# The Here's-what-I-think-aliens-will-do-to-us-when-they-invade Thread



## JacksonJones (Feb 20, 2012)

So, what do you all think extra-terrestrial aliens will do to us when they invade?

My opinion is that they will either harvest a lot of our organs and maybe sell them in some kind of galactic market or they will turn our planet into a huge, planet-sized version of the Roman coliseum. Or maybe they will liberate the mice, who will turn out to be intergalactic mercenaries who somehow got marooned on Earth a long time ago.

What do you all think?


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## Tonyshoey (May 23, 2012)

Great topic! My theory is they will turn up, open the door of the space ship, look around and start tutting and shaking their heads at us before they make us clean up our planet. We will shuffle around mumbling and complaining and when we've finished they will give us a stern "Mum and Dad" lecture about looking after our stuff!


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## Betsy the Quilter (Oct 27, 2008)

I do worry about y'all... 

Betsy


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## telracs (Jul 12, 2009)

I think they will steal all our chocolate and ice cream.



Spoiler



mars needs DAIRY!


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## prairiesky (Aug 11, 2009)

I think that they will be amazed how far behind them we are technologically and help us advance.  That is, if we don't declare war on them first.  We seem to shoot first and think about it later.


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## MKR (May 25, 2012)

They'll ask us for directions. Space is a big place. It's easy to get lost.


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## Geemont (Nov 18, 2008)

You're assuming the aliens will recognize us as an intelligent species; they might look at as we look at anthills.

We might even fail to notice they're arrival.  They might be microscopic nanobots and the invasion came and went with out incident.


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## NogDog (May 1, 2009)

Seems to me that any alien race with the technology and resources to cross interstellar space with enough resources left to do anything by the time they got here would already be able to grow their own organs, thus I see no need for using us as organ donors -- not to mention how unlikely it is that our organs would be in any way compatible with theirs.

Besides, any sufficiently advanced species will probably have been replaced by machines (intentionally or not), and have no need for organic organs of any sort.


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## telracs (Jul 12, 2009)

actually, we are the aliens and have already invaded this planet.


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## JacksonJones (Feb 20, 2012)

nogdog~6op6ou said:


> Seems to me that any alien race with the technology and resources to cross interstellar space with enough resources left to do anything by the time they got here would already be able to grow their own organs, thus I see no need for using us as organ donors -- not to mention how unlikely it is that our organs would be in any way compatible with theirs.
> 
> Besides, any sufficiently advanced species will probably have been replaced by machines (intentionally or not), and have no need for organic organs of any sort.


But what about organ harvesting from a cuisine perspective?


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## Tonyshoey (May 23, 2012)

I've thrown out my old casio keyboard after reading about all this organ harvesting.


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## NogDog (May 1, 2009)

JacksonJones said:


> But what about organ harvesting from a cuisine perspective?


Nah, machines don't have taste buds. They're probably already out there in the Oort cloud having a grand old time gathering up all the minerals and organic compounds they need without having to waste energy down here in a gravity well.


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## sheiler1963 (Nov 23, 2011)

The aliens came,
From a far distant world
In a large yellow ship 
That blinked as it twirled.
It rounded the moon
And entered our sky.
We knew they had come
But we didn't know why.

Bright the next morning
With noisy commotion
The ship slowly moved
Out over the ocean.
It lowered a tube
And drained the whole sea
For transport back home
To their Galaxy.

The tube then sucked up
The clouds and the air
Causing no small amount
Of Earthling despair.
With nothing to breathe
We started to die
"Help us! Please stop!"
Was the public outcry. 

A hatch opened up
And the aliens said,
"We're sorry to learn
That soon you will be dead,
But though you may find
This slightly macabre,
We prefer your extinction
To the loss of our job. 

Calvin cartoon 8/10/1992

Yeah I do that. I keep what I call, 'my book I write stuff in' and I knew in 1992 when I read it in the Sunday comics page that it was something I was going to want to have some day. Today was that day apparently.


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## The Hooded Claw (Oct 12, 2009)

They will come here To Serve Man, of course.


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## telracs (Jul 12, 2009)

The Hooded Claw said:


> They will come here To Serve Man, of course.


with fries on the side...


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## The Hooded Claw (Oct 12, 2009)

telracs said:


> with fries on the side...


Hmmm, is that ketchup on the fries, or....something else?


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## TouchedByaKindle (May 4, 2012)

I think they will put us in a caged environment and watch us as if we were entertainment to them.


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## MKR (May 25, 2012)

TouchedByaKindle said:


> I think they will put us in a caged environment and watch us as if we were entertainment to them.


I knew there was something odd about Jerry Springer.


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## JacksonJones (Feb 20, 2012)

MKR said:


> I knew there was something odd about Jerry Springer.


Jerry Springer is probably key to the upcoming alien invasion.


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## JimC1946 (Aug 6, 2009)

One word: O-R-I-F-I-C-E-S.


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## traceya (Apr 26, 2010)

Sorry but I just found this thread hilarious  

Should aliens land here we probably would try to attack them, sadly that seems to be our answer to everything.


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## telracs (Jul 12, 2009)

as a friend has said, the robots are our only help, as long as they don't go all _Terminator_ on us.


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## Geemont (Nov 18, 2008)

And then there are the aliens who come to our planet with a message of peace; unfortunately, they communicate with brain to brain microwaves and whenever they "speak" to us they cook our minds into mush, thereby commuting an act of aggression and war with their "words" of universal brotherly love.  




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## Jorja Tabu (Feb 6, 2012)

MKR said:


> I knew there was something odd about Jerry Springer.


LOL

I'm never going to be able to watch that show without thinking of this thread. And honestly, that kinda makes it better, in a demented sort of way.


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## intinst (Dec 23, 2008)

Elvis isn't dead, he just went home.


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## JimC1946 (Aug 6, 2009)

Klaatu barada nikto.


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## Tony Richards (Jul 6, 2011)

The aliens might snub us, going about their own business and completely ignoring us. That would be embarrassing.


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## Aaron Scott (May 27, 2012)

I was just thinking today how, if aliens are getting to know us by TV, are likely to think almost everyone is either a serial killer, a lawyer, a doctor, or somehow involved in the mob.

People say violence on TV isn't a good thing, but when you think about it, if aliens see how much we like to blow up stuff, they may think twice about invading.


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## anguabell (Jan 9, 2011)

They will finally take me home


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## The Hooded Claw (Oct 12, 2009)

AaronScott said:


> I was just thinking today how, if aliens are getting to know us by TV, are likely to think almost everyone is either a serial killer, a lawyer, a doctor, or somehow involved in the mob.


They'll also wonder where the vampires are.


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## Nick Steckel (Sep 2, 2010)

AaronScott said:


> I was just thinking today how, if aliens are getting to know us by TV, are likely to think almost everyone is either a serial killer, a lawyer, a doctor, or somehow involved in the mob.
> 
> People say violence on TV isn't a good thing, but when you think about it, if aliens see how much we like to blow up stuff, they may think twice about invading.


What would they make of Snooki?


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## telracs (Jul 12, 2009)

Nick Steckel said:


> What would they make of Snooki?


You mean she ISN'T an alien?


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## Aaron Scott (May 27, 2012)

Sadly they'll think Snooki is our leader.


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## JacksonJones (Feb 20, 2012)

Aaron Scott said:


> Sadly they'll think Snooki is our leader.


Just the fact that a Snooki exists means we deserve to be invaded and subjugated. And then forcibly resettled on some hostile planet in the Betelgeuse system where most of us will be consumed by large, venomous ladybugs.


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