------



## tsilver

Can someone be so ugly that they are cute?


----------



## Bogbuilder

You know, there's nothing wrong with just making a statement here and then just putting a question mark at the end to sort of turn it into a question anyway, I'm sure?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

Why are you talking crazy?


----------



## spotsmom

What are the 7 habits of highly effective dwarves?


----------



## Annalog

spotsmom said:


> What are the 7 habits of highly effective dwarves?


Would that be the habits of sharpening their saws so that they can synergize to proactively understand the goal of putting first things first so that they can win/win while using light sabers?


----------



## crebel

Can't random questions randomly repeat?


----------



## spotsmom

Do dwarves have lightsabers or axes?


----------



## Annalog

Would it depend on which galaxy they lived in?


----------



## spotsmom

Do chickens love roosters?


----------



## Annalog

Do geese love ganders?


----------



## spotsmom

Why do Canada geese mate for life?


----------



## lpking

Is it possible to achieve a truly random question?


----------



## telracs

does the song get better or worse on repeated listenings?


----------



## spotsmom

Does Jesse Stone seriously need some high power anti-depressants?


----------



## telracs

Who is Jesse Stone?


----------



## spotsmom

Is Jesse Stone a Tom Selleck character who's a former police chief in Massachusetts?


----------



## *DrDLN* (dr.s.dhillon)

Are we spending too much time watching TV?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Is TV spending too much time watching us ??


----------



## tsilver

Is this real life?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

Can you define real?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

Where do you like to read?


----------



## *DrDLN* (dr.s.dhillon)

Do you like to read on the kindle?


----------



## geoffthomas

When do we get there?


----------



## Susan in VA

Aren't you there yet, Geoff?


----------



## spotsmom

Can we stop because I have to go to the bathroom?


----------



## telracs

spotsmom said:


> Can we stop because I have to go to the bathroom?


why didn't you go before we left the house?


----------



## Susan in VA

Maybe she didn't need to go then?


----------



## telracs

could you at LEAST try to be helpful?


----------



## crebel

Can't we all just get along?


----------



## Susan in VA

scarlet said:


> could you at LEAST try to be helpful?


You talkin' to me?


----------



## spotsmom

Can you disown your relatives?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

spotsmom said:


> Can you disown your relatives?


Have you ever tried to "lose" a cat !??


----------



## spotsmom

Is it fair to take a cat out in the country and dump it?


----------



## geoffthomas

Has your cat ever taken you out in the country and left you?


----------



## spotsmom

Why would anyone want to run for President?


----------



## geoffthomas

And where is your nose running to?


----------



## spotsmom

If a dog has a dry nose, is he sick?


----------



## crebel

To where has the green donut for my grandson's Fisher Price stacker disappeared?


----------



## telracs

crebel said:


> To where has the green donut for my grandson's Fisher Price stacker disappeared?


Green donut?


Spoiler



burp


----------



## spotsmom

Why do cops eat donuts?


----------



## telracs

spotsmom said:


> Why do cops eat donuts?


because they're yummy?


----------



## spotsmom

Could it be for the sugar jolt?


----------



## spotsmom

Is anyone going to keep this thread going?


----------



## telracs

what, we can't go a day with no questions?


----------



## spotsmom

Can a Kindle fit in an evening bag?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

Who is making breakfast?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

Are you a morning person, too?


----------



## *DrDLN* (dr.s.dhillon)

Why are there wars all over the world?


----------



## geoffthomas

Why isn't eveyone nice, like us?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Is it possible that KINDLES make people nice ?


----------



## spotsmom

Is a hammock a true necessity for enjoying the summer?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Is life worth living without a hammock ??


----------



## spotsmom

Is a spreader bar hammock better than the kind that envelops you?


----------



## tsilver

What is toe jam?


----------



## spotsmom

Is it the stuff that moves down from your navel?


----------



## Susan in VA

spotsmom said:


> Is a spreader bar hammock better than the kind that envelops you?


By "envelops you", do you mean the kind that you sink into and can't get up out of without either asking for help or tipping it over and landing on the ground?


----------



## spotsmom

How do we know which of the nine lives a cat is on?


----------



## Susan in VA

Did you have to ask a question that's going to keep me awake wondering about it?


----------



## geoffthomas

Will the sun come out tomorrow?


----------



## spotsmom

Did Sarah Palin really say that Paul Revere took his ride in order to warn the British?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Didn't the British invade Alaska??


----------



## tsilver

Isn't Alaska baked?


----------



## Susan in VA

tsilver said:


> Isn't Alaska baked?


Are you saying maybe the heat got to her?


----------



## rayhensley

What is the Ego mind?


----------



## Teresa Morgan

Why did I plant regular sized tomatoes instead of the grape tomatoes I meant to plant?

Teresa


----------



## NapCat (retired)

A piano makes beautiful music even when not being played


----------



## spotsmom

Is the decision hard to make because somehow it doesn't feel right?


----------



## Annalog

NapCat said:


> A piano makes beautiful music even when not being played


Is that a question in the kitten's eyes? Or the shape of the tail?


----------



## spotsmom

Does being an employee mean virtually the same as being a slave?


----------



## Susan in VA

Is that one of the shopping cats, and did she buy herself a piano?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

Is the lady a tramp?


----------



## spotsmom

Wasn't Tramp the dog on My Three Sons?


----------



## Susan in VA

Isn't that spaghetti scene from_ Lady and the Tramp_ just the cutest thing ever?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Susan in VA said:


> Is that one of the shopping cats, and did she buy herself a piano?


Do you really need to ask ??


----------



## spotsmom

If one is enough, why have two?


----------



## *DrDLN* (dr.s.dhillon)

Do you really think congressman Weiner should resign due to ethical reasons?


----------



## geoffthomas

How did my coffee get cold?


----------



## spotsmom

Why do you usually only see one shoe on the side of the highway?


----------



## lpking

Why does grass grow so fast here in early June?


----------



## spotsmom

Why do I have to go to work on the first 75 degree day?


----------



## Susan in VA

Aren't you forgetting a question, spotsmom?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

geoffthomas said:


> How did my coffee get cold?


With this heat, you didn't want an iced coffee?


----------



## spotsmom

Why can't I remember the question I came up with last night?


----------



## Susan in VA

Would it help if I reminded you it was about birds?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Birds? Where?


----------



## Susan in VA

Weren't we talking about the one in your back yard?


----------



## telracs

what would happen if i smushed the butterfly whose wing flap starts the whole chaos change of events?


----------



## SimonWood

where are my keys?


----------



## telracs

why do we say "chaos" as if it's a bad thing?


----------



## spotsmom

Do peacocks fly?


----------



## SimonWood

why do politicians think they aren't going to get caught?


----------



## spotsmom

Why don't politicians know basic American history?


----------



## telracs

spotsmom said:


> Why can't I remember the question I came up with last night?


why didn't you post it last night?


----------



## spotsmom

Can you post two questions right in a row?


----------



## telracs

spotsmom said:


> Can you post two questions right in a row?


Like I haven't?


----------



## spotsmom

Can I skip work if it's the first beautiful day of the year?


----------



## telracs

what's with my sudden spurt of physics book buying?


----------



## spotsmom

Is physics related to physical education?


----------



## SimonWood

spotsmom said:


> Can you post two questions right in a row?


why not?


----------



## spotsmom

If you were a dog, what breed would you be?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

When will the waiting ever end


----------



## telracs

Does anybody know where I can get a patience transplant?

I'm all out.


----------



## spotsmom

Why do possums have hairless tails?


----------



## telracs

spotsmom said:


> If you were a dog, what breed would you be?


Is it bad that I read the word as "bread" not "breed"?


----------



## spotsmom

Do all Golden Retrievers love to eat (steal) bread?


----------



## SimonWood

Why are people confused by the purpose of a stop sign?


----------



## Susan in VA

How can people hold a grudge for years for something that was unintentional?


----------



## Brianna Lee McKenzie

Don't we forgive our dogs faster than we forgive people?


----------



## spotsmom

Do our cats ever forgive us?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Do our cats take the time to Thank us ??


----------



## Valmore Daniels

Do we own cats, or do they own us?


----------



## loonlover

Don't cats have servants, not owners?


----------



## telracs

Why don't Klingons use question marks?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Will the Klingon Empire be brought down by poor punctuation ?


----------



## spotsmom

Is it always true that the needs of the many outweigh the needs of the one?


----------



## telracs

spotsmom said:


> Is it always true that the needs of the many outweigh the needs of the one?


Isn't it true that the many are in fact just a bunch of ones?
So then how can you decide which "one" is the least important?
Or is it a decision that can only be made when YOU are that one?


----------



## spotsmom

Does my brain hurt from trying to figure out Scarlet's question(s)?


----------



## telracs

can you tell that i've thought of the question a bit?


----------



## lpking

Why does it have to rain again, when it's supposed to be almost summer?


----------



## spotsmom

How many suits does the President have?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

Did you read any good books this weekend?


----------



## Amy Corwin

Will common sense ever, truly, become common?


----------



## *DrDLN* (dr.s.dhillon)

Are you satisfied with your health?


----------



## spotsmom

Does the weather always turn nice on the Monday following a rainy weekend?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Does YOUR health plan cover "twitter-porn" recovery programs ?


----------



## spotsmom

Did you know the City of Portland, OR now covers transgender surgery for its employees?


----------



## spotsmom

Why are grocery store receipts at least twice as long as they need to be stating miscellaneous junk that I don't care about?


----------



## Susan in VA

Why does the County not realize that if they keep providing non-essential publications in other languages than English, it reduces the incentive to learn English?  Whatever happened to sink-or-swim?


----------



## telracs

spotsmom said:


> Why are grocery store receipts at least twice as long as they need to be stating miscellaneous junk that I don't care about?


whad'ya buy?


----------



## spotsmom

Does New York City have "real", i.e., large grocery stores?


----------



## telracs

spotsmom said:


> Does New York City have "real", i.e., large grocery stores?


Didn't we have this conversation?
And didn't I provide photographic proof that we do?


----------



## Susan in VA

Then where do they hide them?


----------



## spotsmom

Why did people laugh when I asked about NYC grocery stores?  Do I only envision what I see on tv/read?


----------



## geoffthomas

Does anyone actually LIVE in NYC?


----------



## telracs

when did it become pick on NYC time?


----------



## spotsmom

Is it because it's so easy to pick on Los Angeles?


----------



## *DrDLN* (dr.s.dhillon)

Is there anyone to answer truly random questions?


----------



## spotsmom

How does a bee get to be the Queen?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

spotsmom said:


> Why are grocery store receipts at least twice as long as they need to be stating miscellaneous junk that I don't care about?


And why are they printed on thermal paper which isn't recyclable?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

Why does it feel like I'm also getting a sinus infection to go with my strep/pharyngitis/tonsillitis?


----------



## spotsmom

Is it ok to fall asleep at your desk at work?


----------



## Susan in VA

Depends; are you an air traffic controller?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Why do hummingbirds hum?


----------



## Susan in VA

Perhaps they're imitating cat purrs?


----------



## telracs

NapCat said:


> Why do hummingbirds hum?


because they forgot the words?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

It's past midnight; do you know where your dog is?


----------



## spotsmom

Why do the titles of many of the Sunshine Deals books end with the word "deck"?


----------



## telracs

Don't you know that fortune cookies are really blank and it's psychics in the kitchen reading your mind and making suggestions of what you see?


----------



## spotsmom

Has anyone ever left their heart in Duluth?


----------



## Vegas_Asian

what is open at this time of night......?


----------



## Courtney Cantrell

Why oh why oh why have I not gone to bed yet?


----------



## Vegas_Asian

why can't i go to bed at a decent time? why don't the good ideas come during the day?


----------



## spotsmom

Why can't you buy an iTouch with 3G, or is that model called an iPhone?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

How did we ever live without all our gadgets ?


----------



## telracs

NapCat said:


> How did we ever live without all our gadgets ?


quite well?


----------



## Brianna Lee McKenzie

Didn't our parents live without them?


----------



## tsilver

Aren't gadgets cool?


----------



## spotsmom

Wasn't the western part of the US settled without a cell phone?


----------



## telracs

why is an Orthodox Jewish musical group listed on amazon as Christian/Gospel?


----------



## spotsmom

Why do husbands fall asleep in front of the television with the remote control clutched in a death grip?


----------



## Vegas_Asian

Speaking of gadgets. Guess who got an Android phone tonight?


----------



## herocious

Can matter really never be created or destroyed?


----------



## spotsmom

Is Wesley Crusher really in another time continuum?


----------



## telracs

spotsmom said:


> Is Wesley Crusher really in another time continuum?


wasn't he always in a different dimension?


----------



## Bogbuilder

Who is Wesley Crusher anyway?


----------



## spotsmom

Is Earth really one of Wesley Crusher's science experiments?


----------



## spotsmom

Is it common that an office becomes more and more empty as Friday progresses?


----------



## telracs

spotsmom said:


> Is Earth really one of Wesley Crusher's science experiments?


Isn't Earth really just a Reg Barclay hologram program?


----------



## spotsmom

Does the water from crashing waves ever get way out to sea again?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

Anyone see where I left my keys?


----------



## Tip10

Aren't they on the board?


----------



## *DrDLN* (dr.s.dhillon)

Is economy in the western countries going down?


----------



## spotsmom

Why are countries being asked to help pay for Greece?


----------



## JFHilborne

Should publishers fear chapter 11


----------



## Bogbuilder

spotsmom said:


> Why are countries being asked to help pay for Greece?


Is it because we don't want them bringing us gifts?


----------



## telracs

who broke netflix?


----------



## spotsmom

What was the name of Dick and Jane's cat?


----------



## telracs

spotsmom said:


> What was the name of Dick and Jane's cat?


fluffy?


----------



## spotsmom

Tell me it was Puff?


----------



## telracs

spotsmom said:


> Tell me it was Puff?


did you google it?


----------



## spotsmom

Would I google something like that?


----------



## tsilver

If I want to be thin, do I really need to eat less?


----------



## Barbiedull

scarlet said:


> who broke netflix?


Was it YOU?


Spoiler



When I finally got it to work, I fell asleep within 10 minutes!


----------



## crebel

spotsmom said:


> Tell me it was Puff?





scarlet said:


> did you google it?


Did you know if you do google it, Puff is correct?


----------



## telracs

how many stupid things am i supposed to put up with before I go screaming for the hills?


----------



## Barbiedull

scarlet said:


> how many stupid things am i supposed to put up with before I go screaming for the hills?


 Isn't it supposed to be _run_ for the hills?


----------



## crebel

scarlet said:


> how many stupid things am i supposed to put up with before I go screaming for the hills?


May I join you when you go?


----------



## telracs

Barbiedull said:


> Isn't it supposed to be _run_ for the hills?


Do you really think it's a good idea to mess with me today?



crebel said:


> May I join you when you go?


Will you bring some food?


----------



## Annalog

If the hills are far away, would it be better to take a car, a train, a plane, or a flying saucer than to run?


----------



## spotsmom

Is a flying saucer a normal mode of transportation for you?

(I always thought it was head for the hills)


----------



## telracs

spotsmom said:


> Is a flying saucer a normal mode of transportation for you?


haven't you seen my space ship avatar?


----------



## spotsmom

Does Scarlet also ride a broom?


----------



## telracs

spotsmom said:


> Does Scarlet also ride a broom?


are you calling me a witch?



Spoiler



if you are, i want to be one of modwitch's witches.


----------



## spotsmom

Is a witch better than other labels?


----------



## telracs

spotsmom said:


> Is a witch better than other labels?


doesn't that depend on the labels?

dry clean only?

hand wash?

light starch?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

Are we, are we, are we ... are we ourselves?

(The Fixx lyrics)


----------



## geoffthomas

Is there a real answer to that question?


----------



## telracs

Valmore Daniels said:


> Are we, are we, are we ... are we ourselves?
> 
> (The Fixx lyrics)


Are we, we are, are we, we are the waiting unknown?



Spoiler



Greenday, I believe


.


----------



## spotsmom

Are you comfortable with the unknown?


----------



## Lanie Jordan

Are we there yet? (I've been waiting to say that for eons, lol.)


----------



## spotsmom

Can I drive?


----------



## loonlover

Can I take my scooter outside and play?


----------



## spotsmom

Do I really have to take a bath?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Do I hafta' eat all the Lima Beans ?


----------



## spotsmom

Do you know what succatash is?


----------



## Robert Clear

Why does spellcheck hate me?


----------



## Amy Corwin

When can I retire?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

Are you done?


----------



## geoffthomas

Have you started?


----------



## spotsmom

Oh, that?


----------



## Susan in VA

Who, me?


----------



## tsilver

Is there more?


----------



## telracs

want some watermelon?


----------



## spotsmom

Is fried chicken good for you?


----------



## telracs

spotsmom said:


> Is fried chicken good for you?


No, but do you think I care?


----------



## spotsmom

Is there anything else in life more important than ice cream?


----------



## Brianna Lee McKenzie

Will you see fireworks when you kiss someone on the fourth of July?


----------



## spotsmom

Are some people boring?


----------



## Bogbuilder

Is this a boring question?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Where did all the birds go??


----------



## Valmore Daniels

Did we just go straight from winter to mosquito?


----------



## telracs

mosquito?


----------



## spotsmom

Is there something that really works to keep mosquitoes away?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Why do multi-legged creatures feel they can move in with me


----------



## spotsmom

Is it because you're such an easy touch?


----------



## telracs

why did an episode from the 3rd season of Dr. Who just download to my iTunes?


----------



## spotsmom

Who is Dr. Who?


----------



## Tip10

NapCat said:


> Why do multi-legged creatures feel they can move in with me


Are there any single legged creatures


----------



## *DrDLN* (dr.s.dhillon)

Tip10 said:


> Are there any single legged creatures


Have someone seen any single legged? Until then NO.


----------



## Bogbuilder

Can water die?


----------



## tsilver

do female preying mantises always eat their mates?


----------



## spotsmom

Are two more fun than one?


----------



## geoffthomas

Why has this thread gone on for 196 pages and 4890 posts?


----------



## telracs

why don't you just have that phone surgically implanted?


----------



## spotsmom

Is texting destroying the ability to spell correctly?


----------



## Tip10

Is texting destroying the ability to communicate effectively verbally?


----------



## *Sandy Harper*

Are spelling checkers destroying our ability to spell?


----------



## spotsmom

Should cell phones have any function other than to make/receive calls?


----------



## tsilver

Do geniuses have stupid moments?


----------



## Bogbuilder

Is someone who can successfully pretend to be a genius actaully as clever as a real genius?


----------



## geoffthomas

What is the difference between genius and insanity?


----------



## hamerfan

Who put the ram in the rama lama ding dong?


----------



## *DrDLN* (dr.s.dhillon)

Is this rama same as Rama and Sita in Indian epic?


----------



## spotsmom

Do shortcuts make long delays?


----------



## telracs

have you seen my cupcake?


----------



## spotsmom

Are vacations ever long enough?


----------



## telracs

how do YOU define "juke box" musicals?


----------



## spotsmom

Is that when a left handed bass player is represented by a right handed actor/musician?


----------



## telracs

wasn't that just a weird tribute band/concert?


----------



## spotsmom

Don't people have any respect for Paul McCartney?


----------



## Todd Young

Am I a watermelon?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

What's next ?


----------



## spotsmom

Do I hafta?


----------



## Syria Says... AKA Celia Can Read

Why did I go to Wal Mart on a _holiday_ weekend?!


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

Did I miss anything?


----------



## Syria Says... AKA Celia Can Read

Did you forget to breathe again?


----------



## spotsmom

Isn't there something wonderful about lying in a hammock, listening to horses blow and snort, and the sound of hawks in the sky?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Will there be hammocks in heaven??


----------



## spotsmom

Why are fireworks authorized in the middle of fire season?


----------



## telracs

what would have happened if the vote for independence had failed?


----------



## *Sandy Harper*

Why is money so important to live today?


----------



## telracs

*Sandy Harper* said:


> Why is money so important to live today?


When hasn't it been?


----------



## spotsmom

If money is the root of all evil, where does that put greed?


----------



## tsilver

What were you in your previous life?


----------



## telracs

anybody want to chat?


----------



## spotsmom

How many previous lives have you had?


----------



## Susan in VA

Isn't there just one continuous life?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

don't we all have 9 lives??


----------



## Valmore Daniels

Is life really what you make it?


----------



## Nancy Beck

Why is the sky blue?


----------



## tsilver

Who coined the phrase "toe jam?


----------



## spotsmom

Are we as a society too quick to judge?


----------



## telracs

Cobbie said:


> What was that noise?


Pink snowbunnies?


----------



## spotsmom

Is the noise in the basement, or under your bed?


----------



## tsilver

Would it be wise to call the police or to hide under the bed?


----------



## *Sandy Harper*

Wouldn't it depend upon the situation?


----------



## spotsmom

Would Stephen King call the police?


----------



## telracs

spotsmom said:


> Would Stephen King call the police?


Or Ghostbusters?


----------



## spotsmom

Do Ghostbusters hang around cemeteries?


----------



## John Dax

spotsmom said:


> Is the noise in the basement, or under your bed?


Or is it in your head?


----------



## *Sandy Harper*

Is there such thing as ghostbusters?


----------



## geoffthomas

Do you have ghosts that need busting?


----------



## tsilver

Do you have a bust?


----------



## *DrDLN* (dr.s.dhillon)

tsilver said:


> What were you in your previous life?


Aren't we always around as matter or energy?


----------



## spotsmom

What color was Stewball (the horse)?


----------



## tsilver

are you hungry enough to eat a horse?  Really?


----------



## spotsmom

Is stupidity proportional to humidity?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

Do you think it will rain?


----------



## tsilver

Did I have enough ice cream?


----------



## spotsmom

Can you ever have enough ice cream?


----------



## telracs

are you asking me?


----------



## spotsmom

How many flavors of ice cream does Scarlet have?


----------



## telracs

spotsmom said:


> How many flavors of ice cream does Scarlet have?


want some?


Spoiler



if so, you gotta come into chat...


----------



## NapCat (retired)

scarlet said:


> want some?
> 
> 
> Spoiler
> 
> 
> 
> if so, you gotta come into chat...


Is using Ice Cream as "bait' ethical ?


----------



## telracs

why not?


----------



## spotsmom

What does "fish or cut bait" have to do with ice cream?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Is this Phishing ?


----------



## spotsmom

Are you making me question my diet?


----------



## telracs

Doesn't everything have to do with ice cream?


----------



## tsilver

and why shouldn't it?


----------



## spotsmom

Why is everyone obsessed with ice cream?


----------



## telracs

who said we're obsessed?


----------



## spotsmom

Is a Klondike Bar considered ice cream?


----------



## NapCat (retired)




----------



## spotsmom

What wouldn't I do?


----------



## telracs

what DID i do to my back this time?


----------



## Tip10

Not enough Ice Cream?


----------



## Bryan R. Dennis

Who farted?


----------



## tsilver

was it you?


----------



## spotsmom

Was it the dog?


----------



## *DrDLN* (dr.s.dhillon)

Why is it fun to be silly?


----------



## spotsmom

What kind of bird is in the hand?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

When is enough, enough?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

Can it wait?


----------



## tsilver

What was the bird doing in your hand?


----------



## spotsmom

If the boss is gone, can you take a long lunch?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

spotsmom said:


> If the boss is gone, can you take a long lunch?


Would anyone notice?


----------



## Tip10

Is maple syrup a fruit of a vegetable?


----------



## spotsmom

Will the kids remember that Sunday is Parent's Day?


----------



## geoffthomas

Will the kids remember what their parents said?


----------



## Bryan R. Dennis

Why doesn't Dunkin' Donuts ever make enough Boston Creams?


----------



## tsilver

What is a huckleberry?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

Why does the full moon attract the looneys and brings out the horrible drivers?


----------



## spotsmom

Why does the cat want to sit on the keyboard?


----------



## telracs

what sort of book is the cat writing?


----------



## spotsmom

Shall the cat write a purrfect book?


----------



## telracs

thursday night chat?


----------



## spotsmom

Feeling feisty tonight?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Feisty again ?


----------



## telracs

am i ever not feisty?


----------



## spotsmom

Are feisty people good well?


----------



## Amy Corwin

Is anyone truly sane?


----------



## spotsmom

Is "enculturate" a real word as one author thinks it is?


----------



## tsilver

Why is  your brain referred to as your noodle?


----------



## spotsmom

Is there a cure for apathy?


----------



## tsilver

Are you a movie star lover?


----------



## telracs

spotsmom said:


> Is there a cure for apathy?


does anyone care?


----------



## spotsmom

Do you?


----------



## Susan in VA

scarlet, is your back feeling better now?


----------



## tsilver

Is Saturday the best day of the week?


----------



## spotsmom

Is chat on Saturday one of the highlights of your day?


----------



## tsilver

Do you remember the poem starting:  Mondays' child is fair of face?


----------



## spotsmom

Is Wednesday's child (me) full of woe?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Who burned the chicken??


----------



## spotsmom

Who, me?


----------



## Brianna Lee McKenzie

How about a steak?


----------



## Bryan R. Dennis

Would your eyes really pop out if you sneezed without eyelids?


----------



## spotsmom

Is that an amazing question?


----------



## tsilver

or is it a stupid one?


----------



## telracs

want to hear what i did today?


Spoiler



then join me in chat....


----------



## tsilver

Did you do something bad?


----------



## geoffthomas

Do we really want to know?


----------



## telracs

when am i going to remember the sunscreen?


----------



## Tip10

Is Scarlet scarlet?


----------



## crebel

Did I miss 4 nights of chat instead of just one?


----------



## telracs

Tip10 said:


> Is Scarlet scarlet?


have you ever seen a baked scarlet Scarlet?



crebel said:


> Did I miss 4 nights of chat instead of just one?


What makes you think that?


----------



## crebel

scarlet said:


> What makes you think that?


Haven't I read postings about random Thursday, Friday, Saturday and Sunday chats last week?


----------



## geoffthomas

why have we been chatting secretly each night?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Is the "Chat-addiction" treatable ??


----------



## telracs

crebel said:


> Haven't I read postings about random Thursday, Friday, Saturday and Sunday chats last week?


Did we chat on Friday?



NapCat said:


> Is the "Chat-addiction" treatable ??


And why would I want a cure?


----------



## geoffthomas

Is it true that one can be better understood in chat than in posting?


----------



## crebel

scarlet said:


> Did we chat on Friday?


Don't you know? Isn't that my first random question? Did you have chats on Thursday, Friday, Saturday and Sunday instead of the "usual" just Saturday chat and I missed them ALL?!!

Do we need a Monday chat so I can catch up?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

What if we give it away?


----------



## tsilver

Is there an alien on these boards?


----------



## telracs

tsilver said:


> Is there an alien on these boards?


Only one?


----------



## spotsmom

crebel said:


> Don't you know? Isn't that my first random question? Did you have chats on Thursday, Friday, Saturday and Sunday instead of the "usual" just Saturday chat and I missed them ALL?!!
> 
> Do we need a Monday chat so I can catch up?


Do you need to ask Scarlet's permission?


----------



## telracs

spotsmom said:


> Do you need to ask Scarlet's permission?


can you chat without me?


----------



## spotsmom

Is chat boring, or relieving, without Scarlet?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Is it really chat without Scarlet ?


----------



## crebel

Didn't we have a "real" chat before she arrived?


----------



## geoffthomas

are we becoming obsessed with chat?


----------



## spotsmom

Why did I get paint on my new pair of expensive pants?


----------



## tsilver

what's that stuff in my refrigerator?


----------



## spotsmom

Why is the best personalized license plate I've ever seen say "YYYYY"?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Y ?


----------



## spotsmom

Y not?


----------



## crebel

Don't you think the personalized plate translates into "wise"?


----------



## tsilver

Are all of you Y's guys?


----------



## geoffthomas

What will you do tomorrow?


----------



## telracs

geoffthomas said:


> What will you do tomorrow?


have a cupcake?
get balloons?


----------



## spotsmom

Is it because it's your birthday??


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Who has a birthday today?


----------



## Amy Corwin

Who has decided not to do birthdays anymore?


----------



## tsilver

Why is the wind in the willows?


----------



## geoffthomas

Did the wind get lost?


----------



## telracs

Amy Corwin said:


> Who has decided not to do birthdays anymore?


why would anybody do that?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Where are the presents??


----------



## telracs

NapCat said:


> Where are the presents??


Presents? there are presents?


----------



## geoffthomas

Celebrate?


----------



## tsilver

Did the Indians invent popcorn?


----------



## telracs

do we really need presents to celebrate?


----------



## geoffthomas

Do we just need fireworks, confetti, margaritas and chocolate cake? (If I remember correctly)


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

Can I go back to WDW?


----------



## tsilver

What does the tooth fairy do with all those teeth?


----------



## Richardcrasta

Should we really go on meeting like this?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Why spiders ??


----------



## spotsmom

Would it be easier with snakes?


----------



## tsilver

How did those cloth coverings for your feet get called socks?


----------



## spotsmom

Someone couldn't translate "stockings"?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

OH !  Why bother


----------



## spotsmom

Isn't "bother" one of Winnie the Pooh's words?


----------



## geoffthomas

Where DID I put the honey-pot?


----------



## spotsmom

Will there be a happy ending?


----------



## tsilver

How can a smile be your umbrella?


----------



## telracs

spotsmom said:


> Will there be a happy ending?


Is it a romance?


----------



## geoffthomas

Was that a kiss?


----------



## tsilver

Are you asking or demanding?


----------



## telracs

when did "


Spoiler



pimping


" become such a popular word?

and how do i convince authors that if they use it, i'm not gonna buy their stuff?


----------



## spotsmom

Do they not get it?


----------



## Annalog

Can wet chickens fly?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

Do penguins ever get tired of the cold?


----------



## tsilver

Is a sexy penguin hot-blooded?


----------



## geoffthomas

Is a hot-blooded penguin sexy?


----------



## spotsmom

Why do penguins wear tuxedos?


----------



## tsilver

Are penguins big show-offs?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

Should I make a second bowl of cinnamon cream of wheat?


----------



## geoffthomas

Will you share the second bowl with the sexy penguins?


----------



## tsilver

Why are humorists on Not Quite Kindle and why do I like them?


----------



## spotsmom

Are Kindle readers, as a group, more intelligent than non-readers?


----------



## geoffthomas

Doesn't it stand to reason that one is more intelligent if one can read?


----------



## Tip10

Doesn't that depend upon whether one believes everything one reads?


----------



## tsilver

Who's been nibbling on the moon's green cheese?


----------



## *DrDLN* (dr.s.dhillon)

Is debit ceiling really that big a deal?


----------



## spotsmom

What is a Debit ceiling?


----------



## tsilver

Why can't someone answer?


----------



## spotsmom

Why can't someone call?


----------



## geoffthomas

Can't you just write a check to pay for it?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

If you put it on a government credit card, will you get travel miles ?


----------



## spotsmom

Do cats get credit card invitations?


----------



## tsilver

Do they have to be good mousers?


----------



## spotsmom

Does a dead mouse count as a payment?


----------



## telracs

spotsmom said:


> Do cats get credit card invitations?


Maybe you should ask napcat?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

And if so, which are the last ones?


----------



## spotsmom

Is it ok to lie to your new doctor about the date of your last tetanus shot?


----------



## Brianna Lee McKenzie

Will they ever re-make E.T.?


----------



## tsilver

Is it better to pass gas or to suppress it?


----------



## geoffthomas

does that qualify as Too Much Information?


----------



## Brianna Lee McKenzie

I hear that gas is $3.79 now


----------



## telracs

so, it's saturday night, wanna chat?


----------



## Brianna Lee McKenzie

meet ya there?


----------



## telracs

Brianna Lee McKenzie said:


> meet ya there?


where are you?


----------



## tsilver

Why do we have so many toes?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

NapCat said:


> If you put it on a government credit card, will you get travel miles ?





Spoiler



No. But IIRC you can use your personal cc to get the travel miles or other perks and then file the claim



What should I order from Schwans?


----------



## tsilver

what should I order from the bakery?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

tsilver said:


> what should I order from the bakery?


Do you like sunflower multi-grain bread?


----------



## tsilver

do you like to gossip?


----------



## Alle Meine Entchen

should I get a 2nd bowl of ice cream?


----------



## tsilver

should I dance a jig in the city square?


----------



## loonlover

How long should I let Intinst doze in his recliner?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Should Intinst doze in his recliner while we are waiting for more of his humorous postings ?


----------



## telracs

why wouldn't we let sleeping intinst's lie?


----------



## intinst

Yes, why wouldn't we?


----------



## telracs

who woke him?


----------



## rayhensley

What are we talking about??


----------



## spotsmom

Can the Monday workday be cancelled for lack of interest?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Who's interested ?


----------



## tsilver

My number is up?  How did you know my number?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

Did you leave it laying around?


----------



## PatrickWalts

Have you been playing around with that murder kit I keep in my trunk?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

When can I come out of the trunk?


----------



## tsilver

Has the timer been set?


----------



## Susan in VA

If my kitchen timer works nine out of ten times, does that make it unreliable enough to throw away?  Or should I just write off one of every ten things that I bake?


----------



## tsilver

Wouldn't it be better to eat junk food?


----------



## CCrooks

Did you see the movie Super Size Me?


----------



## tsilver

What are you insinuating?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

Can someone get me another java chip frappachino?


----------



## tsilver

Will you get mad if I had the last one?


----------



## vikingwarrior22

That is mine...isn't it...isn't it...


----------



## *DrDLN* (dr.s.dhillon)

Are you fighting over what many call junk food?


----------



## geoffthomas

Why shouldn't we answer that?


----------



## tsilver

ah yes, why shouldn't we?


----------



## Susan in VA

Maybe because somebody would tell Cobbie something she doesn't want to hear?


----------



## telracs

who would do that?

and isn't it true, if it's junk, it isn't food?


----------



## geoffthomas

Then why don't YOU tell her?


----------



## rayhensley

Didn't I see this _On Whose Line is It Anyway?_


----------



## tsilver

Were you looking through your other glasses?


----------



## telracs

when did i become THAT person?


----------



## geoffthomas

Are you THAT person?


----------



## geoffthomas

Are we talking about the same person?


----------



## *DrDLN* (dr.s.dhillon)

When does food become junk?


----------



## geoffthomas

When it has been "processed"?


----------



## rayhensley

I'm gonna go eat cheesecake now?


----------



## tsilver

Do you enjoy sucking on ice cubes?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

Is _Torchwood:Miracle Day_ ever going to get back to alien roots?


----------



## tsilver

Will the sun really come out tomorrow, Annie?


----------



## geoffthomas

Will I ever find the answer?


----------



## tsilver

Will you keep cheating?


----------



## gina1230

Is the phone ringing?


----------



## Susan in VA

Can I ignore it?


----------



## loonlover

Why not?


----------



## tsilver

Will my nose keep growing?


----------



## geoffthomas

Did you stop lying?


----------



## D/W

Are we there yet?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

Brain freeze?


----------



## tsilver

Did you pluck the chicken?


----------



## Susan in VA

If I allow myself an unhealthy treat today (just because!), should it be potato chips or ice cream?


----------



## tsilver

Am I blue?


----------



## Susan in VA

If I put on rose-colored glasses, will you be purple?


----------



## telracs

doesn't everyone deserve ice cream?


----------



## Susan in VA

If the supermarket sells only Clorox brand bleach and their house brand version of the same stuff, but the label says "use only _non-chlorine_ bleach", what the heck am I supposed to use? Is there even such a thing?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

Susan in VA said:


> If the supermarket sells only Clorox brand bleach and their house brand version of the same stuff, but the label says "use only _non-chlorine_ bleach", what the heck am I supposed to use? Is there even such a thing?


Isn't Clorox 2 non-chlorine bleach?


----------



## geoffthomas

Did I use bleach on my non-whites?


----------



## Susan in VA

mom133d (aka Liz) said:


> Isn't Clorox 2 non-chlorine bleach?


Is it really? Maybe I should look at the labels?


----------



## rayhensley

Did I remember to buy shampoo?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Did someone water the ficus??


----------



## spotsmom

Is a ficus a tree or a bush?


----------



## tsilver

are you for real?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

What time is the 3:00 parade?


----------



## tsilver

What are you up to?


----------



## geoffthomas

did I miss the 3:00 o'clock parade?


----------



## D/W

Do blonds really have more fun?


----------



## tsilver

isn't it more true for brunettes?


----------



## kchughez

Why can't we open both sides of the milk carton?


----------



## geoffthomas

Is it forbidden?


----------



## Brianna Lee McKenzie

How do you know when sour cream goes bad?


----------



## tsilver

Why are you asking?


----------



## Susan in VA

Are they moving?


----------



## loonlover

They're not supposed to move?


----------



## loonlover

At a snail's pace?


----------



## geoffthomas

You have snails in your sour cream?


----------



## telracs

wanna chat?


----------



## tsilver

about snails?


----------



## Tip10

Did you know Sear's named their car top carrier after snails? 
X-Cargo?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

Does Sears still sell them?


----------



## geoffthomas

What did I come in here for?


----------



## Tip10

Is it reasonably unreasonable not to have a reason?


----------



## Grace Elliot

(Semi serious question.) 
How does woodpeckers pecking, help get the grubs out?
Does the drilling stun the bugs or something? 
Why dont woodpeckers get headaches?
How would we know if woodpeckers got headaches?

OK - that's several questions...but I need answers!


----------



## D/W

Where did I put my eyeglasses? I can't see.


----------



## telracs

DreamWeaver said:


> Where did I put my eyeglasses? I can't see.


then how are you typing?

and did you check the top of your head?


----------



## Brianna Lee McKenzie

DreamWeaver said:


> Where did I put my eyeglasses? I can't see.


Do you need glasses to find your glasses?


----------



## tsilver

Are you being silly?


----------



## *Sandy Harper*

Isn't it fun to be silly?


----------



## tsilver

Is everyone in your family silly?


----------



## Tip10

isn't silly string?


----------



## D/W

Can you see my point?


----------



## geoffthomas

Why do I have such a headache?
Could it be from banging my head against a tree?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

Want to join me banging my head against the wall?


----------



## Tip10

We have a Harvey here, does that make you the Wallbanger?


----------



## tsilver

Are you serving drinks?


----------



## Grace Elliot

Is that thunder I hear, or my husband snoring?


----------



## geoffthomas

Is there a reason....?


----------



## Vegas_Asian

Why ask me?

Sent from my Desire HD using Tapatalk


----------



## tsilver

Why don't you call


----------



## loonlover

Did you forget something?


----------



## gina1230

Why do elephants never forget?


----------



## tsilver

Don't you think you should ask an elephant?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

Can someone come clean my house?


----------



## Nick Wastnage

Do fish sleep?


----------



## crebel

Did I really eat my way thru the State Fair?


----------



## D/W

What do I want to eat for lunch today?


----------



## tsilver

Should I have more chocolate?


----------



## *DrDLN* (dr.s.dhillon)

Is chocolate good for you?


----------



## Susan in VA

Is that a serious question??


----------



## telracs

when are you gonna join chat?


----------



## Susan in VA

Don't I get to make some posts and answer some PM's first?


----------



## telracs

why are you still posting if you said you were too tired for chat?


----------



## Susan in VA

Didn't you check the time of the post? 


Spoiler



That was before coming to chat, not after.


----------



## Nick Wastnage

Did you look in the fridge?


----------



## tsilver

Who likes Mondays?


----------



## telracs

Susan in VA said:


> Didn't you check the time of the post?
> 
> 
> Spoiler
> 
> 
> 
> That was before coming to chat, not after.


who says i'm talking to YOU? 


Spoiler



look at the time of Cobbie's post.


----------



## Susan in VA

Don't you think Cobbie took a nap before posting that?


----------



## geoffthomas

Why do I suddenly feel sleepy?


----------



## D/W

Did you not sleep well last night, or could it be an after-lunch blood sugar slump?


----------



## *Sandy Harper*

Is "counting sheep helps sleep" outdated?


----------



## tsilver

Can someone be so good that he/she gets on your nerves?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

Am I ready for my little man to start kindergarten tomorrow?


----------



## geoffthomas

Are you prepared to stand back and let him grow up?


----------



## Alle Meine Entchen

Cobbie said:


> Spoiler
> 
> 
> 
> Never too tired for a little gigging?





Spoiler



gigging?


----------



## *Sandy Harper*

Why life is not always fair?


----------



## tsilver

Why have my sales slowed?


----------



## Annalog

DreamWeaver said:


> Was it really _20 years_ ago that I was asking myself this question regarding my daughter? (The answer was "_Yes_, I'm ready-and so is she!")


Was it 20 years ago today?


----------



## Brianna Lee McKenzie

Do vegetarians eat animal crackers?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

What happens if you get scared half to death ... twice?


----------



## tsilver

What happens when you get booed?


----------



## Susan in VA

Cobbie said:


> Spoiler
> 
> 
> 
> Scarlet's just too much fun to pass up.


Doesn't it seem like just yesterday that we were counting the posts until you were "allowed" to pick on her?


----------



## telracs

Annalog said:


> Was it 20 years ago today?


That Sgt Pepper taught the band to play?


----------



## Vegas_Asian

What is the weirdest pair of socks you own?

I have rainbow stripe thigh highs somewhere. 

Sent from my Desire HD using Tapatalk


----------



## Susan in VA

Are those weirder than my rainbow stripe toe socks (the kind with separate toes)?



Spoiler



They're left over from the mid-1970s.


----------



## tsilver

Do you like weird people?


----------



## Tip10

Alle Meine Entchen said:


> gigging?





Cobbie said:


> My slang for teasing, poking, etc.?
> 
> 
> 
> Spoiler
> 
> 
> 
> Scarlet's just too much fun to pass up.


Are you saying Scarlet's a frog?


Spoiler



She is green after all.


----------



## crebel

It's not easy being green, is it?


----------



## geoffthomas

did you know we have a new book klub - reading Regression with Kathy Bell?


----------



## *DrDLN* (dr.s.dhillon)

Why can't everybody be nice and peaceful?


----------



## tsilver

Why are some people violent?


----------



## tsilver

Are the kids back to school?


----------



## tsilver

Is it dangerous to hiccup while yodeling?


----------



## telracs

what would happen if you gave a yo-yo to a flock of flamingos?


----------



## D/W

How much wood can a woodchuck chuck?


----------



## telracs

sleep or ice cream?


----------



## D/W

ice cream—and then sleep?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

DreamWeaver said:


> How much wood can a woodchuck chuck?


If a woodchuck could chuck wood?


----------



## tsilver

Should you eat only fried foods on Friday?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

Don't you just love summer sun?


----------



## geoffthomas

Are some of us a leetle too focused on woodchucks?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

tsilver said:


> Should you eat only fried foods on Friday?


Should you eat only sundaes on Sunday?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

Have you heard John Barrowman sing "The Doctor and I"?

http://www.geekgirldiva.com/2011/08/john-barrowman-singing-doctor-who.html?utm_source=feedburner&utm_medium=email&utm_campaign=Feed%3A+GeekGirlDiva+%28Geek+Girl+Diva%29


----------



## D/W

Paper, plastic, or cloth bag?


----------



## tsilver

Do you know the way to San Jose?


----------



## tom st. laurent

How come I'm not a millionaire?


----------



## tsilver

If the lottery is honest, why haven't I won?


----------



## telracs

Cobbie said:


> Oh, my goodness, isn't he wonderful?
> 
> 
> 
> Spoiler
> 
> 
> 
> Of course, it doesn't hurt that he's so easy on the eyes.  I'm envious of Scarlet and possibly others here who have heard him in person. The closest I get to Broadway is the Tonys on TV.


You talking to me?

Would you fly 6 hours across an ocean to see him?


----------



## tsilver

mom133d (aka Liz) said:


> Should you eat only sundaes on Sunday?


Yes, I think it's a law


----------



## NapCat (retired)

When will I ever learn


----------



## spotsmom

Why do important things stop working when you are about to take them on a cross country trip?


----------



## tsilver

Am I lazier than you?


----------



## vwkitten

Did you say lazier or crazier?


----------



## D/W

Don't you wish you could fly like a bird?


----------



## tsilver

Oh where, oh where has my little dog gone?


----------



## vwkitten

Does your chewing gum lose its flavor on the bedpost over night?


----------



## tsilver

The rent is due again?


----------



## rayhensley

Is RENT good?


----------



## MindAttic

Should I push this big red button?


----------



## caracara

If you push the button, how am I suppose to push it?


----------



## 40977

Why aren't there more ducks in this thread?


----------



## MindAttic

Why isn't there more Duck Soup in this thread?


----------



## tsilver

Was duck soup on your order?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

Why am I so tired today?


----------



## caracara

Why are you up so early?


----------



## tsilver

Am I in the golden years?


----------



## kindleworm

Why does it rain right after you wash your car?


----------



## caracara

What is rain?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

Wasn't that fun?


----------



## caracara

Why are the donuts in the drawer?


----------



## tsilver

how did that hole get in my sock?


----------



## Tip10

Was yesterday a moving experience for the folks out east?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

Tip10 said:


> Was yesterday a moving experience for the folks out east?


Are you asking if we felt the earth move under our feet?


----------



## Bryan R. Dennis

Whose socks are these?


----------



## tsilver

Do you like to hum?


----------



## MindAttic

Do you not know the words?


----------



## D/W

What makes a helicopter lift off the ground?


----------



## tsilver

What would happen if helicopters had longer blades?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Why must Californians drive like THAT !


----------



## tom st. laurent

Helicopter blades are actually wings, rotating through the air in a circle rather than speeding down a runway to get airflow.
Question: Who cares?
But, it's interesting. And very clever.


----------



## tom st. laurent

tsilver said:


> What would happen if helicopters had longer blades?


They would get more lift. Enough to pick up a Sherman tank.


----------



## Tip10

tom st. laurent said:


> Helicopter blades are actually wings, rotating through the air in a circle rather than speeding down a runway to get airflow.
> Question: Who cares?
> But, it's interesting. And very clever.


Did you know the WHOP WHOP sound is actually those "wings" breaking the sound barrier?


----------



## caracara

Did you know that I've now learned something this morning from random questions?


----------



## D/W

tom st. laurent said:


> Question: Who cares?


I was watching two military helicopters take off yesterday. I have flown airplanes, so I understand the mechanics of that type of flight. But while observing the helicopters, I realized that I had _no_ idea how helicopters work, and I was curious. Thanks for the explanation!

Today's random questions: "Why does NapCat look so frightened/angry in that photo? People don't drive crazy in Nevada?"


----------



## Tip10

DreamWeaver said:


> I was watching two military helicopters take off yesterday. I have flown airplanes, so I understand the mechanics of that type of flight. But while observing the helicopters, I realized that I had _no_ idea how helicopters work, and I was curious. Thanks for the explanation!


In a nutshell:
Lift is from the angle of attack on the blades -- directional movement is the tilt on the spinning "disk" of the blades



DreamWeaver said:


> Today's random questions: "Why does NapCat look so frightened/angry in that photo? People don't drive crazy in Nevada?"


Think its the seatbelt laws that's frightening him?


----------



## tsilver

Why do people say "How do you do?"  How do I do what?


----------



## Grace Elliot

When you ask, 'How are you?' - why do some people give you an honest answer?


----------



## crebel

Shouldn't they answer the question you ask?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

If I ask, will I receive?


----------



## tsilver

Should I poke the questionner in the eye?


----------



## Vegas_Asian

Do you believe in magic? 


Sent from my Desire HD using Tapatalk


----------



## MindAttic

Do you believe in Magic Shell?


----------



## D/W

Did you ever see the tooth fairy?


----------



## telracs

random whatever night tonight is chat?


----------



## tsilver

Where are the marines?


----------



## kindleworm

Which way did he go?


----------



## Syria Says... AKA Celia Can Read

Is it moving day yet?!


----------



## Brianna Lee McKenzie

Where did I put my floaties? (Irene's coming!)


----------



## D/W

Are you all prepared?


----------



## tsilver

Have you thought of something fun to do while hiding from Irene in the basement?


----------



## crebel

If you are hiding from Irene, shouldn't you pick someplace besides the basement?


----------



## spotsmom

Is overreaction at play here?


----------



## tsilver

Is someone planning mischief?


----------



## MindAttic

Where can I buy a crate of mischief?


----------



## Syria Says... AKA Celia Can Read

Is it a dream within a dream?


----------



## tsilver

Is it lower class to brag about your peasant roots?


----------



## Bryan R. Dennis

Everyone loves dogs, so why do so many dog-lovers act like they're in a special club?


----------



## spotsmom

why is it impossible to get into chat on someone else's computer?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Why didn't SM bring her laptop on her trip??


----------



## spotsmom

Why does Spotsmom, who doesn't have a laptop, get a new funky phone before going on a trip that types interesting things


----------



## geoffthomas

Did we all survive the Earthquake/Hurricane/Tornados?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Will this be it ??


----------



## Brianna Lee McKenzie

What is "it"?


----------



## gina1230

Isn't it perfect?


----------



## tsilver

Is my wig on straight?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

Is my coffee ready yet?


----------



## tsilver

Where am I?


----------



## D/W

Who am I?


----------



## Tip10

Why isn't a lemon called a yellow, or a lime a green?


----------



## *DrDLN* (dr.s.dhillon)

Is it about time for my breakfast?


----------



## kindleworm

Are we there yet ?


----------



## tsilver

Am I still cute?


----------



## Alle Meine Entchen

will you still love me tomorrow?


----------



## Tony Richards

Why do people always ask such dumb questions?


----------



## Syria Says... AKA Celia Can Read

What would you do if I sang out of tune?


----------



## tsilver

If you sound like Kim Kardashian, would I go berserk?


----------



## Syria Says... AKA Celia Can Read

Would walk out of the room?


----------



## Susan in VA

How long is it going to take me to catch up on threads after a week's vacation?


----------



## Susan in VA

Cobbie said:


> Spoiler
> 
> 
> 
> I knowww! How time flies.
> 
> 
> 
> And isn't it still so much fun?


Do you think she'd agree?


----------



## Susan in VA

NapCat said:


> When will I ever learn


uh-oh.... what did you do?


----------



## Susan in VA

NapCat said:


> Why must Californians drive like THAT !


If they really do, then how did Californians get a reputation for being laid back?


----------



## kindleworm

Would you like some dessert ?


----------



## Syria Says... AKA Celia Can Read

Does it have chocolate?


----------



## geoffthomas

Everything MUST have chocolate, right?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

What did I do to deserve this?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Do I deserve this?


----------



## crebel

Don't I deserve this?


----------



## gina1230

Don't I deserve Fridays off?


----------



## telracs

where are you?


----------



## tsilver

What's happening?


----------



## caracara

What should be happening on a random thread?


----------



## kindleworm

What's for dinner tonight ?


----------



## Austin_Briggs

Who doesn't deserve this?


----------



## Kimberly Llewellyn

How do I dilute water?


----------



## spotsmom

Is it possible to find your gate in Chicago?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Kimberly Llewellyn said:


> How do I dilute water?


With Scotch?


----------



## tsilver

If not, why not?


----------



## SimonSmithWilson

How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood?


----------



## caracara

Why is there no Dr Pepper?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Where is the Lonely Heart's Club Band?


----------



## gina1230

Where's my coffee?


----------



## D/W

Where's my pudding?


----------



## Vegas_Asian

Did u check where u last saw it?


----------



## Tip10

Exactly WHO is Waldo and why should I care where he is?


----------



## tsilver

Where's George W?


----------



## D/W

Who were my ancestors?


----------



## spotsmom

Could a woodchuck chuck more wood with a McCullough chain saw?


----------



## tsilver

Is a mirror lonely when no one is in front of it?


----------



## loonlover

Did you have to give me another inanimate object to worry about offending?


----------



## kindleworm

When is breakfast being served ?


----------



## tsilver

Are you overly sensitive?


----------



## spotsmom

Did I make a big mistake buying an Android phone rather than an iPhone?


----------



## tsilver

Is "Zippy dee do dah" a secret code of some kind?


----------



## telracs

wanna chat?


----------



## rayhensley

wanna rap?


----------



## tsilver

wanna dance?


----------



## Syria Says... AKA Celia Can Read

Am I on fire?


----------



## Stephen_Melling

So who killed Cock Robin, then?


----------



## Annalog

Does anyone need proof that I am a geek?


----------



## Syria Says... AKA Celia Can Read

Can you describe the ruckus?


----------



## tom st. laurent

Is it over yet?


----------



## Vegas_Asian

what is with all the error pages?

just wanna do my online homework


----------



## tsilver

Do I hear a whistle?


----------



## caracara

Do I love KB?


----------



## rayhensley

Maybe dried garlic shakers aren't as good as fresh garlic?


----------



## caracara

You think I should actually pay attention in class?


----------



## geoffthomas

Why would you pay for the class and then ignore what you paid for?


----------



## Nick Wastnage

How many ants in an anthill?


----------



## tsilver

Are mice great lovers?


----------



## *Sandy Harper*

Am I in love?


----------



## Alle Meine Entchen

how can a dog gain so much weight over the weekend?



Spoiler



answer: by figuring out she can go to the soft touch next door to get more breakfast, lunch and dinner


----------



## tsilver

Does your dog understand you?


----------



## Alle Meine Entchen

tsilver said:


> Does your dog understand you?


aren't you assuming my dog is intelligent?


Spoiler



She isn't. She's the 2nd dumbest dog I've seen


----------



## kindleworm

Have you started your Christmas shopping ?


----------



## Alle Meine Entchen

kindleworm said:


> Have you started your Christmas shopping ?


Haven't you?


Spoiler



I'm almost finished


----------



## tsilver

Don't you believe in Santa Claus?


----------



## MindAttic

Is Santa Claus some sort of immortal creature?


----------



## tsilver

Does anyone know?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Was that a mouse ?


----------



## spotsmom

Can mice get through cat doors?


----------



## kindleworm

Do cats really have nine lives ?


----------



## spotsmom

Why are some dogs terrified of thunderstorms and others don't care?


----------



## tsilver

Did you do a study on this?


----------



## MindAttic

Do you know how many sociologists it takes to screw in a light bulb?


----------



## Vegas_Asian

What is with people and their power trips

Sent from my HTC Inspire via Tapatalk


----------



## tom st. laurent

The devil makes them do it.

Is there there?


----------



## spotsmom

Why do 8 hour workdays seem like 16 hours?


----------



## Brenda Carroll

Is there any truth in lending?


----------



## spotsmom

Why when you're looking for someone can they not be found?


----------



## tsilver

When you find something, do you wonder why you were looking for it?


----------



## Syria Says... AKA Celia Can Read

Who wants to bring me a green tea lemonade from Starbucks?


----------



## Nick Wastnage

Is there a Starbucks on the North Pole?


----------



## Michael Cargill

If a pig walks by Castle Dracula on a Tuesday playing a banjo what will happen?


----------



## Syria Says... AKA Celia Can Read

Is the banjo tuned?


----------



## spotsmom

Why is this can of peaches packed in pear juice?


----------



## telracs

okay, exactly how big a suitcase do i need?


----------



## spotsmom

Is Scarlet doing personal Internet business on company time?


----------



## telracs

don't you know that scarlet is off on Wednesdays?


----------



## spotsmom

Haven't you heard that you should pack your suitcase and then take at least a quarter of the stuff out?


----------



## tsilver

Isn't that rather insane?


----------



## Bryan R. Dennis

In cartoons with anthropomorphic characters, why are dogs the only ones naked, four-legged, and unable to speak?


----------



## telracs

Bryan R. Dennis said:


> In cartoons with anthropomorphic characters, why are dogs the only ones naked, four-legged, and unable to speak?


because the cartoonists are cats?


----------



## tsilver

Are dogs being discriminated against?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

What about cats?


----------



## tsilver

If Wednesday's child is full of woe, what is Thursday's child?


----------



## crebel

Doesn't Thursday's child have "far to go"?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Is this an early Autumn?


----------



## tsilver

Is early autumn Walter weather?


----------



## spotsmom

Is there really a hard freeze warning here tonight??


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

What should my next cross-stitch project be?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Where is JD??


----------



## spotsmom

Is JD out in a dry lot wishing he was out in the pasture with the other 2 horses?


----------



## D/W

Where is the sun today?


----------



## tsilver

what happened to my energy?


----------



## spotsmom

Where did summer go?


----------



## telracs

did you wish harvey a happy birthday?


----------



## Brianna Lee McKenzie

Is it Harvey's birthday? _whispers Happy Birthday Harvey!_


----------



## Susan in VA

kindleworm said:


> Have you started your Christmas shopping ?





Alle Meine Entchen said:


> Haven't you?
> 
> 
> Spoiler
> 
> 
> 
> I'm almost finished


 
Does anyone else find this depressing? I haven't even put away summer vacation stuff.



Spoiler



Alle, will you start on my list next?


----------



## Alle Meine Entchen

Susan in VA said:


> Does anyone else find this depressing? I haven't even put away summer vacation stuff.
> 
> 
> 
> Spoiler
> 
> 
> 
> Alle, will you start on my list next?


Do you think I have time to shop for someone else?



Spoiler



I just ordered the last gift I can buy until the baby comes. Grandparent's gifts are going to be family pics of the 4 of us


----------



## tsilver

It's 11:30 a.m.  Shall I have breakfast, lunch or ice cream?


----------



## Nick Wastnage

What do some people talk more than others?


----------



## D/W

Nick Wastnage said:


> What do some people talk more than others?


Themselves?


----------



## Syria Says... AKA Celia Can Read

Can someone deliver some waffles to me?


----------



## tsilver

Where is Daddy Warbucks?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

Where's my remote control?


----------



## tsilver

What happened to my feet?


----------



## D/W

tsilver said:


> What happened to my feet?


Did they walk off?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Of all times.....why now ?


----------



## spotsmom

Did you ever havd to make up your mind?


----------



## telracs

how many shirts should i pack?


----------



## spotsmom

Do you really need shirts?


----------



## tsilver

It's Wednesday.  What happened to Tuesday?


----------



## D/W

Why is it that the older we get, the faster time seems to pass?


----------



## spotsmom

Why does time pass faster on a day off?


----------



## telracs

long sleeve or short sleeve?


----------



## tsilver

do men wear blouses?


----------



## spotsmom

Where did that llama come from anyway?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Did you llama come from Peru?


----------



## telracs

machu pichu?


----------



## tsilver

Was it a stray?


----------



## crebel

How many nickels are in your change jar?


----------



## D/W

Does a found penny really bring good luck?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

Was it face up?


----------



## spotsmom

Did you ever have to finally decide- to say yes to one and let the other one ride?


----------



## Brianna Lee McKenzie

Are we talking about gambling?


----------



## spotsmom

Were the Lovin' Spoonful into gambling?


----------



## tsilver

Who is worse -- a gambler or a cheater?


----------



## spotsmom

Does it depend on what you're cheating on?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

Do you want to know a secret?


----------



## tsilver

Was it you?


----------



## Syria Says... AKA Celia Can Read

Is it October yet?


----------



## D/W

Valmore Daniels said:


> Do you want to know a secret?


Do you promise not to tell?


----------



## spotsmom

Do forest rangers all have badges?


----------



## tsilver

Do badgers eat forest rangers?


----------



## spotsmom

Did Don King look like he had a badger in his shorts?


----------



## tsilver

Why were you looking there?


----------



## telracs

anybody want this cold?


----------



## spotsmom

Are you getting sick of youf trip already?


----------



## D/W

"Badges? We don't need no stinkin' badges!" (from _Blazing Saddles_)


----------



## NapCat (retired)

What in heaven's name is a "Porca"?


----------



## spotsmom

How could you possibly not know what a Porca is?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Why aren't we packed yet?


----------



## spotsmom

Are we going on a guilt trip?


----------



## telracs

are you gonna miss me?


----------



## spotsmom

Oh, are you going somewhere?


----------



## tsilver

My cousin's name is Porca.


----------



## Kayden Lee

I am all for recycling, but what is up with GREEN toiletpaper?


----------



## spotsmom

What happens if I follow the yellow brick road?


----------



## telracs

spotsmom said:


> What happens if I follow the yellow brick road?


you end up under the rainbow?


----------



## tsilver

Isn't that where the pot of gold is?


----------



## spotsmom

Wl there be leprechauns?


----------



## crebel

Wouldn't that be magically delicious?


----------



## tsilver

I know Val Daniels' secret.  Do you want me to tell you?


----------



## D/W

Did Val ask you not to tell?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Who's on first?


----------



## spotsmom

Is Hughes Net reliable?


----------



## geoffthomas

Why?    (Just Why?)


----------



## kindleworm

How long has this been going on ?


----------



## crebel

Why am I always the last to know?


----------



## spotsmom

Why do people refuse to tell me anything?


----------



## D/W

Who gave me this head cold?


----------



## spotsmom

Do dark clouds always mean rain?


----------



## MindAttic

Would a rose really smell as sweet if you called it a skunk?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Who? Me ?


----------



## tsilver

or is it the drunk guy lying in the street?


----------



## telracs

does my kindle get insulted when people think it is an iPad?


----------



## tsilver

Does my little toe feel neglected?


----------



## kindleworm

When will lunch be served ?


----------



## Iain Manson

Three questions taken from public examinations in Egyptian schools in the 1970s:

1. How do sovels affect the soft ricks when the wind blows a gainst them?
2. Why is invar used for making penclulms?
3. What is the freezing paint?

[It's all sic.]


----------



## spotsmom

Should we wear flannel shirts in honor of Walter Weather?


----------



## balaspa

Oh, why did you say THAT?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Where's the fire ?


----------



## spotsmom

Does the Kindle tablet have the fire?


----------



## tsilver

Who did it?


----------



## telracs

when did i hit ten thousand posts?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Who was Margaret Tobin?


----------



## crebel

Haven't you read the "Go West, young Scarlet" thread?


----------



## Alexis-Shore

Coffee anyone?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

Do we have to go to work today?


----------



## Alexis-Shore

Why are my toes itchy?


----------



## telracs

have i joined an australian tour group?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

Alexis-Shore said:


> Why are my toes itchy?


Are you going on a trip?


----------



## Alexis-Shore

Is a hymen a song you sing in church?


----------



## D/W

Now what?


----------



## kindleworm

Why do rose bushes have thorns ?


----------



## telracs

why no welcome to wyoming sign?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Is Wyoming a friendly State?


----------



## Alle Meine Entchen

why did I listen to DH?


----------



## Alexis-Shore

Mulva?


----------



## *DrDLN* (dr.s.dhillon)

What is Mulva?


----------



## spotsmom

Wasn't Mulva on Seinfeld?


----------



## tsilver

Would you name your pet Mulva?


----------



## kindleworm

What time is it ?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Where is my watch?


----------



## spotsmom

Do people still wear watches?


----------



## Fleurignacois

Can you tell me why my wife wont wear a watch?


----------



## Alexis-Shore

Whose bra is this?


----------



## Alle Meine Entchen

do I really want another child?


Spoiler



I realize that since #2 is coming the end of Nov, that this is the wrong time to ask that question


----------



## Brianna Lee McKenzie

Alle Meine Entchen said:


> do I really want another child?
> 
> 
> Spoiler
> 
> 
> 
> I realize that since #2 is coming the end of Nov, that this is the wrong time to ask that question


So you can hover over the blacked-out section and read what the person wrote?


----------



## tsilver

Remind me.  What's the best part of growing old?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Is it really "CHAT" when Scarlet is away?


----------



## telracs

why isn't it?


----------



## Fleurignacois

Have you got a minute?


----------



## Alexis-Shore

Can someone buy me a newspaper?


----------



## tsilver

If you look freaky when you wake up, are you an alien?


----------



## Fleurignacois

If you feel alien when you wake up, are you freaky?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

If you see an alien, will you freak out?


----------



## Fleurignacois

If you are out when you freak, will you know?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Is there a cruise in my future ??


----------



## tsilver

Did you look into your crystal ball?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Was Custer standing at the Little Bighorn battle?


----------



## Alexis-Shore

Why do men have nipples?


----------



## tsilver

Why do people insist that you smile?


----------



## Fleurignacois

Wht do people say "be careful" when you are up a ladder?


----------



## tsilver

why does spinach look bad on teeth?


----------



## Fleurignacois

Does dirt really taste like beetroot?


----------



## Alexis-Shore

What's the point?


----------



## kindleworm

What makes you laugh ?


----------



## Fleurignacois

Are politicians really people?


----------



## geoffthomas

When will there be enough?


----------



## tsilver

Is regular ivy ashamed of being related to poison ivy?


----------



## telracs

where are all the trains going?


----------



## geoffthomas

Where does the train track go to, really?


----------



## Fleurignacois

Do all roads really lead to Rome?


----------



## spotsmom

Are you thinking of something in particular?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Is Old Faithful?


----------



## Fleurignacois

can you help me?


----------



## caracara

Am I beyond professional help?


Spoiler



Why yes, I believe I am.


----------



## tsilver

Are you perhaps too humble?


----------



## spotsmom

Has South Park really been on for 15 years?


----------



## gina1230

How can I improve my memory?


----------



## Alexis-Shore

Why? Just why?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

Why not?


----------



## tsilver

Are you a star?


----------



## kindleworm

Do stars really twinkle ?


----------



## Fleurignacois

How deep is my valley?


----------



## Tara Maya

How many roads must a man walk down?


----------



## Alexis-Shore

Is this it?


----------



## Fleurignacois

Are soap operas always clean?


----------



## telracs

is it okay to get sushi in wyoming?


----------



## spotsmom

Is eating sushi in Wyoming the same as referring to someone as all hat and no cattle?


----------



## telracs

if it has cooked beef in it, is it still sushi?


----------



## Fleurignacois

Can you be slightly pregnant?


----------



## tsilver

Is ridiculouser a word?


----------



## Fleurignacois

is it ridiculous to make up words?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

Are you glad its Friday?


----------



## Fleurignacois

What were weekends called when people worked on Saturday?


----------



## tsilver

What happens to my image when I'm not in front of a mirror?


----------



## Brianna Lee McKenzie

Brownies anyone?


----------



## D/W

Is that something stuck between your teeth?


----------



## telracs

Brianna Lee McKenzie said:


> Brownies anyone?


are there nuts in them?


----------



## tsilver

Does your family tree bear strange fruit?


----------



## gina1230

Why is my dog growling?


----------



## tsilver

does your dog bite?


----------



## Vegas_Asian

What to eat? 

My dog does bite...just the does of my skirts

Sent from my HTC Inspire via Tapatalk


----------



## Fleurignacois

Why is the score 0-16?


----------



## tsilver

Who invented chocolate?


----------



## Alexis-Shore

What happened to my nice socks?


----------



## loonlover

Did the cat attack them?


----------



## Kamekeisen

What is six by nine?


----------



## telracs

have i been here before?


----------



## tsilver

Are you lost?


----------



## telracs

how many 'bumps' am i allowed in one day?


----------



## Fleurignacois

Will tomorrow be different?


----------



## MindAttic

Is tomorrow really another day?


----------



## Alexis-Shore

Stop patting my ass.


----------



## Annalog

scarlet said:


> how many 'bumps' am i allowed in one day?


Is it as many "bumps" as there are in the Grand Canyon?


----------



## Fleurignacois

Was Columbus a useless navigator?


----------



## geoffthomas

Is there enough?


----------



## D/W

Is there too much?


----------



## telracs

where did i leave the sunscreen?


----------



## crebel

Is it in the pocket of your raincoat?


----------



## tsilver

Is that your dog dragging a raincoat?


----------



## telracs

what raincoat?


----------



## spotsmom

Scarlet has a dog?


----------



## telracs

huh?


----------



## Fleurignacois

What did you say?


----------



## Alexis-Shore

Who cut my grass?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

Did you not want your grass cut?


----------



## Alexis-Shore

Have I written enough smut today?


----------



## geoffthomas

Can there be such a thing?


----------



## Fleurignacois

Is there life on Mars?


----------



## telracs

do you watch pawn stars?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Why would anyone watch Pawn Stars?


----------



## tsilver

Is smut rated?


----------



## Fleurignacois

Why not watch Pawn stars?


----------



## Alexis-Shore

What is this stuff in my eye?


----------



## tsilver

Am I the only person with three eyes?


----------



## Vegas_Asian

Can I keep her?
Sent from my HTC Inspire via Tapatalk


----------



## rayhensley

Hungry?


----------



## tsilver

got fleas?


----------



## Alexis-Shore

Did you stub you toe?


----------



## Vegas_Asian

What color nail polish this week?

Sent from my HTC Inspire via Tapatalk


----------



## Alexis-Shore

Will I get a good night's sleep tonight?


----------



## Wingpeople

Why am I posting this question when there are so many other things I should be doing?


----------



## kindleworm

When will dinner be ready ?


----------



## tsilver

Did anyone hear what I just did?


----------



## telracs

sunday night chat?


----------



## Angela

Is it OK to skip 80 some odd pages of posts and jump right in like I never left?


----------



## Fleurignacois

Will Hollande be France's next president?


----------



## tsilver

Will I ever be acknowledged as your queen?


----------



## Alexis-Shore

Anything you want to get off your chest?


----------



## Fleurignacois

Why didn't you ask me first?


----------



## geoffthomas

Would you have answered?


----------



## Angela

Where have all the heroes gone?

Sent from my DROID2 GLOBAL using Tapatalk


----------



## spotsmom

Why can I read all the directions but still not be able to figure it out?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Why can't I get into the Chat Room ??


----------



## spotsmom

You don't know how  Where is Independence, CA?


----------



## tsilver

What's so terrible about being a nerd?


----------



## spotsmom

Is it true that nerds get paid a lot of money?


----------



## gina1230

Why?


----------



## Meb Bryant

Because under all that nerdiness, is a gorgeous brain capable of making lots of money.


----------



## Fleurignacois

Is that really a question?


----------



## Angela

Why am I still in my pj's?


----------



## Fleurignacois

How can I choose a new phone when I dont understand what they do?


----------



## geoffthomas

Did I do that?


----------



## Fleurignacois

Can you forgive me?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Cream and Sugar?


----------



## gina1230

Coffee or tea?


----------



## Fleurignacois

Was I really that slim once?


----------



## Alexis-Shore

Why did I agree to an airport run?


----------



## Angela

How is it I always end up with the phone that never works?


----------



## tsilver

What does "thurs" mean in the word Thursday?


----------



## kindleworm

Are we ready for some winter weather ?


----------



## Alexis-Shore

What can I smell?


----------



## Angela

What shall I have for dinner?


----------



## tsilver

What is that strange looking thing on my dinner plate?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

And why is it crawling away from me?


----------



## kindleworm

Have you ever climbed a tree ?


----------



## Fleurignacois

What shall I wear today?


----------



## Alexis-Shore

What's in your cup?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Why is it Christmas in WalMart, already?


----------



## Alexis-Shore

Who will buy my monkeys?


----------



## Victoria J

Do TV network executives have something personal against me?


----------



## tsilver

What happened to my meatball?


----------



## Angela

Just how loud can one person snore?


----------



## spotsmom

If you clean out your woodstove, is that like having your ashes hauled?


----------



## Fleurignacois

Will it be warmer today?


----------



## tsilver

What are you insinuating?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Why lie?


----------



## Alexis-Shore

Seriously, who will buy my monkeys?


----------



## spotsmom

Why ruin a beautiful friendship?


----------



## Angela

Why do I put up with this?


----------



## telracs

Alexis-Shore said:


> Seriously, who will buy my monkeys?


how much you want for them?


----------



## tsilver

Where were you yesterday?


----------



## telracs

random sunday chat?


----------



## Meb Bryant

Is my bunny a girl or a boy?


----------



## Victoria J

Where's my pumpkin bread?


----------



## Angela

Did I forget to empty the dryer again?


----------



## Alexis-Shore

What should I have for lunch?


----------



## kindleworm

Why do mornings have to start so early ?


----------



## tsilver

Is there mud on my shoes?


----------



## geoffthomas

Are we still confused?


----------



## Marguerite

What should I make for dinner?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

How about some hearty beef stew?


----------



## tsilver

Would you rather have a lizard sandwich?


----------



## spotsmom

Is it really better with bananas?


----------



## Angela

Am I getting sick?


----------



## loonlover

Why didn't I do some laundry yesterday?


----------



## lpking

Will my knee stop feeling weird so I can work out tomorrow?


----------



## tsilver

Why don't I go to bed?


----------



## Angela

Why don't _*I*_ go to bed?


----------



## geoffthomas

Did you go to bed yet?


----------



## kindleworm

Is it going to snow soon ?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

kindleworm said:


> Is it going to snow soon ?


Can you believe our weatherman said we have a winter advisory from midnight to 2 pm tomorrow?


----------



## Angela

If a fly doesn't have wings, do you call it a walk?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

Will my trees survive this wintery weather?


----------



## kindleworm

How much is that doggy in the window ?


----------



## Aris Whittier

What shall I fix for dinner tonight?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Do I have enough shallots??


----------



## spotsmom

Do I have to go to work tomorrow?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Why isn't the "Quotes of the Day' Thread more popular among all we avid readers??


----------



## Brianna Lee McKenzie

Where did summer go?


----------



## tsilver

Why does she come around the moutain?


----------



## geoffthomas

Is she trying to find where summer went?


----------



## spotsmom

When it's really cold outside does the wind have to blow too?


----------



## telracs

why don't i like any of my grand canyon pictures?


----------



## kindleworm

Should I have another cup of coffee ?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Have you heard the rumors??


----------



## crebel

The rumors about dating in the KB chat room?


----------



## kindleworm

Is it time to feed the dog ?


----------



## tsilver

Is your dog better looking than you?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Where is the dog?


----------



## spotsmom

Is the dog out by the fence?


----------



## tsilver

Is it the other dog?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Where is my date ?


----------



## telracs

miss me?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

What's not to miss?


----------



## geoffthomas

So who is dating in the chat room??

(inquiring minds want to know).


----------



## NapCat (retired)

What time is it, really?


----------



## spotsmom

Is someone starting rumors?


----------



## telracs

spotsmom said:


> Is someone starting rumors?


who would do that?


----------



## crebel

I wouldn't start rumors, would you?


----------



## telracs

wanna chat?


----------



## Brenda Carroll

Why do itty bitty noises that are not supposed to be there scare me?


----------



## genodidit!

Is the reason the pigeons here at the beach hang out and defacate (is that spelled correctly?) (shit) on my house because I have the most comfortable shingles?


----------



## hamerfan

NapCat said:


> What time is it, really?


Does anybody really know what time it is?


----------



## Annalog

Is November when hens normally become broody? Is it something about the arrival of freezing temperatures that triggers the nesting instinct? Is it because they cannot fly south for the winter? Or do I just have unusual hens?


----------



## geoffthomas

Will I really be free from mowing the lawn until Spring?


----------



## spotsmom

Isn't Rumors an album by Fleetwood Mac?


----------



## crebel

Isn't that just another rumor?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

Or is it fact?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Or is it Memorex ?


----------



## spotsmom

Have you lost your date again?


----------



## telracs

are you chatting AGAIN?


----------



## Randirogue

What are you doing for 4th of July?



scarlet said:


> are you chatting AGAIN?


For some reason, coming from you, that question doesn't seem very random... I wonder why?


----------



## spotsmom

Why is the cat on the keyboard?uy76


----------



## telracs

July 76?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Chatroomers = Chatrumors ?


----------



## spotsmom

Is it even possible to start rumors about a cat?


----------



## geoffthomas

Will we be able to know the truth?


----------



## tsilver

Are you spreading lies about cats?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Just what is going on in the Chatroom?


----------



## kindleworm

When will it start snowing?


----------



## spotsmom

Is the chat room going to the dogs?


----------



## telracs

are you calling me a dog?


----------



## Brenda Carroll

When did dogs and cats start having affairs?


----------



## telracs

Brendan Carroll said:


> When did dogs and cats start having affairs?


when did they stop?


----------



## momilp

Was it a Tuesday?


----------



## Brenda Carroll

Was it ever announced?


----------



## spotsmom

Was protection used?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

Will you remember?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Remember What?


----------



## spotsmom

A turkey stuffed with tuna?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

A Tuna stuffed with turkey?


----------



## spotsmom

Is something fishy going on?


----------



## Randirogue

Is that my Ferrari you're driving?


----------



## telracs

Randirogue said:


> Is that my Ferrari you're driving?


is yours the blue one or the red one?


----------



## tsilver

Who ate all the green jelly beans?


----------



## telracs

tsilver said:


> Who ate all the green jelly beans?


the pear or the jalapeno?


----------



## gina1230

Why must I do everything?


----------



## Randirogue

scarlet said:


> is yours the blue one or the red one?


Don't you mean the dark azure or the SCARLET one?

;-)


----------



## geoffthomas

Does Scarlet own a Ferrari?


----------



## spotsmom

Does Scarlet even have a driver's license?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

Haven't we discussed this before?


----------



## Randirogue

Who doesn't have a favorite topic or theme that will draw them over and over again?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

Why is everything that tastes so good, fattening?


----------



## Randirogue

Why is fat always a bad thing?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

What on earth are they talking about ??


----------



## geoffthomas

And why are they talking about it?


----------



## Annalog

Randirogue said:


> Why is fat always a bad thing?


Was it a good thing if it provided extra padding when I fell while walking backwards the other day?


----------



## spotsmom

In the long run, does it really mean anything?


----------



## Brenda Carroll

Is anyone listening out there?


----------



## Randirogue

Annalog said:


> Was it a good thing if it provided extra padding when I fell while walking backwards the other day?


Is someone glad they have a built in cushion?


----------



## Annalog

Randirogue said:


> Why is fat always a bad thing?





Annalog said:


> Was it a good thing if it provided extra padding when I fell while walking backwards the other day?





Randirogue said:


> Is someone glad they have a built in cushion?


Is "Absolutely!" the answer to that question?


----------



## Randirogue

Annalog said:


> Is "Absolutely!" the answer to that question?


Do those one-size-too-small pants on the sale-rack get a say?


----------



## telracs

Randirogue said:


> Do those one-size-too-small pants on the sale-rack get a say?


are the pants talking to you again?


----------



## geoffthomas

Do you hear pants talking to you


----------



## crebel

What does it mean when the woolyworms don't have a band of black but are solid black?


----------



## spotsmom

Does it mean that the forecast for the winter is bleak?


----------



## crebel

How did you know that is what I was afraid of?


----------



## spotsmom

Did you know I was afraid of the same thing?


----------



## telracs

how much sushi is enough?


----------



## tsilver

Are you asking me?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Is shopping on Black Friday, really worth it ??


----------



## spotsmom

Why do some people actually enjoy shopping (other than cats)?


----------



## loonlover

scarlet said:


> how much sushi is enough?


None?


----------



## telracs

not a sushi fan?


----------



## loonlover

You could tell, huh?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Are fish really heavy drinkers?


----------



## Randirogue

scarlet said:


> are the pants talking to you again?


When are they *not* talking to me?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Has *[size=18pt]BLACK FRIDAY* become a National Holiday ??[/size]


----------



## spotsmom

Has Thanksgiving been trampled by shopping and Christmas?


----------



## telracs

spotsmom said:


> Has Thanksgiving been trampled by shopping and Christmas?


Like Hallowe'en?


----------



## Randirogue

Do current retail workers (not owners, investors, or corporate climbers - but basic every-day retail employees) LOATH Black Friday as much as I did when I worked it?


----------



## Randirogue

Have any of you fellow Kindleboarders suffered working with the achingly cheery store owner (or corporate climber) that insisted that the staff call It Green Friday instead of Black Friday to void ny possible negative connotations (since most of us spoke of it with intense dread), despite the relevance of the Black Friday monicker on multiple levels?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Say Wot ??


----------



## telracs

wanna chat?


----------



## Brianna Lee McKenzie

*stamping foot* Did I miss it again?


----------



## spotsmom

Why is the pan of brownies that I made this afternoon nearly gone (and there are only 2 of us in the house)?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

spotsmom said:


> Why is the pan of brownies that I made this afternoon nearly gone (and there are only 2 of us in the house)?


Mice?


----------



## kindleworm

When ist it going to snow ?


----------



## Randirogue

When is it going to snow _again_?


----------



## telracs

you want snow?


----------



## Randirogue

Does not the snow make everything sparkly?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

Would you prefer snow or sun?


----------



## Randirogue

Does my great yearning to stab the sun for stabbing my eyes answer your question?


----------



## Victoria J

You mean to tell me that I've missed the 4th season of Fringe?


----------



## kindleworm

Where are my gloves ?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Alle: What is your new son's name??


----------



## Annalog

NapCat, were those some of your cats I saw flying past my house this morning? If so, how is it that they fly better than my chickens?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Did the cats have a startled looking peacock with them??


----------



## Brianna Lee McKenzie

Is it windy or did cats learn to fly?


----------



## gina1230

Cobbie said:


> When I let you in front of me in traffic could you _please_ go the speed limit and not ten mph below?
> 
> 
> 
> Spoiler
> 
> 
> 
> No need for a "Thank you". I gave up on that long ago.


Can I second that?


----------



## kindleworm

Should I start baking some Christmas cookies ?


----------



## loonlover

Are you willing to share?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

Who doesn't like cookies?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Why can't I find Pfeffernüsse anywhere?


----------



## spotsmom

When is it going to snow?


----------



## Annalog

Why did it snow at my house when I was not there to see it?


----------



## spotsmom

How can it snow in Tucson?


----------



## tsilver

Are you Santa Claus?


----------



## Annalog

Isn't it interesting how differences in elevation affect the weather? Weren't the Catalina Mountain foothills beautiful covered in snow when the Tucson valley had fog instead? Wasn't it surprising that the dusting of snow in my backyard, just outside Benson, stayed for three days because it was in the shade on the north side of my house and a thousand feet higher than Tucson? Aren't I glad that it warmed up a bit so that the lows are closer to 25F instead of 15F? Don't I love the mostly sunny skies during most days? Am I happy that it is Saturday morning and I can stay home instead of driving an hour to go to Tucson? Am I silly to write this post on my K2?


----------



## Annalog

Was my answer to an earlier question, posted in the form of questions, the cause of dropping this thread to the bottom of page 3? Or am I just paranoid?


Spoiler



I know --- I am both compulsive and paranoid.


----------



## telracs

ponies?


----------



## spotsmom

dirty ponies?


----------



## Annalog

Wild horses?


----------



## spotsmom

How does one shop for shopping cats?


----------



## R J Askew

My hand for an encore.


----------



## telracs

Huh?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

Wassup?


----------



## gina1230

What's the matter?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

spotsmom said:


> How does one shop for shopping cats?


Do you think shopping cats can be bought?


----------



## Brianna Lee McKenzie

Is tomorrow Monday already?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Am I really out of horseradish ?


----------



## *DrDLN* (dr.s.dhillon)

Why B&N is not selling as many books as amazon?


----------



## Brianna Lee McKenzie

Is it really almost 2012?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Is it really 2012 ?


----------



## spotsmom

Why am I so tired when I stay up until midnight?


----------



## telracs

spotsmom said:


> Why am I so tired when I stay up until midnight?


is it soup yet?


----------



## spotsmom

Does this classify as nuts?


----------



## kindleworm

Is it ever going to snow around here ?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

Why am I so tired?


----------



## spotsmom

If oregon wins the Rose Bowl, will I have to suffer my obnoxious co-workers?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Why Iowa ?


----------



## *DrDLN* (dr.s.dhillon)

Valmore Daniels said:


> Why am I so tired?


Why don't you rest to find out?


----------



## crebel

spotsmom said:


> If oregon wins the Rose Bowl, will I have to suffer my obnoxious co-workers?


Since Oregon did win, how obnoxious were they today?


----------



## crebel

NapCat said:


> Why Iowa ?


Why not Iowa?


----------



## telracs

do i know you?


----------



## crebel

Who, me?


----------



## Tip10

You do know what IOWA stands for don't you?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

I'm sorry, were you talking to me?


----------



## telracs

why isn't my sister checking her e-mail?

and okay, i'll bite, what DOES Iowa mean?


----------



## sesmith

Is this the Transylvania station?


----------



## telracs

sesmith said:


> Is this the Transylvania station?


No, but is that the Transylvania Mania?


----------



## Tip10

scarlet said:


> what DOES Iowa mean?


Not mean -- stand for -- okay well it is mean though! 
*I*Somebody's *O*ut *W*andering* A*round --
Can you fill in the *I*somebody??


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

Irene?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

Is anyone going to try to watch that meteor shower?


----------



## Kimberly Llewellyn

Did you really just call me to say you can't talk?


----------



## crebel

Tip10 said:


> Not mean -- stand for -- okay well it is mean though!
> *I*Somebody's *O*ut *W*andering* A*round --
> Can you fill in the *I*somebody??


Aww, that's a little harsh, isn't it? lol


----------



## Tip10

What -- you don't consider yourself an *I*ntellectual?    


Spoiler



And surely, being from Iowa, you have heard that before. No??


----------



## sesmith

Christian and Single?


----------



## loonlover

Aren't cats always either taking a nap or a pre-nap nap?


----------



## telracs

loonlover said:


> Aren't cats always either taking a nap or a pre-nap nap?


or a post nap nap?


----------



## spotsmom

Do cats ever fully wake up?


----------



## telracs

you gonna chat tonight?


----------



## spotsmom

Shall I?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

How did I get strep throat again?


----------



## spotsmom

Why do cats like to walk on keyboards?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Haven't you heard of *KITTEN ON THE KEYS * ?


----------



## Alexis-Shore

What is that?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Why did I bother washing/waxing it, knowing I was going to do this ??


----------



## spotsmom

Is that really Gandalf?


----------



## telracs

spotsmom said:


> Is that really Gandalf?


Or is it Dumbledore?


----------



## SheenahFreitas

Where's Waldo?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Was Waldo here ??


----------



## *Sandy Harper*

Who is Waldo?


----------



## telracs

wednesday night chat?


----------



## Vegas_Asian

Is it my day off yet? 

Sent from my Kindle Fire using Tapatalk


----------



## Todd Young

Have I eaten too much?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

Why, are you too full?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Why does the scale in the doctor's office ALWAYS read higher than the one at home ??


----------



## Annalog

NapCat said:


> Why does the scale in the doctor's office ALWAYS read higher than the one at home ??


Is it always 5 pounds higher? Would I be happy if the scale in my doctor's office read what is shown in the image above?


----------



## Annalog

tkkenyon said:


> Is your doctor's scale merely 5 pounds higher?


Is that why they always apologize that their scale is off? It should be higher?


----------



## Kashif Ross

After I gain five pounds, why am I an inch shorter? Is there still hope after 26?


----------



## Vegas_Asian

What should I paint on my lab coat for Microbiology lab

Sent from my HTC Inspire via Tapatalk


----------



## Vegas_Asian

What should I paint on my lab coat for Microbiology lab

Sent from my HTC Inspire via Tapatalk


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

NapCat said:


> Why does the scale in the doctor's office ALWAYS read higher than the one at home ??


Do you weigh yourself fully clothed with shoes on at home?


----------



## Annalog

Can you guess why I slip off my shoes before I get weighed at my doctor's office?


----------



## spotsmom

To save about 6 oz?


----------



## Annalog

Annalog said:


> Can you guess why I slip off my shoes before I get weighed at my doctor's office?





spotsmom said:


> To save about 6 oz?


Is it really so that I won't appear an inch taller? Why did I weigh my shoes? Do they really weigh just over 1/2 pound each? Why are running shoes so heavy?


----------



## spotsmom

Are running shoes heavy so that you get more exercise?


----------



## John Dax

Is it snowing?


----------



## spotsmom

Why isn't it snowing?


----------



## Brianna Lee McKenzie

Isn't it too cold to snow?


----------



## geoffthomas

Are there any clouds to produce snow?


----------



## Annalog

I wonder how many KB'ers were celebrating the January Friday the 13th and how many are looking forward to celebrating the April and July Friday the 13ths?


----------



## telracs

three 13's this year?


----------



## John Dax

Is only three going to be enough?


----------



## Annalog

John Dax said:


> Is only three going to be enough?


Can there be more than three Friday the 13ths in a calendar year?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

How do smalls birds fly so well in high winds ??


----------



## telracs

NapCat said:


> How do smalls birds fly so well in high winds ??


african swallows?


----------



## Meb Bryant

Why can't I tell if my house bunny is male or female?


----------



## John Dax

Where did I leave my coffee?


----------



## spotsmom

If it keeps on snowing, can I get out of going to work tomorrow?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Where is that peanut butter I bought ?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

Where'd the jam go?


----------



## telracs

spotsmom said:


> If it keeps on snowing, can I get out of going to work tomorrow?


do you really want to?


----------



## kaotickitten

Why'd they cancel Quantum Leap?


----------



## Alle Meine Entchen

Why am I so sleepy?


----------



## kaotickitten

Why does Edward sparkle?


----------



## John Dax

kaotickitten said:


> Why does Edward sparkle?


If he was a contractor, would he spackle instead?


----------



## kaotickitten

Who wrote the bok of love?


----------



## telracs

kaotickitten said:


> Who wrote the bok of love?


what's a bok?


----------



## spotsmom

Is a bok related to a nano?


----------



## Tip10

You mean its not someone of the Choy family??


----------



## kaotickitten

I guess that is why I use spell check.

Are free refills really free if I paid 5 bucks for the cup in the first place?


----------



## telracs

kaotickitten said:


> I guess that is why I use spell check.
> 
> Are free refills really free if I paid 5 bucks for the cup in the first place?


would spell check help?


----------



## kaotickitten

if spell check didn't help why do they have it?


----------



## tsilver

When is my prince coming?


----------



## kaotickitten

Is he bringing potato chips with him?


----------



## Flurries Unlimited

Where's the beef?


----------



## Brianna Lee McKenzie

What's on t.v. tonight?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

ahhhhh...what's up Doc ?


----------



## spotsmom

Is it a good idea never to ask a proctologist "what's up, doc"?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Why is Coleman's Dry Mustard, $8.99 per 2oz tin?


----------



## telracs

NapCat said:


> Why is Coleman's Dry Mustard, $8.99 per 2oz tin?


where is that?


----------



## Colin Taber

Why can't I get up and do something useful?

I can see a perfectly comfortable chair next to my Kindle in the next room...


----------



## *DrDLN* (dr.s.dhillon)

Isn't everything we do is of some use.


----------



## Valmore Daniels

What happened today?


----------



## Annalog

Valmore Daniels said:


> What happened today?


Was it the same thing that happened briefly the night before when Chat stayed up while rest of KB was down?


----------



## tsilver

Who am I?


----------



## telracs

who stole my tissues?


----------



## Alle Meine Entchen

Why won't DS go to sleep?


----------



## John Dax

What did I do wrong to that cake?


----------



## vikingwarrior22

You want that?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

Why did my favorite watering hole suddenly close after 26 years?


----------



## kaotickitten

Why are yorkies so adorable?


----------



## geoffthomas

Aren't yorkies small and suitable as prey?


----------



## telracs

mom133d (aka Liz) said:


> Why did my favorite watering hole suddenly close after 26 years?


drought?


----------



## spotsmom

Why are there not enough satellites in the sky?


----------



## NapCat (retired)

Why not?


----------



## gina1230

How come?


----------



## spotsmom

Who is Cassius (in the movie "The Double")?


----------



## telracs

spotsmom said:


> Who is Cassius (in the movie "The Double")?


Clay?


----------



## geoffthomas

Why have we stopped asking silly questions here?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

Did we run out of questions?


----------



## telracs

did we run out of answers?


----------



## geoffthomas

Isn't the correct answer 42?


----------



## Tip10

Would that make the correct question be what summer was that?


----------



## telracs

geoffthomas said:


> Isn't the correct answer 42?


doesn't that depend on the question?


----------



## spotsmom

But what is the question?


----------



## Tip10

Aren't they all questions?
Isn't that the point?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

Was it the summer of '69?


----------



## Susan Alison

Is it supposed to be here?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

Is the coffee on?


----------



## Tip10

Valmore Daniels said:


> Is the coffee on?


On, Drank and Gone -- is there anymore??


----------



## kindleworm

Who is waiting for the new ipad ?


----------



## geoffthomas

what is an ipad?


----------



## gina1230

Is everything okay?


----------



## Susan in VA

After catching up on 20 pages of silly questions, am I dizzy?


----------



## *DrDLN* (dr.s.dhillon)

Is it really cool spring?


----------



## telracs

How do you get to Carnegie Hall?


----------



## balaspa

What's that thing over there?


----------



## Tip10

scarlet said:


> How do you get to Carnegie Hall?


Three lefts, two rights, and a wing and a prayer?


----------



## telracs

Tip10 said:


> Three lefts, two rights, and a wing and a prayer?


three lefts?


----------



## Annalog

Is spring the reason for the sunsine and blue skies today? Or is it because yesterday's winter storm blew away? I wonder if that is the same storm headed to Texas?


----------



## gina1230

Is it really raining here?


----------



## Susan in VA

Can't you look out the window to check?


----------



## gina1230

I suppose, but can you see the rain in the dark?


----------



## Susan in VA

Are there streetlights around that you could see the rain against?


----------



## Tip10

Aren't these supposed to be random?


----------



## D. Nathan Hilliard

Will there be cake?


----------



## Tony Richards

Why are people always asking silly questions?


----------



## JacksonJones

Does this dress make me look fat?


----------



## Tip10

Is there ever a safe answer to a question like that?


----------



## Meb Bryant

What *does* happen if you step on a crack?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

Will it break your mother's back?


----------



## *DrDLN* (dr.s.dhillon)

Why would it break your mother's back?


----------



## Annalog

Is the crack nearly a chasm? Could someone fall inside? Is it just large enough to trip?


----------



## Susan in VA

Meb Bryant said:


> What *does* happen if you step on a crack?


Your spike heel breaks off?


----------



## telracs

where did this fog come from?


----------



## Susan in VA

Does it look like Virginia fog?  Maybe it's the fog we were hoping would go away this morning?


----------



## gina1230

Do you drive a Toyota?


----------



## kindleworm

Should I mow the lawn ?


----------



## Susan in VA

Why would you want to do that when you could mow mine instead?


----------



## Alle Meine Entchen

Why did Penny have to die?


----------



## KMatthew

Why are they making so many reality shows about peoples jobs?


----------



## Darth John

Is this really just one big thread of random questions?


----------



## D/W

Why is ocean water salty?


----------



## tsilver

Why hasn't Brad Pitt admitted that we were lovers?


----------



## *DrDLN* (dr.s.dhillon)

DreamWeaver said:


> Why is ocean water salty?


Why salt keeps marine animals free of infection?


----------



## spotsmom

Is Duke's basketball program grossly overrated?


----------



## Keith Blenman

How does George Takai have nothing better to do?


----------



## RichardDR

Why does blue smell like three oranges but not on Tuesdays?


----------



## kindleworm

Why does my husky like to sunbathe ?


----------



## Vegas_Asian

Why did a cup of coffee seem like a good idea at midnight? 

Sent from my HTC Inspire via Tapatalk


----------



## gina1230

Does anyone like Blue Cheese?


----------



## Susan in VA

RichardDR said:


> Why does blue smell like three oranges but not on Tuesdays?


Why does my head suddenly hurt?


----------



## telracs

purple ice cream?


----------



## Vegas_Asian

flying scarlet piranha said:


> purple ice cream?


There is a Filipino ice cream that is purple. It's Ube ice cream. So addicting

Sent from my HTC Inspire via Tapatalk


----------



## loonlover

flying scarlet piranha said:


> purple ice cream?


Why not?

The Purple Cow in Little Rock uses purple ice cream in it's vanilla shakes. Kid's love it.


----------



## telracs

Vegas_Asian said:


> There is a Filipino ice cream that is purple. It's Ube ice cream. So addicting
> 
> Sent from my HTC Inspire via Tapatalk


How did you know what i bought?


----------



## *DrDLN* (dr.s.dhillon)

Have I bought anything lately?


----------



## tsilver

Is the IRS my friend?


----------



## L. T. Fawkes

gina1230 said:


> Does anyone like Blue Cheese?


Gotta have it with my hot wings.


----------



## Susan in VA

Why are your wings hot?  Have you been flying cross-country?


----------



## crca56

no, just hovering in place. can you really vaccuum a rainbow, or is the name misleading? and do they really need vaccuuming anyway?


----------



## Susan in VA

Maybe the same icky pollen mess is on the rainbows as on my car windows?


----------



## Vegas_Asian

Cinnamon toast crunch or fruity pebbles.

Sent from my Kindle Fire using Tapatalk 2


----------



## Annalog

Where did the time go?


----------



## *DrDLN* (dr.s.dhillon)

Are time and space related?


----------



## Annalog

When did the storage room run out of space?


----------



## Tip10

When it ran out of time?


----------



## Annalog

Maybe it ran out of energy?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

Any good telework positions open?


----------



## geoffthomas

Are you ready to work hard?


----------



## Tip10

wouldn't you rather hardly work?


----------



## jwest

why oh why are there sweet pickles?


----------



## jwest

tsilver said:


> Is the IRS my friend?


Aren't they everyone's friend?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

Anyone here like pickled onions?


----------



## Alle Meine Entchen

why didn't I save myself one of the 4 dozen cinnamon rolls I made last night?


----------



## Christopher Bunn

If the Universe is finite, what's on the other side?


----------



## Tip10

Christopher Bunn said:


> If the Universe is finite, what's on the other side?


Greener Grass??


----------



## Lily Mia

<-------- Do I look good in this?


----------



## Susan in VA

^^  What's going to happen if you ever change your avatar?


----------



## telracs

what about people who can't see avatars?


----------



## Lily Mia

Susan in VA said:


> ^^ What's going to happen if you ever change your avatar?


A bright flash!


----------



## jwest

How much could a woodchuck chuck...really? And what is chucking?


----------



## Susan in VA

Isn't chucking the same as throwing?  

And are there any woodchucks here that we could ask about their wood-chucking capabilities?


----------



## Tip10

Susan in VA said:


> Isn't chucking the same as throwing?


Depends if you are talking UP or DOWN doesn't it?


----------



## geoffthomas

Since when did we start caring WHAT Chuck does?


----------



## telracs

guess what i saw this morning?


----------



## That Weird Guy....

telracs said:


> guess what i saw this morning?


a Subway Car?


----------



## telracs

T.J. The Diva (but not really...) said:


> a Subway Car?


why would i mention that?


----------



## That Weird Guy....

telracs said:


> why would i mention that?


No clue. But I am 100% sure it was something that you saw this morning. I was unaware you wanted somethign out of the ordinary... 
But, you cannot deny that a Subway car was something you saw thing morning... so I was right!


----------



## Annalog

telracs said:


> guess what i saw this morning?


Did it result in your post on a happy thread?


----------



## telracs

Annalog said:


> Did it result in your post on a happy thread?


maybe?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

telracs said:


> guess what i saw this morning?


John Barrowman?


----------



## telracs

mom133d (aka Liz) said:


> John Barrowman?


didn't i say what, not who?


----------



## That Weird Guy....

telracs said:


> guess what i saw this morning?


The Enterprise Space Shuttle?


----------



## Tip10

Isn't that more correctly the Enterprise Non-Space Shuttle or Enterprise Not Quite Space Shuttle since it never went?


----------



## lucasfernan

Why don't I live closer to the bakery!?


----------



## telracs

Tip10 said:


> Isn't that more correctly the Enterprise Non-Space Shuttle or Enterprise Not Quite Space Shuttle since it never went?


I'm not the only one to think this, huh?


----------



## *DrDLN* (dr.s.dhillon)

Why USA prison population is the highest in the world?


----------



## Susan in VA

Tip10 said:


> Isn't that more correctly the Enterprise Non-Space Shuttle or Enterprise Not Quite Space Shuttle since it never went?


Shhh, you'll hurt its feelings. 

Did anybody else watch the recent landing at Dulles? Did you see the little US flag on top of the 747, near the front? Was that there all along, and if so, how did it survive the flight? Or is it somehow retractable so that they just put it up after landing?


----------



## Alle Meine Entchen

why is used car shopping so difficult?


----------



## kindleworm

Why are used car salesmen so dishonest ?


----------



## Alle Meine Entchen

kindleworm said:


> Why are used car salesmen so dishonest ?


The real question is, why are used car salesmen so pushy when they know you are no longer interested in the car?


----------



## telracs

is it bad that i no longer care about the new Sherlock Holmes season?


----------



## The Hooded Claw

Why can't I get excited about the 99 cent mysteries in the Kindle Deal of the Day?


----------



## telracs

The Hooded Claw said:


> Why can't I get excited about the 99 cent mysteries in the Kindle Deal of the Day?


Because the books are not that great?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

How is everyone?


----------



## Susan in VA

Can I stop the clock for a day or so and catch up on sleep?


----------



## That Weird Guy....

Why are some out of print book so gosh darn expensive while others are like 5 cents? What gives? As you can tell, I am very bitter about this. I want my books! Grrrr!


----------



## *DrDLN* (dr.s.dhillon)

Why I feel the print books will be in libraries only?


----------



## lucasfernan

Why is it so hard to find decent fish!?


----------



## Susan in VA

^^  For your aquarium or for your dinner?


----------



## telracs

why can't i remember the question i wanted to ask?


----------



## kindleworm

Will it rain today ?


----------



## lucasfernan

Where are my keys!?


----------



## gina1230

Why are records made to be broken?


----------



## Alexis-Shore

Are these boots really made for walking?


----------



## Joseph_Evans

Why do I only have one half of nearly every pair of socks I own? They have vanished! Somebody is stealing single socks and I have no matching pairs!


----------



## spotsmom

Why do carpet samples from the same company differ in name depending on which carpet store you're in?


----------



## Scott Bartlett

How many roads must a man walk down?


----------



## ericbenson81

what makes the world go round?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

Can you name that tune?


----------



## Amanda Leigh Cowley

Is it possible to cry underwater?


----------



## Keith Blenman

Does anybody react to car alarms any more?


----------



## Scott Bartlett

Why ask?


----------



## Brianna Lee McKenzie

What are you doing for the holiday?


----------



## *DrDLN* (dr.s.dhillon)

Why are we seeking the meaning of life?


----------



## JacksonJones

What the frap is this thing in my bagel?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

Do you prefer bagels over muffins?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

If you didn't come to party, why did you bother knocking on my door?


----------



## Alexis-Shore

How does one up jump the boogie?


----------



## Susan in VA

Is this thread hibernating?


----------



## telracs

Susan in VA said:


> Is this thread hibernating?


are you trying to wake me up?


----------



## Susan in VA

Why, are you One With The Thread?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

Who prays for rain?


----------



## loonlover

Farmers?


----------



## Annalog

Those of us who live in the desert?


----------



## geoffthomas

Why would you live in a dessert?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

Because it would be full of delicious flavor?


----------



## Susan in VA

But wouldn't it be kind of messy?


----------



## spotsmom

Can you drown in chocolate?


----------



## Susan in VA

Is there a chocolate fondue pan big enough??


----------



## crebel

Would a chocolate fountain work better?


----------



## telracs

are you people plotting my death by chocolate?


----------



## Tip10

Can you think of a better way to go?


----------



## telracs

did you know that kevin costner can sing?


----------



## Susan in VA

Everybody can sing... does he sing _well_?


----------



## geoffthomas

because the glass was too thin?


----------



## geoffthomas

Everyone now knows about ModPodge, don't they?


----------



## *DrDLN* (dr.s.dhillon)

Who is ModPodge?


----------



## Annalog

Does anyone else plant thirty year old seeds and expect them to grow?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

Is the coffee ready?


----------



## M.V. Kallai

Seeds are amazing! They can grow after a thousand years (sometimes).

To eat breakfast or not to eat breakfast?


----------



## Brianna Lee McKenzie

Anyone want to join us for steak & crab omelets for breakfast?


----------



## loonlover

Brianna Lee McKenzie said:


> Anyone want to join us for steak & crab omelets for breakfast?


Can you teleport some to Arkansas?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

Do you have any Grey Poupon?


----------



## *Sandy Harper*

What is Grey Poupon?


----------



## telracs

*Sandy Harper* said:


> What is Grey Poupon?


Not a mustard fan?


----------



## Alexis-Shore

What's the point of Wednesdays?


----------



## lucasfernan

Wednesdays delay the weekend, right?


----------



## MindAttic

Aren't weekends just weekdays without work?


----------



## geoffthomas

Will we get paid if we don't work?


----------



## telracs

isn't the point of Wednesday to do laundry?


----------



## Natasha Holme

Why do fools fall in love?


----------



## Susan in VA

Why are some people so unreliable?


----------



## telracs

Susan in VA said:


> Why are some people so unreliable?


what did i (not) do now?


----------



## Susan in VA

telracs said:


> what did i (not) do now?


Why, are you feeling guilty about something?


----------



## telracs

Susan in VA said:


> Why, are you feeling guilty about something?


should I?


----------



## Alexis-Shore

Do Catholics always feel guilty?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

When will the sun come out?


----------



## geoffthomas

Had the sun gone inside?


----------



## Randirogue

Who will forge me a knife big enough and strong enough to stab the sun in retaliation when it gives me headaches?


----------



## That Weird Guy....

Don't light sensitive headaches suck?


----------



## Brianna Lee McKenzie

Are headaches all in my head?


----------



## Randirogue

Just because something may be psychosomatic, does it mean the pain hurts less?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

Why so serious?


----------



## Randirogue

Can they ever replace the last joker?


----------



## spotsmom

Is there any hope of fixing my WiFi?


----------



## That Weird Guy....

When will my work get WiFi installed so I can watch Netflix on my Kindle at my desk?


----------



## tsilver

Can you be a senior delinquent?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

Isn't that a given?


----------



## Tip10

Isn't America a grand and glorious place to live?


----------



## geoffthomas

Are you going out and work in the sun this weekend?


----------



## Tip10

Is sightseeing along the beach work?


----------



## Alexis-Shore

Isn't it marvelous?


----------



## Aaron Scott

Why is colourful, and if so, how much?


----------



## telracs

why is there a motorcycle in the restaurant?


----------



## spotsmom

Did the Hard Rock Cafe close?


----------



## telracs

spotsmom said:


> Did the Hard Rock Cafe close?


which one?


----------



## Susan in VA

How did these weeds get to be so tall?


----------



## Alexis-Shore

Why can't I get this song out of my head?


----------



## crebel

Why am I awake so early when I am on vacation and can sleep as long as I want?


----------



## Susan in VA

Because there's so much to do on vacation?


----------



## telracs

want a cupcake?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

...Or some pie?


----------



## telracs

did you know


Spoiler



it's my birthday


?


----------



## Susan in VA

Are you planning to act your age?


----------



## Scott Bartlett

How do _you_ define regularity?


----------



## *DrDLN* (dr.s.dhillon)

Isn't that wonderful to be regular in everything?


----------



## Susan in VA

Where's the fun in that??


----------



## Tony Richards

DenverRalphy said:


> Why isn't 'phonetic' spelled like it sounds?


Good one!


----------



## Susan in VA

Doesn't Tony's keyboard have a question mark key?


----------



## telracs

Susan in VA said:


> Doesn't Tony's keyboard have a question mark key?


who is tony?


----------



## kindleworm

Why are there so many Japanese beetles?


----------



## telracs

credit or debit?


Spoiler



said by the cashier as i held the MONEY out to her.


----------



## Valmore Daniels

Why do people blame the weather?


----------



## Susan in VA

Isn't it a good thing that we HAVE weather?  If conditions were always the same, how could there be one kind of weather that would suit everybody?


----------



## Alexis-Shore

Why can't exercise be more fun?


----------



## Pietro Reviglio

who teaches a spider to weave its web?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

Do I have to do this all over again?


----------



## Alexis-Shore

What will you do today?


----------



## Annalog

Will I pass the hemocrit test at the Red Cross?


----------



## Vegas_Asian

Why do people stare at people with food in the school halfway? Do I have nutella somewhere on my face. 

Sent from my Desire HD using Tapatalk 2


----------



## Susan in VA

What the heck is that giant icky-looking bug, and which of my cats smashed it?


----------



## Alexis-Shore

Should I get a kitten?


----------



## Brianna Lee McKenzie

Did anyone miss me?


----------



## kindleworm

Is Christmas Eve only 3 months away ?


----------



## Tip10

Why do they wait till the busiest time of year to schedule *"non-mandatory"* training and then tell us we are _*expected*_ to attend??

Well, guess what -- I have real work to do so pfthpfthpfthpfthpfthpfthpfthpfthpfthpfth


----------



## JRWoodward

Why did the dog wait patiently for two hours in the side yard, so she could come in the house to pee?

Really, WHY?


----------



## Keith Blenman

Is there music in their hearts?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

Are their hearts in their music?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

Alexis-Shore said:


> Should I get a kitten?


Why not?


----------



## *DrDLN* (dr.s.dhillon)

Has anyone fallen in love at 70?


----------



## kindleworm

Are we there yet ?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

Why am I here?


----------



## geoffthomas

Will Microsoft survive the cloud?


----------



## JRWoodward

Where is my book I was reading?


----------



## spotsmom

Is it true blondes have more fun?


----------



## Natasha Holme

Where will I be in a year's time?


----------



## JRWoodward

Does this make me look old?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

Does this make me look young? (please say 'yes')


----------



## Brianna Lee McKenzie

Does this make me look?


----------



## Christopher Bunn

What is this strange little alien creature burrowing up through my rib cage doing with all this teeth and tentacles and I wonder if his name is Bob or Melvin or something like that?


----------



## Natasha Holme

Who, did you say, got murdered in the conservatory with the lead piping?


----------



## Brianna Lee McKenzie

With all the Christmas shows already airing, did we skip Thanksgiving?


----------



## Susan in VA

Where did everybody go??


----------



## Harley Christensen

Is fruitcake really even cake?


----------



## kindleworm

When will the Chicago area get some snow ?


----------



## Lee44

Fruitcake is a brick seasoned with sugar.


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

Doesn't it also have rum?


----------



## Keith Blenman

Why would it be hogging all the rum like that? Doesn't it know that maybe we could use some rum?


----------



## Susan in VA

How can it possibly take TWO WEEKS to replace window blinds?


----------



## kindlequeen

Why won't my cough go away?


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

What kind of dairy allergy/intolerance do I have that even Bailey's Irish Cream affects me?!


----------



## Harley Christensen

Where the heck did 2012 go


----------



## Susan in VA

What do you mean, it's sold out??


----------



## mom133d (aka Liz)

What do you mean it won't arrive by Christmas?


----------



## Lee44

What do you mean I have to pay off all the gifts I bought on my American Express by January 30th?


----------



## gljones

In a pinch, is it possible to use a fruitcake as a boat anchor?


----------



## DarkScribe

gljones said:


> In a pinch, is it possible to use a fruitcake as a boat anchor?


If you hit him on the head first - top stop him swimming back to the surface.


----------



## Harley Christensen

gljones said:


> In a pinch, is it possible to use a fruitcake as a boat anchor?


Would fruitcake be a boat anchor...or a boat sinker?


----------



## Susan in VA

Could a waterlogged fruitcake possibly get even heavier than one on land?


----------



## Harley Christensen

Could you still serve a waterlogged fruitcake...and more importantly, would anyone even notice?


----------



## Susan in VA

Harley Christensen said:


> Could you still serve a waterlogged fruitcake


Don't you think the strings on the racquet would break?


----------



## Tip10

Is the only reason my MIL makes fruit cake because she must sample all the ingredients to makes sure they are still good?

Oh, perhaps I should add -- she makes RUM soaked fruit cake!!


----------



## Lee44

Cobbie, yes, you are the only one! Brick cake err fruitcake is not good no matter what you do to it!!! 

I actually think that we could start a Brick cake err fruit cake thread. It would probably last till next Xmas filled with jokes about fruitcake!


----------



## Harley Christensen

Lee44 said:


> I actually think that we could start a Brick cake err fruit cake thread. It would probably last till next Xmas filled with jokes about fruitcake!


1001 Uses for Fruitcake?


----------



## Annalog

Cobbie said:


> LOL!
> 
> Am I the only one here who likes fruitcake?


No, I also like some fruitcakes. However I prefer thin slices.


----------



## Tip10

Annalog said:


> No, I also like some fruitcakes. However I prefer thin slices.


Soaked in Rum Me too, Lots and lots of Rum!!!


----------



## gljones

Is it socially unacceptable to wear sweat pants thru the entire month of December?


----------



## kindleworm

Leftovers, anyone ?


----------



## telracs

is it true that seeing a blue tint to everything is a side effect of Viagra?


----------



## Harley Christensen

Why did I eat that last piece of fudge?


----------



## Keith Blenman

Why didn't you cut the fudge down into two smaller pieces?


----------



## Lee44

Harley Christensen said:


> 1001 Uses for Fruitcake?


That would definitely be the name of that thread.


----------



## Harley Christensen

What the heck am I doing?


----------



## gljones

Why is my dog retarded?


----------



## Harley Christensen

Where the heck did all of this dirty laundry come from?


----------



## Keith Blenman

What do you mean I can't get a refund when the bottle labeled _love potion_ turned out to just be arsenic and food coloring?


----------



## Susan in VA

If the old saying about starting the new year as you mean to continue it is true, then I shouldn't do any housework today, right?


----------



## Brianna Lee McKenzie

I've been away for awhile, did anyone miss me?


----------



## Harley Christensen

Brianna Lee McKenzie said:


> I've been away for awhile, did anyone miss me?


Of course! The question is - did you miss us?!?!?!


----------



## Lee44

Harley, you are funny!


----------



## Filipa Fonseca Silva Author

How old are you?


----------



## Annalog

Filipa Silva said:


> How old are you?


Would you believe that I will be 60 in less than two years?


----------



## Natasha Holme

What would you call a pet budgie?


----------



## Annalog

Is it a male or female budgie?


----------



## Natasha Holme

The budgie mostly identifies as female.


----------



## *DrDLN* (dr.s.dhillon)

Do women really need viagara?


----------



## Lee44

I just found a chocolate cake recipe I was looking for, yum!


----------



## kindleworm

Is it ever going to snow in the Chicago area ?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

Is it Monday, already?


----------



## Lee44

When will the talking heads stop talking?


----------



## Natasha Holme

How many square animals can you name?


----------



## Harley Christensen

Why are the Superbowl commercials typically better than the actual Superbowl?


----------



## Lee44

Why does football take over the otherwise perfectly wonderful months of January and February?


----------



## Harley Christensen

Why do I buy more crap at Costco (Sam's Club) than I normally would, i.e. did I _really_ need a gallon of Ranch dressing?


----------



## geoffthomas

Why has it been more than a month since anyone posted in this thread?


----------



## Annalog

Are some of us "bumping" favorite threads?


----------



## crebel

How does a washing machine manage to turn long-sleeved dress shirts inside out??


----------



## Brianna Lee McKenzie

Why did I forget to post on this thread?


----------



## Lee44

What's up with Brandon Hantz?


----------



## Adrian Howell

What is a four-letter word that begins with W and ends with T?


----------



## telracs

wart?
wait?
what?
walt?
went?


----------



## Annalog

watt?


----------



## telracs

want?


----------



## telracs

whit?

is this turning into a spin off of the word association thread?


----------



## Lee44

Is there any Cool Whip left?


----------



## Brianna Lee McKenzie

yeah, want some?


----------



## telracs

did you not realized trains go in TWO directions?


----------



## geoffthomas

Two directions ..... at the same time?


----------



## *DrDLN* (dr.s.dhillon)

Why are more people traveling these days?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

Do you prefer flowers or plants for a garden?


----------



## crebel

Aren't flowers plants?


----------



## geoffthomas

Did you plant any flowers this year?


----------



## Annalog

How about flowers planted to eat as vegetables?


----------



## telracs

do you not realize that one person is trying to do the work of two today?
and that a little cooperation on your part will go far?


----------



## Jeff

Have you mistaken me for someone that cares?


----------



## Guest

Why are people posting in here?


----------



## Annalog

How long before I can run/walk at a pace of 16 minutes/mile for multiple miles? Will I be glad my daughter talked me into training to run with her in the Tinkerbell 1/2 marathon? Will my joints be happy?


----------



## Guest

Geoffrey said:


> How you doin'?


I'm fine. How about you?


----------



## kindleworm

Do you sing along with the radio ?


----------



## Adrian Howell

Is the Mars Rover really roving?


----------



## pauldude000

Why do people ask questions when they do not want the answer?
Can I turn this into let's provide an answer game?
Stranger, are you a total random stranger?
Is this twitter?
Can you tell I am tired?


----------



## Brianna Lee McKenzie

Can you speak French?


----------



## JRWoodward

If Batman fought James Bond, who would win?
If MEGALODON  fought the SharkNado, who would win?
If Grue's minions fought Wonka's Oompa-Loompas, who would win?
Why can't Donald Trump afford a better toupee?
If orange is the new black, what happened to bitter?


----------



## Natasha Holme

What is the sound of silence?


----------



## Annalog

Anyone else look for words in a Word Search that are not in thee search list? (Are DH and I strange for finding 24 in one on a McD tray liner?)


----------



## Caddy

Who came up with IFC's truly wonderful tagline?


----------



## gljones

Am I the last person on earth who has no facebook ID?


----------



## HappyGuy

Do we care?


----------



## Brianna Lee McKenzie

Is it Friday yet?


----------



## telracs

miss me?


----------



## Jeff

Who are you?


----------



## telracs

isn't it sad when the memory goes?


----------



## Jeff

Who me?


----------



## Jeff

Does your chewing-gum lose its flavor on the bedpost overnight?


----------



## Valmore Daniels

Are you ready for the holidays?


----------



## Natasha Holme

What colour is your favourite cocktail?


----------



## Doril

Sofie said:


> Why ask why?


Do you know there's a book by that name?


----------



## geoffthomas

Did we run out of questions?


----------



## Brianna Lee McKenzie

Is there really an answer for that?


----------



## telracs

who moved my chocolate?


----------



## Jane Bled

Who decided to dye Cheetos orange?


----------



## SunshineOnMe

Why are there orange stripes on your pants?


----------



## Annalog

Why are there black stripes on my sister's outfit? Why are there pom poms on my daughter's running shoes? Will the sorcerer's hat help me be fast enough? How many of us will run across the finish line on Sunday? Why is my head full of non-random questions?


----------



## Brianna Lee McKenzie

How many questions are we allowed?


----------



## telracs

how do you define random?


----------



## Ann Herrick

What if there were no hypothetical questions?


----------



## Natasha Holme

Marmite?


----------



## Susan Alison

Is the postman delivering anything today or can I safely take Jeff-Dog out for a walk and NOT come back to a 'Sorry I've missed you - your parcel is waiting to be collected in an office very difficult to get to' - ticket


----------



## kindleworm

When will Spring arrive?


----------



## geoffthomas

Will the economy ever make all of us happy?


----------



## *DrDLN* (dr.s.dhillon)

Does our happiness really depend on economy?


----------



## Caddy

how many parrots are in the rain forest?


----------



## geoffthomas

Is it raining on the parrots in the forest?


----------



## intinst

Wonder what comes next?


----------



## crebel

Who was that masked man that just posted in this thread?


----------



## intinst

Could it be the


----------



## *DrDLN* (dr.s.dhillon)

Is it fun or silly thread?


----------



## intinst

Could it be both & even more?


----------



## Annalog

Will all the items I dye today turn out the color I want? Will they be the same color?


----------



## geoffthomas

Will the dye ever come off of your hands?


----------



## kindleworm

Is tie-dye still in style?


----------



## intinst

When did it go out of style?  (I am sooo old)


----------



## BTackitt

What are little green men made of?


----------



## Natasha Holme

What colour is Tuesday?


----------



## geoffthomas

What happens tomorrow?


----------



## intinst

Will there be a tomorrow? (There wasn't in _Groundhog Day)_


----------



## kindleworm

How much is too much?


----------



## geoffthomas

Why do fools fall in love?


----------



## BTackitt

It's Friday, do I have to go to school AGAIN?


----------



## intinst

Who wrote the book of love?


----------



## madelyneld

What have I got in my pocket?


----------



## Natasha Holme

What time is love?


----------



## geoffthomas

Where are we going?


----------

